DWARF FORTRESS STORIES THREAD

Get in here Urist!

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I have no stories. I dig into a mountain, make a bunch of beds and all my dwarfs get were-beasted within 2 hours

I've got one

>download the game because autists write elaborate stories about it
>run it
>I don't know what's going on
>I don't know what any of the buttons do
>the graphics suck and require you to use your imagination

ah yes very good

Maybe you should try building a wall to keep them out?

Imagination can be a good thing in games, you just have to give it a chance. Probably took me about 5 or 6 times of deleting and redownloading the game to actually get into it fully.

Or, what if he dug a hole that they couldn't get over?

Really makes you think...

I have one myself!

>come on Sup Forums dot org foward slash vee
>expecting riveting video game related discussion
>come into a dwarf fortress stories thread
>read absolute snot drivel written by somebody with the mental age of an orange
>re-evaluate my choices in life

ah yes very good

Werebeasts can jump/climb over walls and jump over holes now.

Close and lock your doors. They're coming.

if it doesn't click in one go it's not worth my time

Basically just slather the entrance to your fort in cage traps and prep a hospital to treat the wounded, and then contain the fuckers who get infected.

Calm down, Autismo.

but can they open doors?

Here come the bantz!
Actually though, have any stories?

Cant you just build a wall and put a roof on it then call it a day? If not then shit, the original guy needs to stop embarking in places with were-beasts

What if it's a massively large hole? What if you put a wall behind it?

how do i play dwarf fortress?

Your best shot will be Youtube.

Pick up PeridexisErrant's Starter Pack off the forum and play along with the guide on the wiki.

Once you have a basic grasp of the UI and h ow things work, everything else will come in time.

Yeah one time I created an adventurer and set off to explore the wilderness. I came across a pack of faggot wolves and they managed to take one of my eyes from me so from that day on my dude swore vengeance on all wolves ever.

Went back to town to pull up some better gear, ended up rocking a nice long 2handed sword with a small buckler attached to my left forearm, could still use two hands like this you see. This was before the advent of boogeymen so travelling alone at night wasn't as terrible but the downside is it was also before the addition of companions, so in my quest against furred bastards I was alone.

Many a night I would travel the land fucking up wolves, cutting them in half as they jumped at me and smashing them down with my buckley if they flanked. Every fight my adventurer lost a little more though, a few more cuts and maybe a lost finger. One day a wolf managed to speed past my defenses and took my remaining eye out, I was completely blind but still fighting the wolfpack using the sound and guesswork to strike out at them, somehow I managed to survive it just by grabbing the fuckers and running them through with the sword.

Took a short walk over to a nearby stream all bloodied and battered, lay my back against a tree under the cool setting sun and closed my eyes one last time.

Nah, they can climb z-levels. You gotta build a decently tall wall.

I can't wait till goblins can start burrowing under walls.

That's pretty badass, not gonna lie. Did you ever check if dwarves made engravings about them or anything about them in legends mode?

Nice story. What a hilariously pointless life that guy led.

God no... I prefer my goblins to stand retardedly outside my fortress thank you very much

One of my adventurers fought a bandit group of around a dozen. I was suceeding in defeating them, though got heavily injured and mutilated. The boss was the last one left, after a while neither of us had usable limbs, and were in immense pain. We fell on the ground, legs chopped off or tendons torn, bitting and headbutting eachother.
Most of the fight us both were passed out, with brief moments of consciousness to attack the other. The boss tried to flee, but couldn't drag himself far. I bit his neck, and he finally bled out.
I tried to crawl back to a village, then wait to see how well I healed, and probably retire the adventurer. A bandit was passed out the whole time, caught up to me and smashed my head with a rock.

That's.....unfortunate to say the least. Kinda funny though

Nah I didn't really look into legends mode, and they were only wolves he fought so nothing exceptionally noteworthy like striking down a named hydra. He was also a Human male so maybe dorfs wouldn't be as likened to using any tale he has on their wall deco.

I think now with the tavern updates I should be able to run around bragging about my stupid accomplishments and maybe stories can trickle down through the ages.

Yeah the sheer dumbness is that he probably wouldn't have lost his eyes if he had a decent full-helm.

Goblins now climb up walls that aren't too tall and can hop over 2-wide pits.

The suffering that is to build above ground forts.

But it must be done to reclaim the world from elves.

Yeah, they are for sure nothing like they used to be, and can actually be scary now. Still, if you design right you can keep them out. I doubt anything short of lava-lined walls would keep out digging goblins however.

The most likely solution for digging goblins is going to be building deep foundations with water that comes out if they breech it.

I'd be more worried about the eventual inclusion of goblins using fucking siege engines like catapults to fuck your walls up.

Better have a good military I guess. Or a moat. Or a lava moat.

Yeah, that'll really screw stuff up if the siege equipment is good. That'll make some players rage for sure. The game will definitely be more difficult, which is saying something for sure.

Made a fort where I got bored and dug into hell. Here are some replays I recorded:

mkv25.net/dfma/movie-2427-myfirstdemoninvasionpt1
mkv25.net/dfma/movie-2428-myfirstdemoninvasionpt2
mkv25.net/dfma/movie-2429-myfirstdemoninvasionpt3

After all this, I made an adventurer and tried to get back there. On the way there, I found a castle that was completely empty except a rat demon who was taken prisoner. I freed him and he joined him. He was completely ridiculous; whenever I entered combat, he would just move instantly to the enemy and break a skull every turn.

As I got closer to my fort, I started encountering demons in the wild. Thank fuck for my rat demon companion, because they were just as OP as he was. One combat, one of the demons (that was a ghost or something) instantkilled my buddy, and I started running. Every time I got pulled into combat, I managed to hide and escape (I had stealth maxed out from hiding every fight) I ended up with my back to a frozen lake. I escaped on to the lake, and walked forward for a few days.

Then spring came, the lake melted, and I drowned from exhaustion before I reached the shore. Color me impressed

>dragon comes to my fort
>not prepared for it at all
>call everyone inside, raise the bridges, and seal everything up
>everyone is trapped in their own fort while the megabeast skulks outside
>this goes on for a few in-game weeks
>have a plan
>dig a tunnel under my walls, through to my catacombs, which are outside the fort
>quickly built a cage trap on the surface
>as the dragon approaches, quickly call the mechanic back into the fort
>I trapped the dragon!
>my fort will now be undefeatable
>train the dragon for war and chain him up outside the gates
>the moment I have been waiting for, a goblin seige arrives
>the dragon melts the goblins, but sets the grass around his own feet on fire
>the dragon suffocates on the smoke and dies

Stopped playing DF for a while after that

Holy shit kek, that's the biggest letdown ever. I can understand why you would quit desu.

Man, adventure mode seems like a lot of fun. I haven't tried it yet, but I'm thinking about it.

Not a story but what i did last time i played Dorf Fort.

I wonder if they fixed the combat of adventure mode by now, last time i played it was a clusterfuck of people crying or not fighting back at all.

What's annoying will be rebuilding after the siege, if goblins punch open your walls like cheese. If there's a way to define the fortress design, and a single command to "rebuild whatever's fucked up" I wouldn't mind as much.

That would definitely be nice, as opposed to meticulously placing block after block back in holes that the goblins made.

I think an air gap would work fine, because it blocks the goblins' pathing. Unless they can build makeshift bridges. Which will probably happen.

My first true attempt to play this game I killrr a rat in my fledgeling cave and it caused a deadly plague which left no survivors

Plague? I thought miasma only stink up the place and don't carry diseases (yet). Did that change?

Well it killed all my dwarves after a while and I was too inexperienced to do amything but watch