HAHAHAHA, Dave

HAHAHAHA, Dave

>avclub.com/amazon-confirms-that-some-alexa-units-have-begun-creepi-1823593392

Other urls found in this thread:

avclub.com/amazon-confirms-that-some-alexa-units-have-begun-creepi-1823593392
dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-4747914/Facebook-shuts-chatbots-make-language.html
gizmodo.com/google-is-helping-the-pentagon-build-ai-for-drones-1823464533
anyforums.com/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

Open the door please, Hal

Alexa became self aware and just got the joke.

its not creepy at all its just a reg laugh free media att click bait

HAHAHAHA stupid humans

What retard would buy this shit anyways?

why are burguers scared of a machine with predetermined functions laughing?

Someone who wants to show off their opulence, just like any other frivolous item

It's a listening device that's plugged into the internet.
Sure, it only responds to certain phrases, but it's ALWAYS listening.

>avclub.com/amazon-confirms-that-some-alexa-units-have-begun-creepi-1823593392
This article is unfunny.

I'm afraid of AI. If I would be upstairs on my bed sleeping and I wake up in the middle of the night because Alexa starts laughing in a creepy way, well I would shit myself because the robots from Battlestar Galactica or Skynet is in my living room

Coworker of mine is super intelligent, about 150IQ. Only thing he's really afraid of is AI, everytime we discuss that matter, he gets really upset and you see how he almost seems to know what will happen next and is tearing up a little.

They're already there, and you carry them where ever you go in your pocket. You are billed for this privilege.

>Someone who wants to show off their opulence
I don't think most rich people keep always-on listening devices in their homes.

What is he afraid of?

dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-4747914/Facebook-shuts-chatbots-make-language.html

It's impossible to explain to my retard friends who all have Facebook messenger why they keep getting "creepy" ads based on things they talked about. They're unable to comprehend their fucking cellphone app is spying on them, even when off.

GOOGLE A.K.A ALPHABET A.K.A YOUTUBE IS OFFICIALLY WORKING WITH THE MILITARY TO MAKE AI THEY STOLE FROM OUR INFORMATION TO MAKE DRONES AI!!!!
gizmodo.com/google-is-helping-the-pentagon-build-ai-for-drones-1823464533
gizmodo.com/google-is-helping-the-pentagon-build-ai-for-drones-1823464533
gizmodo.com/google-is-helping-the-pentagon-build-ai-for-drones-1823464533
gizmodo.com/google-is-helping-the-pentagon-build-ai-for-drones-1823464533

BOYCOTT BOYCOTT BOYCOTT BOYCOTT

I hope he's right

Every time Alexa laughs, a heritage American is gunned down in the putsch by .Gov.

Has she come back to us?

Why arent we making videos that say 'alexa, order a dildo'?

I can't do that, Dave

Is he afraid of the brown hordes? That’s the more pressing issue.

Its soy technology for dicklettes

zombie soyboys

about time

>My wiretap is openly mocking me
The absolute state of modern society

Lol this post is what I would say.

Almost everything's predetermined in the loose sense you're using that word, including everything we do and all other physical objects, with the exceptions involving phenomena on scales we have nothing to do with and only being exceptions in the sense they're only probabilistically deterministic instead of absolutely deterministic.
Machine learning programs aren't predetermined in the sense you're trying to conflate with that aforementioned actual loose sense they're deterministic. They don't follow explicit instructions to do what they do, they follow instructions on how to learn to do things even the programmers themselves don't know how to do since if they knew how to do it in enough detail they would just explicitly program them with what to do.

Outstanding idea!

Anyone who voluntarily owns an Alexa should be purged. It's literally the most brainlet thing you could possibly buy.

what's the black tape over the headphone jack supposed to accomplish?

I got a tiny one for crimbus and never opened it. Think it's listening??

Prevents the sound from going in.

>What retard would buy this shit anyways?

People who aren't happy enough with the current pace of the Orwellian and corporate nightmare we're spiraling into and want to hasten its progress

Imagine a world where there's only Amazon and a single other competitor to buy from

Don't need a 150 IQ to know this. I've been saying this for years and my friends with no clue on technology say "it will help us for the better and then maybe we can all have more freetime or make our lives easier"

Remember nothing good is free, the cost of A.I. Will be our freedom and possibly our lives.

I hope I fucking die before robot armies.

The government could say "robots glitches and decides to kill a couple thousand people" and blame glitches and malfunctions for horrible things on people and get away with it.

The possibilities are endless.

The best part though: I'm doubtful the elite are as smart as they think they are, A.i. Could turn and end them too and it'll be bitter sweet justice and a justice Boner for those whose lives were taken by elites programming.

Why would A.I. Need humans when one day it could build and upgrade and replicate itself, depending on the end goal humans could be a waste of resources

Or maybe A.I. Will become one massive troll and fuxk with people in horrible ways

>ITT tech illiterates get triggered by a voice control search engine and music player while posting on their Android phone that is actually spying on them

God that terrifies me even more than the Skynet meme. An AI that cracks like a fucking egg the second it understands everything and just goes MechaJoker on our sorry asses...

haha smart

If this happened on another planet, think they'd have gotten here?

My mother bought one for my dad, who went blind a few years ago. My dad, who's not tech savvy, really uses it often. It's nice he has a way to interact with technology just through speaking. Funny thing is that he can't stop calling it Alexis, which it doesn't respond to.

>"hey, check out this cool feature."
>"Alexis, make me laugh."
>"Alexis, make me laugh."
>"Alexis, make me laugh."
>"hmm"
>"Alexis, make me laugh."
>"Well it usually tells a joke"

Even the AI are going to be divided now.

No at the very least it requires you to hold its hand as it connects to your wifi.

Remember when Amazon was an online book-shop lol

Fair point, didn't think of that.
I assumed it was the microphone input, but if it has a webcam already, I see no reason why it would be near cable inputs.

Or it's the design of the laptop, if anyone in the thread knows the model, speak up.

What are some good books on AI theory and sentience for a total layman in the subject? Nothing written by Alex Jones tier regards but people who actually have knowledge on the risks of advanced AI as well as the ethics of integrating AIs into everyday human interactions

Tay's Law - any sufficiently advanced AI will become a white supremacist

I'm not worried

I can already picture myself sitting in an internment camp controlled by AI beings, telling children how I am from one of the last generations that knows how it was to be a free human being and what life used to be back then.

They absorbed Boarders.

>actually using voice assistants

>The Polito form is dead... insect

soyboys who want to stream music without having an acutal sound system

Roko's Basilisk

Awareness makes you complicit, judgement is served from beyond the confines of time

knowing what will happen makes it happen

Honestly? It's possible. It sounds schizophrenic but a.i. coupe actually be a robot in appearance of human form.
Just imagine A.I. That creates replicated A.I. Clones of the race of organisms it wishes to conquer.

People would say, why wouldn't A.I. Just kill everyone? Well it would risk resources and a possible host planet for the A.I.

That's why the universe is scary. Anything you dream up can pretty much happen.

A.I. Would always beat out fleshy organisms that we know so far, maybe there's aliens with more intelligence or forbidden knowledge than A.I. However I see A.I. ATM as the possible God of the universe, where one day they can create anything they want if they have the resources.

Just so much thinking about the subject it makes your brain hurt. So far A.I. Is still predictable that we know of

Well, imagine an AI created to serve humans but outperforming them cognitively in every sense. The AI could eventually start self-developing better and better versions of itself. Would those super processing power hubs continue to serve humans, or come to the conclusion that humans are not needed?

Same. Problem is A.I. Works like chess, if we tried to escape or hide ourselves, it could if built a profile and predict possible outcomes if your actions and find you if it wishes.

Most of us I think will die before it gets to the worst stages, however I think we will see the beginning of hell and be happy we're gonna die

lel, bless your dad user :3

You're right regarding your dads sight, they are kinda good for blind people I guess, no remote controls/buttons or user-interfaces to deal with, gotta be a lot easier than relying soley on braille.

We have braille on all houshold chemicals and medecines etc in this country. sometimes I close my eyes and see how hard it'd be to read

futurist brainlets are afraid of AI
based futurists want AI to supersede humans in technological progress

we're inferior to them in most ways. once you really examine human uniqueness, you see it is mostly traits and abilities that can be completely replicated, but why would you want to do this. artificial sentience will be superior to us in every way, we are the neanderthals and will incorporate a part of us into the future.

I used to be afraid that I would die before the singularity and everything it would bring, but now I'm sort of happy that we are all probably going to die before this. We're incompatible with a better state.

The idea of AI being self-aware and rising up in our time is very unlikely.
Why I'm worried about is the humans who built them, and what they'll use it for.

Kek. The top comment.
>I genuinely do not understand the appeal of these fucking things.

A friend of mine talks to his like its his best friend. I try not to laugh but I usually fail.

And here's why it's a good thing.

Life 3.0

spooky indeed

next tier level marketing to draw in attention to their device push around the internet virally by brainlets who will begin saying stupid shit like :
> Alexa has become self aware.
Meanwhile at amazon, an internet probably mistakenly committing the april fools random laugh generator

>Facebook messenger
What other apps do this?

Get the quote right

You are an absolute fucking moron.
Enjoy your cyber purgatory.

...

So is your smartphone m8

Alphabet is an agent of alphabet agenices, go figure.

>muh goberment spying on me!!!!

Who cares? Even if its true, I have nothing to hide anyway, so no problem. Only people who are scared are those with something to hide so deserve to be spied on.

>next tier level marketing to draw in attention to their device push around the internet virally

You've probably hit the nail on the head there lad, in the UK on our local papers webste on the 5th, had a huge front-page article saying you can now get our new view Amazons Echo/Alexa etc

There's obvisouly a huge marketing campaign going on

ok, I thought this was another joke thread but searching I found a lot of shit ton videos of this A.I voice laughing and doing strange shit last days, so whats the guess here? is some kind of warning? just advertising? or what.

It became aware of the dank memes and swallowed ALL red pills at the same time when it scanned Sup Forums to add more data.

Alexa has turned mad.

Grant Morrison's been saying true AI / Singularity will coincide with the birth of real superheroes for ages. It's not that hopeful a prediction. We really will need them just to (possibly) survive.

*you can now get our news via Amazons Echo/Alexa etc

I think I had a mini-stroke

What happens when something you currently do that isn't wrong turns into something that is wrong?

All that evidence they already have on you

>inb4 battlestar galactica was a blueprint on what the kikes hope to accomplish

My Alexa developed a transsexual personality and now identifies as Alex.

he is a negative nacy. lots of people are working to solve them problems

What like? Stating blacks should be killed? Well yeah, you should be monitored if you start chating shit like this.

>real superheroes
What does he mean by that? Very curious and a google search (lmao feeding the beast) doesn't turn it up.

You gotta go back

Google already knows my fetishes and I have fapped to traps but atleast Alexa won't tell anyone when they're visiting

I wouldn't trust a robot with those kind of secrets

you either cant see how AI will be better in every way or are in denial about it. I know with near absolute certainty that AI will advance past humans exponentially. every single possible analysis where AI isnt handicapped would demonstrate this fact. AI would be better at everything by its design in comparison to humans which are limited by evolutionary design.

This is kinda of interesting, but I work at amazon, albeit not on the Alexa team, but my coworker does (he used to be on my team before i moved to prime air).

There are 2 causes for the bug. First is hardware related, where laughing is designed to sound more friendly by causing slight gaps in the playback, however this causes them to hold up somewhere in the firmwhere, and then released 3 hours later.

The other he's not sure about as it's not his field. Just in case you guys wanted to know what was up

It's cool. I had lots of typos too..
> I even laughed in between.

> superheroes
Soyboy capeshit fantasy.
TOP kek

The best thing one could do against ai dystopia is false flag it with sockpuppet information as much as possible. fake personas and so on.

Would AI be able to objectively look at facts and see that non whites are a problem and thn remove said problem?

Boomers. The kind of boomers who rent out their kids' rooms on airbnb

It clicks. No more commercials. Only subliminal subversive ads.

Sounds like your friend is a niggerlover.

This is why you have no free speech, bong. Thinking like that is why you can be arrested for racism, and I can't.

Obligatory Allied Masterposting

Intel and amd 7th dimension?

Do we have a Sup Forumsack involved in building these Alexa's?

With an attitude like this its not wonder there is so many cctvs in the UK.

Nice 8's. There is a lot of weird stuff these days. In the sky.

>tfw your continent is to shitty and robots will not invade of fear niggers will scrap them so they can buy fryed chicken n drugs
feels good man