What Happens?

ITT Sup Forums walks into an Apple store. what happens next?

>hi, I need to talk to a Genius. I have an appoint for 3pm.

>a bunch of guys come and butthole was never the same

Leave the Apple store.

...

Shoot the place up using the gun and bullets I printed with my 3D printer running libre firmware.

Install Gentoo

>Hi, I did [stupid thing with iPhone], pls gibi free phone
No other reason to go to the Apple Store.

What if you want to hit on gayboys? It's a fact that iPhone has the highest percentage of homosexual users.

it's actually not the Apple Store anymore, it's just called apple

>hi i have a relatively minor issue with a phone I purchased 11 months ago
>you'd like to replace it with a brand new phone right here on the spot? Sure that would be awesome

I tried to jailbreak my phone yesterday and this happened. whatdo?

>wait a second... is this a slight bent in the housing? Sorry, we do not service those for free.
>but... but... BENDGATE!!
>that'll be $299, sir
>*cries autistically*

>I would like to purchase a computer running BSD/Macintosh

360°

I lose my sight because of all the poorly designed, bright, eye-raping UI

gr8 b8 m8 that's clearly a hardware problem

>what happens next?
The anti-Apple conditioning kicks in; same as happened in this thread.

>gr8 b8 m8 that's clearly a user problem
Fixed.

Remark on the employee:customer ratio.

>what happens next?
Sup Forums gets embarrassed when he realises it's not a Microsoft Store despite being deserted.

I buy a new macbook and expense it to my employer so i can continue doing my job

How much do you charge for sucky sucky?

360 walk away.
Do you even Sup Forums?!? xD

i went into on once and i don't know what was more eerie, the orwellian-ish style of the store, or just how perfectly everyone in there fit the stereotype Sup Forums had me believing

chinese tourists in hi-tops and hoodies and fags/faguettes with ear spacers fawning over overpriced shit, while employees with bigger ear spacers hovered around their shoulders