Tfw being an American

>tfw being an American
LITERALLY a a better feeling that sex

I bet it is.

That sensation having shit in your pants feels good, doesn't it?

>tfw you will never have the freedom to shart in the mart

the feeling of shit in your pants?

How would you know?

HOLY SHIT EUROPOORS ON SUICIDE WATCH

that's because you have never had sex yet.
how about being american and having sex?
think about it.

>tfw eating moms apple pie
>tfw watching a baseball game
>tfw playing catch with your boy
>tfw dumping a warm shart on a cold day
>tfw carving pumpkins for christmas
>tfw barbecued hotdogs and hamburgers
>tfw sipping a cold bottle of america with your friends

Hello everyone. I'm american and this is my experience with sharting. It firsted started when I was five, I went to the local Walmart with my mother, whom is a raging alcoholic. We were browsing the alcohol section while I noticed something. Brown stains at the back of her pants. It was as if someone stabbed her but instead of blood it was poop. It trickled down her fat legs and onto the dirty white floor. The smell was horrid.


I was shocked at first but momma quickly explained to me that there is nothing wrong with to and that the owners of Walmart even encourage it. You see, a long time ago when we were fighting the British our brave soldiers would shart to confuse them. While the British were wondering what the hell was happening our brave men would come out from behind the foliage, with the freshly made shart leaking out of their assholes and dripping down their flabby legs and they'd ambush them. The British never even stood a chance.

Sharting can never be forgotten, it is the thing which this proud nation is built upon. It is an American Tradition. One which we promised our forefathers we'd carry on. Now please excuse me, I have to take a trip to Walmart to honor my brave ancestors who fought off british tyranny.

>Mexico
>Australia
>Yurop
Nigga what

Europoor is a state of mind

>mexican education
Britain is not european anymore

>carving pumpkins for christmas
u wot?

>Sharting is a state of mind
FTFY

>LITERALLY a a better feeling that sex
how would you know?

SHART

>cultural enrichment
Have muslims fucked you so hard you can't read anymore?

>butthurt from sharting

They usually leave a few newspapers in the cask where your head falls into, you should know this Pablo

INTO
THE SHOPPING MALL
THE AMERICUNTS, THEY SHART

BROWN STAINS, AND STOMACH PAINS
IN THE AISLES OF OLD WALL MART

...

...

POO
IN
MOOMOO

(because you're also fat)

>tfw being UNian
LITERALLY a a better feeling that sex

You mean right near the mosque where they have swedish girl "enrichment" ceremonies?

Yea well you're talking about cut-dick sex here.

>tfw can now shit post from nippon
in n out >>>>>>>> 5 guys

SHART

Sex > shalting

When your mutilated penis barely has any sensitivity, a lot of things are going to be better than sex.

Gently rubbing your forehead, for instance.

top kek

Do Swedish girls fuck guys with uncut dicks or automatically assume he's a kuffar and GTFO?

SHART

IN

What even happened

>Hungry
>Go to the local store to buy some boxed lunch sushi
>Realize i really have to shart
>Remember that I am a sane human being
>Hold it in and shart once I get home using my high tech toilet

Don't forget the part where you spray your ass like a freak
Bidets are gross and I'm glad they're not in the US

Conosco ese sentido

SHART

FAR FROM THE LOO
AS THEY MAKE THEIR POO