/heem/: jaundice edition

UPCOMING EVENTS (May):
5/25: TUF Season 23 EP 7 (?)
(((starts at the same time all the other ones have)))
5/26: EFN 48: Moscow
5/27: ONE FC: Kingdom of Champions (Amnuaysirichoke vs Naito)
5/29: UFC FN 88 (Almeida vs Garbrandt)

UPCOMING EVENTS (June):
6/4: UFC 199 (Bisping vs Rockhold 2)
6/10: Titan FC 39 (Cavalcante vs Healy)
6/12: Pancrase 278 (Sunabe vs Haita)
6/17: ONE FC (TBA)
6/17: Bellator 156 (Galvao vs Dantas)
6/17: EFN Global (Fedor vs Maldonaldo)
6/18: UFC FN 89 (MacDonald vs Thompson)
6/24: Bellator 157 (Jackson vs Ishii)
6/25: GLORY 31 (Vakhitov vs Bouzidi)

UPCOMING EVENTS (July):
7/1: ONE FC (TBA)
7/7: UFC FN 90 (Dos Anjos vs Alvarez)
7/8: UFC TUF 23 Finale (Jedrzejczyk vs Gadelha)
7/9: UFC 200 (DC vs Jones 2)
7/10: UFC Hall of Fame Inductions
7/13: UFC FN 91 (Ferguson vs Chiesa)
7/16: Bellator 158 (Kimbo vs Thompson)
7/23: UFC on Fox 20 (Holm vs Shevchenko)
7/30: UFC 201 (Lawler vs Woodley)

PREVIOUS THREAD: NEWS:

>Belal Muhammad signs with UFC
instagram.com/p/BFxHFQvSCn5/

>BJ Penn out of UFC 199
mmajunkie.com/2016/05/b-j-penn-off-ufc-199-due-to-usada-violation

>James Tuna retires
mmajunkie.com/2016/05/10-fight-ufc-veteran-james-te-huna-announces-mma-retirement-after-13-years-as-pro

>wew lad
mmamania.com/2016/5/24/11760210/report-floyd-mayweather-vs-conor-mcgregor-set-september-announcement-two-weeks-mma

INFORMATION OF NOTE:
bet the barn on bisping to win by heem via liver kick

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/BJ0xBCwkg3E
youtube.com/watch?v=DSZSxyCtF1M
youtube.com/watch?v=qDcFryDXQ7U
youtube.com/watch?v=JmfhQdADOzk
youtube.com/watch?v=Sz-sQfTTCmw
youtube.com/watch?v=0J2QdDbelmY
youtube.com/watch?v=Yo5hgaBWzwM
instagram.com/p/BFxCeOEqBtY/?taken-by=mickeygall
youtube.com/watch?v=IE_5vluaUPU
youtube.com/watch?v=_45YmP8PWek
mmajunkie.com/?p=195449
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

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first for Rockhold dying for our sins

What's the thread theme, lads, I need a song to listen to, right now

>That Luke

Top kek

Blondie - Chin of glass

youtu.be/BJ0xBCwkg3E

youtube.com/watch?v=DSZSxyCtF1M

youtube.com/watch?v=qDcFryDXQ7U

>tfw you could edge out a split decision against every here

youtube.com/watch?v=JmfhQdADOzk

but m8 I'll heem or die trying like pat

we'll see what the judges have to say about that

you're assuming I make it out of the first round.

youtube.com/watch?v=Sz-sQfTTCmw

>implying the fight wont get canceled because of my nonstop injuries

Is a technical decision the rarest finish to a MMA fight ever?
I can only think of one off the top of my head

Bisping had one against Alan Belcher I think

Based Khabib probably heemed them permanently

i'd explode in her ass senpai

her jibbyjabby makes her look like a sexy scifi alien lady

>There is an italian in this thread right now that argues that Almeida doesn't hit hard

Like a Quarian

golovkin's and battlefield's theme: youtube.com/watch?v=0J2QdDbelmY

I dont think she knows that id travel the world just to fuck a select few. I dont think she knows she can make that list.

Also Gertrude Merez makes this thread official.

>seven nation army
u know that song is a satanic call for the end times right?

Good. I just want out of the ride.

IM STARVING

we aint had nothing but trash events for 2 stinkin weeks!

MMA is changing. She's an MMA fighter like this one. She trains out of Dagestan. Where Khabib is from. I see movement, and I feel stiffness.

yeh

why cant we have some heems?

youtube.com/watch?v=Yo5hgaBWzwM

instagram.com/p/BFxCeOEqBtY/?taken-by=mickeygall

>Some more light sparring w @ljreboli. Gonna be more active on social media. Let me know what you guys wanna see. Love hearing from ya. Btw I hear I'm fighting Punk late summer. No official date yet I'll let u know when I know

Then end. Go do whatever you want till you get killed.

>all these pussies too scared to go out like a man

If im going to commit suicide om fucking bitches and killing niggas and only a nuke can stop me.

>trash events for 2 stinkin weeks!

with the olympics on the horizon!

...

Sup Forums will be overrun by memes.

His movement is evolving, in his last fight he looked quite a bit unorthodox, he looks way more flowy now
Phil Brooks on suicide watch

when are the olympics btw? they are this year right?

Did he got heemed?
He went stiff

My goal is to make enough money to travel to any country, pick a virgin within 4 years in age and take her home.

How much would that take and which countries should i go to?

>it's a Gertrude Merez gerturding all over heem episode

Shutup Gertrudis, you know youre a fan.

got the wind knocked out of him possibly

yeah, he was out for awhile. KOs in judo happen every now and then mainly from bouncing the back of your head from tripping throws.


Of course choke outs happen, but actual KOs from throws are rather rare but not unheard of.

...

What is your bare minimum limit? Of age I mean.

youtube.com/watch?v=IE_5vluaUPU


can't find a short youtube of the first .

I can imagine, it happens in wrestling too.

what about from judo chops?

...

With me being 18 i think 16 should be the lowest i got. And it remains at two year gaps till im 22, the gap is then 4 years. No more than 1 year older since women age horribly

yep which is why they have rules against certain high arc throws in folk style and why greco specializes in them, these bans are why folk style forces people to specialize in singles and doubles in the meta and why greco focuses on high arc throws in their meta


KO from a suplex here.

>I see movement, and I feel stiffness.
no one else cares but I thought it was funny

I hope Cormier heems Jones with a single leg throw

he might have already if bones hadn't grabbed the fence and regained his balance

i care, i didn't notice that. don't let self-deprecating humor become real self-deprecation

>770
chabad checked

Kek, I was just joking, but I do not agree with you. The fact that someone's life is shit doesn't mean he gets the right to end somebody else. People who go like this are the real pussies in my opinion.

Will MM take Reis into the matrix?

mayn boychik

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No date announced? Aren't they on 200? Don't tell me punk got injured again.

He'll heem him by rolling around and then backstabbing him like Dark Souls.

Go plagiarize a youtube video you goof

Punk's been on suicide watch since joining ufc
Heck even the reporter guy Gall dismantled would probably murder him

youtube.com/watch?v=_45YmP8PWek

kek

Garbrandt has beaten less people than Almeida has kek

That's why he is saying that.

ONE MEME IS DEAD, ONE TO GO

there is one with the syrian hw who got kicked low and used it as an excuse cause he was so gassed

here hoping we can get another heem bouncy webm

Precision beats power and timing beats speed. Luke will be exposed just like Stephanie.
>Tim Boetsch
Kek
>Costa Who
>injured Bisping
>old Macheater
>"I walk around at 190 lbs now" post USADA Weidman
Luke is chump change. Mike is the real deal.

bisping has no hope though, cavs would have ended gsw if okc doesn't anyway

He HAS been doing that crawling thing in front of his opponents

I feel kind of bad for Dillasnake desu lads

why?

he's a roiding, cheating, deceitful, humorless manlet.

I dunno, I guess I felt kind of bad for him at that press conference when he lost the Cruz

Still a lot happier cruz memed on him though, I love watching Cruz fight

he was losing his mind over social media too, all that passive aggressiveness, still can't hate the guy

What would a fight between him and Conor have looked like?

A lot of humping

how is this attractive

not kidding

>tfw want bisbong to win the title

Conor via KO in the first.

jon

Garbrandt may be a douche but I appreciate that he tries really hard to heem people.

what did he mean by this?

>Alottuh pressho, using my muay thai, my boxy, my wrassling, having a good conditioning, just everything, man.

I've seen better.

>tfw i can heem every here

I think he's actually just really dumb and not a bad dude.

...

Conor wouldn't be careful, then during the post fight interview a papakha would fall on Rogan's head and AKA would storm the cage to face off against RDA and his corner

>What, Da--

Kek

this

Conor via leff han shot

post fighters who would have had GOAT careers if not wrongly imprisoned by a corrupt legal system, i'll start

no hes just acts like a child with anger problems

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...

RYAN HALL HAS A FIGHT

RYAN HALL HAS A FIGHT

HE IS BACK

mmajunkie.com/?p=195449

ALEX WHITE AKA ARTEM LOBOV MASSACERER 2.0

YOURE NEXT