Crusador Kings 2

Oh boy, what have I gotten myself into.

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youtube.com/watch?v=RR2-ElIe37I
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The destiny to remove Moor from peninsula

>actually playing the tutorial
wew

...

>what have I gotten myself into
The more you play, the more you will suspect your IRL siblings. Or you might fuck them.

CK2 is hands down the game that I've had the most fun playing.

That post tells me a lot about you user. You're alright by me cunt.

I've played 1300 hours on ck2 AMA

Leonese manifest destiny, my dude.

I played so much but I've just gotten sick of it. Once you start blobbing and have an empire it just becomes too dull. And I can't not blob because my neighbours annoy me.

>Hasn't pirated all the DLC
(lol
But seriously, if you do don't use the new portraits, they fucking suck. The only good ones are the black portraits, all others just look bad. I think the artist must have fucking died or something.

>starting as an iberian catholic

Oh boy are you in for a bad time.

Play as Norse and watch your blob get split up every time a character dies so that you have to scheme, fuck, kinslay and fight wars to get it back.

>assassinating your firstborn grandson because your secondborn grandson has better stats and will make a better ruler
good fucking game

I have 1000+ hours in game and never once played a filthy Muslim.

The only time I did, I died of cancer after 3 generations

>being a Norse pagan and kidnapping the king of frances wife and making her a concubine
10/10 game

You don't know the half of it.

>not ironically playing tutorials

I already did. Started out as Saxony. Denmark declared War on Sweden so I used my invasion to invade Denmark and won the war just after he subjugated Sweden. Half of Scandinavia and northern Germany under my control after a few years. I raid West francia, he tries to inavde, I let attrition do the work and his wars against the Iberians and revolts + wars with Middle Francia occupy him and conquer some slavs.

I racked up piety from burning churches, reformed the faith, went feudal and got rid of gavelkind. 200 years later christianity is gone and I'm back to fighting muslims.

Just keep playing. System heavy games require time to understand how they work but then it becomes second nature. CK2 is also easier than other Paradox because you're working with quantifiable like individuals and shit, and not some idea of embodying a state.

One counter intuitive thing I have to point it to you that it is MUCH easier to start as a well established larger country than some small one-two provinces country in the middle of nowhere. You want options and interactivity, not being stuck for 70 years developing.

it's actually hard as fuck. the abassid sultanate or whatever shitfuck is occupying iberia together with your greedy ass neighbours make it quite challenging.

How do I marry this cunt?

I actually like CK2.

But it is NOT a grand strategy game.

It's "The Sims:Medieval Inheritance Law Edition" with somehow MORE DLC than EA could even dream of making. But I like the sims, so it's fun to me. You pick a dude, set some goals for yourself and experience the Incestuous Magic play itself out while practicing a casual family eugenics program

Search your heart. You know it to be true.

I started my first game of CK2 as a relative of the Ruler of Aragon and did just fine. Managed to take the throne and expand both the Kingdom and the Dynasty. It was a lot of fun while also presenting a worthwhile challenge.

Maybe it's harder now with all the extra DLC.

>It's "The Sims:Medieval Inheritance Law Edition" with somehow MORE DLC than EA could even dream of making.

But they already did.

>dat OST
youtube.com/watch?v=RR2-ElIe37I

Click on the other circle with the question mark and add your character's face in there.

>Be mongol
>declare self Genghis Khan
>Persian emperor decides this is the perfect time to execute his wife, who happens to be my sister
>Invade his kingdom, raze his lands and slaughter his people until persian culture is removed from the world, have his entire family trampled by horses, cut out his eyes and then send him out to tell the world what happens to those who cross the greatest of khans

best part is, real life genghis khan would have reacted in exactly the same manner

Why is uniting the Empire so hard? How do I prompt a Chaos invasion so I can get the intrigue option?

SUMMON

Aside from the DLC part which I agree with, couldn't you argue that "The Sims:Medieval Inheritance Law Edition" is the closest Medieval GSG you can get?

I mean that's mostly what that age was.

That image is so right. One of my favorite playthroughs was random Muslim count to Caliph and Sultan of Syria and Jerusalem.

the most fun i've had was scheming as a little count in france and eventually end up with my descendants as emperor of the byz through marriage and assassinating

>when you kidnap your king and force him to sign a document wherein he abdicated the throne to you

course because I was widely known as a scheming snake the kingdom disintegrated instantly but hey, its the thought that counts

You've gotten yourself into the great tradition that is autism
docs.google.com/document/d/1HPD3CSQ_fCC0Atw6k5Gkaj7u541oDFrttkhjb86QVaE/edit?usp=sharing
>36,811 words in 57 pages for 684 years
docs.google.com/document/d/1syVzNITq6_ddv7zHvjuesHv4jxXepzk3AiUMTBXkp-Y/edit?usp=sharing
>46,992 words in 73 pages and I'm only at 1147AD

>only persian culture is wiped out
wouldn't the real genghis make sure that persia doesn't actually exist anymore

>basilisa of byzantine empire marries heir to france

fuck me

Satanists best cult

you let vlad declare an invasion on you then beat him back. it's undead or chaos invasion, and chaos invasions pretty much never happen since demon princes form extremely rarely.

Rome Reborn

only bad if you're not white
this just mean more politik to be done down the road

>empire of the greeks
>white

that also happened, thought that was pretty much implied by the invasion of persia
annexed the shit out of them, then set every province to razing, executed every single persian in the empire etc.

>Revolt for France happens
>Greeks still keep a large part because of De Jure
I hate it

...

that's when you open up the console, to prevent stupidity like that

...

>italy just became jewish
Monks and Mystics was a mistake.

WE

On the contrary, starting as an irish count is the official easy mode. As long as you don't play in the time of the viking raids.

Still no naval battles?

>blobbing

You're missing the entire point of the game.

Get HIP, start as the Paulician one county militant Christian sect and work your way up to Byzantine emperor.

ayo yo jelly white boy?

>want to play as a comfy count in a remote part o the kingdom
>scheming factions almost always give me control of the local duchy because reasons

>kingdom of jerusalem is a merchant republic
muh shekels

Why are skaven so rude

>op super best Hermetic scholar ruler
>oh boy, I'm gonna do a thesis on the universal panacea and I'm gonna crush it with all this learning stat. Now I will finally have IMMORTALITY
>it just gives a health bonus

You know what, your secrets are bullshit hermetic """mages"""

>be comfy lord of Palermo in Sicily
>emperor makes me viscount of the Balearic Isles for no reason and have to deal with those rebellious fucks

you do know that this manuscript carries on to the next ruler which can then make another manuscript and so forth

also all the other inventions you can create (like the compass and even a big-ass catapult) carry over as well

result is that after a couple of hermetics rulers all your stats are locked at 25+

How do they always know when you're gay. It's supposed to be a secret dammit.

Yeah, but if you do it for a few generations you'll have a bunch of various stat bonuses

Genghis Khan did worse. Millions upon millions died because an emissary was disrespected.

can i remove christo cucks from europe with my andalusia islam state?

Why play this shit when you can play Total Warhammer?

W-what do

korn is boring, nurgle and tzeentch are a lot more fun.

>attack caravan belonging to the motherfucking mongol empire
>genghis khan himself sends his personal emissaries to sort this mess out
>execute the emissaries, the caravan and send back their heads

I wonder at what point the Khwarezmids figured out they fucked up, badly

ur a cute grill wait for slaneesh fuck khorne

A Game of Thrones best mod

>playing tutorial
t. paradoxplaza

WHY WONT THIS GAME GO ON SALE REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

nomad armies with a good commander are just downright silly
sure it's historically accurate but if I was a player on the receiving end of this, I'd get mad

it's on sale all the time
>not pirating it

>lost interest in Europa Universalis because of all the DLC in IV
>lost interest in Victoria 2 because I just got bored of it
>never got into HoI
>still love CK2

More role-play faggotry

t. has it open right now trying to build the basis for the greatest chaos resisting empire the world has ever known under a lesbian amazon matriarchy. But first I got to find this damn fountain of youth to preserve my good looks.

Should have been there with CKI when they were op as fuck and they didn't take attrition damage, but your units took attrition damage equal to the amount of units you had in a province plus the amount they had. And the Map stopped a lot further west so they'd ruin Persia or whoever was there and then rape your Crusader Kingdom.

Just pirate the dlcs for paradox games

>heavy cav as mongol
nani?
I'm surprised you were able to proc the OP tactic with that many heavy cav

I meant I don't like some of the changes they made with a lot of the DLCs in IV. The changes in CK2 have been mostly fun.

on sale for 0.00 from rezmar

>spend so much time and effort making the perfect genetic dynasty
>heir turns out to be a demon spawn

I hate the decadence shit muzzies have.

it's a different style

I'm fairly sure pure heavy cavalry is the most OP build possible.

nothing beats proccing op harass tactics with your archers followed by hilariously op charge tactics with your heavy cavalry

you actually WANT a good number of heavy cavalry as mongols these days

you can get the summer collection key from kinguin for like $20 that has the game and about 70% of the DLC

Play Victoria 2 instead

>Khan of the Golden Horde
>Finnic avatar

when did this happen. I haven't looked at tactic since the time they nerf archer retinue.
Mongol had that tactic that reset phase to skirmish again so heavy cav was useless

WE WUZ MONGOLS AND SHEET

>play as a merchant prince Shiite assassin grandmaster that's secretly a Jew
>rolling in money from all them trade ports
>tech bonus events keep firing up cause of your fellow Jew advisors
>slowly infesting the HRE blob with your kin by forcing rulers to marry their offspring to yours
I love CK2

I just want to be a ruler Ragnar would have been proud of.

due to a persistent bug that tactic is impossible to trigger if you have horse archers in your army

so it's much better to go with a good balance of units to ensure you soften up your enemy properly during extended skirmish, then have a good ol' heavy cavalry charge to finish off whatever's left

Liquor

Too bad the remaining 30% still cost 100+

>Norman

Best culture in the game desu senpai.

it should tide you over until the rest goes on sale on steam

>buying Paradox DLC
lmao

oh it had another condition of terrain that most of europe isn't composed of.
Make sense