The review that opened your eyes to gaming journalism

I'll never forget it. It was the year that those reviewer merchants opened my eyes. Soon after everyone realized they were shills

Other urls found in this thread:

ign.com/articles/2014/11/18/pokemon-alpha-sapphire-and-omega-ruby-review
ign.com/articles/2008/04/29/grand-theft-auto-iv-special-edition-review
archive.is/v4Qgg
destructoid.com/review-vanquish-186214.phtml
youtube.com/watch?v=PgOnyIt9_ic
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

I already didn't trust them, but that whole year really.
>Skyward Sword getting 10s
>Uncharted 3 getting 10s
>Skyrim getting 10s
>Mass Effect 3 getting 10s soon next year
All of a sudden it just became so transparent.

ign.com/articles/2014/11/18/pokemon-alpha-sapphire-and-omega-ruby-review

If you enjoy cinematic shit you may review Uncharted 3 10/10
If you enjoy western RPG even at below 30fps Skyrim is a 10/10

but fucking Zelda SS?

I still remember first reading that review when I was a mere highschooler, I was shaking with tears, how dare they? HOW COULD THEY ONLY GVIE IT A 10? IT DESERVED AN !! THOSE FUCKING SONYSHILLS!

This one
ign.com/articles/2008/04/29/grand-theft-auto-iv-special-edition-review

10/10 in every category for GTA IV

Laughable. It wasn't even as good as SA and VC.

Uncharted 2 was better than 3 by a mile.

IV is superior to V and to SA in every way possible

and this is coming from a person that is not a fan (and never was) of the GTA series.

>here is this shit taste opinion I have
>by the way, just so you know how much my opinion matters, I don't really like GTA games

WHAT the fuck did you just say?

Are you telling me GAMING journalism is corrupt? WHAT are you insane?

Metacritic is the best source if a game is good if it has a low score the game is shit! and metacritic would NEVER EVER lie to us! they are pure and unbrible and uncorruptble

>Sonic Unleashed on PS360 gets a lower score than Sonic 06
>But on Wii it gets a 7+ score
I'm not going to sit here defending Unleashed because I wouldn't even put it in my top 10 of Sonic's, but the PS3/360 version is better than the Wii/PS2 version and there is simply NO WAY you could honestly rate Unleashed as lower than Sonic 2006. IGN decided they just hated Sonic, and they rolled with it without any regard for the quality of the game itself.

At WORST it deserved a mid-to-low 6. But then, IGN are the people who peddle "Sonic was never good" despite the classics objectively selling well and getting good reviews all around, so I guess they've just hated the fucker since day one.

>someone who is not a fan of GTA series can't appreciate IV and have a fair opinion on the matter

That's why Sup Forums is the worst board of the entire Sup Forums.

kill yourself

not a nintenbro here, what's wrong with that zelda game?

>anti nintendo shills in preemptive damage control in case botw gets a 10

nothing, it'll get an 11/10 from IGN, the first ever in history

The Uncharted 3 Review was an insult, Uncharted 2 was the peak of the series.

can't stand Greg Miller or Colin Moriarty.

>IGN decided they just hated Sonic, and they rolled with it without any regard for the quality of the game itself.

Because they need to show that Mario is superior in every way

pic related.

>Sonic was never good!

Skyward Sword? It was a good game by all means, but it wasn't great my Zelda standards ( i know memes). It had the issue that the world was very closed off into 3 major areas, which were kind of small. Some of the challenge in previous Zeldas became abstract (?) and more often than not, easy. The game overall felt smaller.

n e v e r g o o d

These guys are just normie sonyggers though, They praise destiny and garbage like that.

SS is better than both those games, my guy.

We have to admit that the only two decent zelda games were the new 3DS and TP. The rest is Dark Cloud 1 tier.

8.8 and Kane & Lynch. Both ironically by same dude.

Greg Miller can be a fun wrestling character at a Paxmania, but otherwise his real life Sony shilling is absolutely fucking cringey, and I'm saying this as a Playstation fan. I LOVE YOU PS XOXO XD

I disagree, but you're entitled to that opinion.

unreal 2 got a near max score at gamespot
there was actually a lot of backlash at the time and they've removed and rerviewed it

what a crap game

I still don't get why people memed this.
There was way too much water with nothing interesting in RSE, and ORAS didn't fix it.
Even 7.8 is too high for a shitty remake

>Destiny
>Sony

They are EA/Microsoft/Bioware/Nintendo shills. The only Sony series they shill is Uncharted because it has multiculturalâ„¢ characters.

I don't remember a specific review but it was a combination of many triple AAA games from last gen that were absolute trash. Then I realized practically anything with a big name on it will get good reviews.

It was probably Asscreed 1 or Fallout 3 when I became really skeptical about review sites.

No not its not, the game was absolute fucking trash back then and it is still fucking trash now. I bought it back at launch at its still one the most disappointing games I ever bought.

Kane and Lynch
I mean shit they had to admit they fired him for a bad review and it doesn't get worse than that

A lot of the water routes are optional. Water surf speed was faster in the remakes, water encounter rates were lower (which was the main issue with the water in the original, let's be honest), and you could even cheat the system by getting a Sharpedo which had double-speed surfing.

Basically, the game is still shit, but for entirely different reasons. The water literally has nothing to do with why ORAS aren't great games.

Even FUCKING GAMESPOT was more decent than IGN

Yeah, GAMES FUCKING SPOT reviewed the game with professionalism compared to IGN.

>ut otherwise his real life Sony shilling is absolutely fucking cringey, and I'm saying this as a Playstation fan. I LOVE YOU PS XOXO XD


He was unbearable on IGN, the absolute worst. I'm glad I can avoid his unfunny youtube show.

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>too much water Lmao!11 xD

It was a hipster prostitute (she behaves in the same way as Alisson Rapp) who reviewed the game. What did you expect?

I think me3 was what really did it for me

>but fucking Zelda SS?
>h-h-hey no guys, w-w-we are shitting on zelda remember?

Also God Hand

Skyward Sword was still fantastic though. Every Zelda game is one of the best games ever made.

Reviewers have always overinflated scores, but you should've known that from the beginning.

>Agreeing with IGN in the most autistic review of the past 10 years

Just go fuck yourself.

Except even if it doesn't have emerald feature oit's still objectively better then RS which were, at worst, 7.5/10 games. ORAS isn't shit, you fags just are allowing your personal dissapointment to cloud your objective judgement of how good it is or not, which is exactly the thing that you fags also shit on journalists for doing.

None, I never gave a shit what reviewers said in the first place.

>objective judgement of how good a game is
am i getting memed here

>Uncharted 2 was the peak of the series
That's not saying much

>implying I agree with IGN reviews to attack me

read the fucking thread before posting cunt

I ironically replied becuase you were defending Uncharted and Skyrim, but shitting on Zelda even after a correct argument

implying you only want to shit on zelda as a troll
so fuck it, sage

Gave up on EA shortly after.

>Nintendo fans will paste Metacritic and IGN scores on the Switch hardware on Sup Forums in a few days

Who here will take a 1 week break from Sup Forums starting on March 3rd?

IGN has incredibly low standards
more news at 11

Awful core gameplay
Repeated areas
Incredibly boring story
Surpisingly boring soundtrack for a Zelda
One of the worst bosses in Zelda history is recycled three times

>take the inferior versions of 3rd gen for no good reason
>add copious amounts of handholding and straight up casualization
>and take out the game corner
>and a wonky-ass transition into 3D compared to HGSS
It's shit.

>so fuck it, sage
Against the rules.

>Against the rules.
saging a shitpost thread isnt against the rules

That hurts to watch

uncharted 3 was shit m8, mp is good but uncharted 2 beats u3 on many levels and mass effect 2 was better than mass effect 3 just because muh ending is locked behind dlc.

>Create 10 threads every day about how Horizon looks bad
>but if you dare to show that IGN shill for Nintendo you are a shitposter

Nintendo fans are the masters of double standards

>IGN don't even realize that by comparing to OoT they are breaking the OoT "Best Game of All Time" bubble

Feels good.

>Nintendo fans
>implying im a fucking nintendrone

>Delete shit post about my Horizon or I will cry!
God, like a clockwork

jeez I wonder who is after this thread

This. I would have given it a solid 9 after I finished it back when it was released. I adored it.

Fatfuck Jim Stirling's 9.5/10 review of Modern Warfare 2 was the moment I fully gave up even considering the opinion of
>gaming journalists

Describing the three hour campaign, that had the player doing such fun things as defending a Burger King
>Infinity Ward has proven that it can create interactive setpieces like no other, and there is no denying that the single-player campaign for Modern Warfare 2 is a roller coaster ride that never lets up.
>As a collection of events, Modern Warfare 2 is without compare.

Not even going into the complete misunderstanding in multiplayer that grenade spam was cut down at all in MW2. It's amazing how a little ad revenue or the occasional bit of exclusive info makes these writers shill so hard

archive.is/v4Qgg

I don't know. At the time, it was such a big fucking deal but after playing it myself, I was massively let down. It honestly probably deserves less than that, even.

On the other hand, Jeff Gertsmann did say that MP3's controls were "too good", which made no real sense, even coming from someone like me who hated that game.

That said, I can't think of any one review that made me realize mainstream reviewers are full of shit. It's been a massive collection of shitty reviews I've read over the years that's made me lose faith. Like DmC having a higher Metacritic score than either MGR or W101, for example or that one Gamespot review of DKC:TF where the reviewer sucked at the game and gave it a 6/10. Not to mention pretty much any big, hyped AAA release almost always garners 9/10-10/10 scores that they hardly ever deserve usually. I've also noticed that video game reviews period tend to be really amateurishly written and hardly ever tell you about the game or go really deep into its mechanics. Reviewers tend to have the most shallow understanding of a game's mechanics most of the time, which is why certain genres, like fighting games or cuhrayzee are never given more than 'good' scores generally.

>Like DmC having a higher Metacritic score than either MGR or W101

Because Dante is an edgy 17 year old and the female protagonist is a hipster with "occult" powers.

The IGN/Gamespot/Polygon mindset makes them shill for everything that features either hipsterism and edgy emo boys.

DmC was when I lost that last little bit of respect I had for video game reviewers.

I'd say OR/AS is the worst pokemon game to date, as much as I hate X/Y. X/Y can be given a little bit of flack because it's the first of a gen which can be rocky (D/P) and it's also a large tech jump as well. OR/AS has no excuse. It took the already easy R/S and made zero attempts to compensate for things like megas and actually made it that much easier because it straight up gives you the mega lati and that's also not accounting for things like exp. all and randomly butchered sections like granite cave.

Also the game is fucking hideous, top down looks so much better than this garbage. Straight up the one thing that can be considered an improvement in this game is dexnav and the ability to catch post game legendaries, which even then feels like a giant pain in the ass.

You see, the thing is most people agree with them. Have you ever considered that gaming journalism is simply not meant for you, but a different, much bigger audience?

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Honestly if he really likes overly sentimental games with lots of varied one-off mechanics, those scores make perfect sense.

No fuck you. I'm 30 years old and MW2 was the last good fps campaign. Come at me.

This

just convince yourself they were trying to show off the physics

It'd be fair score normally, but the scale of tgaming revies is so skewed that most gamers see a anything below an 8/10 as peice of shit.

Oh fuck, that reminds me of this dude's Vanquish review.

destructoid.com/review-vanquish-186214.phtml

>Despite the bombast and flair, Vanquish is actually a rather run-of-the-mill shooter that manages to devolve its genre, rather than evolve it. For instance, Sam's rocket gliding ability is governed by an energy meter. His melee attacks are governed by the same meter. Yes, you read that right, Sam actually needs energy to punch his opponents, and once he's landed a single successful punch, he can't glide away since the energy meter completely drains. Several times, I punched an enemy, failed to kill it thanks to Sam's inability to aim his punches properly, and was killed because I could neither defend myself or swiftly escape.

>So what does this mean for the overall game? It means that, when you get down to it, Vanquish is just another cover shooter with shallow gimmicks that have no applicable use. Sam's glide ability is only useful for escaping (or trying to), since there's no point getting up close and killed because you have no power left. Any thoughts you had of sliding toward an enemy, murdering him in a flurry of punches, and deftly sliding away like an awesome space ninja better be abolished from your head -- everything you do in this game makes you vulnerable, weak, and ultimately dead.

You can tell this dude sucked at the game and had no real understanding of how to really play it or of its advanced tech.

There really is a huge Western bias in modern vidya reviews.

More over, they generally suck at video games and only spend so much time with them before moving on to the next game, so they don't have the time to really improve or discover the depth that may lie beneath a game's surface. That's assuming that they're even looking for that sort of thing either.

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I remember it all so well.
>trailers show up and fans of the series are disappointed, 30 fps, shallow gameplay, etc.
>they bash Dante's new design as well, so journalists latch on to that one thing to denounce the fans as whiny crybabies
>game comes out and sells like absolute shit, said journalists start whining how it's the fans' fault for this "amazing" game being overlooked

How in the fuck can these people stay relevant when all they do is shit on consumers?

Haha he didn't play doom 4 what a nigo

Kane & Lynch 2.
That was the real shit.

I've played Sonic maybe twice in my life, what exactly is he doing wrong here? Just fucking up the controls somehow?

When is even the last time a AAA game got less than great reviews?
RE6?
It's just so odd that in every industry other than videogames throwing money at a project does not correlate with great reviews.
Hollywood blockbuster movies regularly get bad and mediocre reviews.
But in videogames AAA games pretty much never get anything less than really good to great reviews.
Something is rotten in the state of Denmark.

Shit I meant the first one.

If you wanna go through the loop you just keep holding right, keeping your momentum. Whoever is playing there thinks they have to switch directions on the d-pad as they get to the top of the loop.

Reminder that Jeff "you've felt the worst, now feel the Gerst" Gerstmann did nothing wrong by giving Kane and Lynch Dead Men a shitty score

IV had the worst soundtrack of the 3d era. worse than III and all of its unlicensed music.

Wasn't even a shitty score, just an average one.

>If you enjoy western RPG even at below 30fps Skyrim is a 10/10
What? No. Even if you like it there's no way you can't notice every dungeon being the same nord zombies in the same rooms assembled in a different order.

Are IGN really this fucking bad at video games? I hate Sonic but even I know you just hold right at a decent speed to get through these loops.
Do they even play video games?

he might as well have condemned it with how hard GameSpot was being pressured by the developer

What, so he's gaining speed in one direction, going up the loop, and then essentially slamming the break and going in reverse multiple times without realizing his fuckup? Wew lad.

The best ever sonic game is a 6/10, sorry.

This, it proved with no doubt reviews could be bought.

Interesting video related to this thread: youtube.com/watch?v=PgOnyIt9_ic

But Sonic 3 & Knuckles got 8's, 9's and 10's

What are you talking about fambo

Ive played like 2 combined hours of sonic games and demos in all my life, and this fucking hurts to watch

back when the gamecube got released and every game was 5/5. including the tech demo.

this is true you fucking inbred

God Hand is a shit game for dumpster babies. Difficulty should be a selectable measure that a player can manually choose. If they want an easy-going experience, they shouldn't have the challenge ramp up without their consent. Likewise, if someone's looking to be challenged, they're probably not gonna want the game to automatically lower itself if you fail. You don't learn from your mistakes when the game decides to hold back its punches afterwards.

gamespot isn't gamestop

Why does Dark Underbelly 4 come before 5?

It it was named anything besides Zelda, it'd have a 7 absolute tops