How would you design L4d3's survivors, Sup Forums?

How would you design L4d3's survivors, Sup Forums?

>4 dudes
>have media complain about sexism
>release characters as dlc
>have the characters be female
>make a ton of money

a qt azn female to reel in the waifufags

White neckbeard Sup Forums poster
Instagram assposting valley girl
Middle aged used car salesmen
Fortune 500 CEO

>Autistic 22 year old weeb who specializes in melee based off of his chinese cartoons, is living the dream
>30-something conspiracy theorist /k/ommando, thinks the zeds are a product of bankers trying to reset the world and make more money
>African former merc, heavily implied to have eaten people, is mostly killing the zombies for fun
>Soccer mom who lost her kids and now views the rest of the survivors as her babies

DLC:
>Punk brother and sister duo
>Cowboy
>Literally Jesse Ventura
>Literally Burt Reynolds

>Soccer mom who lost her kids and now views the rest of the survivors as her babies

Famed kenpo fighter Garrett Jr.

AYY YO CRACKER WATCHU THINK BOUT THESE ZAMBIES?
IMMA FINNA SMOKE THESE NIGGAS
but possibly in a cute fasion

I like those.

a hot black chick
a hot asian chick
a hot white chick
and a hot latina or brown chick

...

trash

these are pretty good

>Dude Hipster
>Salaryman
>Soccer Mom
>Keith

She brown not black.

Toss in a preacher that dual wields a bible and a 1911.

Set the game in the 60's.
Game takes place across Europe.
You play as the Beetles.

>Old Mall Cop also the essential black dude
>Crooked Lawyer
>Cartel Member
>Hospital Nurse

>Valve making games
Last time they tried they were shamed.

>giving different character special perks
do you even lf4d fucker

Change the location to some slavshit and make those like that MOTHER RUSSIA BLEEDS game.
Vasiliy - a grumpy bum.
Sergei - a dirty cop.
Boris - a polititian (secretly a faggot).
Masha - a coutrygirl.
That would be pretty much like You Are Empty but acually decent game.

This is fun

>implying valve will ever make another game
That's funny, goyim. Now bend over and buy more Dota 2/CS:GO/TF2 lootboxes.

make it not L4D
there is too much zombies games since the last 10 years

>Not giving characters room to develop/specialize so that way it can still compete with the likes of Payday, Overmeme, and technically Killing Floor

Piss off everybody by making it 3 women and 1 guy and the one guy is some young dude who was in seminary school to become a priest

Hmmmm... Sweetie? :-)

>Yeah I want L4D
>But not really L4D

>I want L4D to die

sounds like haremshit, up to even having the protag not wanting to shag the girls

Yeah because a series whose last entry was in 2009 definitely isn't dead already

Probably. I'm just saying it because nobody wanted to play the girl in-game

If you want that shit, go play Payday or any of the other cheap and inferior L4D clones. L4D is perfect since it doesn't resort to that garbage.

>Waaah I don't want to have to specialize! I want blank slates I can replace with mods!

Kek
Wish Rachel was like that

>a black fireman
>a white literal trash bag bum
>a white country singer woman
>a black old-ass mailman

Replace token nigger with a bro indian

Ellis is my squarefu.

>takes place in LA
>asian trap
>black jazz musician
>female hispanic lawyer
>white police officer

4 strong, white Aryan men

The only answer is create a character with customisation in lootboxes

Personally I would prefer them all to be female. My favorite part of Left 4 Dead was Zoey's suffering. I liked watching her get choked by the smoker. I used to beat off to her pain noises, they really turned me on.

I've unironically played Left 4 Dead with 2 to 3 girls in the group. There are LOTS of grills playing Left 4 Dead, I'd say probably 10% of the playerbase for that game is female. When I'd play with my guy friends we'd always argue who got stuck with Zoey; the opposite issue happened when I played with them.

I wish Jessica was one of the survivors but that wouldn't make any sense or wouldn't happen. A cute waitress girl / biomedical engineering student who wanted to find a cure for the zombie disease. I just wish there was more content of her even if it meant her being ported into other universes. I tried to find her voice actress to see if she would make Mp3s of Jessica's voice in return for money, but they never replied to any of my emails.

>Fat fedora wearing loser who blames god for everything that is happening
>Cute Christian girl who preaches the holy bible
>40 year old conspiracy nutjob who things the zombies are aliens
>Escaped convict who is just having fun

sadly this is the most probable scenario

All the suggestions in this thread are

>edgy dude
>edgy dude
>edgy dude
>innocent girl

They're literally not

>Left For 4 Dead

3 black guys and 1 white girl is what it's going to be like

>card game counting as a game

A Japanese businesswoman
A black male otaku
A southern male lawyer
A bearded survivalist man

le4t for de4d

...

They're all buff brown lolis

If L4D3 ever comes out it will be shit like this
>Lesbian white woman
>Arab guy
>Nigger with buffed look
>White hillbilly/crackhead with sexist and racist lines that others call out all the time.

I fucking hate world as it is. But mark my words.

>African former merc
>not a Serbian merc who served in the Congo

3 negros and one white teenager female

I cringe thinking about what Sup Forums would say if the L4D2 cast came out today. They'd decry it as Jewish SJW propaganda and it'd flood the board with shitposting for a solid month

>Overweight mid-20's Tumblrina that has 'headmates' and specific pronouns depending on the map that the other survivors begrudgingly use
>Edgy Alt-right meme lord in his late teens
>Homeless guy dressed as a vicar
>7ft tall severe autist wearing childrens clothes that going only speak in imitations of whatever the other survivors say

>Jerry Seinfeld
>George Costanza
>Elaine Benes
>Cosmo Kramer
It's the only way.

Where does Left 4 Dead even take place, I know in America, but where?

>Literally I am a victim the post

Sup Forumsfags are literally just bizarro SJWs jesus christ

The game isn't even real and you're offended by it already. jesus christ

I hope it is, the autistic rage of people like you brings joy into my life

There is no other answer.

>hospital nurse
Oh yey, now I can self-insert more easily

you should stop using the Internet for a while.
Go outside and rethink your life.

3 gay trans men and one obese non-binary lesbian. It's only fair.

Like this.

I want to play your game, man

I wish it was that easy, most of the shit that's crammed into these gambling cubes are community made.
Valve only really cares about the Steam Sales now days

the only cast that would not offend Sup Forums

the K-On main cast

lol, me too
the porn parody was great at the time as well

Old Azn Lady as one of the characters.
Talks about how her children need to give her grandkids all the time and yells curse words in Japanese/Mandarin/Whatever.
Talks about how if she could basically raise 13 kids, keeping three other survivors in line is no problem.
Also probably insults the cockiest of the group with quick, concise insults to knock them down a few pegs or something
I just want a granny character of some kind, really

Sup /his/

Nick and coach should do a buddy cop movie.

>implying he's wrong
Bonus points for black chick with an afro.

This is unironically a great setup. But maybe make the crooked lawyer be conflicted with the shit he did and maybe have a vague connection to the cartel member's gang.

politics here were a half assed joke once with a big portion of sarcasm. But this brought in people who have nothing but political opinions that are mostly bizarre.
Let's see how many of them call me leftist/sjw/neogaf whatever.

I buy that.

So just Sally from IW then?

4 anime girls.
>small boobs tsundere twintails girl
>big tits genki childhood friend girl
>small loli kuudere maid girl
>big muscle tall futa girl
GOTY make it happen

Oh thank god, wew, that means greenlight on fap machine.

All straight, white males with brown hair.

The best part of the cast in both games is that they aren't outrageous. Instead all of them are relatively normal so the 3rd cast should keep that.

> quoting roasties
fucking christcucks lmao

Spanish girl
Japanese girl
Chinese girl
and uh... Jackie Chan. Fuck.

Coach and Rochelle have nothing to do with politics. Coach is likable and Ro' is essentially the bland everyman like Louis.

Nick is a dick who becomes friendly and Ellis is an endearing goof. Neither are le ebil wite man or overt strawmen.

The "romances" with the original cast are Rochelle and Francis, and Zoey and Ellis, both straight and neither BMWF.

There's nothing that people who aren't deliberately shitposting would actually complain about there.

Four gays that shriek and scream things in gaytalk whenever a special infected appears.

>disliking things means you are triggered now.

Oh neofags ... you had so much learning before posting yet you skipped the tutorial.

...

oh my god shut the fuck up already

Rochelle's afro design and personality is literally 10x better than her current one

>Ro' is essentially the bland everyman like Louis.

Rochelle is the "sassy black woman" minus the afro.

>There's nothing that people who aren't deliberately shitposting would actually complain about there.
you mean Sup Forums?

Oh fuck yes
Theyre all varying degrees of faggoy, one of them has nails andnis constantly holding a smartphone with a knob

3 girls and one trap. The trap's identity is never revealed until the last mission.