I just found out I am a jew

I just found out I am a jew

Other urls found in this thread:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myer
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sidney_Myer
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

pay dept

use your newfound abilities to sniff out small coins and plot the destruction of western civilisation

Now Germany really has to pay you

the thing with being jewish is that everbody else already knows

and I thought my nose being big was only just a greek thing haha...

Choose one:

>pay shekels
>oven

Consider suicide

Actually Jews are responsible of the suicides of thousands and thousands of socially awkward white males with their propaganda since decades.

Thanks Ben.

mazel tov

How do you know i was talking about americans jews? you read in my mind with your kabbalistic kike powers that Moloch gives you at your reptilian ceremony?

fuck off smelly hebe. This is an /aryan/ board

oy vey nazism on the rise again

Sup, you're not alone by any means.

being jewish is a choice

so fuck off back to your goy life and forget about it

s-so i can be jew if i want?

>Jewish
>debnts

>implying
filthy shkutz

No biggie. There are lots of us everywhere.
It makes the paranoid Goyim scared.

I just found out I am a greek

No you're just a Turanic slavshit roleplaying ancient sandnigger merchants!

Bad news, Greek.

if you convert, yes

hundreds of thousands do so every year

when is your bar mitzvah?

yes obviously but it's not like christianity and islam where you just show up at the place of worship and become one

if you've got no jewish ancestry becoming a jew is a long procedure which involves actual studying and stuff. nobody is going to encourage you from within the religion to convert, it has to be a genuine personal choice.

Please tell the background story.

>fat greek for your entire life
>finally able to see your penis with a mirror
>it is circumcised
NOOOO!

>France
why we are so cucked? why they are everywhere in television but you never meet them in the street? why there are a jewish defense league militia never punished?

There is loads of Sephardi ancestry around that area. From Italy to Turkey.

It's not highly unlikely that someone from these places had a Jewish ancestor.

>nobody is going to encourage you from within the religion to convert
tell that to chabad

Am I jewish if I am 1/8th related to one on my mother's side?
Can I get a citizenship to Israel even though I am Catholic?

A Jewish grandparent doesn't make you Jewish, unless you inherit the name.
Even Nazi-Germany didn't consider people Jewish if they had just one Jewish grandparent.

>Make kabbalah shekel, pay debt
>Oven
Choose one

What would happen if I converted to every major religion at the same time?

Probably but you'd need to provide some proofs from god knows where

who gives a shit about chabad lol. also I seriously doubt they're going around trying to convert goys, even if their judaism-pushing agenda could make it look that way

Spiritual bluescreen, and you would behead yourself

I wish I had it saved, but there was a genetic study that showed Jewish and Greek DNA being very close to one another.

If any goy has it please post it.

If you're a Jew you're a Jew for life

You can convert to Judaism and then be like "ayyy senpai I'm gonna practice Hinduism" and there's absolutely nothing a Rabbi can do to un-Jew you

Chabad believes conversion should be encouraged for gentiles "in the Jewish community"

It's basically a way to get gentile women to convert so their kids are Jewish in accordance to the halacha

>Germany

cucked forever into Oblivion

How far down the line can it be?

Also, i'm pretty sure an ansestor is one of the Myer family who started a pretty wealthy store chain: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Myer

i'm distantly related to this guy I think:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sidney_Myer

Interesting. Do you know how many extra days off I'd get if I joined every religion? It's protected by the Swedish constitution, I'd get paid for doing nothing.

Just making sure I don't come home one day to a guy in a long beard caving in my skull with a stone plate carrying the ten commandments.

You enter anti-nirvana and revert to the lowest level of the circle of rebirth, living out the rest of your days as a single celled organism, trapped in a human's body.

I am greek

Become bahaii.

>**i'm distantly related to this guy I think:

he didn't have kids, so I think it is his brother, who was also an executive.

You need two Jewish grandparents to be a real jew according to the Nazis/Israelis

Since you're Greek your "jewish" ancestors may have just been a bunch of phonies who converted to new wave hipster rabbinical Judaism between 500 - 0 B.C.

I doubt it's really only 5% unfavorable in Germany. I bet a lot of Germans are simply afraid to tell anyone, including a pollster, their real opinion.

That or the post-WWII reeducation campaign was amazing.

>short
>lots of body hair, back looks like a carpet
>greedy
>have jewish friends and visit Israel every now and then
>love hummus
>jewish ancestry

>intact dick

That was close. 100% pure white lusitanian.

i don't have any direct jewish ancestry but there are jews that have either of my last names
i kinda like my shekels so i don't think i'll be doing a genetic test anytime soon

Bilel pls

Answer me pls

>How far down the line can it be?

>You need two Jewish grandparents to be a real jew according to the Nazis/Israelis

Israel allows Aliyah if you had one Jewish grandparent.

Wait I thought you needed your mother to be jewish in order to be considered a jew?

One grandparent, not two.