Daily Reminder

Dont lick your games kids

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nintenbros are human detritus

Anyone with a brain shouldn't be licking their shit.

Why the fuck are you licking cartridges anyway?

Giant bomb did it, said it tasted like shit, now everyone is doing it.

you should probably use materials that you're sure won't cause deadly allergic reactions. i mean, you can count on (most) adults not licking their games but what about kids?

That guy would get millions if he sued Nintendo

So we should sue that fat bastard?

Nintendo is the only game company actively practicing eugenics.

Darwin fails once again, maybe next time bud.

...

So close...
Isn't there something like conscience clause that allows doctors not to do things?

Sounds like an allergic reaction, otherwise he could sue Nintendo out the ass and I could have a reliable suicide method to fall back on.

I wonder how Nintendo feels knowing that their safeguard not only failed but also achieved the opposite effect for adults too.

There is, but only for abortion and euthanasia.

well considering you're not supposed to lick them in the first place
and that the breadth of range of things that people are allergic to
I'll give ninty the benefit of the doubt here.

bet this is the same fucker who put the joycon up his ass to see if it had sync issue

*wahoos painfully*

That's fucking stupid. should be extended to Darwin award-tier accident.

Why are people genuinely licking the cartridges? I dont think anyone licked the GB/GBA/DS/3DS cartridges, I dont think anyone licks SD cards, so why are they licking them like a bunch of brain dead retards?

>no preexisting conditions
>deathly allergic to bitterant

really gets that noggin joggin

guy probably got messed up on fentanyl-laced cocaine and wants to blame his fuckup on video games like so many others

dude pls real world doesn't work like your Sup Forums memes

because nintendo went out of their way to make them taste funny so kids wouldn't put them in their mousths.

aren't you curious as to exactly how it tastes?

just a little?

Holy shit, really?
Someone post the story pls

A little but I'm not going out of my way to lick it. If it wasnt because people announced it I wouldnt know it existed.

Wait? You are not licking your PlayStation discs, so they better glide into PlayStation's slit?

If that guy is that allergic to ingesting the stuff, wouldn't he have at least a small reaction to handling the cartridge?

Really activates the almonds...

That'd be like sueing a peanut butter company for buying and eating their stuff without you know you're allergic to peanuts.

I already know that shit tastes bad so why bother?

Would've been better if this dumbass just died. Who the fuck eats their game cartridges?

Not necesarilly, allergies are strange.

...

To tell you the truth...I am curious to taste the "most bitter material on the world".

>If it wasnt because people announced it I wouldnt know it existed.

yeah exactly. but people DID announce it and now you DO know. and if you have a game in your hand that thought might spring into your head.

because you don't know HOW bad

like sure you know strawbwrries taste sweet, does that mean you'll never eat one? of course not because it's got it's own unique flavour

people never did this for ds for 3ds why all this fuckery now?

...

>friend tells me that if you lick connector and it burns your tongue its a cheaply made connector
>thinking the entire time that there's got to be a less idiotic way to find out how cheap these are made

yeah dude i totally understand i lick all of my new games but i prefer the taste of sony games since they taste a little tangier than the rest

It only takes one retard to do something for the rest to copy.

Except not. Because peanut products cover their asses by saying "CONTAINS PEANUTS"

The Nintendo cartridges do not say "Contains Denatonium Benzoate"

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It was supposed to be a minor quiet innovation made exclusively for protecting a small child if they happen to try to chew on a cartridge. But lo and behold western videogame "journalists" have taken it upon themselves to blow this shit up and make a big deal out of it, even if it takes near fatal self harm to do so.

>deadly allergic
>still alive
Kys yourself Derrick

imports come in green tea kit-kat flavor

IMAGINE BEING AT COMPUTERS SO FAT YOU LOOK AND SEE FOOD

>putting the most bitter agents known to man on your games so that people get it on their fingers and then have a horrible time when it makes their way to their mouth
for what purpose

He did get CPR and intubation to barely save his life

Then again it could be bullshit

speaking of almonds, i have a "mild" allergy to them. i'm fine from touching them but they burn moderately going down if i eat them and i'm basically out in bed for like the next day with fatigue and diarrhea. other kinds of nuts are fine and apparently almond allergies are like an order of magnitude or two more rare than peanut allergies, which are the most common.
it took me a while to narrow down that it was actually almonds since i eat them so rarely.

...

well then you're in luck
*unzips dick*

Let me get this straight.
Nintendo is afraid of people choking on games, because choking kills people.
So they coat their games with denatonim benzoate, which kills people.

>licking a Switch game

But how can you lick something that doesn't exist?

anything can kill someone, i guess they figured the rate of people with allergies to the chemical would be lower than the rate of soccer moms suing them because their toddler choked on a cartridge.

he went into cardiac arrest because he realized he paid $300+tax for a system whose only game is also on Wii U

can you eat it though?

But all you have to do is print "Contains small pieces, not for children under age blah blah blah" on the boxes and you're covered. This is a sort of ludicrous idea. I mean, it's not like SD cards, or MicroSD cards use bitterants.

how about 99% chocolate

with rhubarb extract

AND daikon sauce

Still at the Anger stage Sonybro?

But then it will be 3 different things.
Not just one.

And what? Risk a sensible parent possibly not buying the game for their idiot kid?

cheaper not to have lawsuits than to win them

I already played BotW for free on a Wii U

There's zero reason to own a Switch

This. Some people are allergic to fucking water.

Switch won't be a mere Zelda machine forever my dude.

they're gonna miss out on that sweet ice pussy, then

That was a real article?

you're right, it's too busy screeching and bricking itself to play anything else

It's ok just follow this handy guide.

If this fucker was THAT allergic to this shit, merely handling the carts should be enough to trigger a reaction.

yes. it was not satire

delete this post

They're children, it's to be expected

>Real world doesn't work like memes
That's where you're wrong, kiddo

Marvelous

>Tfw some kid who went to my school keeled over dead after eating squid
>Heard about people who've suddenly become allergic to things they eaten before

Kill me. On the plus side I think I've actually tasted that bittering agent before. It's fucking awful and it takes forever to go away.

Tell that to kinder eggs.

The fuck is that?

>that feel when Jeff played it on their Switch Launch stream
>he kept enthusiastically reading the broken english

this is obviously satire

Nintendo cartridges are also not advertised as something that you're supposed to put in your goddamn mouth

>Nintendo games so bad they almost kill people

Lick more games Nintendawgs.

>Heard about people who've suddenly become allergic to things they eaten before
How exciting.

nobody would put them in their mouth if people didn't spread the word that they put nasty shit on them

If you're that allergic to something then you should just kill yourself desu. You're obviously defective as a human.

how are you still alive then

Archive.is or it didn't happen

There are people allergic to goddamn water.

What do you want from Nintendo? Retards memed the fucking "le cartridges taste bad XD" and now every sheep is following suit to fit in and perpetuate the meme.

That's not Nintendo's responsibility. That's some dumb shit logic. Next thing you tell me is you're gonna sue Apple because you ate an iphone battery and got poisoned.

>Heard about people who've suddenly become allergic to things they eaten before
jesus fucking christ

Then maybe you should shut your fat fucking mouth instead of persuading fellow idiots to put a chemical that's literally engineered to taste as terrible as possible in said fat fucking mouth

How do I find out what shit I'm deathly allergic to?
I know some allergies develop as you grow older.

>tfw my ferret bit my bomberman cartrige

This was his face after spitting and sneezing for a few minutes

read the article.
He really did it

no there are not you idiot, the human body is 60% water

whoever told you that one thinks you are one dumb motherfucker, and i don't blame them

I'd be lying if I said the thought of licking my BotW's cartridge didn't cross my mind.

for comedy purposes

What do I have to say to put a dildo up my ass then pass it off as a joke?

Huh. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Denatonium

You can get a panel of common allergens tested by your doctor if you ask (called the MELISA test or something in the US) but there's countless substances they'd never test for you could theoretically have an allergy to.

Water, no. But you can develop allergies to pretty basic shit. One case I recall reading was of a woman using transdermal estrogen patches. The adhesive in the patches was an irritant, and provoked a cross-sensitivity to estrogen itself. eg, the immune system decided it was time to kill every fucking estrogen molecule it came across. The sensitivity reversed when she stopped using the patches.

it's obviously making fun of people "using the switch controller wrong" by using it in an even more wrong way

the dildos you stick up your ass are being used for their intended purpose