How long would it take to go from know nothing newfag with no programming experience to learn enough to get a job as...

How long would it take to go from know nothing newfag with no programming experience to learn enough to get a job as entry level code monkey?

I'm 30 with nogf or pets and live in my dads basement, if it helps.

Maybe about a year of 6-7 hours, five days a week

Should've gone to college you fat greasy fuck

Bump

Why bump? You got your answer. Kys, code monkeys are practically free with the tide of oajeets, and you don't seem to have the drive to be anything more if you haven't accomplished anything in 30 years.

>Should've gone to college you fat greasy fuck

I did but I dropped out.

>Dropped out.

As soon as any recruiter sees that, you're fucked. You are going to have to produce some extremely good projects and show you are capable. Shit like FizzBuzz or a recursive Fibonacci function ain't gonna cut it.

You can forget about a job in software business. The market it saturated, no one will hire a guy who started programming at 30.

>too dumb for college
You're fucked, maybe lease your ass to the highest bidder

>recursive Fibonacc
>recursive
>O(2^n) complexity
Seems this board is lacking tonight

>As soon as any recruiter sees that, you're fucked

why? what if I tell them I am going back to school?

Graduates are employed not because they are any good, because 80% of them are crap, but because they have shown they can tolerate 3+ years of the same old shit under "pressure". They've shown they can turn up to a place, do as their told, and occasionally produce half decent work if they can be bothered.

You have "drop out" on your CV.

You're not completely fucked, but you're fighting a tough battle.

Shows you don't have the fortitude to see something through to completion. They'll be interviewing the hundreds of competitors who completed school the first time before they'll contact you.

Stick with food service. You might get a promotion.

>Seems this board is lacking tonight

Somehow, I forgot how autistic this board is.

Just half read something and go full sperge mode to show how very smart you are.

Oh, well, if you're going back to school (I assume school means college/university) and obtain a half decent degree, then you'll be fine. You will get asked in interviews about this gap, so have a good answer.

>You have "drop out" on your CV.

I dropped out more than 8 years ago. I won't have it on my cv. I just won't have a college diploma listed..

No, I didn't mean you literally have it on your CV but it's implied. No cunt puts "Drop out" on their CV unless they're a Sup Forums autist.

>not realizing you're in a den of autism

That's maybe even worse... They might assume you didn't go to college for a criminal record or something. Why'd you drop out? College is great, and the women are fantastic

>Oh, well, if you're going back to school (I assume school means college/university) and obtain a half decent degree

I - plan - on going back but I would like to get a job before that.

>Graduates are employed not because they are any good
> but because they have shown they can tolerate 3+ years of the same old shit under "pressure"

Do you mean good as in smart? Plenty of employers don't have the highest standards for such things.

So from the employers perspective according to you, they are getting exactly the good type of employee they want.
Graduates are employed because the fed is still playing their game, what is it 10 years now with basically free interest?
The money doing all this hiring is literally coming out of nowhere.

If you guys are worried now, wait a few years. The next recession will make the last one look small. I really hope i'm wrong in the end, but the math and logistics make it basically a fact that the bubble will burst. We still haven't even recovered from the last cluster fuck. Save up your money retards.

>Why'd you drop out? College is great, and the women are fantastic

I was sad, couldn't make any friends. still don't have any friends, and sad.

You're retarded
Only the naive recursive algorithm(s) has(have) a shitty complexity
You can easily implement a recursive solution in O(n)

>be college freshman
>be failing classes due to no friends and depression
>think everything will be ok
>read this thread

I guess I'll just kms right now before I become like OP.

You're too late to start. You'll hit a wall.

This was exactly me 4 years ago.
Didn't have any real friends for the entirety of my four years.

I was so hopeful as a freshman, I laugh at the thought now.
My grades were so shit at first, but by second half of sophomore year I said fuck it and sat the fuck down to do calculus and thermo and shit.

Just get it over with. I just graduated and it feels amazing to have so much weight off my shoulders. I have recruiters emailing me multiple times a week.
Get some etizolam, some caffeine pills and get your shit together. School isn't that hard aside from a few crazy binges here and there to study.

>didn't go to college for a criminal record
I'm 20, I have a criminal record (drug possession) and am currently in my 2nd year in the 2nd best uni in my country. Why would you not go to uni for a criminal record?

ok. but I don't have the courage to kill myself. what am I suppose to do?

I learned to code at 29. I'm 35 now and have a generous income as a result. Don't fall for the university Jew trying to guilt you into attending lessons and putting you in debt for eternity.

did you have a hard time getting a job? did people judge you like itt? was learning it by yourself a big challenge, like more so than getting a job?

I'm 21. I'm literally too autistic to even go near a school or an office or anything with people. I dropped out of HIGH SCHOOL, and obviously college was out of question, because I just wouldn't go there of my own accord.

Take the time to remember me whenever you think your career is going badly. I have fun as a hobbyist programmer/arch ricer though. I unironically plan to commit suicide if something ever goes wrong and I have to be near people again.

that's sad. I hope you don't get to my age and regret living with nothing to show but too stubborn to die. I am too weak to contemplate suicide.

I'm self-employed. Learning is as easy or as difficult as you make it. You just need to be dedicated and treat it as a job almost. Try to rid yourself of any distractions.

what do you advise is a good place to newbs to start? both learning and soliciting jobs/job experiences.

Sometimes people are really born special and it's nothing but a tragedy in those cases.

6 months to learn basic web development (html, css, javascript, jquery, bootstrap, git)
Some frameworks on top of that (react or angular)
Database (mySQL)
Learn Git
Learn how to install Arch Linux

Another way is to learn mobile app development iOS preferably. You will need Mac or Macbook for that.

He's a 30 year old loser, you think he can all of the sudden accomplish something like this?

You ahve nothing to lose and everything to gain. Just go for it.

You can easily become a web guy. I have some freinds who are complete tech illiterates but sell shitty wordpress sites and get good money with that.

From the wordpress-stage you can slowly upgrade to understanding HTML and CSS. Then you need to dabble into real programming, Javascript and some backend language (i.e. python).

All in all I'd say one year to get good enough to be halfwaay decent. Maybe one more year to get some cool websites for your resumee and some github portfolio. Since you are a dropout, they will probably hava a slightly higher bar for you, but it's not like you can't accomplish it.

The key is to have fun with what you are doing. Web dev is extremly confusing the first two months, because there's a lot of new stuff. But just pull through, you will understand the important basics it in no time.

C'mon man, you can do it!

He would have to throw out or burn all manga, animu weeb shit. Format all harddrives and focus on learning.

Learning is not hard, but abandoning old way of life at his age will be hard.

thanks guy

I don't watch animu. but I do have several TB of movies, tv shows and audiobooks that I don't want to part ways with.

OP please don't kernel mode setting yourself

Don't be so delusional, this isn't the 1950s.
30 is not old you retards, you won't have the same brain elasticity but you can definitely still make it if you are motivated and intelligent.
You will get paid the same as graduates, but it's still good money so not a big deal.

40 is where it gets too fuzzy. If you are a truly motivated person, you can learn an INSANE amount in a year. Monk mode works but it's not necessarily easy.

Stop pursuing "oh I want to do this, or that". Don't even make these threads OP. It's been literally proven that this type of validation from others NEVER ends up working in a context like this. You're an adult, shut the fuck up and get it done or remain poor and in regret.

dont listen to him, most software devs have no CS education.

6-7 hours a day of really intensive studying is almost impossible for the human brain. After years of practice and by taking regular breaks you might be able to push 4-5 hours a day of concentrated work.

If you manage to do that you could basically cram bachellor and prob. a master into 1 year.
Most college students dont work nearly as much or as hard as they think they do. Universities are aware of that which is why it takes 4 years for CS students to graduate.

this, for college students, and probably much more for autodidacts, you sometimes have to shut out how you feel and switch to machine-mode: Just plow through the subject like a robot doing on pset after the other, not caring about if you are motivated or not.

Stay the fuck away from sites such as guru, freelance.com, odesk... They are crawling with pakis and indians willing to work for 1$/hour. Thus the clients that are on those sites are just as clueless as the freelancers there.
Best way: Cold call (if permitted in your country) the local businesses and introduce yourself and your sevices. Works best for Webstuff or if you have experience configuring/customizing MSOffice or ERP systems.
I found some clients by joining local meetup.com groups (have business cards ready, oldfashioned but always popular. Vistaprint has great prices)

this.
Also do not forget to learn your data structures and algorithms. Those are universal and language independent. Knowing the right algorithm can mean the difference between chipping away at a hard problem for month and kinda-sorta solving it if the user does not input too crazy stuff, and solving it perfectly in a few hours.

And stay away from negative boards. I went cold turkey on /r9k/ and have not regretted it. Those people drag you down with their depressions.

>'s been literally proven that this type of validation from others NEVER ends up working in a context like this

I don't understand. what do you mean? Is there some study that shows I will fail if I try?

>bachellor and masters in 1 year

In what universe is this even remotely possible?

India. Not joking.

No seriously. For the bachelor I am not kidding. A real bachelor, not some IISS garbage (Indian Institiute of Street Shitting).
Master might indeed by a bit of a hyperbole.

we're full

just lie lmao praise kek 420 xDxD delet

Bullshit. You can learn to code in your 60s.
Stop that youth-worship please.