You wake up in the Roman Empire

>you wake up in the Roman Empire

probably the best thing to happen in my life

immediately enlist and die happy

They actually appreciate my small dick I'm a god to them since big dicks were laughed at back then.

*get eaten by a dinosaur*

>find a little boi

That's Greeks, not Romans

I immediatly masturbate.

Go to the nearest public bath

>immediately enlist and die happy with my dick broken off in some Italian whore
+1

enjoy my bread and circus

This.

>wake up
>have knowledge of basic hygiene
>know how to create shit that seem simple to you, but other worldly to them
>Start a small business of this shit
>learn Latin along the way
>Emperor hears of this
>Become bros with Emperor
>get invited to all the Orgies
>pick out a virgin qt commoner to die happy with
>have kids
>die happy

whats better than that?

Name one thing you could build by yourself that the Romans couldn't.

A battery, gunpowder, a magnet

>In the province of Judaea

All you need is gunpowder and you just boosted the empire 1000 years ahead of everyone else in the world

Easy, mathematics (especially the arabic numbers), geometry, geographical knowledge, physics

Also knowing simple aerodynamics is revolutionary

Do you know how to make those things from scratch and without modern machines?

I'd think of the steam engine first

t. Goldbergstein
Thank you Mr. Leibowitz

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A dynamo, battery, gunpowder, the internal combustion engine, all are pretty simple in their design.

Gunpowder is just three ingredients, the most difficult one to find being abundant around Pompeii.

A water filter, food preservation like pickling, and on top of that, you could probably become some glorified chef by preparing dishes that the Romans have never seen
>give Augustus the secrets of the burger
You could make a battery with salt water or acid and some metal. Lookup the Baghdad batteries
Gunpowder is saltpeter, sulfur, and carbon
A magnet is pretty simple to make too. Just get a nail, wrap it in a wire, and hook the wire to a battery

I have a degree in mechanical engineering, so i'd probably contribute quite a bit in several fields.

ok then

also, depending on the zeitgeist, I'd publish the works of a philosopher I feel would best improve human civilization, while at the same time not being too far ahead of the time.

Going back in time to the Classical-era with all the shit I know (especially about history)? Wew lad. The rest of you can have fun being plebs and inventing shit, I'll be busy becoming a God/time traveler by preventing major things from happening.

You'd change one thing and then your knowledge would be irrelevant because the timeline would be different

...

>Stopping the assassination of Julius Caesar would somehow affect natural disasters or impact the lives of others important figures who have nothing to do with Caesar.

K.

I'd be a Greek Teacher fucking Roman boipucc of course!

>Brush and bucket
>Whipped by master

sippin that fine whine in the symposium with tha boiz brutus and marcus with some bad ass hoes from the plebian quarters

You're a moron if you honestly don't think that stopping the assasination of Julius Caeser wouldn't reshape history. Yeah, natural disasters will still happen so you could probably warn the people of Pomeii about the volcano or warn the people of 1906 San Francisco about the earthquake, but each one of those actions carries a consequence.
For example:
>help stop plague with knowledge of medicine
>some guy who should have died goes on to make a family
>someone who never should have existed becomes a major influence on the world
>Nigeria is now a world superpower or some shit
>some other guy who should have died cucks one of your ancestors
>now you're in an existential crisis

>You wake up in the Holy Roman Empire

Should warn people about threat of Christianity and abrahamic religions at all. Also would try to convince people since 3rd century to invent feudalism to remain stronk and evade 3rd century collapse.

Telegraph
Sound recorder
Lathe and milling machines.
40 degree booz producing machine
Steam engine

Chinese new gunpowder already so no.

>you wake up in the Roman Empire
>as a pleb

But i allready do wake up there every day

But it wasn't being used in Europe at the time.

It wasn't being used in firearms

Laugh at Charlememe for not knowing how to read

...

a 1957 Oldsmobile

this desu

Nigeria stronk

It splits off into another timeline

>those "footwear"
this nigga needs to learn how to dress desu

REMOVE BARBARIANS

>Turkey
>illegitimate
Why? Same people, same culture, same border and same laws in a much grade
>Western Empire
>illegitimate
Why? People in the West thought they live in a Roman Empire until the High Medieval. Actually it was mostly economy that have changed, Empire transited from slavery to feudalism and became feudal state with nominal emperor and actual kingdoms. Roman laws remained, Christianity remained, people remained too (barbarians became romanised in a few generations, not talking about barbarians who lived already in Empire before the 5th century before the rush).
>Russian empire
It was pure meme of 16th century and it was based on religion completely. Russia was seen by patriarch as the main orthodox state and hence the successor of orthodox Byzantium and """"orthodox""""" Rome.

>being this jealous

Barbarians were okay. The problem were Christians and unability of empire to rebuild economy.

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No need to tip this hard

Western Rome fell because of all the shitty infighting and petty squabbles not because of Christianity

Cristianos ad leones.

>jealous
>mentioning that Third Rome concept is a hilarious religion meme
Christians fought an education, science and every good thing the Rome had. They were the reason of decline of freedom in Rome. Under christian influence people stopped to buttfuck, think freely, maintain libraries.
>infighting
That was a result of inability of Empire to rebuild economy to feudal basis and it was made in 5th century when barbarians invaded and emprerors started to give land for protection of Empire establishing feudalism.
It's not correct to talk about fall of Roman Empire. It was gradual transition that took time from 200-1000 years. People in Europe were sure they live in a Roman Empire, used roman laws long after 476.

You completely ignored my post and proceeded to make things up

I'd hope to be born under Nero or Hadrian, and then genocide the Jews.