ITT: Rules you plan to set for your kids

ITT: Rules you plan to set for your kids

1. You may only play Vidya after you finish your homework.
2. Any vidya must be age appropriate unless parent supervised
3. You will only recieve vidya on designated occasions such as christmas and birthday from me, if you want money, you'll work up an allowance, no if ands or buts
4. Your first Videogame will be Mega man 2. This is non negotiable and you will beat it before you are allowed anything else.
5. There will be no Sonic the hedgehog in this household. You will be disowned if I ever catch you with anything of that furry Antichrist.

I'm not buying my kids video games or any electronic device until they're at least over 12.

This

Video games fucked my life up, why would I do that to my kids?

>kids

Hopefully by then video games will be dead so my child doesn't grow up with a useless hobby

Way to make your children hate an otherwise passable game, and probably the entire franchise along with it.

>kids

i prefer money and free time

Forcing them to play your favorite game is stupid.
It won't help give them good taste.
Give them a range of solid games to pick from.
Let them choose what they like from a curated list.
Then, they aren't just drones following your dumb ass...

My children can be gay.
My children can be homocidal maniacs
My children can even be SJW supporting liberals...

BUT MY CHILDREN WILL NOT BE CASUAL SCUM

not video games

you sound like a horrible parent

Just get them into speedrunning, then.

>Sonic
>Mega man

>Not vidya

You got corn in your ears?

>no Sonic The Hedgehog

>ears
boi I sure do love listening to Sup Forums!

>Implying I will have kids

My daughterfu will never touch vidya I will tell her to pick up tennis or some refined sport

>That terrifying realization when the previous generation of parents forcing their kids to be successes and follow their careers to keep up their image, is now applicable to "Gamers" and their Gamer cred

>kids
Enjoy JUSTing yourself.

>all those Sup Forumsirgins implying they'll ever get a kid
TOP FUCKING KEK

>Dads wall of trophies and accolades is a picture frame with printed screenshots of Xbox and Steam achievements

>age appropiate

Thanks to That i ended up bieng the least popular kid in shool

>couldnt play GTA SA cause muh M
>couldnt play A FUCKING FINAL FANTASY game cause T
>But everyone could

Fuck you op You are a bad parent

>Being exposed to the vulgar shit that goes on in GTA as a kid

Your parents did you a favor. We had enough wannabe rapper gangsters shitting up the streets and getting into trouble.

I will try my hardest to play video games secretly so that my child will never be interested in them. My life was shit until I hit 18 because video games all the time turned me into a lazy sack of shit that never left my bedroom because I was playing video games all the time. Any parent that tries to get their kids to like video games is an absolute shit tier parent that is condemning their child to a life of depression and regret.

You must take at least one extracircular activity, whether that's sports, music, or something else.
If your grades are all B or better, then we can talk vidya.

Nintendo games only, no degenerate trash like witcher cowadoody or whatever

>thinking What happens on a videogame happens irl

Someone call Thompson and Anita

Yeah, I remember I was 9 when FFX came out, and I wasn't allowed to get it because it had animated blood

>Thinking kids arent dumb shits who try to imitate what they see in media

Someone call a psychiatrist for this bozo.

No credit card info for this phone and I'm not buying you that stupid bling-armor. If I catch you making purchases on mine I'll beat your ass.

I had a half brother born when I was 13 and I tried so hard by the time I was 18 or so to not get his parents to let him play video games.

He's 11 now and plays casual bullshit all day every day and is even more of a brat than I was about playing. He also watches and adore's twitch streamers and LP'ers.

I feel bad he's going down the same path I did except at least I still had outdoor activity as a kid since online wasn't a thing yet. He plays 0 sports/instruments and has terrible coordination.

>"Stop playing cod and come shoot real guns in a 3 gun match with daddy"
I can only hope

Bullshit, you would be a lazy fuck even if video games weren't there.

Fucker makes my skin crawl.

This is actually pretty true. I had a few acquaintances growing up that weren't ever allowed to play video games and are even more lazy pieces of shit than me. Except all they do is drink and do drugs.

1. No vidya with autistic writing. People who like Sonic the Hedgehog or Kingdom Hearts were raised on piles of absolute dogshit brain tumor inducing writing. Won't let that happen.

>wanting kids
Nah, I enjoy money, free time, and sex way too much to ruin it with having children.

I'm at that age where all my buddies are settling down and having kids. They always give me shit like I'm gonna fall into the same trap. I can plainly see they're unhappy and just deluding themselves. Nobody wants a 2nd mortgage and to give up every second of free time to either work for money or work to keep your future entitled shit head alive. They try and tell me they're leaving a "legacy" behind or some shit. I just laugh since they don't even know where their great grand parents are even from or who they were. Some legacy, huh?

No particular rules, I just won't be buying him bad games and not anything too gory until at least teens. Even though I was playing GTA before I was ten, nope. Bad =/= popular, in fact, raising a normie who spends couple of hours with his football team in Call of Duty in weekends would be preferable so he could have everything I didn't.

If it's a girl, then she won't be interested in anything beyond phone games herself.

they only get to play JRPGS

>He doesn't put the page on a Microsoft Sam reel and go do something else while it plays

Kids these days don't care about playihng video games. He's just going to watch let's plays on youtube all day.

>Having kids and not adopting one
It's like you would rather have a chance of your child having birth defects or being hedious and not adopting a desirable kid

Aslong as they go outside, do as they're told and do their homework, they can play all they want.

This is what my dad did and it seems like the most reasonable thing.

This kind of Stalinist parenting will cause them to wither hate you or video games. Probably both.
Just make sure they don't play shit games.

>being a genetic cuck
impressive desu

>allowing your children to be SJWs

Yeah, I thought this too

Then I spent my free time drinking, fapping and playing video games. I was wafting in and out from feelings of neutrality to suicidal depression. I couldn't laugh anymore or even enjoy video games. The only time I felt human was when I drank a whole bottle of whiskey and listened to pirate songs on full blast. Then I noticed I need more and more booze to actually get fucked up and that shit costs too much money.

Now I have someone to protect and live for. That's worth 20 cases of booze. Plus, shit's just easier if you have someone on board with you on everything.

Oh, come on, the first Kingdom Hearts game got the whismical Disney vibe mixed with anime just right. After that I don't wanna know about.

>Not being the super cool bro parent that treats their child as an equal and lets them do whatever they want

>Okay son, today we're starting with SMT IV

>2016
>no longer need children to maintain your quality of life (ex: farmer needing sons to help with farm as you age, daughters to marry to other men in order to create business bonds, shit like that)

I'd really love to hear arguments by new parents about why they did what they did. Maybe its because its what everyone has been doing forever, or maybe they feel that they'd "enjoy it," as if having all your money be shovelled into this kid is enjoyable, not to mention to burden of not raising a sociopath or a NEET weabo

And its not like we need to procreate to maintain our fucking civilization either. Population growth is retarded as it is

>There will be no Sonic the hedgehog
At least let him play from 1 through 3 &Knuckles
Those are good games!

>being a fucking faggot dad

Friend's dad did this gay shit when we were growing up. Banned Pokemon cards from entering the house too. Guess who never had anyone who wanted to stay over on the weekends?

>Not starting him on Nocturne
Dante is in it, so you can use that as a gateway into him playing Devil May Cry

That doesn't ever work right

That's why you sneak shit from your folks and get into trouble

You cant visit Sup Forums

I intend to enforce rules 1 and 3 for my children. However, I'm more concerned with social media turning them into narcissistic little shits. Smartphones and apps like Snapchat are poisoning the minds of our youth much more that vidya ever has/will.

Regardless of all these advancements of mobile tech in the future, they won't have a smartphone during their youthful years, they will spend more time outside. They will use a basic flip-phone or touchscreen phone that doesn't use apps, until they are in their final school years before moving onto college/military.
Practically the same will go for anything social media. No Facebook-equivalent usage until they are practically ready for college/military.

This takes you to NEET loser country faster than you can say basement dweller.

1. As long as you get good grades you can do what you want provided it does not hurt you or others. If your grades start slipping I'll crack down on you.

>Not teaching them fightin games
>Not raising the strongest fightin game player ever
Its like you don't want to create a monster, imagine your child starting with all your knowledge and then learning more, its beautiful

If you say so man. Reading that I'd say you replaced one addiction with another, but that's from a brief paragraph here so don't take it too personally. I know people who felt like their kids "saved them" or they had no direction until having kids. For some I'd say that's fine and good. I know some where becoming a born again Christian did the same thing. I think the people who should be parents are people who genuinely want to have and raise kids. They turn into the best parents cuz they love their kid unconditionally which is all a kid needs at the end of the day.

Life has whatever meaning you want for it. If having kids does it for you, cool.

My parents were like that, letting me do and believe whatever i wanted.

There is something to be said for having some sort of direction

You could have just bought a pet a or planted a tree instead of ruining your life with such a burden.

having kids is cool. fun to hang out with when they get around 3 or 4

unfortunatly for you, you will have to get a woman to willingly fuck you atleast once

I'm sure he'll be real intimidated by you once he sees your stash of autistic anime reaction images, fucking weebshit.

Nope. Just rape someone and then go back to them after 9 months, kidnap them, take the child, boom. Free baby.

This. Vidya ruined my grades. I will not allow it to happen to my children.

>Forcing shitty outdated anything on your kid

All the 16 y/o expert parents in here.
Letting your kids do whatever the fuck they want is why we have the degenerate youth of today.

There is literally nothing wrong with the first three rules.

4 and 5 are kind of autistic and weird.

Well, it's that or alienating them in primary school levels. Having a mobile phone is now required for socialising, and absolutely indispensable from high-school on.

They won't have friends if they only know what you allow them to know.

I should have clarified that I meant rules 4 and 5.

If I ever have children I'll just hand em down my super nintendo, if it even works by then and if we still have it around in the family. I actually plan to give it and all the games I've recently accumulated to my nephew when he reaches 5 or 6, whatever my sister deems appropriate. She's really not the kind to let him get on cellphone garbage bullshit too, and she likes the older games anyway. Pretty hyped for him to grow up actually.

>all that shit
the only autist here is you, OP

"Nintendo only"
"No trash"
Pick one or the other faggot.

I've heard lots of reasons but most boil down to: I want to watch a smaller version of me learn and grow up. Essentially, it's ego driven.

>tfw only have a niece
Have fun with your cousin. Make sure he isn't an autistic faggot.

wow. Sup Forums came a long way. Looks like a middle age daddy forum at this point

I don't see myself having kids in the foreseeable future.

This, children are so gross and also make loud obnoxious crying noises

>tfw spic
It's happening whether I want it or not. Might as well prepare for it while I'm ahead.

>can only play vidya after homework
>no smartphones/tablets or youtube on the console
>encourage doing chores to earn an allowance, otherwise you'll only get vidya from christmas/birthdays
>buy/play whatever the fuck game you want
>shit gets taken away if you start slacking off or being a little shithead

I'm sure I'd make a pretty shit parent though.

I don't even think I even have to worry about that myself, sis is fucking hardcore about not raising a little shit. Kid will probably end up twice the man I am.

I'm just here to make sure he has good vidya taste. His father is pretty cool too, I think it's gonna be as much a gift to him as to the kid. Hopefully gaming is going to be a family thing instead of just him developing into an addicted shutoff.

>Tfw I wabt a life companion
>but dont want to throw all my dreams away for a family /marriage

Should I buy an ukrainian sex slave, pat her on the head and try to make her love me?
Or atleast my dick

You can allow kids to have phones without letting them do whatever the fuck they want. Your kids can have social lives without letting them do whatever they want. And having your kid be socially popular =/= good parenting. In fact it usually means the opposite.

When I feel my kid starts to rely too much on hand holding, i'm gonna buy an NES, or at least something that can play nes games, and force him to play battletoads until he beats it, without help. Until then, he's not allowed to go to any friend's house, have any friends over, and I wont get him anything he wants. My kids will need to EARN victory.

1. Video games are stupid play football my wife's son.

Kids don't even like video games anymore. They'd rather watch Markiplier play through a dozen games in a week rather than autistically play the only game your parents got you for your birthday for a year.

I assume by the time I have kids some other new stupid thing will be popular.

Myself and millions of others had rules and we all managed to have friends.
Maybe that is a you problem.

1) I will buy you new games only if you have nothing to play/you dislike the one you have right now/there is something really cool coming out
2) A game must be approved by me before you can buy it, so no GTA at age 8 and other shit like that
3) Emulators are allowed, but yet again, only approved games
4) You must play Sonic Adventure/Heroes to realise how stupidly bad Sonic is
5) No online games until the age 12, and no microphone is allowed
6) ALL YOUR SMARTPHONE STUFF IS REGULATED. No snapchat/vine/etc.
7) If I recieve a message from you containing more that 1 emoji we are going to have a talk

books?

>That Megaman 2 rule

As much as you're a faggot OP, I've genuinely thought of the exact same rule before.

yeah that won't happen. It's not like kids suddenly start being motivated to do whatever autistic thing you want them to. If you were an actual parent you'd realize pretty quick this kind of black and white thinking leads you nowhere.

You can be strict and enforce rules with your kids without having to turn it into an autistic power fantasy. The kid won't do it anyway, he'll just turn to something else and make your life miserable again.

Forgot to mention
8) No access to the Internet at all until the age of 12, and no cancer like Markiplier is allowed in this house

>7) If I recieve a message from you containing more that 1 emoji we are going to have a talk

I don't know why, but that's actually kind of funny

Plan on having family video game nights to reinforce the importance of using games as a way to socialize rather than playing games alone as a means of isolation.

Also, no moe or furry games.

>being your child's friend instead of parent
yeah no

Times change. What might have worked in 2006 doesn't work any more.

>Having kids

>all this autismal rules
good job Sup Forums now your son will always remember that vidya is your thing and stay away saving his social life on the process