Hello lads, I'm a developer "working" on a very illustrious new game that is receiving a generous Patreon and kickstarter sum of money to work on it, but oh no! I've run out of excuses why my game has been repeatedly delayed, and come to you for suggestions how to further milk my dimwitted fans.
Here are what I've used so far: >lost the files in a house fire >robbed of my files (secure harddrive I always carry with me) waiting in line at the atm >new house was flooded by another tenant, ruining all my files and backups >hacked by anonymous >cat died >dog died >family killed in boating accident >wife left me >gf left me >assaulted by negro gentlemen walking from the game developer store >falsely accused of rape and arrested but later released >hungry >cold >wet
At this point my backers are really looking for actual content, so I've put out some stills and brief gifs I've whipped together in a few hours, but hey this money won't spend itself!
Post useful hoodwinks ITT for the rest of the game development community lads.
You really shouldn't make games man, you don't care enough.
Luke Hughes
>wet That made me chuckle.
Hudson Cook
gee whiz guys, sorrreeeeeeey
alpha soon, promise n_n
Ryan Lee
if everything fails, tell that sun told you not to release it.
Ian Sanders
hrt related delays
Chase Young
>game developer store Here's where I understood that this is not a honest thread
Cooper Morales
God, that pic gets me every time. Adorable
Asher Miller
>penis grows back (again) >game delayed for crying
Grayson Foster
Anyone that donates to patreon deserves to be scammed, so whatever.
Leo Ross
Communist revolutionaries taking over the server room and demanding all the computers in the building or they shoot the sysadmin.
Samuel Brown
Say that fluctuation in solar radiation created a magnatron that wiped out all of your files and gave you cancer. So now you need money to finish the game but also to get cancer treatment. And now you're the determined cancer filled game developer.
Aiden Roberts
It must have been the lightning storm we had (yesterday) (last week) (last month)
Julian Stewart
>the determined cancer filled game developer. has this ever happened? someone using their dying breaths to make a goddamn videogame and also tell everyone about how they're dying while they do it?
Juan Smith
It's called not being a retard and telling your investors what actually happened. In reality, natural disasters, office fires, burglary, and hardware failure are not fairy tales.
Connor Sanders
Interference from lunar radiation destroyed data on your HDD
Jason Torres
Say you have constant computer issues or some sort of health issue, and if anyone ever asks about your health issue never tell them what it is.
Brandon Ross
I'm sorry to inform you OP, that you have created a potentially fun thread. A mod will be with you shortly to delete the offending post and ban you.
Joseph Johnson
Forgot to take your hard drive out of your pocket before washing your pants.
Owen Collins
what game is this from?
Eli Hill
Say you're suffering from crippling depression.
Michael Thomas
Hyper Light Drifter
Luke Evans
this
Xavier Campbell
...
Jaxon Allen
Jesus fuck this. There are so many "indie devs" that are either the most sickly motherfuckers ever, or extreme hypochondriacs that think fee fee contusions require several days of bed rest.
Levi Morales
where's your liru?
Jack Clark
Does anyone believe that they are really sick? It's just another excuse.
Matthew Bell
Wolf girl with you
Nicholas Bennett
The Sun has told you not to finish the game.
Jace Hall
Which game did this again?
Bentley Howard
katalyka
Owen Nguyen
Reminder this game's out
Ryan Foster
I personally appreciate when they don't have the balls to hide behind their own illness for why they're lazing about.
>My mom is sick! >My dad is sick! >My dog is sick! >I saw someone on TV that looked sick! Small delay until the end of August.
Jose Lewis
Never Ever
Elijah Thompson
Clam legal negotiations with a AAA publisher trying to sue you. It hasn't been officially filed yet but your lawyer has told you not to show any new content in public till the issue is resolved, and you can't expose who it is because you want to try resolving the misunderstanding outside of court first.
Parker Morgan
Fucking Liru
Justin Wood
Yeah, there was a game called Crashlands, but it was actually fucking released and wasn't that bad either. I don't know if the guy died though.
Lucas Walker
electrical infetterence
Henry Watson
Oh shit
Blake Thomas
You have my attention
Jason Russell
Completely water tight excuse and can be used more than one or over an indefinite amount of time.
You could then ask for more money to help pay for your imaginary lawyer.
Joshua Nelson
that was the idea
Lucas Thompson
I just masturbated to the Liru game. Didn't complete it though, left like 3 chapters out because I couldn't work out how to get them. Voice didn't work either.
Angel James
GOTY 2016
Mason Roberts
>a game you're done with after nutting >anything more than GOTfifteenminutes
Charles Smith
>this every time she opens the door to you >a.uguu.se/sbxCrj6fRjyG_bgm_title.mp3 >also asks you to hug & make out with her I can't fap to this, lads. I'd feel bad.
James Gonzalez
Just stick it in her bra ring.
Robert Collins
But then she gets upset and uppercuts you.
Jaxon Phillips
Are you Lori and Corey Cole?
Kayden Harris
nice
Bentley Gonzalez
Love hurts, user.
Hudson Watson
Here we go
Jose Allen
I can though
Fucking punpun fags have no spine
Carson Wilson
pls no bully
Xavier Collins
What H-game is this? I saw a thread about it a long time a go but completely forgot the name.
Robert Cox
Project M
Jonathan Stewart
I have to ask what doujin that's from, it's perfect.
Wyatt Johnson
Noaika, made by Kyrieru The demo is great but the game might as well be in development hell for how much progress is being made on it.
Aaron Adams
>"""""""""""""""content""""""""""""""""
Levi Reed
Honestly, you should've caught on earlier than that.
Owen Miller
Thanks, user. >The demo is great but the game might as well be in development hell for how much progress is being made on it. Completely forgot the point of the thread. God dammit.
Jeremiah Martin
good enough for fap or two
Adrian Watson
...
Aaron Myers
Them furry bucks got to milk those autists
Evan Howard
download where?
Tyler Moore
So what's worse
Indie "devs" who procrastinate
Or fan translators who procrastinate?
>One of our team got in a car crash. Delayed indefinitely >No, we won't release an incomplete translation >No, we won't release the files so someone else can finish it in our stead >We're also not releasing it until we can fix images in-game. >No, we don't know how to do that yet, but we're hoping the tools will just drop in our lap before too long.
Jack Howard
Aeon Genesis fucking sucks, god I hate them.
Christopher King
Find the Liru sticky and Ctrl+F 'mega'
Juan Carter
needs more dickgirl on male
Noah Kelly
Is this a thinly veiled Falco Girgis thread?
Owen Turner
I mean yeah they take fucking years like a0t for Tales but they do a decent job at least
Samuel Turner
>Demo link is dead A sign of things to come I guess.
Charles Hughes
Definitely indie devs, since they're leeching up other people's money via gofundme and pateron and not working for it.
Fan translators are doing a service for free, so if they wanna dick around then that's totally within their rights.
Dylan Lee
...
Easton Johnson
Didn't they get insanely butthurt because their SMT patch was full of shitty bugs and someone actually fixed them?
Let's not forget how many fucking projects they start at once, for no real reason other than to claim ownership of them.
>SMT:if should be easy to hack because it's like SMT2! >still not out
Falco payed best friend Coal his kickstarter money for 6 months to make this 10 min reel of music 1:45 is just incredible youtube.com/watch?v=q3JuZvrNMKk
Angel Gray
>implying I haven't been fapping to those Liru teasers for the past 2 years. >implying I'm not going to fap to them for the next 2 years
Luis Martin
>tfw never ever is actually dead now
Liam Wood
I'll never understand the desire for making games. It just seems like such a shit job. Endless overtime and only payoff from austistic children and neckbeards.
Leo Phillips
>no anal >no costumes (apart from apron) >literally just bj, titfuck, missionary, and doggy I'm too far gone in my porn way to find this shit acceptable
Gabriel Wood
I'll never understand the desire for making anything.
;_;
Brody Green
You can make millions doing it indie, unlike art, music, writing, etc...
Brody Brown
...
Aiden Ward
Anyone have the archive link to whatever the first thread was after it was released? I need to see Sup Forums's reaction to never ever being killed.
Nolan Wood
>no anal meh
Carson Price
I think the only one that gets a pass is ILL. Motherfucker works on a toaster that can't even run the game he's working on properly, on top being practically blind and well, ill.
I just hope he gets a beta finished before he dies.