Invite female friend over for vidya

>invite female friend over for vidya
>she beats you in every game you play

git gud

How can you be so bad?

>female friend

have you fucked?

I'd let her step on my and sit on my face

>gf has ssx tricky
>was my fav game as a kid
>beats me at it
>fucks my ass after

I felt bad for losing but was a pretty good time desu

>female friend turns out to be some mlg chick who's beaten over 5000 games and wins tournaments in 90% of all game genres since they've started

Did you beat her up?

ITT: things that never happen, ever.

What happened to Vince?

>play with female friend on online game
>she's the only other person that even can play the game correctly
>we both have greater than 5.00 KDRs and routinely pub smash everyone.
man those were good times.

is that donald trump?

white boi mad

Too much swag

I want a girl to beat me and then peg me after.

>invite female friend over for vidya
>she beats you off

>wished this would happen
>women have slower reaction times
>don't have the motivation or reason to play and get good at skill based games
>Your GF will never be equal or superior to you in video games.

Sometimes, deep down, as much as I hate SJWs, I really wish men and women were actually physically equal.

>invite friend other to play some games
>think i'm hot shit at fighting games and put on ultra street fighter 4
>she's actually fucking amazing at fighting games and she never told me
>destroys me 10-0 with her sakura
>"l-let's play some smash now..."

>meet cool girl
>start dating
>she says she plays vidya
>I get excited
>"yeah, I spent so much time in WoW and dota2"
>mfw

did she have a feminine penis?

>all these fucking normies in Sup Forums now
jesus christ

>that moment I realized the reason I'm such a beta submissive faggot is because the only females I ever associated with always tried to take advantage of me or just straight up mock me

>Out with friends
>friend (female) starts talking about how she's really gotten back into N64
>playing a lot of Goldeneye and Mario Party
>tell her I'm the fucking king of Mario Party
>she says we have to play some time
>later that night we're both absolutely wasted
>she's going home
>asks if I want to come play video games
>autism makes me ignore the fact a girl asked me to her house at 3 am and instead focus on the video games
>get hype as fuck during cab ride
>back at her house
>put on some MP3
>we startl playing
>I'm losing every minigame
>get upset and start yelling
>she's laughing and teasing me thinking it's all a joke
>I'm genuinely upset
>as a joke, say there's only one way I can settle this
>go up behind her and pretend to strangle her with controller cord
>it's all a laugh until the cord tightens
>she starts moaning
>I ease off the tension
>she says, "Don't stop"
>I comply and pull on the cord again
>eventually she's lying on the ground with me on top of her choking her with a fucking N64 controller
>"fuck me"
>I don't know what to do
>just fall to the ground
>say, "I have to go now"
>run out of the house
And yeah, now I really wish I wasn't a little bitch and had gone through with it.

>mfw girl
>mfw been going to arcades in japan since I was a baby
>shit on everyone in fighting games
>everyone spills their spaghetti all the time

...

I would challenge her to sex.

...

>female friend
>female
>friend

this thread has some real ladwewing potential

Are you playing The Sims competitively?

Won't happen.

Even amongst men, physical men with penises, they segregate themselves into the "feminine men" who are weak and insecure, and the regular men who can fight and are mostly confident.

Unless you mean we like seperate humanity into 3 sexes - Woman, Man, and Trap. Where Woman and Man are strong and confident, and Trap just gets raped all the time by both Man and Woman for being weak and useless for anything but sex.

You must be intensely bad at video games.
I ahve mostly female friends, and have never ever been beaten by a female in any game.
Most of them struggle with basic concepts of logic, desu

>"Hey, user. Wanna play some games? I know you're not the best at 'em, so I'll go easy on ya."
>"I'm actually really good at this kind of thing. So, don't get too upset if you lose, eh? I wouldn't wanna see you cry!"
>Tell ya what, let's make this fun: if you beat me I'll suck you off! Whatt'ya say?"

>female
>friend

Pick none.

>Playing Reach with a friend
>Load into lobby
>It's a fucking team of female MLG gamers
>Get bodied

Pretty embarrassing.

>Beat her in games
>"Come on! Let me win one!"

>Let her win. She knows you're letting her win.
>"Yay! I won!"

>invite female friend over for smash
>she wont stop complaining about her boyfriend
>win a round, she sits on my lap
>cant see the screen
>Okay yeah no cheaters allowed
>kick her out

my wife fucking crushes me at basically every game and I beat everyone else I know

To be fair, most of Sup Forums struggles with basic logic too.

Each of these violates some law of physics, pointing to moving portals being bs to begin with. That said, it's B, because the cube's speed relative to the portal entrance is high, and the cube's speed relative to the portal entrance gets conserved

It must be nice to have such a childishly simple view of the world

What did he mean by this?

>I ahve mostly female friends
You better be gay son otherwise this is the faggiest thing Ive ever heard

The cube has no velocity, dumbo.

Nah, I'm engaged to a girl, friendo.
I'm just not very social and I dislike groups of men.

Perfect. This means her dick is bigger than yours, at the very least. Ask if you can suck it. Beg if you have to.

>tfw

Eventually we'll probably have enough deus-ex style body augmentations that anyone who wants to be physically powerful can do so regardless of gender if they can afford it

>invite girl over for vidya
>all she wants to do is fuck
wtf i just wanted to play mario kart

It isn't fucking B you dipshit. The portal isn't a physical object. It has no velocity, no mass, no nothing. It's literally just a tear in space. It's literally just a wormhole, you complete piece of retarded shitter. Wormholes DON'T. WORK. LIKE. THAT.

>girl in my apartment complex talked massive shit about how she was so god damned invincible in super smash brothers a long time ago
>about 5 other guys my age all exclaimed she beat the living shit out of them
>I never played it with any of them before
>after hanging out with them and her for like 6 months one day someone puts in smash and everyone starts playing
>I intentionally restrain myself from embarrassing them all because they seemed to take it all very seriously, but I still win
>she sees me win and starts talking shit
>I bet her a kiss that she'll lose against me and she bets me a punch to the face that I'll lose against her
>push her shit in 20-2 with Falcon, won that kiss
>few years later we moved in together

This.
Every time.

The "girls only pretend to like vidya for dick"-meme was true all along.

>>I bet her a kiss that she'll lose against me and she bets me a punch to the face that I'll lose against her
that, my friend, is a win/win scenario

y-you too

>things that never happened
>by user, mom's basement

vidya n chill?
noice

kek'd until my sides reached the sun

worse yet, when a girl wants to watch game of thrones or some shit she isn't in the mood. Yet when we're doing something I want to do she wants to derail it into fucking

fuck game of thrones

We didn't live happily ever after.

>friends female friend joins
>everyone starts acting differently
>constant complements
>laughing at things that aren't funny
>friends don't play for real so we lose constantly

Hey, I actually have a good time watching GoT with my gf, because it's one of the few things we can do together.
She refuses to touch vidya, and I can't stand listening to all her inane blather about social stuff.

But when I try to watch somethinga ctually really nice and interesting with her, she'll ALWAYS sit on her phone, start knitting or derail.

Fuck, it annoys me how dumb girls can be.
I mean, I love her. She's a nice person, generally. But why so dense? Why are they incapable of appreciating deeper things than social drama?