A guy who was in the same class as me in school won £1,000,000 on a Scratchcard...

A guy who was in the same class as me in school won £1,000,000 on a Scratchcard. What games can I play to numb the jealousy?

Other urls found in this thread:

dailyecho.co.uk/news/14741353.Young_dad_scoops___1_million_on_lottery_scratchcard/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditImage

>Feeling jealous of a guy with a kid
Why?

Scratchers.

He is going to get fucked in the ass with taxes. Why be jealous when he will be very lucky to get even a 3rd of it?

you do know he's not getting the full million because of taxes right?

Also the vast majority of people who win big bucks tend to spend it/give it to family and friends and not have any of it left after a year or two. Are you going to be jealous of his debt in a few years?

That guy got to fuck at least one person while op has only fucked his hand.

But he has money now, and not having money is the only downside to having children.

this. Most lottery winners end up far worse off than they started

Payday

>not having money is the only downside to having children.
Is this nigga for real

He looks british, lottery wins are pre-taxed here

I smell big alimony payments on the way for this young lad

The downside to having children is that you look like a retard because your children are probably retarded.

is time to visit that old friend

That's a third of a million more than you have

This.

His wife's son will be happy.

>He looks british
What gave it away? Was it that he won fucking Pounds?

Name one other downside.

If it makes you feel better, all of that money will go towards raising his kid. He won't have much fun with it. Children are expensive as fuck.

There's a million and one ways to get a piece of ass these days.
Having kids just means you did it wrong.

Look on the bright side m8, at least you're not going to totally blow that money like he does, because he's a fucking young dad that made the decision to have a kid so obviously he's not the best decision maker.

>Americans prizes are taxed

Your country is just garbage. Kill yourselves already.

Free time gets nuked. I'm not giving you any more since you asked for one. Children have a load of downsides. Just because you like them doesn't mean you can simply state they're only positive bundles of joy.

...

>Why be jealous of £300,000?
Bruh

dailyecho.co.uk/news/14741353.Young_dad_scoops___1_million_on_lottery_scratchcard/

>22 years old
>Kids

JUST

Uhm you don't pay taxes for lottery winnings.

>le children are horrible meme.

Go talk to your mother you shitter.

>Free time gets nuked
How? Whatever hobby you have, you get your child involved. You people are retarded sometimes.

>Sup Forumsirgins don't like kids.

Betas not even wanting to spread their genes? Who knew?

Pffft

500k pounds after taxes is not that much money anymore. It's a few years to live on if you're very smart with it, but lottery winnings don't set anyone for life. Google how many people become rich after winning the lottery, and how many are right back where they started or worse after a few years.

Your mother misses you, user

No, it's taxed if you get all the money at once; if you do the smart and sensible thing, which is to get it given to you piecemeal over ten to fifteen years or so, you don't have a shitload of money in you need to manage. It'll also let you keep a bank account under 200k, which is the max limit for return on investment if the bank you're using closes.

What if my hobby is fucking hookers and shooting heroine?

He did complete his biological goal of reproducing tho. And if he is smart, a good 100,000 pounds of that will be stored for the little shit's use later on down the line.

Hell, he can buy a nice family home with the money, invest a little, get a job doing something he enjoys and old boy is set for life.

consider it everyday, family

>Dump all 1 million in a hedge fund with 5% dividend rate
>get 50k a year doing literally nothing

People who play lottery aren't that smart but once you have your first million it's easy to make another million

OP here. Read the story about how he only bought the scratchcard because the person in front of him did.

...Have you ever had children? You know they're not stationary beings that require being raised from literally nothing but a drooling, crying retard. Teaching these things are not immediately taught either.

Then time to the coolest dad in the world.

It's a million pounds after taxes.

Not that guy but my sister just bought a dog and trying to take care of the thing is literal suffering. Like holy fuck she bought cane corso for no fucking reason and the fucker just tries to eat shit and is a pain the ass literally all day. I imagine child rearing is similar for the first few years

If you need the government to set your allowance you've got more issues than you think.

The smart thing to do is get a lawyer to setup trusts. Set aside an amount for family, school, charity, put an amount into safe investments, and leave a small amount for you to play with as you please.

>lottery winnings don't set anyone for life
unless the pot gets as big as it did a few months ago where it was like nearly $2 billion in winnings which would have been like $800 million after taxes. You could blow $2 million per year with that kind of money and still have more than enough left over. But of course the person that won it was some multi-millionaire in one of the richest neighborhoods in the country because he bought a fuckton of lottery tickets.

>500k
>a few years to live

LOL

Fuck off.

>Americans have to pay for lottery winnings

Top fucking cuck country
How retarded is that?

I don't know how it is in the UK but in the US after taxes the most you'll get is $600K.

If you're not a complete retard it's enough to live off your entire life

A decade (or two if you live frugally) is still just a few years mate. It's not the rest of your life. When you're in your 40s, it's run out, and you have no job prospects? Good luck.

>you get your child involved
You do know that kids are annoying little shits that don't really give a fuck about your free time for at least 6 years after being born?

This. Literally just got to a brand new state (U.S) and have only been here for about 3 weeks. Literally knew noone here. I have fucked 2 7-8/10 girls a few times so far. It's literally fucking easy. Most women nowadays are just naturally sluts.

It's been said itt that bongs have their winnings pre-taxed, meaning he will receive 1 bongdollars.

Gotta make sure the government can afford to give money to Shanequeesha and her 14 children instead of telling her to fucking get a job

Retards like you are the retards that thinks an investment is letting $500 rot in your saving with 4% interest

Who cares if you're a landlord who earns more through rent than you could ever earn by being a wagecuck

Yea if you're MC hammer. If you continue living the life the way it was before the money but use the money in investments you can literally make 100k a year of straight profit from it. And the amount you make can continue to rise if you keep putting more into the amount you're willing to use. The rich get richer and the poor stay poor unless you win a million dollars or are stupid.

Other countries have to pay lottery taxes too you know. But you know, there the people who make all the earnings by scamming people into playing Lottery have to pay it.

>Be poorfag in Murrica
>stay poor even if you literally win the lottery

Top kek, no wonder your 1% owns 99% of the wealth

Envious. You're feeling envious.

Jamie Kay from Bournemouth (22 yrs of age).

Lucky sod.

>500k is enough to become a landlord and live off the profits for the rest of your life
>No other expenses come up such as maintenance, replacements, shitty tenants suing and/or breaking things (or just straight up non-tenants breaking and entering), etc.
Okay. It's nice to have a fantasy.

What's the difference?

>It's a "Lottery winner kills himself or murders someone" episode
What the fuck makes people not continue their normal lives after paying off their debt off the winnings?

this is why you'll stay a nearly homeless sack of shit your whole life, kid.

Friends and family.

100% serious too.

You accidentally replied to me right user? I'm and what you said LITERALLY has nothing to do with what I said at all.

Yes you do?

I would hate to be announced on a website or newspaper about winning the lotto

whys he holding a head sphere? does he not have anything else in his life?

he already lost it all by being an idiot and having them publicise his face.
his life is going to be fucking hell
if i could choose between winning a million bucks and everyone knowing about it and winning nothing at all I'd probably choose the former, but if I actually had friends and shit I probably wouldnt

Because like it or lump it, most people are fucking retards, and I suppose that just means it's more likely that a retard's going to win the lottery

If you think giving some 19-year old single mother of 3 £1million is going to magically change their life and set them up, you're underestimating how stupid these people are pulled that example out my ass but hey that's a pretty good image of working class bongland for you

>£40k a year indefinitely
>not enough to live on

>Have 500k fucking cash
>Get credit of another 500k or even more because youve got fucking 500k cash
>Buy million dollar apartment house and rent it
>not being able to live off that

>costs like maintenence etc.

Literally miniscule

>Suing costs
>being a landlord
>not having a real estate legal expense insurance

How old are you? 12?

>Kid in my school
>Total dick
>Family wins 6.5 mil
>EVERYONE wants to be this cunts friend
>Leaves our school because people kept asking them to buy them the new COD
>Even people who didn't fucking like it
>Nearly breaks down one day over it
>Family pull him out to put him in rich schooL
>Few years later have a friend who knew him better
>Says his family fucking blew it all on charity and cars
>Now poorer than they were beforehand

It wont last if he's a retard, take solace in that.

Having money doesn't change you. It changes everyone around you.

Someone I work with just carried on as normal more or less, other than buying a nicer house and working less hours. So some people act sensibly after winning at least.

Is it true that a bunch of lottery winners go bankrupt quite quickly?

Be honest, what would be the first thing you would do with a large sum of money if you won?

>Because like it or lump it, most people are fucking retards, and I suppose that just means it's more likely that a retard's going to win the lottery
there are people whose "job" it is to pester people who won the lottery about how they really really need the money. like tons of those
not to mention that most of your friends and probably even relatives are going to start demanding money from you
its not fucking easy

Put it in a bank account and forget about it until I have a chance to learn what the fuck you're supposed to do with large sums of money.

>Peace meal
>Allowing the chance for either inflation to fuck over your money or the government just telling you to fuck off and keeping the rest

Nope.

I'd unironically try to put it into stocks and try to double it.
Your goal should never be 1 million. It should be 1 billion.

>Indeed, 44% of those who have ever won large lottery prizes were broke within five years, according to a 2015 Camelot Group study.
seems so

Pay off bills and debts?

>Producing a genetic offspring is failure

you are one dumb mother fucker

well then you are fucking stupid because that is never going to fucking happen
there are a ton of millionaires out there, but not a lot of billionaires and that has its reasons

not only that, the actual prize money is significantly lower than advertised because they advertise the total you get if you opt for the retarded 30 years of annual payments. So on a $100 million lottery, you get maybe $50mil, and then on that you get like $30m after taxes

Save it, I'd spread 10% to family and 5% to friends, the rest would support me through my regular boring life

If it was enough to live comfortably off, I'd probably build a fucking cabin somewhere remote and never speak to anyone (in person) again.

Said no one ever.

There is a reason that lottery winners have a super high suicide rate.
The majority go broke within just a few years, that dont kill themselves before.

Its called the poor tax for a reason. Its for morons to have something to believe in, then when they get to the reality it fucking crushes them.

Probably buy a shit house and then not be able to afford it in 5 years. Currency is a global joke right now.

video games?

Fix my parents house and save the rest

fortunately the UK is not retarded like America so you don't have to go public with your win

>le i call everything anyone says a meme

Facebook is calling you massive faggot

Get an accountant to handle it for me.

Seriously the average person is too retarded to handle their own money, and I have no delusions that I'm any more capable.

Idiot fuck, nearly half your winnings go to taxes immeditely. Then guess what? You get to claim a lottery win on your taxes and get taxed AGAIN for the same money at the end of the year.

>not going to a lawyer first

It's like you want your accountant to rob you

Holy shit, seriously?