Autistic things you have done IRL

Autistic things you have done IRL
>go on a walk
>think "I'm bored, I'll just fast travel back ho-"
>realize how dumb I am

US GAMERS RITE?!

>play a bunch of Fire Emblem
>think of people as "units" and not "people"
Guys, am I becoming a sociopath?

I don't sleep anymore
I wait 7-8 hours a day

>want to sleep
>can't sleep monsters nearby
haha like in skyrim

did the same thing and also thought "d I have enough movement to go shopping" before realizing I'm a retard.

>Autistic skyrim players actually think this

>have to fix something on my roof
>forgot my ladder
>think "I'll just use Revali's Gale to-"
>realise how dumb I am

Same here but the monster is my dad so I never sleep anymore :(

>Just going to drown myself so I can rez at the graveyard instead of walking
Get it? Like in WoW

I played TF2 for like 7 hours straight one night and when I was walking home the next day the thought occured to me for a moment that I could use the fences as corners to rocket jump from to get there quicker.

>whistle for my horse
>you can’t summon horses by whistle
>I don’t have a horse
Get it? Like in Zelda?

>he doesn't know about fast travel

This cake is GREAT
It's so DELICIOUS AND MOIST

The CAKE is a LIE lololololol XD
Get it?

suck your dad's dick

It's weird because I've never played Skyrim or any open world game at all. I mean, I played BotW and some AC games but thatwas a long time ago.

>jump off bridge
>no glider in real life
>realize how dead I am

this is the worst part of the day to come at Sup Forums

Just do a ground pound before you hit the floor, dumbass.

If only all of the BoTWfags would do this..

Ain’t that fast.

Thats a portal reference lol.
another great day on v

BBBRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

faster than walking

So it's more like getting a mount

After playing too much tf2 I once walked up to a wall irl and wondered where the fuck the spray key was.

I'm your prom date you ugly sack of shit!

*BRAPFFTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAP* *BRAAAAAAPP*
ughhhhhh... My stomach is roaring hurting!
*BRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP*
ughhhhhhhhh... That's much better... My stomach better... Here comes another!
*BFFFFFFTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAP*ther!
*BFFFFFFFFTTTPPFFT* *BRAP BRAP BRAPPPFFT* *BRAPFFT* *BRAPPPPP*
ughhhhhhhhh! Stinky! My belly-welly-welly is another!
*BRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPFFTTTRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAPPPPPP*
ughhhhh... That's much better....
Oh wait.... My belly-welly..... Here comes another!
*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPAAAAAAAAP*nky! My belly...... My belly-welly.....
Oh wait.... My stomach is a mess!
*BFFFFFFFTTTPPFFTTTPPFFTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP*
ughhhh.... My belly-welly is a mess!
*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPFFT* *BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPP*
ughhhh! Sting!
*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP*
Ahhhh! Sting!
*BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP*FT* *BRAPPPFFT* *BRAPFFT* *BRAAAAAAAAAP*ter... Here comes another!
*BFFFFFFFFFFFTTTPPFFT* *BRAPPPFFT* *BRAAAAAAAAAAPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP* *BRAP BRAP BRAP* *BRAP BRAPPPPPPPPPPPP*
ughhhhh... It's much better...... Here comes another!
*BRAPPPFFT* *BRAP* *BRAP BRAP BRAP* *BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP*FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFTTTPPFFTTTRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPFFT* *BRAP BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPP*
Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! Stinky! stomach better... It's much better.... That's much belly is roaring....
Oh wait.....
Ugh... That's fucking hurting!
*BRAP BRAPPPAAA

>Play R6Siege
>Go into town
>Keep having split second moments of trying to avoid/remember camera placements
Give Dokk gf

EGGS MY DEAR?

Snifffffffff..... Mmmmmmmm yes my dear

YES VERY MUCH SO

no getting a mount would be getting a car/bicycle

NUUUUUOOOOOOOORRRRRRRT

You're posting on Sup Forums: the worst board on Sup Forums

pretty sure Sup Forums takes that

THE NUGGETS ARE COMING!

SHPLISH PREPHB FLASHHHH SHLIM DUNKSH SPLADOOSH! FLOOB DING NOB BUSH SHPLING NOB BUSH PREPHB FLOOB

DING GANK THUNKSH SHPLING SHLOOP SHLOP SHLIM DUNK PLUNK BLANK

SHPLOOSH SHPLADOOSH SPLASHHHHhhhsshhhfblsmv

SUPAH SMELLAY POOOPAY FART FARRTTTAY STINKAY NASTY NASTY NASTAYYY

THUD! BRAAP NUGGETS GLINK SHPLISH DUNgk FARRRRRRrrphhhfblsmv

SUPAAAYY YUMAY HAHAHAAAPPPPFFFHHHHHhhhsshhhsshhhllfgzj

SMELLAY POOPOOOOPPOOOOOPAY SMELLAY SMELLAY POOPAY FARTAYY POOOOOOOOPPOOOOOOPPAAAAPAPAPAPAPAPAPPPPPPRRRRrrphhhfblsmv

SUPAAAYYYYNG GANK THUNK BRAAAP NUGGETS I SHPLING PPUUUUPAAAAABRAAPAPPPRRRRPPPHHTTTAY
SMELLAY STINKAY FARRRRrrphhhfblsmv SUPAAAYYYY PARTAAAYY YUMAY HAHAHAHAHAHA

OH NO MORE BRAAAP NUGGETS I SHPLAF FLASH!HHhhhsshhhllfgzj SMEHLAY STINKAY HAHAHA OH NO MORE BRAAAAPAPAPPAPAPAPPPPPPPAAAABRAAAAPPAPAPAPAPPAPAPAPPPAY

STINKAY NASTY NASTY NASTY NASTY NASTAYYY THUNK PLUNKSH SHPLING NOB BUSH PREPHB FLOOB BUSH PREPHB FLOOB DING GANK SHLOOD ON THEM

BRAAP NUGGETS ARE COMING! GLUNK SHPLOOP SHLOOP SHLOOPAY BRAAP

NUGGETS ARE GREEN THE BRAAAYY POOPPOOOOOOOOPPOOOOOOOPPOOOOOOOOOPPOOOOOPPOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP

SHOULDNTA HAD DEM BRAAABRAAABRAAAAAP NUGGETS

GLUNK GIDUNgk FART FAR FART FART FARRRRPPPHHTTTT... hngh... hngh... hngh...
PLOP! SHPLISH DUNgk FAR FARRTTT... PLOP! SPLASHHH

SHOULDNTA HAD DEM BRAAP NUGGETS ARE GREEN SOME BLOOD ON THE BRAAPAPAPAPABRAAAABRAAAAPAPAPAPPPAAAYYY

THE POOOOOOPPOOOOOOPOOPYPOOPY IS GLING SHLOOP SHLIM DUNK PLUNK BRAAAAAPAPAPAPAPAPPPAAAAAYY

POOOPAY BRAAP NUGGETS SMELLAY NASTAYYY YUMAY STINKAY NASTY NASTY NASTAYY POOOOPOOPPOOOOOOOOOPAY FART FAR FARTAAAYY YUMAY HAD DEM

BRAAHAHAAAPPPPFFFHHHHhhhfblsmv SUPAH SMELLAY POOPAY BRAAAABRAAHAHAHAHAAAAAPAPALALAPAPAPAPAPAPAPACHINO

NGGUUUHH!! FRRFRRRRPPPHHTTTTTTT... PLOP! THUD! BRAAAAAAPPPPPFFFHHHHhhhsshhhllfgzj SMEHLAY STINK GLUNK BRAAPACHIN

>play game with spooky enemy in it
>prepare for sleep
>think 'wouldn't it be fucked up if that freaky thing was in this house'
>get anxious
that's pretty much it

...

>have to go somewhere
>think "I'll be much faster if I enter morph ball to-"
>realise how dumb i am

PRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

>Spend the day procrastinating
>I can just load a save
I really hate myself for ever having these thoughts

Post it

Um..Well done, user

>think i can type kill in console to return to a place without effort

The only thing I've ever done even close to as bad as the other stuff in this thread is after playing a lot of Spy in TF2, I became hyper-aware of people's backs. I was constantly aware of what direction people were facing. It scared me a little because I wasn't even doing it intentionally, it was just automatic.

this is a b8 thread

>mfw some times I find myself thinking back on the mistakes I've made or how I've lived my life until now and think "In my next playthrough, I'm going to do something else" or something along those lines
>realize there is no next playthrough

As a kid I would use a controller while watching cartoons and pretend I'm playing them

Oooh God, oooh no...
AAAH AH AAAAAAAH
>BRAAAAAAAAAAAAP
PLEAAASEE NOOOOOO
>BRRRRRTTTTTTTT
>PPPPPRPRRRRRFFFFFFF BRRAPAPAAA
*gasps for air*
>BRRRRRAAAAPPPFFFFF BRRRRAAAAAPPPP BRRRRR BBRRR BBBBBBRRRR
>BRRRAAAAAPPPPP
>BRRRAAP BRAAAP BRRAAP BRRRRAAAAPPPPPP

PPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRBBBBBBBBBBBBBB

I wrestle with my gf and make smash bros noises

>marathon GTA IV
>walk like Nico Bellic for the rest of my life

you play any game long and obsessively enough ad you might catch yourself thinking game-wise.

Portal's really good at training you to actively look for flat white surfaces so whenever I saw an open space on my walls or ceiling part of my brain'd be all "PORTAL" for a little while after playing those games

i climbed stairways like him for quite some time

>play Sims 3 for like 18 hours straight
>time to take out trash
>attempt to x3 time to get it done faster

>Play Left4Dead for the weekend
>Go out on a monday and walk around the city
>Hear a cough from somewhere
>Immediately check the rooftop for Smokers
>Realize I'm an idiot

Sorry, don't see that on the Horizon. :^)

>Go out for a late night walk
>Wonder where the light meter is

>Contemplating doing something ballzy or foolhardy or risky
>Instinctively feel the fingers on my left hand mimic the motion of hitting F5.

And something an IRL friend had happen:
>Spend a weekend playing GTA IV
>Leave the house to get groceries
>"It's alright, I can just steal that car to get to the shops. Wait..."

>Play AC 1
>Start moving through city crowds IRL like Altair, gently pushing people out of my way.

It actually works.

>Wake up super late
>Whatever I'll just reload my save
>Sleeps even more
>It's now evening
>Shit
I fucking hate living

>die
>Forget you can't respawn

Were there any smokers up there?

no, you are becoming a proper general.

i have >1000 hours in payday 2, i always count cameras after entering a bank now. security guard gave me a weird look after i eyeballed the hall ceiling once, it's something of a habit now. us gamerz amirite eks dee

fucked your mother

>shoot up a school
>realize there isn’t a reset button

>Fail college
>Twice
>Realise I can't load previous saves

>town idiot shot dead after flying into spastic fit, attempted to take hostages with "repetitive, vulgar gestures"
>according to the security guard responsible for firing the fatal shot killing the as-of-yet unidentified young man, his last words before confronting security were "DON'AKDUMB"

>Pass college
>Still no job
>Tons of student debt
>Can't quick load because autosave

that's some arrow to the knee shit man

i know

Just turn off your sentience until you reach your destination.
Humans can do that by default right?

>use cheat codes irl
>lower other player defenses and own entire countries with my pitiful armory
>kill 6 trillion people with speed hacks (impossible otherwise)
>finally get bored, cornered in my own base
>accidentally overwrite my save file

>that kid who noclip through the hallway

>think of doing something dangerous
>know there's a good chance I'll die
>oh I'll just quicksave before
>shit

Fucking Abe's Exoddus did this to me

Large ceiling vents startled me a couple of times IRL

>achieve something good in a videogame
>stand up
>go look out the window for a while or walk to the kitchen as an act of satisfaction

I still can't explain it

I kind of do the same thing. Whenever I have a great round, I can't play another; I'll have to quit and get up and walk around a bit or play another game. I guess I just feel like I can't top that at the moment so I don't try.

>addicted to Driver 2
>go buy something on my bike
>run trough a dangerous intersection without braking and think "If I die I'll just restart"
>5 seconds later stop my bike and realized how stupidly dangerous that was

Yes, actually.

Just not on purpose.

a guy i know once called me a little bitch for doing this and i'm like

we're not playing competitively so why should i torment myself playing until i'm miserable, you're miserable, and we all quit out of frustration when we just had a really good round lol

>le walking down the street and see a fat cop eating a donut
>bright idea comes up
>le niko belic face
>run up to him and punch him in the face
>get shot
>no le restarts in real le life

I took great joy in writing this and had to break in between sentences to giggle to myself

I was hanging out with friends and one of them said "I wish I could do that in normal mode I mean real life"

>Passenger in car
>Think about how the passing buildings could be made in Minecraft

That's about it, but that may be autistic enough.

>play game with a powerful, muscular protag
>become pumped, want to go to gym again, do pullups at loading screens, start sitting straight
>forget about it minutes later

...

A lot of the places I frequent use the same black dome style cameras I get spooked a lot seeing them.

I cried a lot and still am easily in tears.

I think OP actually found a way to unlock fast traveling irl and just needed to vent after not having it for so long

meanwhile that kid that wavedashed to school still never taught me

you're on your way to become a top level British military general

Sometimes i do motion with my arms like i was holding a rifle for no reason, oh and also hurt my back once for trying to run downstairs like i was a carnotaurus from Primal carnage.

The only thing I was close to this levels of autism was when I did alot of drawing stuff on pc, then had to do one thing on paper and when I made a mistake, for an half a second I tried ctrl+z the mistake I made. Because I just spent hours doing similiar stuff on pc.

>some years ago
>out on an errand
>getting late, can't be assed to walk back home
>been playing lots of Pokemon Platinum
>think "I'll use Fly to go back ho-"
>fuck

>power is out
>looks like I'll have to get some yellow gloves and fix it myself

...

aww yeah the hotdog egg combo

She'd break her thumb/wrist with a fist like that.

...

every person irl is just an npc to me and i skip every conversation