New Tomb Raider movie poster

New Tomb Raider movie poster

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Doesn't look like Laura at all.

bitch be rollin in the dirt

kek, this hurts the sides in some unique ways.

I forgot this even existed

She's Jewish right? Scandie girls are never that swarthy

where are the twins we love so much?

Who cares.

...

Better than Angelina Jolie with her nigger lips.

Apologize.

Where are the boobies?

Lara is looking rather handsome.

People actually like her now?

damn boogie really lost some weight

It's probably the lighting/dirt

What will come first a good video game movie made by Hollywood or a good anime movie made by Hollywood

0% tits

>Micheal Fassbender married this

Pettanko

Isn't nu-Lara supposed to be partly Asian?

>let's cast for a character with one defining and persistent physical feature from the very beginning
>actress does not possess that physical feature? Perfect

>tits so small theres no cleavage
>that fivehead

Why should I watch this when I could watch some other movie with actual attractive girls? Especially since 95% of all video game movies automatically suck?

Interesting to see men have been tricked into being uncomfortable with women with curvy bodies and tits.

This is nuLara we're talking about
The girl designed after the Hunger Games protagonist

Men are not responsible for this. Women are.

>20 replies in
>the picture still hasn't been posted

Fridge?

She's so fucking ugly. Why would you not just cast Camilla?

Linebacker

Hollywood cock suckery. They'll hire someone because they're married to someone famous.

Even NuLara has a pretty decent rack compared to this

For what? The first Tomb Raider movie was decent action flick and Angelina looked the part.

She was hot in Man from UNCLE

Hollywood spends however many tens of millions on marketing and their posters somehow look like knock off Chinese DVD covers
Which is probably their main audience now

NuLara is a revolting piece of shit that needs to be abused maliciously. She's a knuckle-dragging barrel of horse spunk that exists to be degraded and humiliated.

I won't, Jolie becoming an action star was the beginning of the late 90s blockbuster demise that in the end ushered capeshit that strangles the medium to this day.

At least they got her neck right in this one

where are the titties

Just think of this movie as one of last spurts of Weinstein cum to stain the (((silver))) screen.

Lara already had large lips.

The devs do realize that most people like classic Lara. They are going for a whole origin thing. "nu-Lara"will get traumatized on an adventure and switch to "classic Lara" as a defense. They are going for a multiple personality thing. Classic Lara is an insane heroic alter ego of modern Lara.

>video game movie
>nuLara
is there any reason at all anyone should care for this

>Has neither an ass nor tits
Why even see this film?

Yes, she is.

She isn't cute at all either. What is going on?

They are completely different characters. How can anybody still believe in prequel meme?

Someone probably weinstein'd her and she sucked that dick like a champ homey.

Casting a Lara that doesn't look like a Lara is going to be the least of this films problems.

Also the only reason the original movies even partially worked was because they were tongue in cheek. Millennials don't know how to have fun, and a serious/realistic Tomb Raider is going to be fucking awful.

I ain't saying shit, but in the next few years, watch nu-Lara start to resemble the old Lara more and more.

>laura

because she has an oscar, she is a good actress

Yes, I'm sure everybody is going to check it out because of her acting.

Dude, theres next to no jews in Scandinavia, wwII happened, most fled to America.

Also, cannot find anything to suggest she's jewish on a quick google, except the fact that she doesn't have blue eyes. Her skins white as fuck normally tho', probably just tan.

>This is your new Lara Croft (male)

T-thanks, Hollywood.

That's not what will happen. They'll just do another reboot.

They had an opportunity already to make nu-Lara more like old Lara and even teased it a bit in 2013 but chose not to.

Mate, why should I just take your word for it?

Well, they're not going to check it out for her rockin' body, that's for damn sure

Believe what you wanna believe m8. Nu-Lara will be more like Old-Lara as time goes on though. They ain't just making this shit up as they go along.

They're still going with that shark week color scheme? The logo is so hard to read it seems like they're ashamed to have their movie be called Tomb Raider. Doesn't stand out at all on the poster.

nuLara is hotter than old Lara, and still has big ass tiddies.

This girl is both ugly and has no tits whatsoever. The concept of the series doesn't make for a fantastic movie, it's going to be a shitty blockbuster. The only way it'll remotely not utterly fail is if people push a feminist agenda with it to try to sell to women and cuckolds

>forcing stupid identity politics into starwars
>now a croft with no tits
its over, they want to subvert everything men like

They should probably say somewhere this is based off the new games so beople don't get confused over her lack of booobs.

3D is disgusting, just a reminder this woman has literal SHIT inside her body right now. Fucking nasty

Nu Lara is a solid D cup with a great set of DSLs though so it's not based on that at all. This is a flat chested insult.

Old Lara was D cup.

>looks like a boy
>no tits whatsoever

Why is she so flat?

Tits Raider

That's a whole lot of forehead, me familia.

She takes the BBC during the film, right?

> not directed by Uwe Boll

gal gadot and now this, why don't women have tits in flicks anymore?

>all that fucking photoshoping

why?

Come on, dude. Everyone knows that small-titted girls give their anus way more easily than huge boobers. It's a psychological thing: a girl with big tits knows they're enough for you, but the one with small tits is quite aware she has small tits and wants to oblige your johnson in any way possible.

And some people, like yours truly, enjoy the eternal stinker more than anything else.

She's beautiful okay?

Really? This was the best they could find for Lara?

Is it really better of it's just a psychological thing?

Old Lara was a G cup are you some kind of amateur?

Yeah but fat chicks with huge tits are even more likely to give up their stinkers so that's always been my primary target,

...

It's mostly a psychological thing to be honest. My wife actually has a tighter cunt than asshole but I still prefer to fuck her butt because there's something about it that just tickles my fancy and always makes me blow huge loads up her dumper.

...

I'm gonna hurl
Nu Lara deserves better.

Can anyone point out the difference to me?

>Rebooting a video game movie
For what purpose

reminds me a bit of Alizee ... just without tits and ass

youtube.com/watch?v=Q6omsDyFNlk

No polka dots.
t. Internet Super Sleuth

Wow, i like all sorts of women, but this one doesn't even look like one.

Depends. It has a psychological side to it, of course, being the "taboo" place to put it in, being hella intimate and forbidden, if you like.

It does, however, have a literal physical pros. The anus is not made for fucking, so it is tighter, more course in texture and not as well lubricated, and you can feel all of that. Contrary to popular opinion, the rectum does have a lubrication mechanism of its own, just not as effective as the one found in the vag. Rectal lubrication is what facilitates big dumps coming out of your ass, really.

Long story short, if you never tried anal before, you most definitely need to try it out. It is sublime, especially when the girl is into it as well - that's when anal really shines and works miracles.

Tits or Ass?

>brown eyes
0/10 wouldn't fuck with someone else's dick

damn. can i try it on your ass?

what could have been

not all women have titties. dont be a misogynist pig

Get ready for another Mary Sue

Calling it here

I never tried anything, but thanks.

Why are real women so disgusting?

this is your male(female) for today

you have to fuck it

Unlike the vagina, the anus was not evolved to take penises into it. This means it does not repair itself as efficiently. Gay bottoms and anal whores end up with a rather bad problem: they become incontinent because their ass has been damaged too much to fully repair.

Anal also increases your odds of getting diseases such as HIV by huge margins, which is why HIV/AIDS was thought to be a "gay only" disease for so long.