Aside from Gwynevere, do you think people in Dark Souls ever have sex?

Aside from Gwynevere, do you think people in Dark Souls ever have sex?

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Yet another example of why Soulsbourne fags are genuinely the worst group of fans in all of gaming culture

>aside from Gwyndolin
ftfy

Me when i raped u in a duel last night

I'd gauge that by how stylish the character's armour is. Artorias, Ornstein, and Onionbro are all straight pimpin'.

Pontiff Sulyvahn, since he pretty much fucked everyone over

Ornstein is probably Dragon furry tho

In all honesty he was pretty much the sickest pimp around. The dude was living the life.

> The Dancer.

I don't imagine many people do, given the world is mostly composed of beef jerky men, asshole clerics, and solitary sorcerers.

Also there's the whole thing where having kids means bringing them into an eternal cycle of damnation.

Is pic related pure?

Just like fans of the games, never.

...

>gaming culture

don't act like I would associate with you

probably they do when the world isn't dying from a zombie apocalypse

>not wanting to be ravaged by a beef jerky undead
wow holy shit kys

> literally the opposite of pure
Id still eat that butt tho

So how's your first day on the internet fag?

kek

God damn I'd smash Gwyndolin so hard.
So fucking hard.
And all of you as well!

Is there anyone more of a pimp than Sulyvahn? I'm asking in all seriousness

Well how often do those who are losing their mind in asylums get laid? I'd imagine its equivalent or less (as those in asylums don't fight off eldritch horrors)

I dont think those hollows even have a sex drive anymore

No, they don't have sex the women just have babies whenever they want.

It was implied that lady Maria fucked Gherman

This truely gave me a hunters nightmare

Or rather he raped her and the doll was his sex toy.

Weren't Karla and Yuria(DeS) implied to be raped in those creepy fuck-dungeons?
I know Karla has specific dialogue if you dress up as one of the jailers or something

*to have been raped

I mean, if you're a beef jerky guy and there's a beef jerky woman over there, chances are you're gonna fuck at some point. It's just human nature.
I guarantee that in the event of nuclear apocalypse, people with hair falling out and severe radiation burns on like 90% of their bodies will still be banging irl.

For a popular series, im really surprised by the sheer lack of porn for soulsbourne. I mean degenerate/filthy fetishists would have a field day with thism

I mean in New Vegas there was a ghoul who was a prostitute
If there's a will there is a way

>Tfw dark souls story is basically a zombie virgin goes out and fucks up a bunch of normie gods for no reason

>I wonder if uncle Gael found it.... the Dark Souls 3™ of man...

seriously FROM?

The girls of Dark Souls are pure!
PURE!

That looks more like an arm than a boob.

>No reason
They did fuck over the human race for personal gain, to be fair.
I always choose Dark ending. Even if it's shit, at least those gods get their comeuppance. It's not like humanity can get even more fucked when they're all turning hollow anyway.

Pretty sure you're the only one who sees it.

In mind maybe, but lets face it user. The girls are filthy and probably stink really bad.

siegmeyer or whatever had a kid
the blacksmith in DS2 had a kid

I'm not sure, he's actually missing some parts...

I legitimately can't name anyone. The dude literally handled a politically dangerous noble by just making her his personal stripper, presumably banging her, and then getting bored and sending her on a suicide mission somewhere.

The dude was seriously based.

I dont think anyone, or has time to, take a bath in the series.

I'm going to chalk that up to not wanting to model a penis to put in a video game.

Let me guess, Friede cut out his dick and is the reason for him being such a cunt?

Whenever you die, you reborn clean. So good hollow hygiene is literally throwing yourself off a cliff.

No, stare at his groin. There is a flesh wound where his dick would have been.

Kek. Sullys got a mangina.

I dunno, the fact that they put in a big ol' scar right there versus just leaving it blank suggests something else to me.

Source on rape implication?

Banishing the dancer makes a bit more sense now.

Sulyvahn is quite literally a tree-man, as in, the son of the Birch Woman in the DLC that goes all crazy on you after the crabs.

I don't think trees have dicks.

>Birch Woman
Witch trees?

Say that to the tree rapist in evil dead.

They sure got balls though.

Still, what evidence do you got for that hot tree theory?

The Witch Tree guarding the Sulyvahn sorcery has hidden dialogue where she talks about her child who left the painting. It all matches up.

Birch Woman is the name of a semi-cut content NPC.
She has cut dialogue concerning her lost son. Instead she just kinda screams incoherently.
She's found guarding Snap Freeze, which states
>One of the spells left behind by the young sorcerer Sulyvahn before leaving the Painted World. Creates a cloud of near-freezing mist.
>Sulyvahn was born and raised inside the painting, yet had little use for his frigid homeland, since he had not yet experienced loss.
Sulyvahn also strongly resembles the textures of the tree women.

Don't forget he also literally grows branches during his fight.

>Sulyvahn is into tall women like the Dancer because he's part tree
Deepest lore

kek

Speaking of, does his face kind of remind you guys of the texture on the angel's wings in the DLC trailer?

isn't gwynevere a dude?? XD

I just assumed that was because everyone connected to the church of the deep seems to grow branches.

Where can I listen to these lines? Google isn't being very helpful today.

I'm personally hoping that Sulyvahn is related to the angels as well

Whether the branches are related to the deep, or his wooden lineage, they certainly reveal that Sully is hiding something.

Probably because you never even see most of them without their armour.

I really hope that he just keeps getting connected to things until it basically becomes a game of "Spot Sulyvahn's influence" throughout the series.

I know! Where's my art of dark spirits corrupting hosts with bullshit hexes and having their way with them? It's only right.

>"You see that dead dragon over there, Ashen One?"
>"Yes?"
>"Sulyvahn hunted them to extinction in order to make stylish robes."
>"You see that dead waifu over there, Ashen One?"
>"Yes?"
>"Sulyvahn decided that his waifu was better, so he killed her."
>"You see that lack of poise, Ashen One?"
>"Yes?"
>"Sulyvahn's fault."

where is this cut dialogue

> "Oh child, who do you think replaced the first chest in the game with a mimic?"

>not resorting to all manner of depraved sex acts to stave off the hollowing
Wow dude you clearly know nothing of the Undead lifestyle

youtube.com/watch?v=tfj4BcET3I0

somewhere around the one minute mark.

>Confront True Sorcerer Sulyvahn, the Final Boss
>Tell him that he is like Seathe with his obsession of causing a new age
>"Foolish Ashen One, who do you think went back in time to give Seathe that idea?"

> Sulyvahn used poise to stoke the profaned flame.

>"DO YOU REMEMBER HAVING TO FARM ALL OF THOSE EARS, ASHEN ONE?"
>"IT WAS ME, BARRIUS! I WAS THE EARS

>The Profaned Flame is unending because it's just poising through time

The Abyss seems to have a rather arboreal theme in DaS3, fitting as how it's basically Dark Chaos and Chaos is also trees. So when Sully turns on the Abyss magic he grows tree wings. You see the same thing with the Pilgrim Butterflies and the Angels in the DLC

Damn, Elfriedes a babe.

Huh, that's still strange. How deep does the Sulyhole go?

You know it.

>Vilhelm tried as much as he could to protect this
F

Too bad she defied the Lord of Shit.

She rejected him anyway. He was the ultimate beta orbiter.

The badass chose a fine ass, but alas he fought we, the ass.

Well Yorshka popped out of someone. The only question is if it was a pyromancer or a trap god that knocked her up.

It was the Chosen Undead

Who's Elfriede's voice actress?

How do I have fun in Dark Souls?

>be one of the best knights in the land
>bitching set of armor
>personal knight of the Sisters of the Sable Church
>pretty much fall in love with the oldest
>she abandons the church and gives you a sword as compensation
>follow her to a frozen wasteland to protect her sweet ass anyway
I feel for him

I think you got it all wrong mate.

this fag obviously

Ring of concealment, Untrue White ring

Invade. Use spells Hidden Body and Chameleon.

Only backstabbing allowed. Have fun being a mad ninja.

Hnnnng I want to worship her thighs.

Im searching everywhere, and I seriously can't find an AoA credits page.

Like the Abyss Watchers taking up Artorias' will, I wish to form a Waifuguard in Vilhelm's memory.

>yfw you gang up on Friede and all you hear is squishy sounds and her pained moans

Uniform would be some sort of poncho no doubt.

Fashion souls with Vilhelm's top is fucking great.

If only the helmet wasn't the size of a grape.

Yeah, I looked all over as well, but couldn't find shit.

Mixing the sets is what fashion is all about.