What are some of your favorite Vidya quotes?
I don't know why, but anything the Truth says always gets to me.
>Carl Johnson: Can you shoot?
>The Truth: Shoot? I'm a hippie. The only thing I've shot is acid. I heard a dude snorted it once. Thought his nose was a kangaroo and the moon was a dog! WOOH
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Good taste, OP. GTA games are very quotable in general.
>I got the Sicilians on the phone wanting peace. We all want peace. But my peace, not their fucking peace.
> It's been said that the 501st got the best of the war. We also got the worst. On Felucia, the Seps dug their metal heels into the muck of that alien hellhole and dared the Republic to come in after them. So we did, only to be met with the month after month of flesh-eating diseases, shrieking nocturnal predators, and other sights that haunt me to this day. Cut off and for all we knew abandoned by our superiors, our only hope was Aayla Secura, our Jedi commander. Without her iron will, none of us would have come out of that mess with our sanity, or our lives. When her death came, I hope it was quick. She earned that much.
> When the 501st was finally rotated out of Felucia, Aayla Secura made a point of seeing us off personally, calling us the bravest soldiers she had ever seen. It's a good thing we were wearing helmets, because none of us could bear to look her in the eye.
...
>James Pedeaston - Talk Radio: Hello, you're on the Wild Traveler.
>caller: I'm on a cliff.
>James Pedeaston - Talk Radio: How romantic!
>caller: I want to jump.
>James Pedeaston - Talk Radio: Yes, I know. Jump into the unknown. How can it be a sin if it feels so good?
>caller: Why am I here?
>James Pedeaston - Talk Radio: I dunno, why are you there? Where are you? Kenya?
>caller: No, I'm in Verdant Bluffs.
>James Pedeaston - Talk Radio: Oh, loathsome place. I'd jump if I were you.
>caller: I want to go to hell.
>James Pedeaston - Talk Radio: Me too! Buy a refrigerator magnet when you get there
HE'S SO DOWN FOR THA HOOD HE IGNORE ME???
>You killed me!
>Good.
>Do you shower in do-do?
retconned
they don't know about order 66
>Lianne, I don't know if you've ever covered a riot before, but the scene here is amaaazing!
>You broadcasters are all the same - always out on, uh, "boys' nights".
>Lazlow, do you know what "fuck me harder" means?
>the entirety of Gordon Moorehead Rides Again
How is GTA radio consistently so great?
Voiceover: Excuse me, sir, do you enjoy your job here?
Child: It's fun... We get to play with knives!
Voiceover: Heh, I see... is there a real sense of teamwork?
Children: My friend Joey sewed his hands together!
Voiceover: Wow, you're learning some real skills! How about the salary and benefits?
Children: Yesterday, I made a dollar!
Favourite GTA radio ad
Piss off, Zelda.
Honestly, the radio banter and commercials are the reason I Still play this game. While the power was out during Hurricane Irma, I whipped out the old iPad (please forgive me) and played the Mobile version just to hear the radio. Drove around Flint County laughing my dick off. San Andreas was honestly the peak for Rockstar's Satire.
All the satire is so shit tho... Ha Ha Cluckin' Bell, it sounds like Fuckin' Hell!
Man 1: It was 9 AM. The phone rang.
(sound of phone ringing)
Man 2: Commando Pest Eradication! You saw a bug on your child’s apple? Code
Red, boys! We got a live one!
Man 1: Your home, much like the rest of the world, is infested with unwanted
vermin. Commando Pest Eradication will wage war on nature, so you don’t have
to.
(sound of helicopter in background)
Man 2: Hello, mam.
Woman: Thank God you’re here! I saw a bug in the kitchen!
Man 2: You did the right thing, mam. We’ll take it from here. Everything’s
going to be okay.
(sound of gunfire)
Man 1: Commando Pest Eradication uses only the most -lethal- chemicals to rid
your home of unwanted life. Our team is composed of military-trained
professionals that know how to take care of a messy situation fast. After
successfully de-foliating Vietnam, we turned our attention to the homefront-
your homefront.
Man 3: We’ve got the situation in the kitchen contained, sir. But I found
this!
(sound of baby crying)
Man 2: Jesus! What the hell is this?
Woman: That’s my daughter!
Man 2: Looks more like VietCong to me!
(sound of gunshot)
("Johnny Comes Marching Home" plays in background)
Man 1: Commando Pest Eradication. We kill everything in sight, so you feel
safer. It’s the war on nature- and this time, we’re winnin
>Cluckin' Bell, it sounds like Fuckin' Hell!
I never realised this
They try to put their stake in everything they see. Nobody's dick's that long, not even Long Dick Johnson, and he had a fucking long dick. Thus, the name.
Man: Coming soon to the Los Santos Convention Center- it’s Mike Andrews!
Mike: Understand that it’s okay to be poor! There need to be poor people! We
rich are the yin. You are the yang! We need you!
Man: He’s changed millions of lives with his book, ‘Rags are Riches.’ Now hear
Mike Andrews live!
Man 2: Mr. Andrews? I, I’ve been having a run of bad luck, and I was wondering
if the state could help me get back on my feet.
Mike: This is the kind of negative, obsessed, and greedy talk that doesn’t help
anyone. My program will teach you a new outlook on life. Instead of
complaining about being poor, enjoy it! Watch TV! Don’t vote! Who cares?
Man 2: But I’m homeless!
Mike: You’ve got it all wrong! Society doesn’t owe you anything! The
government has better things to worry about. Like killing innocent people!
You already have everything you need, so enjoy your life!
Man: See Mike Andrews live for only two hundred dollars, payable in ten
installments! Reserve your seat today
>Social class distinctions disappear when you're naked. I can't tell whether you're rich or poor, black or white. It doesn't matter becaues everyone is naked.
>Pastor Richards -
>WHAT
He's the only "DUDE WEED LMAO" character that is actually well written
>The Truth: Hey, you want a hit on this? A little Temple Charas in a cocktail with some Nepalese munga munga.
>Carl Johnson: Put that thing out, man, I can't see.
>The Truth: Hey, mellow out, brother. It's good shit.
>Carl Johnson: Put it out, motherfucker, I'm warning you!
>The Truth: Wooah, chill the fuck out! Firstly, you are a real buzz killer, amigo. And secondly, I never made love to my mother. She wouldn't. And thirdly, we're in this together, so be cool.
The REALLY funny part about The Truth is that he knows way too much about government secrets. What was that green stuff???