Tfw Conan is one of the few unintentionally legit reviewers out there

>tfw Conan is one of the few unintentionally legit reviewers out there

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dead on arrival

And for those who can't view the video here's the Youtube link

youtube.com/watch?v=eXJFbsQBvLw

>72 Hour boss fight.

The fuck Square. The fuck. Why take the worst part of their worst bosses and make it longer.

>That ending
>Conan tells the localization team that their game is shit right to their face

Holy fuck I'm in fucking tears Sup Forums

My sides aside it was a legitimate fucking on point review.

It's not a game so much as a fantasy simulator.

Removing Nomura was a mistake

Honestly one of the funniest Conan skits ever. Even manlet agreed.

its 3 in game days

God damn what if ff15 fails? I know it most likely won't but Jesus christ this shit looked boring as fuck

>3 day boss fight
How is this fun?

Seriously this. This was amazing, it would have only been better if he made fun of how gay they look but he obviously couldn't.

I told you faggots this game was dead on arrival after Nomura left

holy shit that ending
top kek

>Casual who's probably never touched a JRPG harder than pokemon in his life
>Sup Forumsirgins cum buckets and suck him off for hating on XV

I'm not expecting anything out of XV at this point, but you guys are really starting to get annoying, the fact that you're grabbing at sticks to keep hating on it and even taking Conan's opinion of all people is pathetic.

Listen again.

crazy japanese game is crazy. what a surprise

TABATA BLOWN THE FUCK OUT

>tfw probably going to get XV and enjoy it for what it is
>tfw this video was funny as fuck

Conan provides a pretty unfiltered view thats enjoyable to see, and many of his comments were already made by people who are into RPGs and this game in particular, get the stick out of your ass.

H..he couldn't even bring himself to shill this game WHILE Square Enix was actually there. Holy fuck this game is a trainwreck. Companies literally pay Conan to shill their games and he couldn't honest to god shill this game at all. This is the complete first negative review he's ever did

Not really a good representation of the game. Probably because they didn't wanted to show too much. What they showed was a walking simulator. Pretty disappointed. I love Conan too. Whatever. XV of the most anticipated game of 2016. It would do just fine.

>aggressive waste of our time.

holy shit, he fucking hates the game

I fucking love Conan.

Lighten up, faggot. I'm pretty hyped for FFXV and I still found this killing my sides

>he just stands in the corner

>we are trapped in a Beckett play
>this game should be called "Wait For Your Death In Real Time"
>why is this a game?

>Could've started the game with this thing
I laughed but it's true. Previous Final Fantasy games were good at starting you in the actions and introducing the world and characters as it went along.

>its like if James Joyce made a game

Elijah was the one who was playing it and he plays video games.

Conan made the same points ANYONE else has, after looking at or playing the game. It's a massive waste of time that makes no sense, that's the actual truth.

How did RPGs turn into this? How did the virtuous goal of creating video games in the spirit of Dungeons and Dragons and Lord of the Rings be perverted by these fucking Japanese developers? How the fuck am I supposed to be immersed in this anime shit?

I don't get why they wouldn't give conan some more combat segments and a little down time sections here and there.
This was an awful way to show off their game even Conan said they should've started off with the big turtle ass thing.

This game DID have that action packed opening but they cut it and made the remains into a shitty 2 hour trailer.

>3 real days fighting that boss
>3 real days trying to figure out the broken as fuck combat system
yeah no thanks

...

>t. someone who hasn't played it
It is a walking simulator. There's nothing else worth doing except struggling through the story.

He did part of chapter one(combat here), killed the turtle(lots of combat here), walked around the two cities, and copped out because the game was shit.

They didn't show all of it because clearly Conan was bored to tears during those parts.

Surprise the embarassing fag shit garbage is shit! The usual limp wristed brain dread faggots will lap it up. It'll hold them over till they can fag out with Kingdom Hearts 3.

HOLY SHIT XV-KUN ON SUICIDE WATCH

He says 3 real time days, I mean he might be joking or lying, but it didn't come off as one and he has no reason to do that because they're clearly taking it seriously

>72 hour boss fight
I should learn to stop pre-ordering Square Enix games, yet I keep doing it.

>thats a really impressive monster, WHY DIDNT YOU START THE GAME WITH THIS?

if only you knew conan. . .

Is this the end of Square?

Fuck that had me in stitches, I only shitposted after watching about a minute of gameplay
>it's just madness
>just an aggressive wasting of our time
>that's quite an impressive beast (could've started the game with this guy hint hint)

Is Conan literally /OurGuy/?

We still have Nier Automata

that game literally cant be bad

I just want to play Persona 5. Let the suffering end.

you know this stuff is marketed toward girls right?

I bet Conan would have loved what Versus was going for.

>instantly meet hot babe
>action packed
>revenge story

instead we get this gay boy band shit that makes no sense

You are slave.

There was nothing but walking and this and that. They didn't even show the combat or anything. This was a terrible clueless gamer. It is on par with his Overwatch one. That was also shit.

"Final Fantasy is an epic blueballs waste of time. 5/10"

-Conan

>How did the virtuous goal of creating video games in the spirit of Dungeons and Dragons and Lord of the Rings
>be perverted by these fucking Japanese developers?

This is the problem though, every rpg tries to be lord of the rings, and that shit is boring as fuck.

Final Fantasy XV should've stayed with it's Yakuza roots, that setting was so unique and could've attracted more players.

If anything Jap devs are the ones who are usually willing to do more experimental settings, so it's sad to see them bend over to the western design philosophy to try and cash in on elder scrolls/witcher money.

The sooner jap devs go back to drawing inspiration from Nausicaa and Castle in the Sky instead of visual kei and the mental and sexual deviancies of modern otaku, the better off everyone will be.

I hope Conan never crosses XV-kuns path or god knows what might happen.

tabata said said back in 2014 that the fight would take some in game days. eve square would be stupid to make a battle with a length of jrpg

>There was nothing but walking and this and that.
He said it was the longest he's ever played a game and he was clearly upset. They played a lot they just didn't show it all.

This one was good because he shat on the game and Eli is pretty cool tbqh, Overwatch was just boring because the game sucks and the people who were with him were boring.

>Aggressive waste of time

They haven't been wanting to show much at all and the games been in development for 10 fucking years and its literally 2 weeks away from launching. You can tell this thing is going to flop. HARD.

>God damn what if ff15 fails?
I hope it fails, they should have keep doing Versus instead of doing this shit.

conan would be even more confused if was persona 5

Is it not Yakuza anymore?

>tfw all the signs are pointing towards a game being shit but it will probably get rave reviews for its brand name alone

It just isn't fair Sup Forums

They showed alot of the same first 2 hours, but yea some parts had me very worried

>that one cutscene
>you know which one

It's all in good fun

>They haven't been wanting to show much at all
They've shown like everything.

Have you seen it? They butchered everything Versus was going for.

That's cool, but the guy in 2016 just said 3 real time days

What are you talking about. Its a game from the east, western reviewers will have a field day shitting on this (rightfully so)

>7 months

>yfw you waited a fucking decade for this
Tabata was a mistake

>tfw when a talk show comedian paid to advertise a product gives a more accurate review of this game than actual journalists.

Do you even listen to yourself? somebody who doesn't even play video games doesn't like it and is suddenly a blunder? have some self respect and at least wait to play it to declare anything about it

>somebody who doesn't even play video games doesn't like it and is suddenly a blunder?
sounds like Sup Forums

that damage control is epic, there's no other word for it. neogaf and square HQ are probably melting down.

>where's muh action and guns
I bet if it was Call of Duty they'd love it.

honestly when you watch this from an outside perspective, FFXV is actually kind of retarded.

I mean what the hell was the vision for this game even

Meanwhile his review is incredibly accurate.

>Sup Forums is too stupid to differentiate jokes with actual criticism

Someone needs to do a edit of the case with this quote.

What's the fucking point?
-Conan, 2016

Who gives a fuck about experimenting with different settings when they don't include player choice and freedom, important foundations in actual role-playing games? All Japan can do is make adventure games that try to be movies.

Pic very related

yeah, some random guy knowns more than the director

This sort of thing is very common with projects that take forever.

Gotta say, I'm fully prepared for this game to be shit. I simply do not care anymore. Glad I canceled my preorder a couple of months ago.

>Square thinks Conan is sarcastic when he calls this game shit.

You're a fucking faggot, dude.

>people in comments trying to say Conan has the attention span of a five year old, etc.
>mfw

I guarantee he's more patrish than all of them combined and knows very well what good writing and presentation looks like.

FFXV just dosent have it

His review is completely accurate and Elijah was with him. He played the game for a few hours and said everything we have about it being shit.

It is, but they watered it down a LOT to appeal to the west. I guess the devs didn't communicate enough with western fans in the early stages,

because for some reason they thought we wanted more of the same old LOTR and GOT fantasy settings we've gotten an infinite amount of times.

I mean yeah they did something a bit interesting by modernizing them, but had they gone with the Yakuza thing the game would be so much cooler and it would've intrigued a lot more people

and more of Sup Forums would probably excuse the cast since they could've worked as a Yakuza gang instead of giving the current boy band impression so many anons are imrpinting.

>eve square would be stupid to make a battle with a length of jrpg

Versus had a vision but Tabata shit on it and mashed every western game together hoping it would be the next Skyrim. It has no vision.

Can't wait to see this shit bomb .

>we will never play as 6'3 Noctis
>we will forever be stuck with manlet Noctis and his faggy friends

>mfw people are gonna buy this game regardless of how shitty it is because they need to complete their FF collections

>72 hour boss fight

There's no fucking way that's real

This. RPG is the genre.

Japan is the country that can't make games in that genre. Just like they can't make strategy games, shooters and so on. The Japanese mind is simply too primitive for it.

They aren't jokes, Conan is just funny. He's critiquing, he usually does playing these games.

>people bought a ps3 for this
>people bought a ps4 for this
>people bought a ps4 neo for this
>it's fucking shit
XVI is going to be some dull 'safe' medieval fantasy after this blunder, mark my words.

>boy band
isnt that to get girls to buy the game?

girls like these type of guys

The West can't make RPGs anymore either.

FFXIII LOOKS BETTER THAN THIS SHIT

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED

THIS LITERALLY LOOKS LIKE PLAYSTATION HOME

I would sacrifice the existence of the FF7 Remake it meant Versus would get full bloom.

Holy shit what happened

Conan just tells it how it is, even while being a shill. He questions why games make mocap actors in game look worse than the actual actor, he is always looking for tits and ass during games like Overwatch GTA V and Witcher 3, honestly he is very relatable.

It's fucking hilarious how bad this game is.

>mfw "why did we waste our time fixing the stupid car when riding a chicken is much easier"
Sums up this game in a nutshell