What is it about Shirou that makes nearly every single woman he comes in contact want his meat saber?

What is it about Shirou that makes nearly every single woman he comes in contact want his meat saber?

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He's the MC.

He can cook, fuck, and has lots of money.

Please tell me Illya is included

What the fuck is that font

Let's count.
1. He's /fit/ as fuck
2. He's up early and extremely active
3. He lives in a mansion with lots of cash yet works diligently at a part time job anyway
4. He has unique magical powers
5. He desperately needs SOMEONE to emotionally anchor him to prevent him from going wildly off the deep end becoming a machine that enacts "justice" (big one here: everyone likes feeling necessary)
6. He's got strong ties to the local yakuza boss
7. He cooks like a king's royal chef
8. More than anyone else you know he will give his life to protect others
9. He has a pretty big dick

Nice list, user. Make one for why so many guys like Sakura.

He's the main character author self-insert in a poorly written piece of fiction.

Power of the high jump.
Not as strong as the Tohno Gland though.

1. Slut who will put out.

>9. He has a pretty big dick
Either this is a lie or Sakura is really loose.

1. She's a close friend and ally to the main character
2. She's a target for a savior, a common male ideal to rescue the injured or helpless
3. She has exotic hair and eye colors
4. She demonstrates a strong loyalty even during a painful psychological tantrum
5. She can cook essentially as well as Shirou (better at western style dishes, worse at japanese)
6. She holds great magical power that is also described in-setting as very rare
7. She has large breasts

Now which of those things do you think Occam's Razor shaves down?

do you not know about the high jump

I always like how he wanted to help everyone with tedious work, just for the sake of helping them.

Bitches love high-jumps.

>want his meat saber
>Illya

>forgetting the high jump

Well maybe it's because shirou is the perfect husbando?

- He's healthy, attractive and ripped as fuck
- He's finacially independent despite being a teenager
- He lives in a very large house
- He's empathetic and sociable
- He's competent and very conscientious (the first thing he thinks of after dying, being revived and regaining consciousness in his own blood puddle is to clean it up)
- Him being self-sacrificing is one of his defining characteristics and bitches love men who do shit for them
- All of his relatives are dead so he isn't tied to anyone
- He's a great cook and he probably has a great cock

Chad Archer > Manlet Shirou

>every single woman
Rin and Sakura saw him jumping a bar and Saber fell for his autism and cooking. That's not really every single woman though

Just being MC and Japanese men so afraid of cucking there aren't be other competition anywhere.

I am starting to see why people were saying they hated Shirou a few weeks ago now.

This.

youtube.com/watch?v=NagzD3vgGJk

>2008
I miss the time before Nu-Fate

>posting shitty ArbynChief rip offs

Fate route Shirou is objectively the worst

>shirou
>lives happy and fulfilled life, follows his principles and is a proper man

>archer
>whiny bitch who spends his days brooding and sulking, betrays everything he stood for and acts like a slimy scumbag

Saber? Rin?

Well there was this one time after school where I saw him practicing the high jump....

Some guys have it, some guys don't. Simple as that.

Saber's my favorite but it's just wrong to try and convince her not to go back and help her people.
What sort of person would I be if I allowed her to stay and see her nation destroyed in order to be together
Not like there isn't a steady supply of viable girls begging for it either.

Shirou have 3 girls after his dick. That's pretty standard for vn mc. This guy on the other hand is literal chick magnet

Man that show was good
shame the new season isn't that great but I suppose that well is dry
>as you post a pic with one of Shirou's pseudo bitches
Mikiya is the true harem king anyway

He wants to be a hero, and everyone like heroes.

I would say mary sue but it's pretty wrong. Most men are manchildren. Women love self sufficient men who can cook and live alone. Especially at a young age. He is also active in a club and not a drama queen. Willing to help others out without making a big fuss. It helps he is not ugly.

>Saber raised as a male and was King
>has a famous sword
>Shirou is her sheath
I don't like where this is going.

Blame Merlin.

>as you post a pic with one of Shirou's pseudo bitches
That's the thing. From what we see in All Around Type moon drama cd and manga she's now stalking Shiki. He's stealing girls from other series and he even got robots in his harem

...

Saber is absolutely not a woman but she's not a man either.

Not even Archer likes Archer.

Gonna need some proof for that last one.

I'd be okay with that on the condition me and Saber double team Tohsaka regularly..

She's probably like that.

I hope Saber's isn't bigger then Shirou's, that'd be pretty awkward

...

>leaving out the high jump

>watching Deen stay night in 2018
Dumb secondary

I don't care, keep crying spergs.

He can cook.

...

It has the best OST of any Fate work, and probably the best in Type Moon in general except for KnK or Melty Blood. Also best character design and some honestly good scenes. Saber's summoning is better done in DEEN then Ufotable's attempt.

>Saber
>Fertile
>Sakura
>Fertile

Sakura has the genes of Aoi whose womb was noted to be bountiful, was taken in by Zouken because he intended for her to bear Matou children at first, is repeatedly compared to mother goddesses like Parvati and Hariti in Nasu interviews, and the entire fucking plot of HF revolves around blatant symbolism for her being pregnant with Angra Mainyu.

You were saying?

>implying

literal slut

Disgusting

My King can't possibly be this cute!

>King
I didn't vote for you.

Probably because the Britons get wrecked and mostly replaced by Anglo-saxons and Gaelic fucks regardless of if she goes back in time to die or stays in the present sucking off a Japanese magical ginger with PTSD.

>Nasu: Matou Sakura, pure kouhai-type heroine
>Parvati: On this occasion, I was summoned into the body of a pure young girl

none of this matters because it's made a point that everyone who saw his high jump fell in love with him.

Why doesn't she use the holy grail to win the war instead of just changing who was king?

The conquest and displacement of the Britons took place over several centuries, long after Saber died.

Why couldn't she just ask the grail to kill all of the people who would invade instead of trying to redo her life?

I bet Illya is warm and smells really good.

Yeah, pretty sure it's the latter what with the worms and all.

It's tight.

Phantasm illya is the best illya

"Tightens" literally implies that it was loose previously.

And that it becomes tight, making it the perfect vagina. Easy to put it in, nice and tight once the actual sex starts.

what exactly is the appeal of sakura?

He's in a harem setting, harem masters by default have impossible pussy wetting powers that makes most women around him instantly love him.

IT'S THE FUCKING HIGH JUMP. IT'S ALWAYS BEEN THE FUCKING HIGH JUMP. IT WILL ALWAYS BE THE FUCKING HIGH JUMP.

Shirou has mad ups.

She's a perfect housewife, has huge tits, an adorably shy yet energetic personality, will stay loyal to you forever, and is all in all a pure and kind angel.

I'm a guy and he appeals to ME. What's stopping the girls from slobbering all over him? Forget the others. Shirou is the best marriage candidate amongst ALL the characters in the Visual Novel.

That's gay though.

What does she have to offer in contrast to Rin and Saber?

What's the best release for the TV series

user...

Not pure after all the worms, but you are right about everything else

Not him but I have the OPA release and it seemed fine.

This. Wanting to marry Shirou is the most logical conclusion you could come to after reading the VN
No homo though

Post your Type Moon waifu

Saber
>Cant cook
>Cant do any household work
>Timid
>Disloyal if you dont benefit her

Rin
>Cant cook or do chores
>Cheap
>Tsundere

>Saber and Rin both have dicks now
>can't even get them pregnant anymore
>both of them have dicks
no thanks
I'll still cuddle with Saber though her being little spoon of course.

>Rin can't cook or do chores
She rivals Shirou in Chinese cuisine and maintains a mansion by herself

give me the SAUCE
Looking futa rin tags on panda gives me that weird dojuin series where she's constantly fucked with by tentacles- good shit but not that image

Does Saber work in FHA?

No.
There's even a scene where she gets bullied for being a worthless NEET

Yeah, but Chinese food isn't fit for everyday consumption.

>Chinese
Like I said, Rin cant cook for shit

...

What the fuck do you think Chinese people eat?

Rin is just utter wish fulfillment. Bitch that bends over because she recognizes superiority. She's got a ton of money. She's a slut. The fact she's selfless too helps.

...

Rin vs Mashu vs Medea Lily vs Cu

I need the sauce to that...