ITT: Stupid shit you don't wanna see in video games anymore

ITT: Stupid shit you don't wanna see in video games anymore.

For me it's FUCKING spiders. They're the most generic bland ass enemy type you could put in a motherfucking game. Devs think they're fucking smart and original putting spiders are the game and making them big as fuck.

If I'm playing a game I wanna fuck some shit up against good enemy types that don't have some stupid ass poison gimmick. 90℅ of fantasy games have fucking big ass spiders but I just wanna chop up some real enemies. Smh fám.

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youtube.com/watch?v=XZ-EOg38t1o
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sounds like someone is afraid of spiders

Benis

Zombies.

Amazing how the lamest of all there is in horror has become so popular in games and media. Nothing badass about zombies. Nothing scary about them either unless they run.

skeletons are worse imo

But it doesnt makeeven any sense having eldritch abominations and space horror in the forests surrounding populated towns

You fight rats and bugs because rats and bugs live places.

>why havnt these demons and monsters killed any and all intelligent life in the entire surrounding locale
HURR DURR INTERESTING ENEMY DESIGN WHO CARES ITS JUST A.VIDEOGAME IT LOOKS COOL

>Level taking place inside of someone/something's body
>A million beating hearts in the background, random pools of acid everywhere, blood cells just casually floating around in the mouth or some crazy shit

Why not a level in the lungs with crazy floaty shenanigans? Why not a level in the ear? Why not a level in bone marrow or some shit? The only time I have ever forgiven this wacky shit is in Xenoblade, with that ridiculous like fifty-something chambered heart. It's a planet-sized titan, of course that makes sense. But you still had goddamn blood cells casually floating around.

>tfw the Fantastic Voyage remake will never come out, and even if it did the era of movie games is dead
>Trauma Center is dead
>All hospital games are either meme garbage like Surgeon Simulator or flash games for kids

...maybe that Magic School Bus remake will throw me a bone

Half assed crafting systems

t.Arachnophobe

But how else would they introduce their poison mechanic?!?

Isometric games are the fucking worse desu.

Bad stories. For a medium to place so much importance on storytelling it's bizarre to me how the stories are simplistic even in comparison to teen fiction novels.

Game with multiple routes and the viewed scenes/cutscenes are not skipable.

>t.Arachnophobe
Was about to post this.

The problem is these devs never seem to research Spiders beyond visuals, because they never actually act like Spiders, which would be terrifying if the did.

>Half assed crafting systems
fucking this

Fucking this. I think crafting is a great idea but I feel like every iteration of it has just be a shittier version of minecrat's.

Memes in games as a half-assed - wait, scratch that, a no-assed - attempt at humor.

Tutorials that are integrated into the story. I'm not completely opposed to tutorials, they can be useful for more complex games, but having to wait for a character to praise me about how GREAT I did at pressing the attack button may just be a bit overkill.
Also this.

Racing games with traffic.
FUCK OFF I JUST WANNA GO FAST!

imagine a spider survival horror game
after a spider plague curse outbreak everything organic is transforming into living spiders

hello did someone say spiders

>imagine a spider survival horror game
youtube.com/watch?v=XZ-EOg38t1o

Open world. Too many games do it shitty, I would forego all good ones

This.

Jumping spiders (and mantises) are fucking scary because not only are they lightning fast, they have eagle eyesight and are actually sapient, lucid thinkers despite having a brain the size of a grain of salt.

Yet most spiders in video games are low level trash mobs that walk slowly towards you and spit weak poison or webbing and shit like that.

Women.

OP, if you're an arachnophobe, then I encourage you to shine a flashlight on your front lawn sometime at dusk or night this summer.

9 times out of 10, all the little iridescent spots you see in the grass aren't drops of dew, but the light from your flashlight reflecting off the retinas of spider eyes in the grass as they stop and watch you standing on your porch.

>Buy the game
>Four planned DLCs that cost as much as the game did to be released some time in the future, pick up a season pass today

No more Season passes. Just give us the whole game FFS.

Imagine paying full price to watch a movie but 4 major scenes are missing and you have to pay extra to download and watch them when you get home.

They always ALWAYS make spiders walk around like they're suspended on a system of muscles.

I really dont mind spiders in games. Its just i dont think a single game has ever gotten it right. They seem to think just the fact thst they're spiders is enough. Theres so much more to them than a few legs and eyes. Im pissed they dont make them ambush predators.
Imagine just walking in a field then a spider snatches you from its camo home coats you in web that is an actual hinderance(web is strong as fuck) and then they inject you with venom and you have to exhaust yourself not only trying to get out of the web but while slowibg being poisoned until you kill that spider for some antivenom bwfore you run out of time and it eats you alive. And thats just scratching the surface. All i want is a good insect game Sup Forums.

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Microtransactions
Load times
Day one patches

>Strictly good or evil moral choices
At least allow a character on both ends to justify committing actions on either side of spectrum rather than just having options be "paragon of virtue" and "murder hobo"
Give me some depth to the morals, tons of grey and no black or white.

I'm sick of devs adding status effects that are worthless.
I'm sick of devs making shit obviously exploitable and imbalanced with no obvious forethought for the game itself.
I'm sick of good games being in a language that doesn't matter.
I'm sick of snow landscapes because they are tied for THE most lazy, boring, generic landscape in a video game, the only other kind that is that boring is desert.
I'm sick of equipment durability would be completely and totally outlawed because it adds nothing but tedium and annoyance, it doesn't add some sorta fucking realism for turbo nerds, it annoys your actual playerbase that matters, that out number said turbonerds ALWAYS.
I'm sick of dps/tank/healer but it cannot and will not ever be done away with without making a game boring as fuck.
I'm sick of devs trying to bring back arena fps and rts, the shit is dead. Stop embarrassing yourselves.

The need for devs to one up each other when it comes to map size.

Id rather take a detailed small city over an emoty desert

>season passes
>overpriced DLC
>preordering
>sandboxs
>crafting
>zombies
>crafting and zombies
>no properly done horror
>no properly done sci-fi
>wolves
>contemporary warfare setting
>micro-transactions
>series that don't end even after they do
>series that only exist because the publisher wanted a decade of cash cow+spinoffs
>series that only countine to exist becuse little Juan had moms credit card x1000
>EA
>Chinese shovelware

Fuck, all those times I crawled around in the grass at night playing flashlight tag as a kid.

m.youtube.com/watch?v=qXEUYe5EZWw

That's exactly what I was talking about, and I learned about it the same way as this dude, mowing my lawn one day.

Oh neat, they can run on water.

I think the way camel spiders charge light sources is fucking terrifying.

Even after crushing them I've still seen them twitch.

youtube.com/watch?v=vsAvyE9-kK0

Over emphasis on graphics instead of actual gameplay mechanics, AI and controls.

Fuck that shit dude

I can't stand it when people use memes as a substitute for actual comedy/jokes, nobody needs to be clever or actually funny anymore, just slap some shitty internet meme on it and bam, you are the master of comedy.

>child ghosts in horror games
>crafting systems
>empty open worlds
>season passes
>unskippable tutorials
>4th wall breaks
>X being a metaphor for virginity
>black protagonists

Fuck you I loved GTA San Andreas

eye candy worlds with fuck all to do in. This shit is pretty much the AAA shovelware everyone eats up

>way too big open worlds that make travelling boring
>empty open worlds stuffed with collectables
>generic 'humans are shit' or 'money corrupts' messages
>microtransactions
>memes/pop cuture references
>diverse characters for the sake of diversity
>sequels with less content than the previous game

>PnP mechanics in a fucking FPS

Spiders are boring as fuck the way they're always implemented; huge but slow
Just imagine if the spider was three feet tall but still moved in bursts so fast it appeared to be teleporting like a jumping spider
Imagine this little bastard but a thousand times bigger

I wanna make sweet, sweet love to that breast.

IF I SEE ONE MORE GLOWING LADDER I SWEAR TO FUCKING GOD

A LADDER HAS ONE SINGULAR PURPOSE

NO OTHER OBJECT IN EXIST LOOKS LIKE A LADDER

IF I SEE A LADDER I'M GOING TO ASSUME THAT IT'S MEANT TO BE USED AS A LADDER

STOP MAKING MY FUCKING LADDERS GLOW

I hate it when games have you hold the use button to do basic shit like grabbing stuff or opening doors. Just let me tap it or do it automatically if it makes sense.

Well, a lot of zombie games don't even try to be horror games any more. Generally the human enemies are more fun to fight too.

SPRINTING AND AIM DOWN SIGHTS

JUST LET ME MOVE

JUST LET ME SHOOT

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

>jump button is also the action button

>Imagine just walking in a field then a spider snatches you from its camo home coats you in web that is an actual hinderance(web is strong as fuck) and then they inject you with venom and you have to exhaust yourself not only trying to get out of the web but while slowibg being poisoned until you kill that spider for some antivenom bwfore you run out of time and it eats you alive

yeah undetectable poison traps with qte sounds fun as fuck

>series that don't end even after they do

Everything after Halo Reach is a mistake.

>do fetch quest
>thanks
>hey come back sometime and I'll have another job for you
Fetch quests are actually a little satisfying, even if a low form of quest and newer games have made them all completely meaningless because they repeat. You never get any satisfaction of helping someone because everyone always needs your help again.

>find a valve or some shit
>have to rotate the analog for x amount of time
>rotating the analog faster doesn't make the bar fill faster

>Not instant transmission.gif

I agree, spiders are overdone. Especially because they're never done right. Devs always assume we're stupid enough to just engage a clearly stronger enemy when in reality spiders hide away without a trace, waiting for the best moment to strike. Pretty scary beings actually.

A giant snake bossfight, duh

Bald protagonists. If I go bald i'm going to fucking kill myself.

Could work if it's a Souls style thing where you fall for it the first time but know how to solve the situation afterwards.

what if we have a horde of little spiders working together to wrap you up, or what if its like here in aus your looking around at shit and out of no where under that book you picked up a red back appares and is pissed off so you have to quickly think what to do or else your gonna get bitten and die

Tutorials.
I just want to learn how to play through game-play.
Let me get punished by the game, I don't want to read you wall of text.

>approach door
>the entire frame lights up obnoxiously
Hmm

I blame Germany and their no violence towards real people meme.

>Pokemon has been a thing for 20+ years
>Several in-game titles and shit reference this
>Sun/Moon has the absolute worst goddamn handholding for several hours straight the series has ever had

That being said I don't give a shit about the game telling you what's effective and what isn't because I only play Pokemon games every couple releases, and I'm not going to remember every single one of your 800+ monsters, especially when you pull bullshit like Raichu doing goddamn water moves at me.

Well it is aimed at children.

>ITT: Stupid shit you don't wanna see in video games anymore.

Not being able to pause a cutscene. I sometimes had phonecalls coming in mid game that just took me right out of it..

youre trash brock

I actually really like being able to easily identify usable items. It's helpful in this era where every desk is cluttered with useless details.

Modern children are fucking retarded then

>Red/Blue/Yellow
>There's a Snorlax in the road
>If only we had something to wake him up!
>Better go explore until I find it
>Clearly can't go that way, not even through certain bushes
>Eventually find the Poke Flute
>Gary motherfucking Oak ready to wreck your asshole at a moment's notice

>Sun/Moon
>Haha oh jeez there's a Tauros in the road
>Hey player come this way
>No seriously player come this way
>COME THIS WAY
>Hey are you full up on revives
>Let me give you more revives
>Let me heal you before every single plot battle
>Let me give you more revives

That game was an absolute cakewalk until Kukui or whatever his name is bent ass over on the mountaintop

I wasn't sure what you mean by 'charge light sources' at first and thought for a horrible moment there was actually a species of spider out there capable of emitting electricity that likes to overload lightbulbs

please don't give devs any ideas
>horror game based entirely on electrical gigantic sneaky spiders that turn rooms pitch black before attacking

Fuck you, I love smashing them to bits.

System Shock 2 sort of did that

The MANY had spider forms that were created from human materials

Pretty sure those are specifically wolf spiders.
They have a kind of thing behind their retina that bounces the light back through it so they can see better in lowlight conditions.
Spiders do have shit eyesight though due to size etc so they probably can't see you on your porch for instance. Predominant tactic of various prey is going to be to stand still when they think a spider is about because of that.
There are various spiders with better eyesight like jumping spiders but it's still not that great.

quest markers, fucking quest markers.

>eight (8) eyes
>meh eyesight
Why have they got them then? Legit question.

At least more games are putting a big circle on the minimap indicating where to look rather than a straight quest marker

well, that's a step in the right direction

I've always thought about a horror game revolving entirely around spiders because I don't think spiders are ever "spidery" enough.
>come across a giant webbed hole in the brush
>you shine your flashlight into it
>6 large white globes appear at the back
>it suddenly comes to mind you forget to check where you were walking
>you've been stepping all over webbing connected to the den
>you look back up
>the globes are closer
>you realize it can now sense the vibrations of your now racing heart
>your turn to run
>you hear a faint scrambling noise behind you

High FOV for detecting motion. It's why they seem so skittish when you get near them.

neato

Those spider things in The Mist were pretty cool.

What's wrong with spiders, fagtron?

>I'm sick of devs trying to bring back arena fps and rts, the shit is dead. Stop embarrassing yourselves.
DOOM says hi.

Only games that were ever really good with zombies were the old Resident Evils. Everything else has just been getting shitter.

Dead Rising 1 was alright, but god was Dying Light fucking boring.

RE4

...

This

>division thread
>people wish the game had zombies or mutants
>any post disease outbreak scenario has to shoehorn in zombies or mutants to appease normies
zombies have been done to death jesus its one of the things I like about the division is that it didn't take the low hanging fruit.

On a zombie related note I was really disappointed that the cordyceps zombies in TLOU didn't really feel unique or different than any other medium's zombies.

I'd play the shit out of a game like Train to Busan though

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>Stupid shit you don't wanna see in video games anymore.

Squid aliens

You could do an entire horror game with just different flavors of arachnids.
>Jumping Spiders
>Trapdoor Spiders
>Tarantulas
>Recluse
>Huntsman
All of them could be built different enough to warrant variant enemy types just to completely fuck over an arachnophobe.

>loadouts with fucking DLC weapons
not an arena shooter

Imagine a survival horror set in a Tiberium-infested Yellow/Red Zone.

lmao kys burger

>tfw we finally left the era of Themepark WoW clone MMOs
>tfw now all we have in the genre is a few remaining themeparks and a bunch of kickstarter sandbox games on the horizon
>tfw all of them seem to have 1-2 good ideas but due to the nature of kickstarter they show off little to no gameplay, promotional assets/terrible assets, lots of promise but not clearly defined roadmaps

Being an MMO autist is suffering nowadays, I just want old school Lotro back.

Forcing the player into a sociopolitical agenda, especially if it's an RPG IE: coming across a gay man or woman and your only response options are "oh", "how does that work?!", or "good, I'm happy for you." Shoehorning diversity into a game goes hand in hand with this cancer too.