/bundes/cric/

dead poomunities edition

Australia, West Indies, South Africa ODI tri-series begins June 3

Other urls found in this thread:

espncricinfo.com/australia/content/match/fixtures.html?team_country=2;future=1
reddit.com/r/Cricket/comments/4ltta4/i_literally_confronted_dale_steyn_outside_of_his/
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

Is Ben Cutting going to be a future successful odi/t20 all-rounder for Australia?

gooooooooooooood morning

>tfw I have literally confronted Dale Steyn outside of his hotel in Sydney and showed up to fight him after he called me weak on Twitter and he bitched out of the fight

Still a good bowler though

Cricket is gay

Whens the next test series for Australia? Google didn't show it like a month ago when I last looked

I dont think you can beat him 1v1 if you both are alone in a underground street fight
Bowlers really have strong arms, he can knock you up in a punch

espncricinfo.com/australia/content/match/fixtures.html?team_country=2;future=1

*Out

based fucking goosey

He was a big thing in Shield a few years back, but got injured and now he's poo

>losing to literal who's in the warmup matches
>not playing Russell and Gayle
>getting surpassed by Bangladesh in the ODI rankings

should the Tendies just give up?

Strong but vulnerable. Fast bowling takes a tremendous toll on the body, all cricket does. When I was playing club cricket I'd get a stress fracture once a season from over-exerting and being slack with my strengthening exercises. Part of the reason why I gave up, also I was shit.

Even though I outgrew my anger toward him I'd have the better chance of putting him in the ground

he's raised on the mean streets of Phalaborwa and Pretoria lad, he'd tear you apart

Based krazyGOD, king of Sydney Grade Cricket.

Phalaborwa was a predominately white, low population, low crime area when he was growing up. Again I don't doubt he isn't a strong person, he's just nowhere near as physically intimidating as he is made out to be

>also I was shit

Krazykuck would never admit to being crap at cricket.

Also he's probably still stuck in the office KEK

>he's just nowhere near as physically intimidating as he is made out to be

KEK, making angry faces is now considered intimidating? Kek. Maybe if you're a 12 year old Indian kid. Kek. He's a lean greyhound like bitch and I could literally rip his Boer heart out with my bare hands and eat it if I wanted to.

Nah he's back, check the end of the last thread. Just sifted through the day's postings and replied to several all at once, with not a single word of substance.

That was me, not krazykuck

I really rate Kane Williamson. He's not going to "dominate" bowling attacks in the traditional sense (i.e. score hundred of 130 balls in a test), but I think he's technically the best of any batsmen playing the game. With a good technique you're likely to be more consistent. However, as Kohli has shown, a mixture of good technique and sheer determination is also good enough to achieve a super high level of consistency. Root also deserves a mention - I think these three will ensure we get something similar to the to the Tendulkar, Kallis and Ponting era. Quite honestly, it's also not about the amount of runs you score (just bear with me), but when you score them. A prime example is Warner last night and in the qualifier - even though Kohli has been amassing them, Warner played crucial knocks when it mattered. So what would really serve for me as the benchmark to day which of these new batsmen is going to be better, is the amount of high pressure games they win, but I think Williamson is potentially that player. Cool question btw - think it's a nice debate to have :)

>this triggers the krazykuck

LE MARSH AND LE BIRD LE EXPOSED KANE AS LE FLAT LE TRACK LE BABBY LE GOATVEN GODTH LE SCORED LE RUNS WHEN LE GANE DIDNT LE X LE D

It sounds like it triggered you more than him lad.

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If Dale Steyn was under threat from a gorilla at a zoo, would you kill it?

B T F O
T
F
O

Cook on suicide watch

fuck you man, I'm still seething over that

>LE FUG LE PARENTS LE KID SHOULD HAVE BEEN SHOT INSTEAD XD XD

are you related to that gorilla?

test

cricket

I've actually put a lot of thought into how I'd handle Dale. Obviously his right hook would be dangerous, but he'd put his whole weight behind that, leaving him vulnerable to a counter-attack if avoided. What I'd need to do is feint to the left to bait the punch out and then quickly dodge to the left. At that point I would strike at him from behind or attempt to trip him up and get enough strikes in during the confusion to beat him into submission.

natural selection

If you are useless enough to neglect your child and let him fall into the lair of an endangered animal, YOU deserve to bear the brunt of the consequences.

Keep white-knighting that useless mother to be edgy though, you useless contrarian fatass.

BTFO

Given how /cric/ thinks his South African has prepared him for such encounters let alone facing me, I'll leave it up to nature to decide

OH SHIT

Based fucking statsGOD

STATSBRO BRINGING THE HEAT

Don't get me wrong, Dale would have the resilience to keep on fighting, but he'd have give up out of fear of sustaining an injury that would affect his cricket playing career. I think that's my main advantage over him.

Holy shit based statsbro, how are you so based?

Kek blown the fuck out

Statsbro on nobel prize watch

>We didn't get to see footage of the killshot

Land of the free indeed

No fucking chill

S T A T S G O D
T
A
T
S
G
O
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There he is. There he goes again
Look everyone, statscunt posted it once again. Isn't he just the funniest guy around. Oh my god.

I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room giggling like a little girl as you once again type your little /cric/ meme up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don’t even fill in the captcha, maybe you’re such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a Sup Forums pass so you just choose the picture. Oh we all know the picture, the uh will smith isn’t it? I imagine you, little shit, laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your KFC onto the floor. But its ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh that’s right, did I fail to mention? You live with your mother! You’re a fat fucking fuck up and she’s probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all god damn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on Sup Forums posting about a pakipaddle sport. Just imagine this, she had you and then she thought you were going to be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand and then you became a NEET. A pathetic /cric/ fag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can’t even talk try to you because all you say is “STATSGOD STATSGOD STATSGOD”.

You became a parody of your own self, statscunt. And that’s all you are. A sad little thread laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he’s done a million times now.

And that’s all you’ll ever be.

You are obviously so infuriated that you're forcing yourself to take a break from this argument, possibly the thread altogether, to cool off. This is a good idea, but here are a few points you should be made aware of before you go:
1. You are new. I was literally here for years before /cric/ even existed. While this may not be necessarily a great thing, you seem to take great offence when people call you new, so it would also offend you to realize that the person you're arguing with has been here much longer than you.
2. My cricket knowledge dwarfs yours. That's not to say I know everything, just that you know FAR less than you try to claim. The moniker "statsautist" was a poor choice in retrospect, because it's you're neither knowledgeable about cricket stats nor autistic when it comes to cricket knowledge. The label seems to have gone to your head.
3. Your mannerisms and characteristics are very easy to predict. When making a claim or trying to begin an argument with someone, you will start relatively calmly. A lot of the time, the opponent will not bother arguing with you, or will not care, and you will win the argument without ever having to display anything but a calm and collected demeanour. However, as soon as someone challenges your opinion, or takes you up on your debate and it becomes apparent to you that you'll soon become exposed, you get EXTREMELY angry, and begin spouting memes left, right and center. I honestly don't think you're even aware that you do this. It's just a defence mechanism that you employ to fool yourself into thinking you're posting your argument in a witty Sup Forums-related way, rather than in abject fury.New Zealand posters have never brought anything of value to /cric/ and you are a prime example of this. Perhaps if Australians weren't so prominent in /cric/ you might be able to become a useful poster, but with us here you can't help but let your inferiority complex take over and turn you into a clueless, seething casual.

based statschrist

holy fuck statsnapoleon, I don't think anyone can recover from this

based goosey

Wrong - the gorilla does for being the inferior species. Not so tough caged up with a gun in your face are you, simian cunt?

POO
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F

t. Glenn McGrath

I can't stay away for too long

hi

Fuck off

>Mitchell's

goosey, you here m8?

>Sri Lanka fast bowler Shaminda Eranga has been reported for a suspect action following the second Test against England in Chester-le-Street.

>Eranga must have his action tested at an ICC accredited centre within 14 days - Loughborough University in England is his closest option - but can continue bowling until the result of that test is known.

>The Chester-le-Street Test was umpired by Aleem Dar and S Ravi, with Andy Pycroft as match referee. This is the first time Eranga's action has been called into question - in his 18th Test. If it is found to be illegal, he will be barred from bowling in international cricket until he remodels his action and has it cleared at an ICC accredited centre.

kek

KEK

K-E-K

Mkhitaryan apparently rejected an offer to extend his BVB contract

Comfy thread tobihannes. Maybe the is the solution for the ec cancer.

poo peelanders are nicer than australians

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I am a meme-tier "batsman" but I am literally going to Lee to Chanderpaul of Cucktorians this coming summer

are you reading the same thread I am?

Shareholders on suicide watch

Shareholders on smart investment watch

can some germanon explain why koln just sold their two good young midfielders?

are they rumoured to buy someone better? are they in financial strife

worried about the future of >us

>1GOTS

Ben Cutting is an extremely unlucky player.

He is a very good First-Class bowler but doesn't have the technique to be a Test match allrounder.

He is also a handy T20 slogger but is a useless T20 bowler because he doesn't really have a yorker or good slow ball variations.

if you could combine his quality as a bowler in First-Class with his quality as a batsman in T20 he'd be a fucking elite allrounder. But instead he will be cucked his entire career. He was on the verge of having a career as a specialist Test fast bowler in 2011/12 but injury took his pace and he never recovered.

>can some germanon explain why koln just sold their two good young midfielders?
money
>are they rumoured to buy someone better?
maybe Salif Sané

Is that a girl he's standing next to?

please stop bullying 5'5niel

I just didn't realise there were pictures of him in the company of females

We don't need them and schmadtke and friends probably feel confident enough to keep making good transfers. No need to be worried tobihannes.

Did you miss that text message conversation he posted between him and a girl on christmas eve? Comedy gold tbqh

You may only reply to this post if YOU have PERSONALLY created or pioneered a quality /cric/ meme this year

Are you tall (6'4"+) ?

From experience it was the really tall guys who had big problems with stress fractures

you r le daniel XDDDDDDDDDDDDD

6'2", but I get stress fractures in my shins because I've got bad feet and my left leg is slightly shorter than my right

I created the "just did a big poo in a fancy restaurant lads" meme and pioneered the "I got an email from woolworths today" meme

Puh slept like shit

Aussie girls only date 6'8" and 300 lbs Polynesians

Same, uncomfortable feeling in my head all morning.

I only date german international students and backpackers

Slots taken. Get out.

I for one am welcoming our brown overlords

>because I've got bad feet

Exactly my problem. I would fall over alot and eventually my luck ran out and I did my meniscus in one knee. That injury wasn't bad at all, very minor keyhole op and 6 weeks rehab. The problem was that because of the op I lost alot of muscle in that leg and I started to overload my good leg. Then I got achilles tendinopathy which created like two years of problems because it would just never completely fuck off and then as I started training/playing again it would comeback. I finally got rid of it but it took a whole season out for me.

india v england next decent series at the end of the year

someone add this to the Indian montage

There have been no quality 2016 /cric/ memes. All are leftovers from 2015.

>indiawinslol
>not the single greatest contest in world sport: Australia vs South Africa

...

>Christmas Eve

Of course I missed it. Better question is why YOU didn't, you nerd.

That's not New Zealand vs Bangladesh.

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reddit.com/r/Cricket/comments/4ltta4/i_literally_confronted_dale_steyn_outside_of_his/

BASED STATSCUNT

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>gentleman's sport

>all those seething redditors

>I love /r/cricket. Even the shitposts are amazing.

What did he mean by this?

ty

>the beautiful game™

>M-MODS!!!!

lel

>wheelchair cricket player

Every time...