Quick rundown: >Old skool fantasy RPG dungeon crawler >Turn based combat so you can take your time twitch ADHD babbys need not apply >Can ride turtles >Mostly developed in mid-90s >Original targeted for 3Q 1997 release >Madman dev Cleve has worked on game ever since to perfect it >Has missed every release date so far over the decades >But this time is different because he actually seems serious and is excluding features to make release >Cleve will surely not let us down this time >Cleve is a Neanderthal locked in eternal kulturkampf with Sapes (non-Neanderthal Homo Sapiens) >Cleve is an American who moved to Australia after the 1992 LA riots to escape Sapes >Codes Grimoire in a self-built nuclear bunker >Took down a homosexual cabal trying to make Wizardy 8 into gay furry fantasy with penisaur & gaping anus monsters >Rescued countless runaway rentboys from the clutches of Max Phipps
I know these threads are attracting a lot of hot memers, but I for one will actually be purchasing and playing this game if it comes out. Godspeed.
Brandon Long
>links to an IP address in the URL
Jayden Nelson
>relies on the DNS server to do everything Kids these days, can't work out anything for themselves.
Brandon Butler
Grimoire threads actually led me to finally finishing Wizardry 6 and importing my party into 7. If Grimoire is even half as good as 7, I'll gladly buy it
Kevin Morgan
HYPE!!!! I am literally shaking in anticipation of this game. I don't think the world will ever be the same after it is released.
Matthew Torres
I didn't even know about the genre or that I wanted to play it until Grimoire threads here
Elijah Richardson
Why does he think he's a Neanderthal?
Wyatt Edwards
> It's the year 2034. After the long grimoire war, caused by the shortage of Grimoire game by Cleve Blakemore, we live in a world with no rules. It's the law of the jungle here, in the country of Australia. The major city have been nuked, the other country wanted to steals Australia supply of Grimoire, but Australia was already going to shit, because male of fertile age started playing it and suddenly saw the light. There were no mores man to mates with because they were either playing Grimoire, fighting for it, or trying to get it. Today, we're in a shortage of Grimoire. We'll have nothing to play. There is no videogame as big as Grimoire. We're all in our basement, enjoying the game and our waifu, but our disk copy of grimoire are getting broken. We can't leave, because there are the tribes of women living outside that are driven by sexual lust because of the lack of men turning their attention to waifu and grimoire, that's how i lost my brother, captured by one of them women and killed himself after being raped two time in a row. Would rather have played Grimoire and fucked waifu than real disgusting women.
Nathaniel Powell
FIFTEEN HOURS
Carson Campbell
>being brazilian >expecting this for ages >40$ >about 125 hue money sad to say this but i'll pirate this one
Benjamin Garcia
Same
Luis Myers
I'm rich and I'm still going to pirate it
Juan Sanders
600 hours monkeyman
Brandon Morgan
...
Justin Johnson
Wasn't it August 1st yesterday?
Cameron Bailey
>have to sleep during release because of work next morning IT'S NOT FAIR
Andrew Allen
Timezones
Sebastian Hill
Probably just your time zone, it's still the first for me.
Jayden Jones
you live in a dumb timezone
Isaiah Nelson
I can't sleep. What if it actually happens? I mean I did just sleep for 7 hours but now it's 3 in the morning and I can't sleep
Lincoln Gutierrez
well, if it happens I'll buy it, play it for 0.1 hours, leave a terrible review and then refund it. but it won't happen and you all know it.
Luis Barnes
THE INCLINE COMETH
Angel Morgan
Grinwah not only delivers 600 hours of gripping gameplay, it also contains an encyclopaedia of life advice to sort your yourself out and attain Neanderthal gnosis.
Levi Watson
This is mostly really good advice. Especially the children part.
>still no upload info on steamdb >b-but the site hasn't been updated yet >last update was a few hours ago There is no game.
Matthew Anderson
Can someone fill me in on this game? Is it actually supposed to be good or what? im sorta craving a dungeon crawler
Adam Wilson
No, it doesn't exist
Evan Cox
can i play as an 8 foot tall ORC warrior in this and crush my enemies skulls beneath my feet
Andrew Barnes
If it existed would it be a good game?
Anthony Russell
I have yet to see any of the Cleve-apologists refute this
it's a meme game that will never come out because it doesn't exist. these threads are just platforms to post the insane "developer"s delusional rants on RPGCodex. play EO or DT2-2 instead
Julian Thompson
no, what you see on the screenshots is just a texture-modded early Alpha of Wizardry 7, which the "dev" stole from Sir-Tech when he was fired.
Gavin Davis
Legend of Grimrock is better.
Dominic Jones
He just prepping the package. Prepare to be BTFO, stupid sapes.
Jace King
Try saying that outside of an anonymous forum and see how you come out of it. Cleve has successfully sued people for defamation for the exact FALSE and UNTRUE claims you're making now, and I won't hesitate to take you on. Don't test him.
Juan Jones
I am waiting for the release date just to see the delusion and disappointment in the posts in the Steam forums.
Levi White
What the fuck are these things?
Charles Gonzalez
Aliens. Are you blind?
Oliver Sullivan
Remember that you only have the first week to get the game at a discounted price.
> I have decided it is just a nice thing to do for people who have been waiting years to play my game if I offered a 10% discount on the game during it's first week. After this ends, I want to assure anyone waiting for the game that Grimoire will never, ever sell at a discount at any time it is on the Steam store ever again. I won't permit it to be sold below it's retail value for any reason. I am too proud of my finished product to permit it to be turned into simply another commodity in a Steam sale. If Valve ever decides that sales of the product no longer justify it having a page then I will move it to another venue - but as the author I will never offer my game at a discount again anywhere.
Jonathan Thomas
FOURTEEN HOURS
Ryder Mitchell
> 64 intelligent NPCs with 8000+ Words in Vocabulary
> Chat box with choices > IA
No doubt this guy is 180 IQ.
William Reed
>Looks like it plays like shit. >it's a meme game that will never come out because it doesn't exist. t. Phippsian "AIDs isn't a real disease" pozzers. The reason why people actually get butthurt about Grimoire releases is because we know there is a huge game existant due to the demos and superdemos he's released in his trolling career.
Blake Robinson
see, this is what I meant here these threads are just LE EPIC CLEVE POSTS LOL. the "dev" is an attention horde and retards think it's funny to repost ad nauseam
Samuel Adams
epik bait my man, I'm sure the game will be out tomorrow!
Jason Hernandez
> All these people sucking Cleve's cock on RPGcodex and Steam forums
And Sup Forums says that Blizzdrones and Ubidrones are the worse.
Christian Jenkins
Disgusting sape
Jacob Hernandez
>epik bait my man Literally anyone who paid the American't $15 on indiegogo has access to the first 60 hours of Grimoire.
Gabriel King
>attention horde what's that?
Mason Jones
>look to the forums that are upset about Grimwah and not enjoying the ride because the author is an icky, possibly ironic, racist >RPGWatchMeGetCucked, Neofaggotry, Goons So which one are you?
Liam Stewart
> 23 years to make a 2D dungeon crawler
Totally not a scam.
Jonathan Nelson
I won't even play it, but I'll still pirate it. Homo-sepiens pride WORLDWIDE, fuck those cromagbetas.
Zachary Morgan
> RPG codex > upset about Grimoire
Are you retarded?
Angel Butler
so where's the game then? it surely isn't going to be on Steam tomorrow, Cleve is still "doing final checks" as per his last post.
he will never release Grimoire because there is no Grimoire. get real
Brody Lewis
Now I want to believe
Nolan Torres
>Cleve shitposts about neanderthals for ages >latest scientific findings point to non-Africans all sharing some neanderthal genes BB-Bakana!
Adrian Gomez
>sad to say this but i'll pirate this one you aren't going to pirate this one because there won't be anything to pirate
this has been going on literally for decades. he sets a release date, blows past it, disappears for a while, then comes back with excuses and a new release date. wash, rinse, repeat. And nobody ever learns
Bentley Smith
Most of these cocksuckers are newfags who found out about the game recently though. No person who knows about the game's background unironically worships Cleve.
Oliver King
/meltdown/ when?
Luis Nelson
It's happening! instead of "working" on his final release, cleve begins to delete and ban in the steam discussions, so even beclevers begin to think they've been speaking to ghosts
Samuel Gomez
lmao still no uploads guess we gotta wait another ten years
Charles Wood
>the game doesn't exist
What about the super demos? They clearly show a game.
Lucas Collins
They clearly show the Wizardry 7 alpha.
Blake Barnes
yeah, that's the texture-modded Wiz7 alpha that I mentioned earlier. do you REALLY expect this dumbfuck to create and release a game on his own? come on. he's an attention-whoring meme and the retards on the steam forums just keep feeding his insanity.
Luke Lee
Ok, lets suppose he stole wiz7. It still left him with all the artwork and dungeon design. Even if he is being a cheap liar about it, which I particularly don't care, did he really made all the level design/pixel art/texts? Or that was also 've been stolen?
Ethan Ross
>"you can insult me personally as much as you want and I won't ban you" >call him a fraud >get banned wew
Evan Bailey
The designs are commissioned artworks of literally whos from Deviantart.
Brayden Butler
why would I play this over Grimrock?
Chase Howard
Does Grimrock have over 600 hours of content? Didn't think so, neanderthal.
Colton White
I will laugh so fucking hard if he somehow misses this release date too.
Juan Morales
maybe because you've already played grimrock and want to play something else? sometimes it is good to have more than one game in a genre
Zachary Rivera
Play the demo
30 minutes in and it already has more interesting and memorable encounter and level design than Grimrock 2.
Angel Allen
>cleve begins to delete and ban in the steam discussions That's just regular Cleve though.
Blake White
Because enemy encounters are actual fights instead of post-impressionist performance art?
Brody Bell
does steam even have any of the game's builds yet?
Christian Morris
>Includes tags you've filtered out:Anime wtf I hate cleve now
Hudson Russell
It's on now faggots. Get ready for the Second Coming. Nothing will ever match this master piece, it is the peak of the industry and of the artistic creation of mankind and we are all here to witness it. Only a couple of hours...
Nathan Murphy
>he actually thinks this will work Cleve knows what you're trying to do and has contingencies to counter it. You'll regret pirating this piece of software.
Oliver Gonzalez
How about buying it, pirating, and then refunding if it's shit?
Jackson Baker
Play Wizardry 7. The only difference between Wiz 7 and Grimoire is that the former actually exists.
Kayden Smith
Cleve will sue everyone who is refunding the game because consumer rights are a big no-no for anglos.
Levi Moore
I've shaved off all my hair and have covered my face in ash. I kneel by the computer all day keening over a printout of Cleve's smug fat face. I've pissed and shit myself in abject despair and am too broken to clean myself. I can't get up or move anywhere. I can't keep any food or drink down, but I don't want to be conscious, so I've been butt-chugging bottles of gas station wine.
My boyfriend left me because I broke down and told him Grimoire was more important to me than he was. It's ok though. Cleve is a real man. Cleve will love me. I don't care if he has a big neanderthal head or a weird, lumpy body. I want him inside me, pumping away, propping himself up on my face with his hand, and when he cums in me I want us both to shriek "GRIMOIRE: HERALDS OF THE WINGED EXEMPLAR" in unison.
I will conceive a child. I won't name it because Cleve will let me play what he's made after I let him inside me. I will birth the child while I play Grimoire. It will fall out of me and I won't even notice. It will die some hours later, neglected and on the floor. My party should be level 20 at this point.
So don't you ever fucking tell me I don't have a life. Don't you ever tell me I don't have dreams.
Michael Torres
10/10
Owen Parker
>attention horde >what's that?
Tumblr.
Cooper Myers
>Release Date: 1997
Is all you need to know.
Aaron Reyes
i heard rumors of him going to all the big pirates houses and throwing spears and their house
Jose Hill
>and their house You might think this is a typo but it's not. He actually threw their house. On top of them.
Jose Gray
...
Cooper Wright
>still no physical content on the steamdb page
kek, I'm actually lookin forward to the next excuse
Jaxson Ortiz
He still probably has a few femtoissues to deal with.
Julian Green
His boyfriend actually passed out. For real.
Alexander Anderson
>oops guys hit a nano-obstacle, Steam has to review it >it'll be a few more days >whoa turns out there's a ton of problems gotta fix 'em :^)
Colton Diaz
Is it out yet?
Jose Foster
It's "passed away". Passed out is when you're unconscious.
