Let's test the autismo

>You can work for us, but you can never visit Sup Forums again. You have to convert to Reddit.

Do you accept?

Other urls found in this thread:

valvesoftware.com/company/Valve_Handbook_LowRes.pdf
twitter.com/NSFWRedditGif

Whats the pay like?

who the fuck are you?

why the fuck would i want to work for a company as mismanaged as valve?

good luck I'm behind 7 balaclavas

i play tons of dota and cs so i basically already am full riddit
i hear the pay is decent at valve

There's work that gets done at Valve?

I'll just post on Sup Forums when I'm off the clock. What's the problem?

i wouldn't work for the fat jew even if he was paying me for just breathing because valve and steam go against my values.

REALLY depends on the pay.
Also i could just use cripple chan.

I'd rather not find out that all the expected games that are supposed to be in the works are no more than ideas on a white board and have been for years.

NO. You have to use Reddit. No *chan* ever.

You're not gonna dictate my personal time to me, you fat fuck.

You don't seem to know what it is like working for Valve... they force you to take holidays and shit

>valve
>"managed"

>"the janitor position is minimum pay"

>You don't seem to know what it is like working for Valve

They're not going to be monitoring my internet usage at home.

Also
>they force you to take holidays
That's very common.

can't i stay outside both?

>work
haha no, I'm not a wagecuck

Holy shit I get to leave Sup Forums? Sign me the fuck up, just don't expect me to actually use reddit

[citation needed]

This is the correct answer.

okay
>*browse r/Sup Forums*

shit
but you get to vac ban people on steam

paid holidays?

これ

Anyone? With no repercussions?

I'll fucking do anything for that

Reddit's interface is shitty. I'll just start my own BBS with blackjack and hookers.

>"you can never drink alcohol ever again."
>lol ok I'll show you
>*drinks 10-year-old coke*

no you have to have a reason, albeit that reason could be "he said fuck three times"

your not allowed on Sup Forums so your able to do it but can't shitpost about it later

valvesoftware.com/company/Valve_Handbook_LowRes.pdf
Read this and learn the dankest Valve stereotypes

>Implying reddit isn't just one giant shitpost

>implying I haven't read the handbook multiple times while autistically fantasizing about sucking gaben's fat cock

touche

Yes. Literally zero reason to stay here.

>working for valve
no sank u

i'd rather work for a video game developing company than a video game retailer, sir

Why exactly would I want to work for the company that is literally the cancer of PC gaming and made three of the most overrated franchises in history?

>Can't post on reddit-lite anymore
oh no!

The best first level in any game, ever.

>Perfectly demonstrates how a Sonic game should play.
>Hundreds of potential methods by which to maximize your speed and reach the end goal.
>No retarded design decisions that purposely force the player to slow down and play the game like a traditional platformer.
>Music that perfectly fits the tone of the level.
>Re-playable hundreds of times without ever becoming stale.

2:10:95, beat my time faggots.

>When you accidentally post a reply to a thread instead of starting a new one.
Fuck

what year is it?
Fuck off, nostalgia cuck

When do I get to join?

never. you're on Sup Forums. too late.

I'd rather be a nostalgiacuck than a greasy numale faggot that plays dirt like The Last of Us and Uncharted 4 and thinks he's a real gamer.

No. I'm a programmer and I ideally want to work on game development one day. Were I to work for Valve, I'd probably only be able to program frontend crap for Steam that has nothing to do with actual logic but only with visual appearance and minimal functionality.

Sure it would give me more spare time considering I only use reddit for spaceporn and gakinotsukai

whats the downside?

Pretty sure Valve employees get access to the entire steam library

There is no difference between the two sites. Which pays more?

>b-but gaben! ubisoft employees get to browse both!

...

I'll take the job!
Then sue your ass when you try to enforce your shit.

>implying I don't already browse leddit at work on PC and Sup Forums on mobile because you fucks can't stop posting milkies or other shit on a blue board

You brought the reddit migration onto yourselves with your constant low quality shitposting, it's just not feasible to browse Sup Forums at work anymore

just browse Sup Forums in incognito you fuck head

>pic

SHUT
IT
DOWN
THE
GOYEM
KNOW

It's going to be in the contract you won't read, dumbass. They, once you sue them, you're going to start eating you're own shit for food, from lack of money.

>implying the HTTP request to access man shits on baby.webm still doesn't go through IT

u dun goofed

I'd quit Sup Forums for a nice paycheck and to be in a field I'm actually interested in. Easily.

Fuck no

I will accept on the condition that we actually fucking make Half Life 3 and Left 4 Dead 3 and release both before 2021

Not like there's any difference between Sup Forums and Reddit these days anyway