Tell Yoshi bedtime storytime now!

Tell Yoshi bedtime storytime now!

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DIE

1/2

what if ben franklin cracked and hijacks a boeing 747

>like one day he just snaps and starts mumbling to himself
>like his secretary forgot to file some papers one day
>and normally that's not a big deal
>but for ben franklin its the straw that broke the camels back
>and he just silently walks out of the room
>and starts talking to himself, goes to the airport
>nobody questions him getting on a plane, he just walks on and mans the cockpit and flys away
>he's a respected figure
>they don't question him walking in or getting on the plane
>like he's just silent and has a blank look when other people are watching
>and when nobodies around he just starts mumbling to himself
>>he takes off in the middle of a thunderstorm, but he calmly steers his way through, but hes mumbling barely coherent phrases to himself as hes doing it
>hes like "you can take article 5 and wipe your ass with it"
>hes the only guy on the plane
>he's completely alone flying through a storm
>he's like "Washington, that crooked hack, he can put that neutrality up jeffersons bony asshole"
>he starts bad mouthing his colleagues
>the planes kinda low on fuel and when the gauges go down, he just slowly starts to nosedive
>and he's still just mumbling to himself kinda quietly
>and the plane just hits the around and evaporates
>like dirt kicks up and there's a massive crater
>but there's nothing identifiable
>it just disintegrated on impact

...

Take your dose first.

2/2

>everyones in Washington looking for him because its time to sign the declaration
>but they just cant find him
>and its one of those things where like
>eventually someone says they saw him at the airport
>but nobody thinks he would be there
>but they check the tapes and there he is
>just calmly walking through
>and getting on a plane
>and nobody ever really knows what happened, nobody knew he snapped
>its just one of those things that remains a mystery forever and they do a lot of shows on it
>and they just sign the declaration anyway
>they do a speech like "one of our dear friends and founding fathers..... couldn't be here with us today to sign it"
>like they think he was murdered or it was some plot
>but in reality he just snapped and badmouthed all of them as he flew the plane into the ground
>they don't find his body in the crash, and they just figure it was someone completely unrelated
>they don't even know it was him on the plane until weeks later when someone tells them to check the airport tapes
>and they're baffled and cant believe its him when they see him get on the plane
>they just saw him as a mentally competent individual, and don't understand how it could of happened
>and when he snapped, he never did it in front of anyone
>like he wasn't nuts for days
>he snapped one moment and 25 minutes later he was taking off
>it all happened quick
>did he have experience flying aircraft before?
>or was he like some sort of genius
>maybe he didn't and just knew about it from playing flight simulator games in his spare time
>like in the late 90s
>adults who didn't know what video games were bought flight simulater for windows 98
>this happened a lot

Shut you egg shitter, we're trying to sleep here.

There once was an user, perhaps a little boy, perhaps a greasy manchild, who decided he wanted to go on his favorite board on his favorite site: Sup Forums. But first he needed to take a shit. It would have smelt bad to most, but it smelt nice to him for whatever reason.

He felt a question rise up within him, a sexual one or not I'll leave up to you, based on the aforementioned shit from before: "what would Yoshi's poop smell like?" He chuckled a bit at it, thinking it was silly, but as time went on in the day, he thought of it as a serious question.

After his daily ritual of shitposting to his lord and savoir Kek, he decided to make a thread about his favorite dinosaur, asking the question he had thought of earlier. But he had to convey how funny he thought it was, of course! After all, it was all for the heck of it, right?

Hoping for legitimate answers, he was instead greeted with laughter and disgust, all at once. Feeling betrayed, he left his board, hoping to feel welcome with fellow faggots such as himself, in /trash/

His legacy was forever immortalized within a single screencap,for multiple generations of users to gawk at, and save for themselves. His legacy is forever tied to Yoshi, as now no one can have a thread about Yoshi without a "haha" ringing in their ears.

Gimli could be heard chewing at the chicken leg as Pipping played with blocks on the floor like an idiot. Legolas walked back and forth around the Theodens hall waiting for the king and the others to come back while one of Theodens men stood deep in thought.

Gimli jeered and cheered as he swallowed the uncooked meat. "Ah hahahaha, raw meat off the bone!" he shouted belching, the fumes wafting toward Pippin who gagged. Legalos raised an eyebrow at Gimlis shouting.

"Gimli, you aren't eating the meat raw are you?" the elf asked concerned. Gimli nodded, raw chicken flesh caught in his beard as he swallowed a pint of mead.

"Aye laddy, raw meat off the bone! It's a Roharrim tradition!" he said tipping his mug at Theodens man who looked at Legalos shaking his head.

"Master dwarf, there is no such saying amongst my kinsmen." he says worriedly. "Eating raw chicken is dangerous, you could get sick or worse." he tells Gimli.

Gimli shakes his head in disbelief. "What are ye talkin about lad? I heard..." he says looking to Legolas who shakes his head. "I heard it was... oh no." he says burping, face turning green. "What have I done?" he asks feeling ill.

Legolas a bit scared shouts at Gimli, "You could die! Eating raw chicken could kill you!" he says worriedly as Gimli braces himself against the table.

To be continued.

I came face to face with the fire sumo!

I died.

Go back to sleep, pigfu

youtube.com/watch?v=1OYT7jWumyQ

The soldier of Rohan looked to Legalos thinking quickly. "We need to get him to expel the chicken from his stomach." he says getting an idea. "Quickly" he tells Pippin, "Run to King Theodens room, to his private bathroom and get his laxatives. We'll flush it out." he tells the young Hobbit.

Pippin nods and rushes down the halls toward Theodens bedroom and runs to the private bathroom, fumbling through his medicine cabinet and finds a box that says 'Laxatives' in large lettering.

Rushing back to the main hall he hurriedly gives the laxatives to Gimli he takes a bar out the chocolate stomach medicine out and munches it.

Theodens man picks the box up and his eyes widen. "These aren't the kings laxatives! These are his horses HORSE LAXATIVES!" he says in surprise as Gimli looks up worriedly.

"Is that bad?" he asks as Theodens man shakes the empty box.

"Yes! These are horse strength laxatives!" he says as Legalos smacks his forehead. "Where are the rest?" he asks looking around in time to see Pippin, excitedly caught up in the moment tearing into the laxatives and giggling maniacally like a child.

To be continued...

what the fuck

At one time, Bowser was not the twisted, maniacal villain we know today. He was once a gentle dinosaur. He frolicked among the other dinosaurs and even had a wife.

But his brother was jealous of him. One night in a fit of rage, his brother stuffed poor Bowser into a toxic sewer pipe. The green liquid inside the pipe changes him, both physically and mentally. And soon he wanted nothing but revenge. Now he hunts the Yoshi clan for the pain he suffered.

But before this unfortunate event, Bowser's wife bore him a beautiful child. A green Yoshi. And do you know who that Yoshi is? That's right, its you!

Sleep well little Yoshi.

haha

Gimli groans and leans into the dining table, raising his hand and burping. "I'm fine laddy, i'm fine-" he says farting loudly. A wet, disgusting dwarf fart tearing through the hall as Theodens soldier and Legalos cover their noses.

Gimli, embarrassed blushes through his beard. "Ah, ha ha, just a little-" he says before shit gushes down his clothes onto the floor in front of everyone in horror.

Suddenly Pippin rockets off the floor, shit propelling from his ass as his Hobbit half quarter pants fly off launching him to the chandelier where he grabs on and begins to spin, the force of the shit flinging him around and covering the room in shit as Gimli begins to vomit and shit at the same time, becoming a whirlwind shit machines covering Theodens man and Legalos in shit as Pippin drops to the floor and runs down the hall screaming.

"I'm scared! Help!" he screams all the while laughing at the same time as shit projects from his ass speeding him down the hall where he runs from room to room.

Meanwhile Gimli is spinning in circles on his side as puke and shit flies everyhwere and a handmaiden runs from the hallway covered in shit screaming "There's shit everywhere! It's everywhere!" she cries as Gimlis shit sprays her.

To be continued...

Top kek

There once was a cuck named OP, who..

Gimli was crying in pain but he couldn't stop, the horse laxatives tearing his small dwarf tummy a new one as he projectile vomits and shit around the room as Legalos tries to use Theodens soldier as a shit shield.

Meanwhile Pippin skips from room to room, shit spraying everything in his path as he laughs uncontrollably, handmaidens screaming, covered in shit trying to escape the Hobbits bowel terrorism only to be greeted by Gimli's shit storm spinning around the main hall.

Flash cut to the outside of Theodens hall as soldiers spray a naked Pippin down with a water hose as Gimli stands naked and wet, a blanket around him while Gandalf stares in disgust at the hall and back at Pippin. Aragorn tries to stifle his laughter as King Theoden screams in sheer shock and awe.

"Goddammit! It's everywhere! It's everywhere!" Theoden screams walking back and forth, shaking his hands toward his shit covered home. "It's fucking everywhere!" he screams, his voice shaking.

Gandalf turns to leave, passing Pippin who he looks down on in disgust as Pippin looks up covered in water, wrapping a towel around his shoulders as he giggles and smiles broadly.

The end.

what did he mean by this?

youtube.com/watch?v=GvJAKbkbtGg

oh lord

tell yoshi deadtime story now!

[145.9] "LYNCH LIBRARIAN"

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