Another year

Another year
Another Christmas cake thread

I would like to thank the kind user who recomended Momoiro Daydream some weeks ago. Thanks a lot, mate.

Is that Goro Akechi??

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How sweet.

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>tfw getting old enough to the point where cakes are just women my age

Cake buffet is now open. Extra melons, per popular request.

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>tfw getting old enough that I’ll be a christmas cake in four months

It's okay user, we're all going to make it

men, gays and trans can't be christmas cake. It's a term literally made for women born with vagina.

>old enough that christmas cakes are considered young girls

There's literally nothing wrong with christmas cakes though.

Silly user, you know that we are all little girls here.

First chapter is out.

I hope you guys know a single, attractive women in their late 20s and 30s doesn't actually exist. By 30 some loser with a half decent job would have swooped by and picked her up already

But user, you could be that loser with a half decent job.

Bingo square: people bringing up 3DPD.

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The "prime age" for men tends to be 18-35, hurray for being born a male, too bad we get erectile dysfunction and gastrointestinal issues

But I am a woman

This is why you gotta hang around schools when you want to find single, attractive girls

What went wrong user?

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>woman
>unable to find a single man before age 26 in a society where men are forced to make the initiative and women only have to not be obese to have market value
How did you do it?

>women only have to not be obese to have market value
user that's not even true, there are guys who go after that too.

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Had a two sister and mom japanese family buy things at my used goods store. Literally the first happy random encounter I experienced this year.

>Ni~san

So, did you like the After 20 chapter?
>that pun

Not her but it's not a matter of being 'unable' to find someone, it's a matter of not wanting it bad enough (to settle, to actively search for someone, to improve yourself enough to get the sort of person you want, etc).

And it's easy not to want it that badly, you really overestimate how depressing being single over 25 is. That's part of the fantasy for cakes but it doesn't reflect reality.

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At what age do women get the "wake up call" from their biological clocks then?
>during menopause

gib saus pls

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Weird seeing my own crop posted here.

Alright anons, how would you introduce the cake to your parents?

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>You'll never have parents from vanilla japanese porn

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Damn right I did, I hope it stays with that small bit of sadness about not being to meet your friends when you want.

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What's your favorite h-manga that has christmas cakes?

Dad's Lover for sure.

And yes, she's a cake. Read it.

Unf. I remember that. Cute shit.

Also can't go wrong with a qt old car mechanic.

Based Kaede

>full censorship

>35
>half decent job
>still kissless virgin

dont lie to me bro

I haven't seen a single decent looking cake in real life

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Still the best cake.

>claiming to soon become a christmas cake
Alright user, you know the rules.
>tits
or
>gtfo

>my fetish is becoming a fad
Fuck off homos.

Socially? Depends, may never happen in this day and age where you're not basically expected to be housewife by default. When they actually go into full panic mode but don't necessarily realize WHY? Their 30s.

>dat feel have a friend who's 36
>still not married and no children
>wants to hang out with me
>mfw

I know several.

As an user in his 40s, there are plenty of single, attractive women in their 30s wondering about. They fall mainly into 3 categories:

1. Those that chose to focus on career and are now desperate to start a family before they expire

2. Those with self-esteem issues that have bounced from one relationship to another and again, now feel the need to settle down

3. Divorcees with no kids who regret it now.

Erectile dysfunction is an invention to push meds. You can get your dick working unless you have some serious health issues

>be in your 40s
>have money to burn

why would you even settle for 30 year olds? men in their 40s fuck around with women in their 20s.

>cake thread
>suddenly incest posting
>again
i wonder who started doing this

Are you the fat bald man from my doujins?

It's possible if the girl is extremely socially retarded and scared shitless of intimacy.

;_;

>i turn 25 in twenty days
jesus christ

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What happens to a woman when she hits 30 still a virgin?

She becomes a witch.

20yr olds are a fucking awful. You might as well spring for a hooker. It would be cheaper and more fulfilling. You either fuck a teenager or settle down with someone in her late 20s when she's gotten all the whoring out of her system.

I turned 25 9 years ago. Cakes are like little babies.

Eh, that's fine. Something to look forward to, I guess. Always did want to go to Hogwarts.

>be 35
>cakes look adorable as fuck to me
bonus points if they're socially awkward

>20yrs old are a fucking awful
>You either fuck a teenager
Are you retarded? Teenagers are the fucking worst, it's literally the peak retardness a human being has.

>tfw not taken seriously by cakes

Damn user, had to do a google search to check that this was not edited

I didn't say form a meaningful bond. I said Fuck. A teenager is just getting started on her whoring, willing to try new things. A woman in her 20s knows just enough whoring to cocktease and bleed you dry while she hops onto bigger and better dicks. She doesn't need to be interesting or sympathetic, she just needs to watch her figure, which is easy at that age. By her 30s, she either has all her whoring out of her system and realises the her diminishing value well enough to play nice or else she's beyond redemption. A Cake in her 30s knows she's on the clock and she better be not just be fit (something she need to work at) but also Interesting and even better, Pragmatic in her search for Mr Okay-ish. Even ugly fat fucks are able to bag themselves an attractive and devoted Cake if they are not complete retards..

Are there really that many cakes going around? Are you in a 3rd world cesspool by any chance?

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There are. I know one cake, she spends all her time at work. And almost all her friends are also females above 25 who work too much to form connections with a guy.

Сука блять here. Was bored and decided to translate this. No proofreading or anything like that.
0. Now, in gonna tell you a scary story...
Your stores are neither true nor scary.
1. There was an OP. Once his neighbor called and asked to fix her PC.
And she invited him on the 25th of December.
Unsuspecting OP agreed to help and arrived at a given date.
2. When the door opened, OP saw his neighbour wearing festive dress.
"She's waiting for her guests and here I am, came to help with her PC" thought OP.
3. But the neighbour was alone. She was happy to see this boy and invited him to sit at her table, to eat and drink. OP shyly agreed...
4. They ate.
Then they drank.
They drank again.
And again.
5. Later the neighbour turned the lights down and invited OP to dance.
OP was a bad dancer and all he could do is to move to the rhythm of spaghetti falling from his pockets.
6. While OP was still waiting to help, they were actively conversing and suddenly OP said:
"Do you know who Christmas cakes are?"
"No, who are they?" the girl asked.
7. When the girl heard who Christmas cakes are, she quickly drawn an analogy.
You could read different emotions in her face, slight anger being one of them.
Suddenly, she stood up and pushed OP against her sofa.
8. At this moment the boy understood that this neighbour wasn't angry at all.
She smiled and pressed her breasts against OP's head.
9. Then she slowly pulled his shirt up and...
10. OP was never heard of again.

Who's that smug hottie?

Hoqwarts isn't real. Witches are.

Nah. Though I suspect it happens all over the place user. Western Society has forever been focused on furthering education whenever possible. Back when we still had a large middle class pool, parents sent their daughters to College rather than marrying them off. So they ended up in the executive world. The smart ones climbed the ladder while the average ones just used it as a means to obtain disposable income while they still had parents to bounce back on as a safety net. The point is, they had plenty of reasons to Not have to pursue a long-term relationship or else held themselves to ridiculous standards, looking for rich, smart, handsome men to put up with their bullshit. Most manage to find someone acceptable along the way, but the pickiest ones just end up fucking around (literally) until they reach their 30s and find that living with roommates and being a bridesmaid to their fucking younger sisters is not what they saw themselves doing at that age. That's where the desperation kicks in and standards start tumbling down. And every year on, they start settling for less and less until you see the attractive, stuck-up bitches who didn't give you a second look in their 20s suddenly warming up to you simply because you have a job and you know basic hygiene and are not a total social wreck.

And don't get me started on women in their 40s. That's like seriously desperate territory. That cake is no longer even advertising, they're practically telegraphing their desperation, especially if they've not risen higher than middle management by then.

Tranny doesn't count.

Cakes deserve their suffering for not accepting my love back in highschool/college. Eat shit old hags.

god fucking damn it the last line

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Lol it's ridiculous to think women of any age would find difficulty finding men. Less women are born than men. Do the math you retards.

That strong independent woman is obviously so much more happier than the slut making out on the metro.
Cease this bigoted propaganda or you shall be reported for hate speech according to the new EU laws.

Why though

Man, if your white is somehow turning into red something has gone seriously wrong.

You sound like a real charmer
They really missed out

So both are better after 20 years ok

Oh, you sweet child. This isn't about women not being able to find a man. It's about women choosing not to due to many factors (societal pressure, evolving values, rising income, education standards, etc.). There are plenty of women in their 30s who find themselves staring at the abyss and realise they no longer know how find someone dependable when all the ideal partners are already taken. It happens a lot more than you think. Next time, look around at office women and check for wedding rings. You'll be surprised how many that you'd think would be married are not. And don't give me that 'in a relationship' bullshit. If you're still playing the boyfriend/girlfriend game in your 30s, you fucking failed at life.

You know, this reminds me of Fan no Hitori's doll series.

Would she be happier being selected for the..mandatory "social service"?

>white people

idk why it took me so long to understand