Google

How do I get a tech job at Google?

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be female
be a minority
be a female minority
be transgender

those are your 4 options
i recommend pretending to be a tranny, that usually works

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Rub some shit on your skin and tuck your dick

I wonder if I imply I'm trans on an application if it'll help.

At Google?

Definitely.

Seeing as 90% of their employees are white or asian males which don't satisfy any of those condiitions, you're retarded.

That is not true.

Today Google is at least 40% White or Asian female.

But if I show up and look perfectly normal, wouldnt they question me?

That's why they're desperate for subhumans and queers.

Still much higher than 0%.

>But if I show up and look perfectly normal, wouldnt they question me?
just pretend to be mentally ill

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Create an russian horseshoe review imageboard and sell it to a Vietnamese version of yourself.

don't lump pajeets there, they got to the top fair and square.

You can't change your gender and there are only two.

They aren't desperate for queers - most gays are white or asian and in tech anyway.
Every tech company that doesn't lose money has more than a fair share of gays.

Male and shemale.

One is "social construct" and the other "doesn't matter"

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Serious answer:
>be from a decent uni
>have personal projects or internships (preferably both)
>be able to pass phone screen
>be able to whiteboard random leetcode-like questions
>be halfway socially-competent

There really isn't anything special about Google's recruiting pipeline, despite what """self-taught""" sperglord NEETs on Sup Forums will tell you otherwise.

>But if I show up and look perfectly normal, wouldnt they question me?
That's the thing about being a tranny. You don't have to be taking hormonal supplements, or be changing your looks/gender, you can just say you are and they're not allowed to question it because you can kick up a PR shitstorm.
>"Google humiliated me by asking me to prove I'm a transsexual!! #transrights #LGBTQIA+ #killGoogle"
Twitter and tumblr would be grabbing their torches and pitchforks.

I was looking at jobs in the UK (don't ask) and every company had a note saying something to the effect of "If you're an immigrant, minority, or have a different sexual orientation we encourage you to apply because we wish to diversify." i'm a radical leftists, communist, etc. but I am getting annoyed at the preferential treatment non-Europeans and non-cisgendered people are getting in Europe. Fuck, employ all Europeans first then give out jobs to the rest of the world. Immigrants either hoard money or send it back home, they don't wish to spend any more money in Europe than they have to. They only pay taxes here cause they're forced to, and I bet most of them find ways to cheat tax codes "I pay money to cousin Abdul's Syrian refugee fund, I swear! Look, Abdul gave me receipts!"

Become a transgender.

I put my gender as 'other' on every official form I sign.

When I end up graduating and trying to get a job in a large organisation, it will pay off.

did you not reed that googler redpill manifesto?

Not be white or right-leaning / conservative.

what do you think will happen to that guy?

(((they))) will fire him, possibly kill him

>How do I get a tech job at Google?
Step 1, become a non-white female minority with a disability claim that you also are a sexual minority

Google won't do anything because they're a tolerant and inclusive workplace for all opinions... Until media shitstorm dies down and they'll eventually defame him and demote him to a lowly position that forces him to quit.

They'll put him in a correctional labor camp (the one where moot is currently """working""" in)

wrongthink must be eliminated

Had the chance to study a semester at stanford and met a lot of people who work for google and facebook.

Lots of indians and chinese work there. Maybe half of the workforce. The explanation is easy: All the top universities skim of the talent of large populous countries. If 1% of a population is hyper talented you have a pool of 200m with india and china combined, while you only have 3m in the USA. There is no race agenda at the hiring process for engineers. It is just much easier to find a capable and cheap pooinloos or chinks than crackers.

She's cool

Step 1:
Be Jewish woman
There is no step 2.

Wear a dress and thigh-high striped socks to the HQ, and you will get instantly hired.

a) be jewish
b) be sexual deviant
c) be transsexual
d) be left-wing activist well known in the twittersphere
e) be an ethnic minority
f) be a loud woman

in reality, you generally need to know someone in google to get into google.
Failing that, be a loud over-opinionated and ludicrously dressed women/tranny and you should be a-okay

>She

user, I...

so when are google going to be hit with an antitrust lawsuit?

Don't agree with this
archive.is/lRhKg

you:
be salty

>this is considered a proper argument on Twitter

Why would you even want to? It really is all about the money and if you were smart enough you would want to work on Wall St instead.

>Two charts and several hyperlinks are also omitted.
does anyone have the original?

say youre trans

> if you were smart enough you would want to work on Wall St instead
And you believe that why? Because you watched Wolf of Wall Street with your bros? Google is way more fun to work at than the financial sector where they expect you to work from 7am to 11pm while clocking 8 hours. Also tech industry doesn't care as much about University degrees and your tech industry job won't get replaced by a computer in 5 years.

Be a girl who knows how to code, a pajeet, or both

Money is where the real power lies. If one wants to work for a company that thinks controlling the internet will give them power over people, why not go to a place where I can really do that?

MK Ultra of course.

You seem upset roastie

The takeaway is that this guy didnt get one because he's a whiny little bitch. I don't care how "progressive" the company is are nobody wants to hire a pathetic whiner that doesnt take responsibility for his own failure.

So to actually get a good job:
1-be really good at it
2-take responsibility for your own successes and failures. don't be a whiny little bitch

Guess you didn't know you can actually do both - I work at a tech firm with all the google-like perks (and a lot of ex google people) on wall street. Using fancy machine learning systems to trade is really taking off.

Expect for the fact that none of them can read or write in English....

>Deconstructing borders
by eating them?

Be a meme master.

Why would you want to be around these idiots?

either:
do something that becomes high profile.
go to some meme school like Stanford.
apply and actually get selected.
that's pretty much it.

Money.

1. be white woman
2. be minority woman
3. be minority man
4. be lgbt
5. be above average iq white male with years of experience in the required fields

Except that they can to some degree. It's enough to get the job done. These immigrants don't care to socialize with the whiney whites

>pathetic whining which is really about his own failure
good job showing everyone how not to get ahead in the world

send them 5 pages of "black lives matter" as application letter

i can guarantee you that jia lia is smarter than everyone in this thread by a hefty margin.

do you have any sources for that claim? lol i guess it's just alternative facts

>be female
>be a minority
>be a female minority
>be transgender

Be transgender minority

Attach "communist_manifesto.pdf" to your application.

you sound insecure

Have somebody recommend you. Somebody my dad's dad knows works for Google and gave me a recommendation. I got a call from HR in less than a week after applying. Didn't pass the interview though.

Pretend like you know a bunch of random BS but actually just know how to poorly re-implement existing technology with a huge privacy-stealing botnet in the middle of it.

cant be long now before men go "trans" en-mass to improve their employment prospects

you can just lie about being a fag or identifying as a woman if needed

Just play their stupid game and say you identify as a tranny non binary gender fluid whatyoumacallit. Literally no way to prove it or test you on it, otherwise they'd be gender discriminating you. For bonus points show up with teal colored hair.

Just be a crossdressing twink like me or a tranny and they'll hire you on the spot

>How do I get a tech job at Google?

She's not even an engineer, just some marketing cunt. You can easily fuck your way to the top for that.