What would the American version of yourself be like?

What would the American version of yourself be like?

Straight, high test, into cars.

individualistic, insecure, autistic and fat

Fat, loud, statist

Wait..

fat and insecure with shit in my underwear

Same as here except there I could buy a gun to kill myself

I would grow corn in a farm in Minessota and play de banjo

Just like me instead I have the ability to talk to random strangers at length.

Fat

mah niggro i`m gonna bitch you ass ooga booga hhuh

This so much

Probably a school shooter

Exactly like me except I'd fit in better because I look like a typical American, I'd have nerd loser friends which you can find in America easily, I'd shoot guns in the desert for fun, and live a happy life with a fat American gf.

Texan

Exactly the same except he could eat Herseys without retching

fat and retarded

The same but with a bullet in my brain

CHICANO or celtic

You're Israeli, I'm sure there are 100 different ways to kill yourself within the day.

The same but with butter in my ass.

I know like one person who plays the banjo, and he's a complete redneck.

You'd fit in.

will be kicking five of the lowest ranked members of my clan tonight, friends.

gonna have the rest of my platoon round them up execution style for the show.

will send a message to the new recruits about what kind of shit they got themselves into by joining.

are you not entertained?

t. First Lieutenant

??????? Nothing would change.

I imagine a Latino who is just a little bit gay

Depressed by how wide and diverse the country is. Not comfy.

I can't think of any difference

I'd have antennas and bigger moustache

Jeffrey Dahmer but weeber.

fat and with IBS

Same thing lol

Attractive, heterosexual, fit, individualistic and prideful of plethora of accomplishments.

>lives in a Southern state
>long hair, skinny
>walks around in loose jeans and without shirt during summers
>lives in a shack or a trailer
>does some basic bitch jobs
>owns some 70s polluting gas guzzler
>blues and rock'n-roll in veins that incorporate together into authentic Blues-y Grimy Sludge'n'Roll

Fuck, now I want to become a redneck in some small village.

I know several people like that.
Welcome to the South, tbqh.

Just like me except stupid enough to overstay my visa

Shot to death.

I'd probably still be studying engineering, because dropping out has more severe economic consequences in the US.
And I'd probably own a car or a motorcycle. All the money I've invested in getting my licenses here could have bought me a license and a shitbox in the US.

I'd probably still be an insecure asshole. But I could go for melancholic drives instead of melancholic walks.
And I would also own a Chiappa Rhino and I'd go to the local shooting range every second weekend. Maybe I'd be a bit fatter, too.