Hey user, welcome to the interview.
We do interviews a little different in this company. Here's a Surface Pro 3 running Windows 10 with Ubuntu on Windows with full BASH support and Visual Studio. Code something from scratch in 3 hours, then explain your design and solution to me and the team in front of the white board.
What do you do?
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Ok what kind of thing you want me to program fron scratch?
Get distracted because I have massive curry fever, then panic for the next three hours because I'm not sure what I was supposed to be doing.
>tfw no poo in loo female boss to dominate me and make me lick her heels.
Why do I always hear about these assholish kinds of interviews when it comes to software development?
Is plagiarism and lying that rampant in your goddamn field that portfolios simply won't suffice, and instead a pop quiz is really necessary?
shout POO IN THE LOO and run out
Wonder how the fuck an electrical engineer landed a coding interview, and contemplate whether or not the overpowering stench of perfume barely hiding the faint smell of urine was coming from the indian bitch or the building generally.
she can poo in my loo
git clone github.com
heh, nothing personell
>this here is a program that adds two whole numbers. No decimals pls
Start coding a doom clone.
Explain why interfaces and Abstraktion is important.
Try to make an understandable diagram and explain every class' relation to each other as I change method implementations on the fly.
If those with no experience about it ask me about things they don't understand, my work experience as a bartender will aid me to present complexity with clarity.
I also offer them to type it themselves.
Afterwards I go home to my black wife to ravage and caress her booty as she locks her legs and whispers to my ear to paint her white inside.
It ends with kissing, licking and suckling each other as we drift into sleep.
They are being thorough. This is what a real life work situation might entail. Whiteboards are for designing, not coding.
Your team might spend 2 hours critiquing your solution, discussing how to make it better, and fit further requirements. The 6th hour is spent on open ended questioning by your future team.
The interviewers uncover A LOT about the candidate this way. A bonus benefit for the interviewers is that more than half of the candidates don't complete in time or just give up. The interview team wastes ZERO time on the rejects. This enables the hiring team to vastly increase the top of the candidate funnel.
...
In other words, yes there are a bunch of lying pajeets who can't into basic concepts.
>6 hour interview
Pajeets are statistically by far least likely to lie because they can't get into the country without having proper qualifications to begin with. It's all the Sup Forums tier chancers you have to weed out.
>they can't get into the country without having proper qualifications to begin with
lol
I would get an instant boner if faced with that woman in real life and drop all my spaghetti on the floor
...
#include
int main() {
printf("build wall\n");
return 0;
}
...
...
Don't code any thing since I wasn't given a problem to solve.
this
In that case this interview is over. Thank you for wasting my time you cunt.
>apply to programming job
>not know any programming
>get asked to write a program
>LMAO NO U CUNT
poo
depends on the country but immigration is more difficult than most folks realize.
if you're not a refugee or able to border hop then it's very difficult to get a visa, let alone stick around.
you have to be well-adjusted, not a criminal, and financially stable, and even then most of your degrees / certifications you earned back at home won't count and you'll have to earn them again, or at least take some proficiency exam like the USMLE to be licensed for work in the US.
Programming is the only job where they call you a fucking liar and ask you to prove it, despite certifications, recommendations, and portfolios.
open vim and code some algorithm with go. Try to remove Windows 10 and install linux.
Most Bro-grammers got their jobs by lying on their cv and learning on the job.
Yes.
whip out my cock and start beating it. Finish by cumming on her desk then pissing on her chair
I'm sure you're an ISO 9000 and Microsoft Associate certified expert getting asked to write FizzBuzz every day.
That's why every job requires experience.
Everyone assumes you're a lying piece of shit, so the only way to be sure you know how to do that job is by having already done it before.
I teach her the concept of a toilet.
She doesn't understand it and I don't get hired.
:(
#include
void main()
{
printf("Hello World!");
getch();
}
Did I get the job?
World shouldn't be capitalised. You passed the programming test but failed the literacy test. Sorry.
Why do indians all look like fucking rats with fucked up eyes? The color of their hair and eyes remind me of those of a fucking rat. I don't know how to put it into words, but that ill black color fucks my shit up when I look at them. It physically irks me.
Give it my best shot. Probably wouldn't do very good, though, since that would be my first technical interview.
3 Hours?
Could probably make a simple WebGL game in that time - shitty platformed with procedural generated shit levels.
Or if they want something more enterprise, make a timekeeping application in java.
But Ms. Poo in Loo, I have a vagina.
>Well, in that case, welcome aboard!
Cake
What the fuck do you mean, "Code something"? Programing is a way to solve problems; would you tell a mathematician to "Math something for three hours"?
Stupid cunt.
Create you own problem to solve, demonstrating that you understand the kind of problems that a business would need to solve. Then solve it.
Alright, then let me work here for two weeks first so that I could actually know what kind of problems this place would have.
>Math something for three hours
Yes?
Pick a theorem that you love and present it on a whiteboard.
Sounds perfectly reasonable to be honest.
> not doing prior research on the companies you're applying to
NEET alert
Except that proves nothing besides your ability to memorize shit
It's like grade school kids being taught formulas to calculate areas of geometric shapes
Give them a problem to solve and they're lost, but they can recite the formulas in their sleep
>Surface Pro 3 running Windows 10 with Ubuntu on Windows with full BASH support and Visual Studio.
literal cancer. burn the whole place
Problem is you need a job.
Solution is to do what the interviewer requires or no job.
Make a hello world program because you didn't specify what had to be programmed.
I wouldn't pull out of that OP chick. I want all my cum to line the inside of her womb
It's a title. There, I've now passed the literacy test.