I feel so pathetic. I am so lazy and have no expertise or in depth knowledge in anything...

I feel so pathetic. I am so lazy and have no expertise or in depth knowledge in anything. I have a stem degree I had no interest in so I forgot everything immediately. I put no effort in to it after a while and passed with an acceptable grade which is kind of an achievement but not really.

I have a low paying but outwardly respectable job but I do brain-dead shit and I do almost no work. Whenever I've had to stay from 9-5 at any job I felt like my life was immediately over. Or even 5 hour part time job shifts were unbearable.

I just wish I had the balls and work ethic to go home and work hard on one thing but you always get insulted if you don't do loads of shit. You like books? Well read shitloads of books and only read the ones praised by the dumb masses (classics and NYT best sellers). You want to learn programming? Masturbate with functional nonsense or else you're dumb.

And not only all that, I feel guilty over process as well. I am constantly trying to analyse my psychology as if I have no willpower. "Shall I exercise first and then do my chores? If I exercise first then I won't do the chores."

And for over 600 (probably no exaggeration) times in the past 3 years I have had junk food and coffee while telling myself it's the last time and tomorrow I will stop for a long time. And when I worked in an awful part time job I would always tell myself I'd work hard when I got home on intellectual stuff. And then I'd completely waste my free time on the internet.

I feel like I have been procrastinating starting real life because I see it as a load of shit I have to do to avoid being ostracised by society, rather than the stuff I want to do.

I could go on about being an ugly autist beta loser loner etc but I can't even enjoy my free time or make it productive. I see tonnes of attractive normies getting everything handed to them and it demoralises me so much. It is like salt in the wounds.

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> I have a stem degree I had no interest in so I forgot everything immediately.
Didn't this raise a red flag in your mind to study something else?

Anyway I'll have a whopper meal please, no cheese no mayo extra pickles

Get checked for ADHD

>implying a NEET will be serving you your next heart attack in a brown paper sack
Do even know what a NEET is?

Don't worry, unless you are a turbo madman, you are going to be lazy. Life is not about gaining knowledge or skills, if you feel like this is something that is interesting to you and can give you a lot of fun then learn/do it, it will be much more efficient this way. As for me I get those super strong inspirations by stuff (mostly vidya) and then I feel motivated to do something similar myself, I haven't really finished anything, because that takes a solid idea and not being that lazy, but I have learned numerous skills in the process. As for being a wageslave, I guess everyone becomes one, unless you get your own company or anything like that. I recently had a similar problem with my life, but you know what, I just follow my passions and thanks to that my life is both happy and interesting. Right now building stuff in Minecraft, I know it sounds pretty autistic, but damn I love to build stuff.

you aren't doing shit because you're thinking too damn much about everything, and then you read random bullshit online to feed the maw of your constantly chattering brain.

Stop thinking and be in the present. Do this long enough and you might be surprised to find yourself filling your time with more meaningful things.

Get a nice trade job and live with your parents indefinitely so you can spend all your money on vices.
It's pretty sweet my dude

he won't be a NEET forever lmao

I was like you until I recently stopped masturbating compulsively.

Do you know? He has a job.

nice blogpoast faggot

Maybe you're not ready to start real life yet. Go get a master's or something. That's what I did. Worked out well, although I almost dropped out. Met a qt waifu too.

Tbh just be content with it. Try to make it out of the ratrace early saving.

Is it really that bad you wont amount yo something great? Not really most people are pretty average.

Id kill for a job where i do nothing for 8 hours. Just web browse or something.

>I have a stem degree
every time some faggot has some shit-tier "STEM" degree instead of actual engineering, medicine/medical related, they just say "STEM"

hi /r9k/

install gentoo

Start being more active, stop eating like shit and try to care less about what others think unless they are actually right.
Everything else will get a lot easier after that.
Also taking some small (or not so small) doses of LSD or another psychedelic would likely help you changing bad habits in general.

i saw this thread on Sup Forums earlier today

ADD here. OP sounds kinda like me. I learn stuff but if i don't use what i've learned regularly my brain assumes i don't need the knowledge anymore and discards it.

You need a hobby. I recommend lifting. It will give your life purpose and you will become physically fit and have a higher chance of getting laid.

it's been on /sci/ and /lit/ as well

Sounds like some kind of executive function disorder, possibly a u t i s m like you said. Get the book by Daniel G. Amen. Please.

As I previously recommended, ADHD is an executive function disorder, but due to its name, people think its just hyper kids. It isn't the case.

Yeah, OP get checked for ADHD. I have it and spent two years after high school trying to battle it, but nothing ever worked. Got diagnosed, got some amphetamines, and now I'm no longer in the smart but lazy meme category. Stopped binge eating. Stopped being a jack of all trades, stopped procrastinating.

For the rest, all I can say is it doesn't get better. My dad died habitually unemployed doing on and off jobs. Couldn't hold down a job, but he could woo my mom into passing down his not-safe-for-modern-life genetics. Got to a point where I couldn't keep wasting my time and took the pharamceutical jew pill. Now, I've got a routine, long-term friends, and projects that make me money.

Free will is a lie.

> For the rest, all I can say is it doesn't get better.
> Now, I've got a routine, long-term friends, and projects that make me money.

Your problem being?

After sorting out medical problems (which you seemingly did) I say read some Wittgenstein, Nietzsche and Stirner. Free yourself of spooks, do something that's fun, become good at an art, build your body and set yourself a goal so high it'll crush you - and relish this feeling.

Do you have a pdf by any chance?

>Your problem being?
Shit, my bad. XR doesn't last long enough and I'm thinking a bunch of things, assuming others can make the connections, and leaving out the filler. Should be that, if the sum of all your "workarounds" (exercise, diet, sleep, supplementation, coping skills like journaling and liberal alarm setting, etc.) don't get you to a tolerable point in a year, it's not going to get better. It doesn't get better unmedicated. Do with this information, what you will.
>Free yourself of spooks, do something that's fun, become good at an art, build your body and set yourself a goal so high it'll crush you - and relish this feeling.
All ready in motion. Had a bunch of plans, like sticking through a bodybuilding routine and diet, for about 7 years, never accomplished any of them. Finally went through with it all and the results are kino.
>Wittgenstein, Nietzsche and Stirner.
Camus and Dumas ;)
There's a bunch of Amen's books on libgen.io

I am the same. Was diagnosed with adhd. But what can you do? The medication fucks with your heart. Heart rate increased by a lot so I quit medication.

What do

It's usually a gamut with meds. Not everyone can take amphetamines because they do fuck with BP and pulse. There's also methylphenidate (Ritalin) and its derivatives that are easier on the body (but no the mind WOO). Dextroamphetamine is also an option, it doesn't act as much on the body as levoamphetamine. There's also non-stimulant medication like strattera and wellbutrin.

If you can't get prescriptions for whatever reason, there's an alternative & research drug/nootropic scene on reddit that can point you at more things to try.

If you can't do that. Then if you're a fast metabolizer of coffee you can probably drink a lot of that (that's what I did before) and exercise daily.

Otherwise, idk.

You also have modafinil. Don't know how it helps ADHD, but for some it does. Not a stim.

>There's a bunch of Amen's books on libgen.io
Thanks. I had checked b-ok.org but all the links were dead.

I was on ritalin and later on concerta or something. Both fucked up my heart rate.

>There's also non-stimulant medication like strattera and wellbutrin.
First time I hear of these. How do they work, what do they do?

>If you can't get prescriptions for whatever reason, there's an alternative & research drug/nootropic scene on reddit that can point you at more things to try.
This sounds interesting, is this a general nootropics subreddit?

>Then if you're a fast metabolizer of coffee you can probably drink a lot of that (that's what I did before) and exercise daily.
I drink lots of coffee without sugar or milk, every day. But I don't exercise and I don't eat much anymore even though I used to eat a hell of a lot of food.

>libgen.io
Is that site legal?

dunno man. Coffee even used to noticeably and uncomfortably raise my heart rate, that's why don't drink it anymore. You shouldn't need to take drugs just to function normally like all these fuckwits do. It's all a bunch bullshit to get you hooked on expensive medications and a ploy to milk money out of you by making you a better, more productive good goy slave for the system

Definitely not but it's legit

OP, you need to look into Internet addiction. reddit.com/r/nosurf is a good resource, read the book called "The Shallows" by Nicholas Carr, that's a start. Using the Internet will rewire your brain such that you effectively have ADHD, you don't need medication right off the bat, so try to take some time to wean yourself off the Internet. Also this applies to other types of addiction as well (e.g. porn, etc.)

Generally, I want to avoid being diagnosed with some psychological disease, because that will go into "the system" and it'll be on your record.

Just be yourself lol

Doesn't load for me

if you don't like your life then change it

I don't know about usa but I chose to end medication and treatment altogether and it was allowed. Now I'm to pre-diagnose status basically.

I agree. Maybe there are people that legitimately suffer like with depression but I have a feeling most is misdiagnosed. Some people are more physically active and not fit for office jobs, programming etc, they shouldn't be told to take meds and slow down when it's not their nature

try gen.lib.rus.ec

>Wittgenstein, Nietzsche and Stirner
ah, the meme philosophers. Truly the pinnicle of enlightened thinking, no?

Read some Augastine and then get back to me bucko.

>Stopped being a jack of all trades
>becoming the undermensh
get off my board normie.

sounds like it could be pasta.

>I was on ritalin and later on concerta or something. Both fucked up my heart rate.
Unfortuneately, there's not a lot of things that raise dopamine and norepinephrine without raising the heart rate.

>First time I hear of these. How do they work, what do they do?
Norepinephrine reuptake inhibition. Supposedly supposed to help with the myriad of problems ADHD brings. Wellbutrin worked well for me when I wasn't getting vertigo.

>This sounds interesting, is this a general nootropics subreddit?
They're all spread out, nootropics is the biggest one afaik. You can search for something like (on google) "site:www.reddit.con adhd nootropics" to get a better view of everything.

>I drink lots of coffee without sugar or milk, every day. But I don't exercise and I don't eat much anymore even though I used to eat a hell of a lot of food.
Yeah. Stims make me smell like shit and no-sleep, so I can't have a perfectly normal life, but I can take that over being a loser. Exercise makes a difference too. When I was lifting everyday off meds, I could focus better.

>dunno man. Coffee even used to noticeably and uncomfortably raise my heart rate, that's why don't drink it anymore.
There's three genetic profiles for the gene that encodes the liver enzyme that metabolizes caffeine. Slow metabolizers, fast, and ultra. If you're slow, it can be damaging to your body over the long term and in high amounts. If you're not, it's a net benefit and you can drink that shit like water and get positives out of it. On the other hand, the effects only last for like an hour.
>You shouldn't need to take drugs just to function normally like all these fuckwits do. It's all a bunch bullshit to get you hooked on expensive medications and a ploy to milk money out of you by making you a better, more productive good goy slave for the system
Used to believe in that. Didn't want to be wired on drugs, a zombie, someone else, until I realized I had goals

Thanks!

>What do
become a creature of habit.

Start planning out schedules for yourself, and stick to them like your life depends on it, only deviating when there is a problem or interference. If you keep yourself to a routine your body will naturally begin to get better at consistency.

Meds are for the weak-willed anyways, only fags take medications. [Citations: me and every other ADHD chad i know]

>There's three genetic profiles for the gene that encodes the liver enzyme that metabolizes caffeine. Slow metabolizers, fast, and ultra. If you're slow, it can be damaging to your body over the long term and in high amounts. If you're not, it's a net benefit and you can drink that shit like water and get positives out of it. On the other hand, the effects only last for like an hour.
How can I find out which one I am?

R u me?

Adderall helped but began to wear off. When I first started taking it (about 10mg) I literately felt like I regained access to my long-lost brain. I had never been so productive. The pills started wearing off and even bumped up to 20mg but the foggy/guilty/procrastinater brain seeps back in.

It'll only get worse. Amphetamines and other stimulants like it are never a viable long term solution. Your best bet is to take a break from them and to see if they work again after that.

Any adhd guy here feel like progression of time is fucked? Usually going so fast you don't realize much at all until you check?

CYP1A2. Genetics test.
You can't will away a lobotomy.

>CYP1A2. Genetics test
Is that something you can just request the doctor to do for you? Do they literally tell you how you will metabolize coffee or will the test result be something cryptic you have to lookup?

>You can't will away a lobotomy.
nigger, i just fucking did.

>has degree
>brainlet
People like you are why I keep getting jobs that state "Bachelor's degree in related field minimum" with no degree

>Is that something you can just request the doctor to do for you? Do they literally tell you how you will metabolize coffee
Yes and yes.
Then were you ever really retarded?

When I drink coffee regurlarly I adjust to it and it leads to little if any ill effects. The upshot of this is that you start needing coffee to just get up in the morning and to function decently. I tried drinking it only occasionally, like once a month when I need that little boost, but it makes me feel like shit and fucks with my sleep, + I get palpitations, I get all sweaty, it's just no good.

>reading application requirements
>requires a degree
>requires "2+ years of experience minimum with backup programs like rsync"
No joke, this is what is read. What the fuck is the point of a degree when most of the stuff you're required to learn has nothing to do with a degree?

Stop pirating intellectual property and actually fork over money to acquire it. Study shows that if you pay for something, you are more likely to use it. I have hundreds if not thousands of e-books back in the days, but I never read any of them. These days, if I buy a book or borrow a physical copy from my local library, then I am more likely to take the time to read it.

All I've got is that life's full of tradeoffs and I chose to abandon my idealism for practicality.
Don't hoarde pdfs, it's never useful.

>Then were you ever really retarded?
I was officially diagnosed by 2 professionals with ADHD and 1 professional with Aspergers. My official diagnosis was ADHD with possible Aspergers. You nigger.

Genetic determinism is the opiate of the dumbasses. You keep telling yourself that the reason you haven't accomplished anything is because "muh genetics determine muh actions" which is a fucking lie. Sure your genetics do give you higher tendancies towards one behaviour or another, but they dont DETERMINE who or what you are, only you can do that.
So stop being a fucking nigger, get the fuck off this board right this fucking isntant, and do something useful with your life nigger.

Fuck y'all, peace out!

>Stims make me smell like shit
What

Do you know why employees at Apple have to pay for their cafeteria food? It's because Steve Jobs once said that if employees get something for free, then they won't enjoy it. If you pay for something, then you are more likely to find satisfaction and enjoy it that much more given you invested into it. So don't pirate intellectual property.

these fuckers are in control of the study publishing bussiness, no wonder their studies find that you need to fork money over to the publishing racket to enjoy reading. I hoard lots of pdfs and read a lot of them also. Be smart and don't waste your time or money. Having physical copies of books is great also.

or Steve was just stingy.
The problem with hoarding/pirating isn't that you get shit for free, it's that the process of hoarding becomes a thrill in itself and you start spending an inordinate amount of time on it and replaces, for example the act of reading the shit you download. If you avoid this pitfall and stay focused on your goals, there's nothing wrong with hoarding.