Let's design the peak anti-Sup Forums game

I'll start with the obvious

>Open world
>Protagonist is black
>Several female characters are 9/10s instead of 10/10s

>Less than 2 hours long
>Western developer

>crafting
>survival
>romance options but only for worst girls

>procedurally generated
>quick time heavy
>cinematic

>2 hours long
>episodic

Xbox Exclusive

>game is meant to be played

Hi!

>Actually fun to play

>characters walk faster than the player's walk speed but slower than the player's run speed
>lots of segments like this where you follow someone and talk to them, like in asscreed

>I dake it he was a agreeable? :DD
>OHYES :DDD

>HAS HE BEEN INFEGDED?
>OHYESS :DDD

I take id u disguss mader wid senador :DDD

What the fuck is wrong with you? Been drinking antifreeze or what?

Is this about Drumpf or is it about Ben and Jerry's banning two scoops of the same flavour in Australia?

>2016 graphics
>You can romance a male

WHY GONDAIN IT? :DDD

>Not romancing the genderqueer dragonfluid gatorade-kin with multiple headmate syndrome

>Lead developer is EvaXephon

ebin :DDDDD

>indonesian fflag
What did they mean by that?

Loot boxes

DDDDDDRRRRRRUUUUUUMMMMPPPPPPFFFFFFFF

>game with great scenario and deep complex characters

Sup Forums says it's kino. isn't Sup Forums the actual cancer?

oh fug :DDD

Reported

It's already been made.

...

>Challenging skill based gameplay
>Single player only

This is a thread about making a game Sup Forums would hate, not love.

...

Sup Forums likes games that don't allow them to play on easy difficulty, not challenging games.

>cool, powerful recurring villain that can eventually join your party
>the only way they'll join your party is if you learn their pronouns: zhe/zhir/zhideyzhideyzhideyzho

Watch dogs 2?

> fun
Get that shit out if here kid, before we fite IRL

>Open but empty as fuck world
>Protagonist is a black guy constantly fighting white people acting like a strawman
>Ugly looking characters with fucked up anatomy, mostly spics
>90% of "gameplay" are easy quick time events
>Rest of the "gameplay" is Overwatch type of gameplay, basically press X to win
>Story focus but most of the story is cliche as fuck and stolen from recent popular netflix show with added progressivness
>Constantly offered choices on what to do but they don't actually do anything
>Time limited underwater escort missions where the person you're helping has fuck all health and rushes into combat instantly
>When some character leaves your party due to story reasons you lose all equipment you gave him
>Through the whole game you're forced to have a sidekick with retarded AI and fuck all health, if he dies it's game over
>No bossfights
>Enemies have one hit kill abilities they spam
>Shitton of enemies at once for artificial difficulty
>Long as fuck cutscenes
>Unskippable cutscenes
>Checkpoints before cutscenes
>Bulletsponge enemies
>You defeat the main antagonist in a cutscene

>completely linear and mechanically incredibly bland TPS
>"whitey is evil" story
>yet you play as a whiny white guy
>in the story you almost act like a literal slave to some jewish/black/hispanic dudes/women/trannies
but they are still regarded as heroic, even if they commit incredibly vile actions
>unskippable cutscenes
>true ending only unlocked by finishing game in all difficulties
>pay2skip the gameplay dlc mandatory for installment
Now for the multiplayer part:
>only 2 game modes, deathmatch and team deathmatch
>no character customization, yet you are assigned a completely random character which you can't change (unless you purchase the "character swapping dlc)
>preorder weapons are so ridiculously OP that no other gun is worth using
>no melee option
>weapon pack dlc comes out
>all of them are even more worthless than the dlc guns

>final boss is some random white guy

Gone Home already came out

>the game is really, really good
>the antagonist is an african man, with an intricate and believable backstory, and the greatest bossfight of the year
>The game sells incredibly poorly because of immense SJW backlash because they are upset that a black dude could be evil

>open world mmorpgtqaa++
>monthy fee in developed world
>f2p in Brazil, Russia, etc.
>no dedicated servers
>no custom servers
>DENUVO
>Only On Origin(tm)
>requires uplay
>localized by Nintendo Treehouse
>directed by Randy Pitchford
>written by Anthony "Daily Reminder You're Not Anthony" Burch
>featuring lead character designer Jennifer Hepler
>unskippable cutscenes
>gameplay is all QTE
>dating sim game elements
>best girls cannot be dated
>lose points for turning down gay advances from party members
>get beat up by 100 lbs proud black woman
>main villain is Donald Trump
>contains Reddit and Tumblr memes

> final boss is some random white guy just trying to make ends meet.
> protag defeates him by breaking up his marriage and driving him into an alcoholic frenzy
> ending cut scene is a crying child asking why you did what you did.
> "pffft. No hard feelings, kid." before you slap him across the face.

A Gearbox original.

>Western dev
>Half of the content locked behind DLC, of which another half is preorder bonus
>Microtransactions
>Requires uPlay or Origin
>Console exclusive
>Open world or extremely linear
>Strong SJW pandering
>Very easy
>Contains lots of normie memes and spawns even more new ones
>Cinematic and has lots of quicktime events
>Generic orchestral soundtrack but with mainstream Electronica theme song
>Openly bought reviews
>Agressively marketed by Streamers and Youtubers
>Extreme viral marketing on Sup Forums
>Excessively celebrated by normalfags
>Stupid story that is perceived as "deep" by aforementioned normalfags

A true monster.

Benis :DDD