I feel so pathetic. I am so lazy and have no expertise or in depth knowledge in anything. I have a stem degree I had no interest in so I forgot everything immediately. I put no effort in to it after a while and passed with an acceptable grade which is kind of an achievement but not really.
I have a low paying but outwardly respectable job but I do brain-dead shit and I do almost no work. Whenever I've had to stay from 9-5 at any job I felt like my life was immediately over. Or even 5 hour part time job shifts were unbearable.
I just wish I had the balls and work ethic to go home and work hard on one thing but you always get insulted if you don't do loads of shit. You like books? Well read shitloads of books and only read the ones praised by the dumb masses (classics and NYT best sellers). You want to learn programming? Masturbate with functional nonsense or else you're dumb.
And not only all that, I feel guilty over process as well. I am constantly trying to analyse my psychology as if I have no willpower. "Shall I exercise first and then do my chores? If I exercise first then I won't do the chores."
And for over 600 (probably no exaggeration) times in the past 3 years I have had junk food and coffee while telling myself it's the last time and tomorrow I will stop for a long time. And when I worked in an awful part time job I would always tell myself I'd work hard when I got home on intellectual stuff. And then I'd completely waste my free time on the internet.
I feel like I have been procrastinating starting real life because I see it as a load of shit I have to do to avoid being ostracised by society, rather than the stuff I want to do.
I could go on about being an ugly autist beta loser loner etc but I can't even enjoy my free time or make it productive. I see tonnes of attractive normies getting everything handed to them and it demoralises me so much. It is like salt in the wounds.
Get therapy or kill yourself. Quit posting this loser shit
Jonathan Jackson
If you have family to live with, just be a slacker and stop giving a fuck. Work temp jobs and contribute to society as little as possible. You don't owe anyone anything, live life however the fuck you want to.
Cooper Adams
Try drugs?
Brayden Lewis
So you have a stem degree and a paying job. I don't see the problem. Don't you have little goals you work towards? Like spending money on a house, or moving out if you still live with mom.
I'll tell you what user, explain to me your living arrangement and ill tell you what to do to fix your life.
Blake Hill
Stop doing things that don't interest you first off. Working out and cooking your own meals is pretty basic though, they aren't nessecarily fun or interesting but are very rewarding in the long run, so do it for the sake of health primarily (productive).
But other than that, stop feeling like you SHOULD do things that don't interest you. Try new things, new jobs, new activites and see what gets you going again. I know the feeling and I'm in a similar situation. I am currently in the process of taking my driver's license and actually taken by how interested I've gotten in cars. Now, it's maybe not a future career or ultimate destiny but will definitely become a hobby for me.
The key is to try new things. You'll never get closer to your "true" self otherwise. And stop trying to make everything you do productive. Get the basics down, at least try to exercise (just a 10 minute walk is better than nothing) and try to cook your own meals. Then throw yourself into completely new situations and see what happens.
Grayson Reyes
Currently live in London and have an outwardly respectable job but it doesn't pay me much. I live on my own in a flat and if I could go a month without wasting money on coffee or junk food I would not save more than £150. That's iron willpower savings not my zero willpower level. My job requires so little work or time in the office it is incredible. This week may be a 4 month high in terms of workload. I have about a day's worth of work to do this week with close to zero time pressure.
I have interviews for better jobs that start later this year and slightly different jobs that could improve my CV but pay a bit less right now. I also apply to part time jobs for extra money but I would probably feel too humiliated to work any of these.
I feel so pathetic about not taking advantage of my free time.
Asher Cook
live in the woods and become the unabomber m8, it's the only way
Nathan Miller
>Currently live in London
think I've identified the problem mate
Adam Bell
The swedecuck is right.
You should be proud of yourself that you completed college and got a good job. Now tap into your inner meme self and go off instinct of what you should achieve next. Personally I think reading books is for fags and to pass the time I got back into vanilla wow.
Now is the time to do what you waned to as a kid but either way couldn't financially or because your parents were raging drug addicts that smoked meth and beat you.
I'm assuming you live on your own, if you don't Then I strongly suggest moving out.
Hunter Kelly
> You want to learn programming? Masturbate with functional nonsense or else you're dumb. You aren't looking for validation in Sup Forums of all places, are you?
Also > Seeking external validation Validate yourself first. You exist. So what? Haters gonna hate. Now, what do you want to do? Write software? Then just do it until you are happy with what YOU made. There are two kinds of criticism your work will receive in any medium: Positive, from non-experts or emotionally secure experts, and negative from insecure novices who feel threatened that you are stepping into their domain.
After a while, you grow less interested in how the novice masses and sadists spew hatred toward you, and you just do what you want because it makes you happy.
Brandon Reed
You've got the wrong mentality user. instead of being unhappy with what you don't have, be happy with what you do have. 1) at least you aren't a nigger 2) you've got a job 3) presumably a roof over your head 4) food in your stomach. etc. If you can't be content with what you have, go out and get what you want. Don't judge your "standing" in life by what retarded normies think is acceptable or unacceptable. Especially the normies in your country who applaud the erosion of civil liberties and violent pig shit ignorant immigrant takeover. Ask yourself what you really want, then carve out a path to achieve it. If you get bogged down in depression, the juden win.
Kevin Peterson
Everyone will be like this when they're freezing to death and can't eat.
Landon Torres
>FEEL >FEEL >FEEL >FEEL
there's your problem faggot, you place too much emphasis on how you feel people perceive you when in reality no one gives a shit when they're too worried about paying their bills or the latest niggerball game.
Bentley Ward
>niggerball
What sport is this
Ian Morgan
Bro your not posting what stem degree you got. I got a botany degree and am getting a PhD in crop breeding. Dupont, monsanto, and bayer have offered me 100k positions as hot shot scientist. my mommy will be so happy and cook me her disgusting non meat tendies.
Christopher Parker
Realize that this is pride talking. Realize that you are prideful, extremely so. You are prideful because you are working against your true self, denying it, suffocating it, because you've been convinced you know better than your own nature. That's the bad news.
The good news is that you feel like shit. That's the best feeling you could possibly have in this situation. Be thankful, beyond thankful, that you haven't given up hope subconsciously, that you haven't descended to the level of the NEETs and the damned.
What you need to do is die. Or prepare to do it, at least. Abandon what you think you know about yourself, what you think you think you know about yourself. Don't trust any of your thoughts, except one - that you'll get through this. All the other thoughts are just that: vapour. Nonexistent. They can't hurt you. They may be scary, terrifying, living nightmares to consider - but they can't hurt you.
Realize you'll be okay. Accepting this is not a matter of intellect or logic, but a matter of will. From now on, consider intellect and logic your enemy. It's good at connecting your perceptions into a narrative, but terrible at confirming if that narrative is even close to correct. So disregard it. This will be hard, but is also a matter of will.
After you've apprehended this fact, start feeling your dread. It will be terrifying, and your narrative will scream at you not to do it. You'll probably lose sleep, and it will consume your waking thoughts. For a while, it will feel like you're in a living nightmare. But there is no more satisfying feeling than realizing you have the ability (and you do) to stare that fear in the face, and live with it. People have told you all your life to be courageous, and you might not have been sure what that means. real lasting change only comes through courage, and the best way to cultivate courage is to pinpoint that darkness, sit down, and dare it to destroy you.
Hudson Scott
Well what do you want to do?
Mason Sanders
Demoralization thread.
Subversion and demoralization is the strongest weapon of the enemy. When you come here (now), you see tons of defeatist threads declaring that things are hopeless and much more (by way of shill posts) within valid threads. These people are often paid-posters seeking to remove Trump's voting base (from all forums) for the 2020 election. They want you demoralized and gone; a board culture take-over. They also know that Trump won because most White people in the US voted for him. They'll demoralize via:
>why do autists/asocial/whatever frequent Sup Forums >le 56% >I regret voting for Trump >Everyone is race-mixing >All women are whores, MGTOW (reduce white births) >Other races are more successful >Amerimutt meme.jpg (if used as ident politics to degrade or derail, American Whites have ~98% genetically pure European dna) >Sup Forums will defend this
The point of such posts are to break your will to resist and it is important to be aware of it, because if you are not aware that it is an attempt to demoralize you, then eventually it will slowly start sinking in like a poison. Media reported that Sup Forums, to a degree, helped Trump get elected, so they're on the attack to de-platform us. Many times, these shill posters are (((University)))-indoctrinated neo-commies (think blue-hair SJW). They are a mix of "trolling the nazis" to "Fuck Drumpf, Sup Forums is OURS now".
Please watch ex-KGB propagandist Yuri Bezmenov explaining how the Soviet Union established a network of traitors to slowly eat away at the foundations of Western societies: youtube.com/watch?v=n4ZxO5I-s4E
I’m in a similar position OP - i have a stem degree and a good paying job; but I don’t LOVE the field. I work directly with project managers and principles, and despite their high salaries, their careers seem miserable. But I see many many other people bragging about all their successes and promotions along in their careers, and I get jealous, or I feel like I’m slacking or something.
Its a weird position to be in, and a source of a lot of anxiety. I bike ride & walk, and i play music and produce audio & attend stand up comedy. I have lots of hobbies and interests; but work and family stuff take up so much time, its easy to get drowned in the anxiety of feeling like you are lacking
Brayden Ross
You know what would help you mate? Posting a thread about your problems like as if Sup Forums was your personal blog, please do not try to man up and solve them like a good little soldier, just enjoy the autistic screeching
Nathaniel Rivera
This
Cameron Kelly
You realize that by posting an image, you have cancelled your sage (which I did not btw).
Makes sense, except watching the world burn is why I come here. I'm not going anywhere.
Luis Parker
Change junk food to meat meat meat, you think less about feels
