Look, if you can dodge every attack from every boss in Dark Souls just by rolling, something every fairly fit person can do with ease, I see no reason why a fairly fit person couldn't kill a horse with nothing more than some brass knuckles. Think about it: bosses in Dark Souls have decent AI and tracking abilities - once you learn their moves, they become a very doable challenge. A horse is much dumber than a boss and they aren't even aggressive when you first see them, so the first few hits are free while it's stunned at the fact that you're punching it in the face, and we already know the limits of horses and their movesets, so they can't really pull any AoE surprises. The only difference is you can't parry them, but even then, most bosses can't be parried.
Prove me wrong and explain why I can't beat up a horse. Oh wait, you can't.
Sure you probably could KO a horse if she had her guard down, but could you stop a charging horse with just fists? Maybe could get a hit in but the horse's momentum would definitely knock the fuck out of you.
Nicholas Flores
Guy who worked on a horse ranch here. Horses are assholes, they are the wasps of livestock. They exists only to fuck up your day. Do not ever, ever, ever go behind one because its just waiting for its chance to kick your brains out of your ear. And be fucking quick with your hands because the fuckers bite and they bite hard. They bite like they are trying to get a god damn chunk of your flesh.
If you're a human and you think you can 1 v 1 a horse. Just stay the fuck away it doesn't end well for you
Ian Carter
No, you would roll out of the way, like you would for any charging attack. The horse can't turn on a dime, so you'd have a couple seconds to get some cheap hits in, then roll away in preparation for the next attack.
Hunter Robinson
Depends on the species of horse and your fitness level
You might be able to sucker punch a small horse and knock it out, but it's not very likely even then. A horse would probably just run away from you before you could knock it out.
Jaxon Bell
You're assuming I'd try some idiotic tactics like going directly behind the horse. Dark Souls bosses consistently punish you for going directly behind them - the secret is to stay on their side and strafe them. A horse would be especially vulnerable to this strategy.
Adam Anderson
How do you plan to deal with the fact that it can just zone you out all day and never engage
Josiah Peterson
FUCKING THANK YOU. I grew up on a horse farm and they're fucking awful beasts. Surprisingly fragile though. Like feed them buttercups, or let them drink a little too much. They'll fucking die easy with that. I work with a few bitches who are like "OH I LOVE HORSES" "Really, have you worked with them?" "No but they're beautiful and gentle." FUCK THEM ALL.
Nolan Wright
I can aggro it by kicking dirt in its face.
Isaiah Howard
The real questions still need to be answered.
What are your stats (you fit?), are you going out there with any protective items, what kind of boss arena are you fighting the horse on (a bridge or hallway and your fucked), do you have any items that impact I-frames or distance on your roll?
Brandon Ramirez
>Kick dirt in its face >It gallops away and stays out of your range >Any time you try to get closer it just stay out of your range
Now what? Think you can out run a fucking Mustang?
Wyatt Lopez
If I have a high enough Charisma or Deception can I seduce the horse?
Joseph Wood
They aren't the fastest in turning speed, but they also don't have to do a full stop just to turn. You won't be able to catch the fucker. Assuming you both would be outside with a wide arena, the horse could just try to trample you over and over until you get tired of evading attacks.
Nathan Rogers
I kinda want to see OP fight a horse.
Josiah Miller
>Dark Souls bosses consistently punish you for going directly behind them >what is stray demon
Connor Rodriguez
Could a knight take down an angry horse?
Actually, I don't know shit about horses, could a pro boxer feasibly knock one out with brass knuckles if they had a free hit?
Brandon Lopez
>punch a horse in the face Have you even felt how solid a horse's bones are? A punch isn't gonna do much but piss it off. Enjoy having a hoof rammed through your skull
Thomas Cruz
Thank you OP, I need it this thread. I sure think you can a beat a horse with the right tactics, but how bout 2 horses?
Ian Martin
It shouldn't be too hard to level up fast enough to beat up a horse I don't think. You could just go in the barnyard and start killing level 1 chicks, then level 3 chickens and work your way up.
Jordan Rodriguez
>explain why I can't beat up a horse. Because you're morbidly obese
Caleb Price
Holy shit, I'm laughing so hard at this retarded thread. Thanks OP, I needed that, had a shitty day.
Ayden Jones
Pretty sure a boxer like mike tyson could do it.
Cameron Collins
I would assume, given the advantage of surprise you might be able to choke a horse but it'd be difficult. Punching a horse's skull would be like punching a rock though.
Lucas Clark
Someone post that webm where a deer kicks the shit out of a dog.
Logan Miller
a knight with a sword could 1 shot the sucker while it runs past
a fighter maybe if it was young rampage or chuck liddel and knuckles
Jaxon Foster
Negative. Most boxers are trained for sniffing out a weakpoint then peppering it. Few of them can deliver a one punch knock out. You'd need a Bruce Lee tier one inch punch to break down a horse in one blow
Anyway, you should go for the knee. If you can injure its leg, the fucker is at your mercy
Samuel Young
Yes, but can you defeat a bull using the same tactic once you practiced enough on horses?
Brass knuckles only, final destination.
Matthew White
This guy gets it, just punch the shit out of one its knees. It has four of glaring weak spots, shouldn't be too hard to take out one.
Blake Howard
Deer are fucking scary man. You can never tell when they're just gonna flip the fuck out likes spergs and then you're gonna be the faggot that got killed by bambi
Angel Nelson
Brass knuckles were mentioned. I think that would even things out.
Jackson Lewis
Animals are pretty good at reacting. I tried petting my Cockatiel and it would lash out like a viper in millisecond it saw you coming.
Now imagine that with something that could actually kill you.
Liam Ross
Can an adult male in peak physical condition with a baseball bat 1v1 a deer?
They just charge forward man, you just have to jump over it or roll.
Eli Ortiz
Has anyone here ever been around a horse? The horse doesn't want to fight you. The horse is a huge fucking pussy and it will dart off at the first sign of confrontation.
Samuel Stewart
>Brass Knuckles
If we're giving OP brass knuckles we have to give the horse brass knuckles in the interest of fairness.
Juan Green
Yes you can stop a horse with a punch to the head my dad did it once
Leo Gutierrez
Don't horse shoes count? I'd imagine they make getting kicked by a horse significantly worse.
Adrian Kelly
what if instead of a horse is a pony?
Elijah Bailey
>31 replies and 2 images omitted. Click here to view. >none of you retards are saging This is why sage belongs in the email field, so that newfriends can learn.
Owen Johnson
Italians have gotta be pretty stupid to think antagonizing a bull is a good idea.
Luke Cox
brass hooves
Josiah Smith
>Dark Souls I play MonHun. Great Sword user. Pretty sure by comparison a horse would be a joke
Caleb King
You get to pick if you want to be the dude in the bottom right, or any of the guys getting gored in the nuts. Think fast, a bull is charging at you.
Matthew Butler
leave those poor horses alone man, jeez! you guys are ILL
Justin Rodriguez
i kind of doubt this though, a proffessional boxer could probably punch the horse hard enough to knock it out since he would have the element of surprise because on a clean hit those fuckers can hit devastatingly hard.
Isaac Torres
maybe, but you would have a problem even getting close to it to punch it. A horse would just run away if it sees you and a horse has a 360 degree field of vision, and an acute sense of hearing. They also have faster reflexes than a cat
Owen Miller
Dont call your mom like that
Alexander Wilson
Best thread on Sup Forums currently you faggot, go ahead and return to your 19th overwatch thread though
Evan Long
>italians >bullfighters
Grayson Anderson
>Do not ever, ever, ever go behind one then how am I supposed to have sex with it?
Jose Lee
>Italians How do you not know it's the Spanish
Josiah Cruz
>beating up a horse What the actual fuck is wrong with you op?
Nolan Mitchell
Spain, Sorry.
Still, Spics are just as stupid.
Jose Mitchell
>email field user give it up, it's gone, everything is gone. i've given up on Sup Forums and for your own sake you should too.
Logan Reyes
you could just follow it until it is too exhausted to move and punch it's head in
Liam Wright
You have sex with the sheep, they will faint on you before fighting back.
Joseph Ortiz
That guy is being gored through the head AND sodomized, isn't he?
Eli Gomez
holy shit i just saw this thread the other day. I hadnt seen any documentaries in a while and only now realize how fucking right it was about american ones.
the constant dubbed in horse screeches were fucking ridiculously awful
but ya dam a horse can fuk u up
Camden Myers
Yeah, I think I've basically proven that I could beat up one horse, but this is an interesting question. Could I beat a Horsestein and Neigh? Probably, but it would depend on what happens when I kill one of them. Does the other get angry at the death of its horse friend and become more aggressive? If so, that could pose a problem.
Gavin Rodriguez
well that's basically how early humans hunted so I guess it would work.
Matthew Price
Guys some horses are assholes but pls don't bully them there are some really sweet breeds
>Prove me wrong and explain why I can't beat up a horse.
Your right, I can't, go do it!
Aiden Rogers
...
Aaron Williams
Only way i could feasibly kill a horse with my bare hands is to make it choke on my arm like that one guy did to kill a bear with no weapons. Get on its back, hold on for dear life with one arm and stick your arm in its mouth.
Either that or try to make it fuck its legs up on something
Xavier Brooks
How... do you train a horse to just throw itself like that?
Jackson Hall
is it true that if you ride a horse hard and don't cool it down properly it will die?
Charles Jackson
...
Henry Davis
But could you beat up a coyote?
John Cruz
It was real. Animals were killed in that movie.
William Edwards
If you got a really clean kick at it's knee you could probably break it or dislocate it which basically is a death sentence for a horse.
Hudson Ramirez
>Equinecutioner Neigh Haaaaaaaa.
Bentley Martinez
OP, I think you COULD kill the horse, but why? Why not convinced it to join you instead?
Liam Rodriguez
You can't just defeat every wildlife by rolling.
Ian Lewis
fight it like this fucker
Tyler Brooks
>Can an adult male in peak physical condition with a baseball bat 1v1 a deer? I really wouldn't want to try, its an animal with almost as much strength as a horse. This is why we have guns.
Christopher Gonzalez
The thing is that the youtube video linked isn't from an american documentary, it's from a shitty show called "most shocking", not to discount the fact that american releases of documentaries are fucking embarrassing. I still feel 3rd hand anger for David Attenborough for all the great narration he's done that gets dubbed over because American cable networks thinks we're too retarded to understand what he's saying.
Christopher Johnson
I don't think I could beat up this horse.
Eli Davis
>needing a gun pussy
Jose Murphy
Horses are too stupid to join pacts. If I kill it, I get Soul of a Horse, and Horseshoe x4. This is really a no-brainer.
Leo Russell
>sage belongs in the email field there is no email field, I miss it. I also miss visible sage.
>someone makes a thread begging for a dota 2 beta invite >sure I've got one, just send me an email >they mouse over your name to see your email >mailto:sage >:^)
Jack Green
Thats because that horse is shit senpai beside Miia is better
Easton Baker
>dubbing english with english
Honestly?
Robert Powell
Horses don't understand English.
You fuck.
Christopher Clark
Neigh you couldn't.
William Gutierrez
I'd her horse, if you know what I mean.
Lincoln Fisher
You realize that worked with weapons right? An animal that's 10 times your weight will still have the advantage whether it's tired or not
