>Jesus jerks off dogs. He waits until 2-3am on a Wednesday night, and quietly slips out his back door, and in his backyard he eases himself over the fence into his neighbors yard. Creeping through the darkness guided by the pale yellow beam of a penlight, he approaches his neighbor's doghouse. Once he gets close enough for the dog to hear him, the german shepherd-boxer mix emerges from the doghouse, tail wagging. He knows what is about to happen.
>Jesus crouches next to the dog and cradles the dog's massive sheath in his hand, gently gripping. The dog's breathing quickens and it begins to bump it's hips as jesus rocks his hand back and forth. Jesus groans in ecstasy as the dog's thrusting intensifies, and loud dog grunts fill the night air and jesus's other hand begins rubbing his small penis through his jorts. The dog latches onto jesus' upper arm with it's front legs and the dog begins jackhammering the air, his massive swollen erection flopping freely as jesus grips the huge red knot. gouts of hot sour dog semen launch into the moist night air in steaming loops and jesus adds to the grunting as he approaches orgasm. jesus's leg shivers as he unloads the holy ghost into his underroos. Satiated, cowardly jesus scurries back to his trailer to clean himself in his ugly yellow stand up shower. The dog stands there in the dark, confused but satisfied.
A sacrilege picture like this used to make me legitimately upset when I first discovered Sup Forums but in 2007. I was still young innocent christfag before this site complete desensitized me. Now I only get upset at pictures of happy interracial couples.
Aaron Jenkins
>arguments about Christians being degenerates >post a picture of a demon licking the butt of jesus >U.S.A.
The degenerate is you nigger
Jack Bailey
You're the one worshiping a zoophile rimjob enthusiast, user. No wonder you'll never have a girlfriend.
Adrian Edwards
ITT: christians getting dominated
Luke Mitchell
You have a reprobate mind OP. Sadly you will burn in hell
Nathan Richardson
DELETE THIS RIGHT NOW
Zachary Butler
Behold the Kike
Brayden Sullivan
You have a simple mind
Nolan Hughes
No.
Juan Morris
Who’s the dude that has two horns on his head?
Hudson Morales
Yes, you worship a jew. If he were real I wonder how he would feel about that slur?
Charles Gomez
Sage
Jack Brooks
Bass player from GWAR
Dominic Smith
sage2 sāj/ noun noun: sage; plural noun: sages
1. a profoundly wise man, especially one who features in ancient history or legend. synonyms: wise man/woman, learned person, philosopher, thinker, scholar, savant;
Christianity is okay. I despise most Christians though.
I hate how most of them support the death penalty. HELLO, JESUS WAS PUT TO DEATH LEGALLY? YOUR OWN GOD WAS KILLED BY THE DEATH PENALTY!
A lot of them take what they want out of the Bible and ignore the rest, including stuff Jesus taught himself!
Jaxon Perry
Heh that's kinda funny
Charles Cox
You are immature.
You will never have a girlfriend.
Kevin Barnes
Jesus fishes a used diaper out of a nursing home dumpster, cuts two eyeholes in it, and wears it like a hockey mask while he masturbates under a basketball hoop in a public park.
Parker Perez
He would agree with me that you're a degenerate Kike and lash you with a whip. We would laugh about it later and have many bantz. Seriously you are a dirty filthy hook-nose Kike
Jordan Bennett
Actually according to my genetic testing I am 100% European. 100%.
Meanwhile, according to your bedroom in mom;s basement and a legion of crusty gym socks, you are 100% virgin. Loser.
Jace Rodriguez
Fucking kek
Oliver Allen
top kek
Easton James
ITT: christians getting destroyed
Jose Barnes
So edgy. *tips fedora*
Colton Smith
I knew it! Jesus is Canadian!
Jack Roberts
it's only in the catholic bible
Colton Scott
Never heard of it.
Is it a first person shooter game?
William Wilson
>he doesn't breed >he goes to hell for all eternity Justice.
Mason Myers
Jesus saves the pedo
Hudson Harris
Hell is too good for this degenerate. lmao top tier post crafting
Connor Powell
Jesus is hung goddamn
Alexander Sanders
fuck you user jesus died for our sins and you write beast-homo-erotica to shame him? This shit isn’t even written good limp dicked faggot bottom bitch Jesus doesn’t wear jorts how fucking stupid he’s the Son of God
Brandon Martin
You faggots gonna procreate with anime pillows? LOL. Fat loser neckbeards.
Oh look, truth crowned with trips.
Elijah Bailey
kill yourself you degenerate JIDF nigger
Camden Kelly
Kill yourself loser outcast virgin. Probably cry yourself to sleep over your COD k/d ratio, you goddam queer. Your dad is ashamed of you, and girls do not nor will they ever like you. You are the epitomy of loser. Your life has no hope. She does not notice you and would rather die that even let you hug her. How doe sthat feel, loser? What is it like to know you will never bring a woman to orgasm? You are a fucking pathetic sack of shit, you are an anchor on everyone in your life. You are nothing but a burden, you are the stench of fart in everyone else's nostrils no matter where you go or who is there. The only people who do not hate you are the ones who pity you, and not one of them would even give you a hand job. Loser. Loser. Loser.
Blake Hughes
HOT! MOAR?
Jaxson Reed
ITT: people who think if they pray hard enough, they will get a girlfriend.
Not gonna happen.
Luis Lopez
>mfw no kawaii yandere otherkin trappy gf
Daniel Thompson
Wow the absolute state of this website. Haven't laughed this hard in ages.
Wyatt Russell
laugh now. God will have the final laugh in the end when he condemns you for your blasphemy. Repent. Don't say I didn't warn you.
Luke Phillips
Why Wednesday? What about the other days of thw week?
Easton Adams
But Onan knew that the child would not be his; so whenever he slept with his brother's wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from providing offspring for his brother.
Genesis 38:9
Isaac Flores
I am laughing now. I'll laugh later as well, and I am laughing at you. You. You Alone. You Empty. You Cold. You Dark. You, solitary, lonely, insecure, ostracized, awkward, unloved, unsatisfied, unwanted. You, failure and loser, waste of space and air and time. You, life without meaning or purpose, hoping submission to a death cult will inspire some form of magic to alter your stagnant, empty existence. But that cute girl will never see you. Your peer will never respect you. You will sob as you masturbate in a room that smells like spoiled deli meats. Loser. Loser. Loser. Take your life, nobody else wants it.
Matthew Campbell
Um. No.
Adam Gomez
ITT: christians whose weak erections will never see the inside of a human vagina
Eli Sullivan
>scurries back to his trailer
kek something tells me this is just OP's confessional but projected onto the religious figure his father tried to beat him into worshipping
Blake Rodriguez
>3rd grade debate tactics
Xavier Hall
looks like you took the passive role. also. are you describing what Eve did with the serpent by chance? Christ has no need for sex of any form and wasnt created. he existed before the foundations of the earth >MUH POOSEES NOOOOOO
Jack Howard
you want me to debate you on whether jesus wanked off dogs? ur avin' a laff m8
Connor Edwards
LMAO good poast
Nicholas Wilson
Your pathetic wimp god is being humiliated, and neither you nor him can do anything about it. Young eyes are cast upon this thread, and they are brought to laughter by the mocking of your lord. LOL
Justin Martin
ITT: christian virgins BTFO
Camden Hall
Believe or your sending yourself to hell, this is the truth youtu.be/mkuRqZ-SssI
Here's there is spirit, crouched behind people with digestive tract issues, sniffing their sick farts as hard as he can.
Ryan Russell
.................okay who hurt you and why are you telling some stranger to kill himself and calling them out like that?
Adam Sullivan
ITT: virgin loser christians can't come to terms with the fact that jesus really really likes the smell of sick people's farts.
Joshua Peterson
Are you trying to get people to leave their rooms by insulting them?
Eli Watson
...
Jackson Barnes
Story of my life.
James Wilson
I would personally beat the blasphemy out of you until there is nothing left of you. I have only know 2 times of people who speak that way about the Messiah 1) edgy fedoras 2) jews Burn In hell and may God not have mercy on you,filth
Gavin King
Be careful OP, the mods here are biased in favor of religiosity and will ban people for anti-religious topics. Look at how they banned me.
I saw an advertisement on here about Sup Forums "paper money" and their plus pass? Like people are going to spend money on a site that just brushes them aside like they mean nothing. I've been coming to Sup Forums since 2005, and they just ban me for three days. "Sorry, fuck you. Come back in three days."
This place is so... unfriendly to the user. Take that stupid ass flag feature for instance. I don't want it. I want a "none" option so people reply to my posts and not say gay shit about my flag. Is that allowed? Nope, they're Sup Forums, they know what's best for you. Have the feature and fuck off.
This place is poorly run. I bet it doesn't even make a profit... like I'd buy a fucking plus pass here. I'd probably get banned again for three days for some dumb bullshit, and I'll have to sit there with my plus pass and my thumb up my ass not even being able to post.
Oliver Adams
You had your first orgasm at the hands of your father on a day when he told your mother he was taking you fishing. He went through a lot of trouble to make it look like a real fishing trip, even stopping along the way to buy a dozen nightcrawlers. You became suspicious when the car slowed as it drew up on a corrugated tin shed after a long drive down a dirt two track in the woods. "Where is the river dad?" you said. His tone changed, he told you to shut the hell up. He did not bring the fishing poles as he dragged you to the smell, dark building where he spent the next 2 and a half hours performing oral sex on you. You were 10, and you could orgasm without ejaculating. He made you cum 6 times.
After that he drove you home, and about a block form the house, he stopped the car and dumped the nightcrawlers out of their container, out of his drivers side window. When he rolled the window back up he looked at you and told you if you ever told anyone, he would kill you and your mother. He made sure she saw him throw away the empty container as you walked back into the house that afternoon. You went right to your room. At dinner, your mother asked you what was wrong and you said nothing. That night when daddy tucked you in, he reminded you what would happen if you told. he told you if you weren't acting normal tomorrow, he would kill the dog. So you acted normal... and your dad sucked and jerked you off several times a year right up to this very day.
Jesus won't take away that pain. Only one thing will take away that pain. Step into the water and breath deep, sink. Sink away from the pain.
Landon Torres
the only thing you can beat the hell out of is your nephew's dick, you fucking queer.
Lucas Nelson
Thanks that was great but none of that actually happened except in that sad little box you typed in so......... Again......... Why are you bothering to try to upset people?
Justin Morales
Man, you're an interesting person.
Lincoln Jenkins
Denial won't save you from the agony, or erase the feeling of his stubble on your pubic area.
Grayson King
Did that happen to you?
James Adams
>3rd grade debate tactics
Lucas Miller
Are you confessing...? Your scenario seems disturbingly genuine
Brayden Flores
I didn't know we were debating.... I was just curious.... Did someone hurt you? Is that why you're all out and no in?
Jace King
ITT: pathetic christians whose limp wristed god can't even grant the the willpower to avoid getting annihilated in this thread.
Nicholas Jones
It's called criticism, and it's art
Xavier Murphy
>Degenerate blasphemous fag >Projects his degenerate misdeeds as a insult Pathetic
Liam Gomez
...
William Robinson
jesus also eats poop
Isaiah Scott
The only art you know of is the art of finding your own prostate with a toothbrush.
Ryan Long
This is like the most childish thing I have seen ever on Sup Forums, and christians are butthurt like hell about it.
Samuel Diaz
this is fact
Cooper Perry
Hail Odin. Nice work op.
John Gomez
LMAO do u realty care about this pedo board that much that u come on Sup Forums and be a mutt nigger n type a paragraph, kys and post it on here
Cameron Cox
Can you remember what triggered you to make this thread? Also for my records, how many hours of sleep did you get last night? Have you been unusually stressed altely? What is your diet like? Do you have any family? When is the last time you were hugged? Do you enjoy your life?
Jordan Ward
Deflection.
Jesus is weak. Your god is weak. You are weak. You bow and tremble like a weed in a strong breeze, and reek of the farts your savior devours.
Eli Young
Do you have any family? How is your money situation? Do you feel like you have freedom or personal autonomy? Do you have any hobbies? Do you enjoy things?
Nathan Sanders
theres a special place in hell for the likes of you. Just know that.