Ask a Microsoft employee anything

Alright you de/g/enerates, I'm bored, so I'll answer questions for the next hour or two.

>inb4 paid shill
No, no I'm not. In fact, I'd prefer it if most of Sup Forums avoided Microsoft. It'd make my life just that much easier.

Other urls found in this thread:

thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/01/11/microsoft-anti-porn-workers-sue-over-ptsd.html
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

Why don't you find a better job?

Why is Apple so much better?

What department?
You could be a goddamn sales monkey and your answers wouldn't matter.

>Why don't you find a better job?
Eh, apathy I suppose. They pay well.

>Why is Apple so much better?
Better? Not any more. Much of the "Apple advantage" died with Jobs.

Currently in OSG as a Service Ops 2.
Really liked working in MTE core. Lots of fun flying out to various fabs and fixing shit.

How true is this part of this article:
thedailybeast.com/articles/2017/01/11/microsoft-anti-porn-workers-sue-over-ptsd.html
>They “could literally view any customer’s communications at any time.” Specifically, they were asked to screen Microsoft users’ communications for child pornography and evidence of other crimes.
And what does that actually imply? Can microsoft remote into anyone's computer? Or is this just stuff that's on microsoft servers like Onedrive shit.

Micro***t is a known botnet company

>Not any more
lel

shill confirmed

Abandon thread

How did you get your job?
Do you have a degree, or was it a nepotism gig?
How rigorous was your interview process?

Do I have any chance at a microsoft job as a self taught with only a portfolio?

of course, but it would be interesting to know the architecture of their botnet, and how pervasive it is.

He's right though.

Can you leak build 5007 for us?

This.

Are you a Pajeet? If not then how do you still work at MS?
Also post your internal mail adress and tell us if you're still using razzle.cmd

:^)

Might be rajesh this time, sir

Longhorn 5007? Why?

can I have the latest source for ntoskrnl.exe and win32k.sys?

Because it's unleaked (as are pretty much all of the others in the 5002-5047 range).

>How true is this part of this article:
I don't know, I'm not in that group. But I think they're part of PSS support, and that was Kevin Turner's group at that time, so I could see it being very true (ie the employee getting shit on).

As for content screening, still no idea. The technology is there to do it, but the group I'm is forbidden from elevating to customer data, so I can't really answer that.

How do I know you're not an Apple shill? I mean, this is exactly the kind of behavior I would expect from one. Can you offer us proof you're not?

>architecture of their botnet, and how pervasive it is.
Azure. Though the "botnet" is mostly Bing, and that's seeded from Canyon Park.

No. I don't have source depot access, and wouldn't distribute anything, no matter old, even if I did.

LCA scares me...

No, white, mid 30's male.

>If not then how do you still work at MS?
Because my bosses like me. They tried out sourcing one of my products when I was moved to O365D IRT, and it... failed. India fucked it up so bad that the ship date for the Xbox One almost slipped.

>Also post your internal mail adress
[email protected]

How do you spend most of your time at work?

So what? Are you a betaarchive autist? Theres more interesting shit than non-working Vista beta versions

>LCA scares me...
What is that even (and what does it stand for)? Is it one of those things Sinofsky put in because he didn't want anyone to know what a disaster 8 was going to be?

What is Microsoft most afraid of, internally speaking.

>How do you spend most of your time at work?
Trying to automate the pajeets out of a job.

Well, that's not entirely true. I waste a lot of time in planning meetings these days as well.

>LCA
Legal and Corporate Affairs.

Given what I've seen over the last decade, change. Largely the loss of ~40% margins.

How much shit is constantly breaking?
Is it true that Microsofts entire infastructure is outdated and vulnerable to hacking?

...

What is the layout of your workplace like? Do you have your own office or a cubical?

What is the approximate ratio of redpilled coworkers to bluepilled coworkers?

How successful was the Surface meme?
Is Microsoft worried about any of the legal trouble of force upgrading everybody to Win10?
What is the next step for the botnet, are they heading towards a real life ID system?

>How much shit is constantly breaking?
Actually very little of the "corporate infrastructure" or offered services suffers a complete outage. Servers fail, sure. It happens. But 5 9's is still a thing. Usually, when Outlook.com or Office365 break, it's because idiot cut a fiber bundle.

Though there was this one time when a power tech went to do a PMM test in a data center (480v 3 phase @ 300A/phase I think) and dropped a set of dykes across two of the phases. Knocked the entire data center off-line by triggering an EPO. Also released the Halon. That shit is poison...

> infastructure is outdated and vulnerable to hacking
Outdated? No. Vulnerable? Not really. The security teams do a decent enough job. But like anywhere the weak spot is the people.

>redpill / bluebill
Question discarded.

Successful enough. The only real issue I had with my SP3 was backlight bleed.

>legal trouble of force upgrading everybody to Win10
There's some stuff ongoing, sure. I think I saw something on Slashdot about it a few months ago. They say it was a "miss-step". I say it was pure and absolute bullshit.

I had words with people over this, but I'm not a decision maker.

How much are Macs used around Microsoft's actual HQ?

>How much are Macs used around Microsoft's actual HQ?
The Office group uses them. I'm sure there are others, but I don't really interact with the other teams a whole lot.

Actually, I take that back. SQL Qualification Labs has 80 or so trash cans in one of their labs.

>Knocked the entire data center off-line by triggering an EPO. Also released the Halon. That shit is poison...
Holy shit I didn't know datacenters could be so dangerous. It makes sense, just never thought about it before though.

>Holy shit I didn't know datacenters could be so dangerous
If you're doing power maintenance on a live Power Management Module, yeah. But that's a really stupid thing to do...

The short triggered the EPO, and the smoke triggered the Halon system.

Most of our data centers are water now, because we can loose one or two and not have service issues.

>Most of our data centers are water now
>not using mineral oil
how else are you going to cook tendies

>how else are you going to cook tendies
There's a kitchenette on every floor in every office building.

Some of them even have popcorn makers.

But The Commons also has really good food, as does the 121 cafeteria.

Oh hey Redmond Bro.
You must be around Studio H and the commons.
Don't say too much now. :)

How much poo is there in the hallways?

Sup bro?

You miss-spelled curry...

>I'd prefer it if most of Sup Forums avoided Microsoft.
tell that to the Sup Forumsermin that frequent this board asking pc mustard rice questions about their vidyagaems
windows 10 is for normalfags, no sane Sup Forumsoy uses 10

Neat thread. Believable answers.

Does Microsoft purposely go overboard on certain release features (like UAC and Win10 automatic reboots) so the later shift to a more reasonable (but still restrictive) setting is seen as a welcome improvement, instead of something to complain about?

The difference between Sup Forums and Sup Forums is that Microsoft actually makes money on Sup Forums (Xbox Live).

Sup Forums is just a whole new level of autism.

I don't think so, no. It seems to be more of a "People don't update, and get virus's because of it, so lets force the update because safety" type thing.

Think of it as a miss-guided attempt to protect "you" from "yourself".

For what should be obvious reasons automatic is disabled by GPO.

People don't update because people have gotten the (correct) impression that every update slows your computer down more and more.

I can run a linux install for years and it will be as fast as the day i installed it no matter how many packages I install.

Meanwhile on windows, the windows rot is real, no matter how much I try to avoid installing needless shit.

By money on Sup Forums you mean Sup Forums, right? I'm confused.

show badge
also, r u imported poo?

Correct. I meant Sup Forums. Getting tired, sorry.

Dism.exe /online /Cleanup-Image /StartComponentCleanup /ResetBase

rd 'c:\windows\software distribution\download'

powercfg -h off

There, that'll take care of "muh disk space" problems.

I still have a Windows XP64 install that's as quick as the day I deployed it (2007. Fucking wow.)

Though, to be fair, it's on a 120GB SSD.

>show badge
Not happening.

>also, r u imported poo?
See

Yes, but Microsoft often backpedals on the extent. Win10 updates now notify you before a scheduled reboot and allow you to put it off for a week. This is a rather nice improvement over walking away from your computer with a 5 day encode running and coming back to it restarting. But if it had been released this way it would have been only seen as being a major restriction over 7 instead of a nice improvement over the ultra shitty release version.

Ah, yes, because you doing nothing but surfing Sup Forums on your $80 Thinkpad makes you Sup Forums.

>Windows XP64 install
>120GB SSD
TRIM enabled or what?

I actually didn't notice any speed improvements in OS responsiveness going to a SSD in XP. Loading GIMP and Photoshop, yes, but XP itself was always lightning fast.

This was an X2 5200+ booting XP off an 80GB hard drive.

>TRIM enabled or what?
XP64 didn't support native TRIM. I think I'm using a 3rd party tool, but I can't recall at the moment, and the machine is at work.

>Win10 updates now notify you before a scheduled reboot and allow you to put it off for a week
Sure, but it should simply be "install X patches by Y date or loose network access" like it is with NAP and SCCM.

I mean, it won't ever happen in the real world, but that's how it should be.

Or maybe the world just needs to get used to the idea of maintenance windows...

Is this true?

Are Windows 7/8 much of a botnet like Windows 10?
Which OS is most commonly used by you and your workmates at home?

Largely no. At least, not in OSG (Windows, Office, etc).

I could see PowerBI pulling this type of shit, but that's mostly an internal tool.

I wish I could describe in gory detail exactly where this is wrong, but LCA has been known to troll Sup Forums, and like I said, they scare me.

>botnet
I'll answer this if you can actually give me a valid definition for botnet.

>says everything else
>won't disprove this
People who sign NDAs should jump off bridges.

POO

Please share your opinion on the future of the vidya division, and also the windows 10 botnet

While not in your screen cap, that thread made a couple comments about check-in's breaking the build, and "sauce" getting in lots of trouble.

Except that there is a build master, and code review is a thing. There's no way an SDE1 would be able to break anything.

Also, is he a puppet there?

>Please share your opinion on the future of the vidya division, and also the windows 10 botnet
I'm tired and I've been drinking, so you're going to have to spoon feed me.

>What did he mean by this?

>Also, is he a puppet there?
Satya? No. No more than any other CEO is. Remember, the board has all the power. The CEO just runs the company day-to-day.

We on Sup Forums overuse word botnet too much, but it usually reffers to telemetry and data mining.

PC as a cinsumer product is slowly dying and the mobile department blew it, what's MS next focus, besides cloud stuff?

Are they going to kill the vidya division in favor of Microsoft branded vidya pc s?

Is Windows 10 the ultimate ad Google-esche shitfest?

How bad is Neon and when will it be released? It has come to my attention that Windows 10 frequently takes screenshots of user activity and sends it to your street shitting task force.

Enlighten me insider.

>Sure, but it should simply be "install X patches by Y date or loose network access" like it is with NAP and SCCM.
I don't think that would go over as well. Instead of, "We're helping you stay updated," it becomes, "YOU MAY ONLY ACCESS THE INTERNET WITH OUR PERMISSION!"
A boot is something normies do daily. Having your internet purposely broken and being told you're being forced into a manual reboot it to fix it is not.

>telemetry and data mining.
So, these to me are two different things.

>telemetry
This is a thing I really like. I get feedback on exactly what's going on and where I'm bogging down. For example, program X forking Y causing a spike in drive response time.

>data mining
I think of this as user data mining. It's bullshit. There's something to be said for getting to know the user so you can be genuinely useful, but to monetize that is an entirely new level of corporate evil.

Satya has said we're cloud first / mobile first.

Azure and O365 are growing, so that's good.

Enterprise has always been among the top focuses, and I don't see that changing.

I don't think so, but I'm not in that group.

>Windows 10 frequently takes screenshots of user activity
If you're using an alpha or very early beta build, or have opted into the fast ring inside builds, I can see that being a thing. Though less so with actually publicly released builds.

Also, Neon will forever be the first release Xbox 360.

I thought halon was completely inert noble gas and only killed you by suffocation?

Like I said, that's just my opinion. I don't think it will ever happen.

Yeah. Pushes the air out of your lungs specifically. At least, that's what we were told when we received "halon training".

How much does MS care about users with pirated software, specially Office and can they even tell? Assuming it happens on private use level and not something like an entire company niggering stuff.

Asking for a friend.

>If you're using an alpha or very early beta build, or have opted into the fast ring inside builds, I can see that being a thing. Though less so with actually publicly released builds.

Finally I can put this meme to rest. There is this guy posting some decrypter shit that produces .bin files which he converts to .png. It shows screenshots of user activity few minutes ago. He intercepted the outgoing packets and turned them into .png files.

He's a microsoft shill, not a chemist. Don't read too much into his comments on gasses.

>OP knows vaguely about anything other than his job
>he doesn't even care or have a solid opinion on anything about his employer
Sounds pretty legit. He is the perfect corporate profile

Does the company know at some level that you're pirating? Likely, yes. It's an incremental counter when someone tries to activate a key, or the install ID and GUID as done by something like KMSPico or Daz.

Do they care? Again, I'm sure at some level. But from a business perspective it doesn't make any sense to engage an attorney that costs more in an hour than a Windows or Office license.

An entire company on the other hand, you better prepare your anus.

I've pulled apart telemetry data. The scream is encrypted, and the key a guarded secret. So unless the guy has the key, I'm pretty sure it's bullshit.

what are the main issues that windows has that make it slow?

User error / antiquated hardware
Or both.

This is it
Pajeet shill exposed

So congrats to you guys for out apple-ing apple this year. surfacebook and surface studio hit it out of the park. Who was behind this push really ?

I personally use Debian + cinnamon on macbook hardware and managed to ditch windows permantly in 2014 (wont get into it) I understand you guys just want everyone on win 10 but let me tell you a story.

i have a close chiq friend that does media production (drawing) on an older touch tablet. The win 10 drivers dont work on her machine and borked it. She needed at least win 7 sp2 to run Adobe CC. i helped her do a fresh install the other day.

>install 7 30minutes
>activate
>install drivers
>dont work need special order
>download drivers all it once with special manufacturers app
>uses tonnes of mobile bandwidth
> get win7 working
> download the update updater so i can
> download the convienience update
> update windows
> reboots
> remove GWX because 10 doesnt work on her hardware
> Then remove telemetry installed with the convenience update


Seriosus Question - Do you honestly think people will put up with this shit much longer ? It took two people half a day to get a functional system for work. it took me 5 minutes to install linux mint mint and we were drawing with the stylus in GIMP and i could walk away.

Do you think Microsoft made a mistake with win7 telemetry and do you think a live linux stick is less stressful than a windows install in 2017 ?

Why did you guys screw with Windows 7 update? I have SP1 ISO with authentic license key. I can't update it anymore. It keeps "Checking for updates" for 10 years.

Something about an unofficial SP2 for Windows 7 where I have to manually patch things to get updates. This is horrifying.

I don't think Microsoft cares about the state of installing an obsolete OEM OS on an obsolete tablet.
Windows 10 installs in 10 minutes.

>10 minutes
Fucking liar. I installed Windows 10 when it was free and it took a long time on a modern desktop computer.

Torrent that shit instead

Microsoft fucked over the ISO downloads from their website on purpose to drive more win10 installs which 'just werks'.

I have a legit key which activates and my Win 10 upgrade was also based on this. Why am I being denied the right to use something I paid for?

In the past I got Vista Home and XP Home versions for my office computers. It is worth the investment.

Never activate first. That's just silly.

I'm not sure why you had issues with the driver order. I suspect it may be machine specific.

8.1 and (ugh) 10 are better about drivers with Windows Update, but in my experience they tend to fuck up the Intel GPU drivers.

>Seriosus Question - Do you honestly think people will put up with this shit much longer ?
Serious answer - Yes. Because people are stupid. We live in a world where nobody actually wants to fix anything, they just use a hash tag.

Fringe cases are one thing, but if your shit was on the Windows HCL, you're using the version of Windows it's certified for, and the hardware is good, I'd call and complain. The problem is going to be proving it's a Microsoft error. But if you can, unload on the support team. Make them fix that shit.

There's a regression bug in windows update. If you have PowerShell V3 this should work, but I haven't tested it.

Function WSUSUpdate {
$Criteria = "IsInstalled=0 and Type='Software'"
$Searcher = New-Object -ComObject Microsoft.Update.Searcher
try {
$SearchResult = $Searcher.Search($Criteria).Updates
if ($SearchResult.Count -eq 0) {
Write-Output "There are no applicable updates."
exit
}
else {
$Session = New-Object -ComObject Microsoft.Update.Session
$Downloader = $Session.CreateUpdateDownloader()
$Downloader.Updates = $SearchResult
$Downloader.Download()
$Installer = New-Object -ComObject Microsoft.Update.Installer
$Installer.Updates = $SearchResult
$Result = $Installer.Install()
}
}
catch {
Write-Output "There are no applicable updates."
}
}

WSUSUpdate

Note - I didn't write this. But it's something I use when I run into issues. I don't recall where I found it. It's also something that I only use at home, because again, I didn't write it.

Windows is insecure botnet shit. You should be slapped silly for comparing it to any UNIX or Linux OS, even macOS.

>Why am I being denied the right to use something I paid for?
It might be the whiskey talking, but I'm not following. What are you trying to activate. Windows 7 or Windows 10?
If you're trying to activate both, you're double dipping, so gratz.

If you're just trying to activate Windows 10 and can't do it online, call it in.

Usually, the key gets embedded in the uEFI, but not every system has uEFI. If anything in the upgrade chain was ever OEM, and you don't have that machine anymore, you're technically in violation of your license.

However. Calling to activate should work fine, even if you'd rather drown in a pool of your own vomit (I know I would)

Will Microsoft ever get rid of the two control panel thing?
It's fucking stupid that i need to check in both to changes something
Also there are a lot of icons still with the XP layout, for example when you are already uninstalling something and try to uninstall another program the system shows pic related, and that fucking icon in 10 years has never been changed.
How lazy could they be at Microsoft?
Also any chance for Explorer with tabs?

I wanted to go back to 7. I formatted my Win 10 HD and clean install Windows 7. It activates, no problem.

I can't update it due to the bug.

It's not a bug, MS intentionally crippled all the win7 ISO's and/or their update service.

Lurking for this

why is there a windows store on windows server ?

Do you need a bag for all that edge?

>Will Microsoft ever get rid of the two control panel thing?
I'm sure, eventually.

See, this is the one thing that Apple got right. From m68K to PPC, there was a cut off. No more legacy support. Then again from PPC to x86.

Though that wouldn't really work, because LOB developers are also equally lazy and retarded, and breaking compatibility is a bad thing.

>It's not a bug
Yes, it is. Too many people use Windows 7 internally for testing. I think 7 needs to die in a fire, but that's just me.

> MS intentionally crippled all the win7 ISO's and/or their update service
[citation needed]

Because it includes a large portion of the libraries the SCCM company portal needs.

And it would have been extra work to remove it.

Could you please give percentages of minorities in your workforce?

>Could you please give percentages of minorities in your workforce?
That's HR data. All I can tell you is what I see walking down the hall.

Being white, I'd say I'm a minority. But it depends on the group, as well.

Could you please specify on the majorities there?

Trans?
Jeets?
Chinks?
Nigs?
Women?

No, because I don't care enough to pay that much attention.

Can I get back the windows 7 old control panel please? I really hate touch shit on the desktop

Alright, it's been 3 hours, I'm out...

google godmode folder

Thanks for the reply winbro. I should have worded my questions better.

1) Who was responsible for the hardware wins you had this year and have they been promoted ?

2) Who was the sadistic person that developed the win8 metro interface or the marketing guy that pushed that on everyone - and have they been summarily executed ?

FFS i am a veteran tech dude and helping people with windows 8 made feel like an 80yr old with Alzheimers - i didn't know where anything was and still don't.

What state do you live in? I'm curious, for the demographics data.

nite winbro

plz answer before you go

cheers