ITT we design the worst possible game, one mechanic at a time

ITT we design the worst possible game, one mechanic at a time.

turn-based

Paid Mods.

>enemies are invincible when staggered
>you're not

Hard mode's locked behind a McDonald's toy that costs actual cash.

A black, muslim, trans, blue haired, genderfluid, otherkin is the MC

Hunger bar, moving anything faster than slow walking depletes it fast.

Entire game is a quicktime event escort quest with unskipable cutscenes and every level is dlc.

No KB+M support

It's in first person view

locked at 25 fps

anime midi ost

mobile exclusive

There's no animations available

Can only be played using a driving wheel.

no save feature

Time-exclusive content a la Hitman.

have to use the arrow keys to move

autosaves every 30 seconds

Running makes you go faster than npcs. Walking makes you go slower than them.

>stamina bar that depletes quickly
>we make the player backtrack to the same 3 areas 3 times for different magic mcguffins
>fight the same boss 3 times
>really shitty motion controls for combat
>annoying handholding companion
>can't beat final boss without the use of an item that gives you invincibility
wait that's just skyward sword

>HURRR DURRR TURN BASED IS SO DUMMBB HURR DURR ACTION OPEN WORLD RPG xD!!!!!!!!!!

Underwater.

can only be played by using your dick

Early access

Why? Leave that to Randy Pitchford.

>Developed by Hi-Rez

XBOXONEX Japanese Exclusive.

>can't beat final boss without the use of an item that gives you invincibility

Casual faggot, the final boss was great. No need for invulnerability, just use your fucking moves and stop flailing at him aimlessly.

Always online

Pay to pirate

enemy hitbox detection only works when it feels like it

loading screens are just violent seizure-inducing flashing screens

permadeath

WE WUZ on the Cover/advertisements

Turn based is boring as fuck. It's for brainlet introverts who can't handle the dynamic action

Episodic

Loot boxes

Jesus ..

Only on Android™

Volume options in 10% increments.

deletes all savegames upon exiting the program

Kill one of the developers then put him in the game as a memorial buy charge people 5 dollars for it

You have to grind for weeks to unlock one character.

vision tied to batteries that you constantly need to replace, they are finite

It's a team based game with no region lock.

Gear durability, when it breaks it's gone forever. You can't repair.

Episodic

Full game only available if you buy the collector's addition

Some enemies can only be beaten by waiting for 5 real life minutes for a weak point to appear.

you can't refute the other points.

No subtitles

You see, the point of this thread is to combine mechanics that don't go together so that the result is bad. It isn't a "list a mechanic you don't like" thread, you dingdong

No cute waifus

Actual pay to win, like the end of boss fight in Dawn of Sorrow but instead of drawing a pattern you pay $20

The matchmaking is rigged so that literally every match you enter has at least 10 Australians, no matter where you're playing from.

gay romance

Instant failure stealth mission with timer

Shakespeare book puzzles

FUUUUUCK THIIIIIIS

you have to win at least 50 arguments in the ingame chat to get an ending that isn't shit

Text Boxes pause the game
There is a 5 second timer before you can close the text boxes

>early Bloodborne loading time
>PS3 Dark Souls' swamp framerate
>hunger bar
>blood vials system for HP recover
>all NPC are voiced, in spanish only

The whole game is an escort mission.

Online Only Single Player.

Ah, the two greatest sins of game design.

Every action has a cooldown

Opening and closing animation of the text box lasts 3 full seconds and cannot be skipped.

So its, an early access Japanese exclusive X-Bone game, developed by Hi-Rez studios. First person survival, always online, where you can only walk at the slowest pace or else you'll die, controlled by arrow keys. You're always placed on a foreign team, and permadeath will start you over, but you have to grind/survive for hours to unlock the next character.

Upon losing, your webcam takes a picture of your disappointing face so the enemy team may mock it.
Upon subsequent losses, a picture of your dick is required.

Wrong quote.

Semi random level roulette.

Procedurally generated but it all looks like shit no matter what.

random combat in every area, except they messed up the RNG making you run into something every other step.
there's no patch coming either, the developers never recognized it as a bug and will never come out with a fixed version

Schrödinger's cat motif

You have to backtrack through the entire map every time you clear a level. Then, you get a quest or a mission that takes you through a level you've already played through, with respawns.

Game is in black and white

The rival character is a futa loli fox

Whenever an enemy player types "gg ez" in the chat, everything you type for the next 5 minutes is replaced by an austistic fit.

I can already think of 5 games that share a concerning amount of space on the venn diagram for this

Extremely intense Chromatic Abberation.

>but it doesn't become apparent how terrible it is until later when you notice your hunger bar is nearly empty but food doesnt seem to do ANYTHING

>implying this is bad

Multiplayer matches have an enforced win cap where you can't keep playing for a while after winning a set ammount of games.

Changing anything in options (graphics, brightness, sound) requires game restart

Ice physics on every surface

>Viking Hack & Slash
>Every time you level up you have to scream into your mic
>Sensitivity is set to very low on purpose forcing you to scream at vocal cord tearing decibels

Moe aesthetic

guns that jam

Quick time events.

If you get more than 20 kills in a match you will be permabanned for alleged cheating.

How is this bad in anyway? Volgarr 2?

the game is ten dollars cheaper, but the devs revolutionize with in game advertisements.

Overused pixel artstyle.

devs be lurkin this thread for the next big meme game
>it's story based but it gradually reveals that the story is dumb and mocks you for investing your time

Dubstep OST

Pixels stretch and rotate.

It's unpirateable.
But it has a good demo.

Yes.

every enemy is a very retarded bullet sponge