/cric/

England v Sri Lanka Test III: Lords

Day 1

England lead 2-0, which obviously means they will lose this one.

No other cricket of note is being played right now.

Other urls found in this thread:

reddit.com/r/Cricket/comments/4n8m67/does_anyone_actually_rate_mitch_marsh/
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laws_of_cricket
strawpoll.me/10375830/
twitter.com/SFWRedditVideos

Damn that's not the webm I thought it was

cricket is gay

the fuck are you watching that garbage series for?
its more one sided than AUSvWI and your country isnt even involved

Again, I think the big slab of evidence against this theory is the fact that this neo-statscunt CLEARLY still knows a lot about cricket. Neither AMS nor neo-AMS knew anything.

BUT, we haven't seen shitspouter around with his old name for a while now, he could have assimilated another poosonality, true.

He's a friendless loser who thinks watching English boreblock is his intellectual gateway to more refined tastes.

He's Daniel without the massive ego.

>without the massive ego
>without

>He's Daniel without the massive ego.

You mean

>He's Daniel

Can someone from /cric/ explain the MUH AGGRESSION/lol LOSE2WIN tactics that Kikeal Cuck used to play with when he captained?

I mean, yeah it's a good ball but this isn't impressive at all because LITERALLY some of us shitposters on a chinese imageboard are probably better at batting than Nuwan fucking Pradeep.

All you have to do is not be a coward against a 130 kp/h bowler and just stay fucking inline and you have a better chance than that guy

If it was Mitchell Johnson or Morne Morkel I might understand, but its fucking James Anderson

This guy clearly has zero self-esteem, which is why he's more invested in my pseudo-gimmick than I am.

This is different from Pussyiel Gay, who was hellbent on establishing his gimmick(really just his boring life) as the pre-eminent /cric/ persona.

You get the feeling that this guy would be open to swallow his non-existent pride and engage in social activities, unlike Cuckiel who'd do absolute fuck-all to endear himself to his peers and then whine about them not inviting him anywhere.

Reminder to join the faces of /cric/ to show support to our American friend.

?

I just wanted to post it because it's such a #11 meme dismissal, which don't happen that much anymore because everyone in the tail can now memeslog 20 odd

I mean look at that fucking bat position he's missed it by 3 inches at least

It's the delusional idea that if you memeswing and/or pack the field with more catchers when the game isn't going your way you can some how flip the game in a very short time. Which is true, on the few times that it works.

Why don't you put up your selfie with Stoinis then cunt

posting in a Daniel thread

What's your endgame Statscunt II?

Daniel loves Cook more than life itself

Captaincy in boreblock is a literal meme. A captain has next to no effect on his team's performance in boreblock.

T20s and ODIs are infinitely more demanding for a captain, given the limited opportunities in the format to maximize impact. Hence why Dhoni was the GOAT

Hi Daniel, you're already on the faces of /cric/. I wasn't talking to you friend :)

No this is Daniel. The difference is that he is now steadfastly refusing to acknowledge that it is him. I can only assume that he is doing this because he doesn't want more discussion about his personal life. While that is understandable, this charade he has going on is both needless and laughable

ams is so devoted to the act of poosonality theft that he LITERALLY spent the last four months studying every Wisden in GREAT detail just to assume the mantle of statscunt

This is surreal

>Dhoni was the GOAT

I'm sure of it, this is part of Shitspouter's "endgame". He's taken the /rug/ war and brought it to /cric/

Shut the FUCK up Ankush. Kill yourself. Right fucking now.

You.

It's pathetic that you spend all this time here and still can't identify a statschrist post.

haha you frist Daniel :)

You may be right. See Daniel was historically incapable of giving Kohli or Dhoni any credit.

I would have said that it's statsy but Daniel hates me the most over here, hence the over the top aggression.

Anyone still doubt me that this is AMS after this miserable excuse of a ""post"" ?

neo-AMS actually watches /cric/ though. it was original AMS who didnt know shit about /grig/

Official unironic poosonality rankings 2016

>Trump Hat Guy
>Trinibro
>Jynn (unironically)
>Pakime
>Statscunt Mark I
>Daniel Mark II
>Gatecunt
>Daniel Mark I
>Krazykrejza
>Shitspouter
>Statscunt Mark II
>Ankush

reddit.com/r/Cricket/comments/4n8m67/does_anyone_actually_rate_mitch_marsh/

this triggers the gatecunt

Also go fuck yourself daniel

>using le ebin /grig/ maymay

Worst to best?

Also, >pakime

This is just two people talking to each other. Cricket < baseball

PLEASE

Anyone that doesn't rate marsh should neck themselves

Reminder Waugh had the same comments levelled at him when he started too

I never said Dhoni was shit, just the fact that (You), of all people, calling him "GOAT" is so ridiculous. I'm admiring this new shit AMS, it's truly the next level of your endgame.

WATCH

Hi, newcomer to /cric/! It seems you have stumbled upon our nifty old sport.

You're probably wondering: what the hell are these guys in whites doing? Why are they playing with a paddle? Is this a new meme? But did you know that cricket has been played for over 200 years? Wow! That's really something.

Here's something that might help you understand the game more:en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Laws_of_cricket

And while you're here, it's best if we introduce you to some of /cric/'s finest memes so you don't feel left out :)

Here are a few of the classics:

>Is David Warner related to Shane Warner?

Referring to 2 famous Australian cricketers, this is a humorous play on words of current Australian batsman David Warner and Australian spin legend Shane Warne(spin is a form of bowling that you'll come to know and love). The similar personalities of the two players also makes this amusing, as it's likely that they are probably related!

>Will Smith score a century?Another delightful play on words. Here we're referring to current Australian captain Steven Smith, and the question is whether he'll score a century. However, this question is always answered with "Will Smith is an actor m8", a reference to popular African-American actor Will Smith, someone I'm sure you're familiar with!

>Daniel

Daniel is a cricket fan from New Zealand well known for his idiosyncrasies, such as his worship of progressive rock, the English County Championship and infatuation with average Slavic girls(surely a step down from the babes you have in Europe or America, haha). It is common to reply to New Zealander posts with "hi daniel", as a reference to /cric/'s most popular Kiwi.

>Holly or Ellyse?

This is an ongoing debate as to who is the better looking female cricketer: Australia's Holly Ferling and Ellyse Perry(who represents Australia in both cricket and soccer - wow!)

There's so much more in /cric/ to offer! Stick around!

OUR

>-2 votes

KEK

Daniel on suicide watch

>some redditor made the comment as me

Just so you know, I posted this before reading

How the FUCK is it even possible to fuck up a pasta?

LITERALLY kill yourself

how's unemployment gatecocksucker?

Marsh is a hack. Averages just 22 and has an econ rate of nearly 9. Corey Anderson is way better than him. As is Mitchell GOATner.

>b-b-but le boreblock average!!!

Kek.

hello faggots, england win toss and cook batting legend to make 100 by close off 300 balls. bring on the marathon. can't wait boys

Reminder statsjesus pioneered this pasta.

Careful lad you're gonna start driving it into the ground. It's funny at the moment but it'll get old fast.

What's your opinion on Kane Williamson's current form?

Please save us from this autism person not from australia or new zealand

>awake at 5:20am

tradie detected

installing any gyprock for Mr Woakes lad?

Mediocre atm. He started off the year brilliantly but he always bottles it in the IPL.

Still light years ahead of Meme Shit though.

reminder anyone that doesn't rate the Marsh brothers is a seething fucking casual

If you were the real statscunt, you'd know I'm at university

haha whoops I missed that part, I've corrected it now my Pakistani friend :)

Statsgod on eternal /cric/ GOAT watch

>Even using statscunts buzzwords like "Meme shit"

You deserve credit for your commitment to your art, AMS

You literally have zero evidence to refute Dhoni being the GOAT captain.

He won a World Cup with absolute shitters in his bowling attack. Had he not done it, we wouldn't have the IPL, and cricket would be languishing in the same threshold of relevance as fucking badminton.

Jesus the state of that reddit thread
>h-h-he doesn't move the ball!
He was LITERALLY shitting swing ALL GAME in PP
>h-h-he's just like Watson!
Except he can bowl for more than two overs before his body explodes
>h-h-he's not a good enough bowler!
He's LITERALLY better than any shield bowler right now

>le fulltime student

Neck yourself. There is zero reason to being unemployed as a student. I used to work 25 hours a week while studying 5 papers, while still managing my own startup, gf and a social life.

I am employed, ams

I saw one thread saying Joe Burns could be Australia's next great batsman KEK

Both Marsh brothers suck fucking hard

Good Australia XI

>Warne
>Burns
>Khawaja
>Meme Shit
>Stadpadges
>Nevill
>Starc
>Pattinjured
>Cummins
>Hazlebad
>Lyon

You can't debate this. And if you want to pull the "b-but Pattinson and Cummins will never play" yamyam then fucking pick one of SOK, Bird, Boland, or even a "Big Unit" like NCN, The Duke™ or fucking Memeswell

Better team right fucking there.

>while still managing my own startup, gf and a social life.
THIS IS AMS. CONFIRMED.

Pretty much every single one of his "poosonalities" in /rug/ involved him making up bullshit for his life, like the fucking donut factory job and his law degree and his chemical engineering gf. It's the exact same style.

And bravo, I must say. This is a solid development.

You fucking suck at this

>Warner
>Finch
>Khawaja
>WatGOD
>Memeswell
>Marsh
>Nevill
>Faulkner
>Zampa
>Starc
>Coulter-Nile

Can Warner even read?

Watson's retired m8

Half of those don't play tests

>"fucking" randomly inserted in sentences

daniel

David "Davo" Warner is fluent in seven languages, including Latin, Old English and Gaelic

>not using capitals for someone's name

Shitspouter.

>all this "poosonality" discussion
: )

Shut the FUCK UP Ankush. NO ONE asked for your opinion on this.

Based neo-statsy

the look in her eye, you just KNOW they banged

Gurinder is known to be THE most hung guy in Australian cricket, possibly one of the biggest in the world. his cock has been described as "like an evian bottle", with gargantual thickness that would rival shane diesel and shorty mac. im estimating his size to be at least 8.5" bone pressed, with OVER 7" of girth. he would have absolutely destroyed Holly’s pussy.

they would have spent hours and hours on foreplay, getting herself wet enough just so she can take it. i can just imagine her begging for it, with Sandhu barely able to force it past the knob, and Holly moaning and squirming, demanding him to force it in deeper. she would have orgasm'd within seconds of taking the entire length, being filled and stretched right up to her cervix.. the orgasm would have been powerful, with her vaginal muscles clamping down on Gurinders throbbing monstrosity, her whole body quivering in euphoria..

i bet she still masturbates to the memory of it

Reminder that I literally run /cric/

>66 posts
>10 posters
>the state of /cric/

That reminds me

We still haven't picked our fast bowlers. Top 3 get in

strawpoll.me/10375830/

We should do a womyn's team next

walkcunt

someone please post the Warner IQ pasta

just woke up lads

Thanks for the 11th unique IP, /nrl/

its my birthday lads

David Warner is the smartest international Cricket player in either tests or limited overs. Not only that, but David Warner is more intelligent than both Barack Obama and Thomas Edison. Do you think I'm joking? I'm not.

Warner scored a 42/50 on the Wonderlic intelligence test. A score of 20 is consistent with average intelligence. To convert a Woderlic score to IQ, double the value and add 60. This means Warner has an IQ of 144.
To add some context, this means David Warner has a higher IQ than the following individuals:
Thomas Edison
Abraham Lincoln
Thomas Jefferson
Barack Obama
Bill Clinton
Adolf Hitler

Here are the Wonderlic scores for other relevant Cricket stars:
Alastair Cook - 35
Kane Williamson - 33
Stuart Broad - 28
Virat Kohli - 28
Steve Smith - 27
Marlon Samuels - 6

shut the fuck up you autistic faggots

>12th unique IP

based /nrl/, thankyou for saving our dying poomunity with YOUR unique IP

Current /cric/ official attractive men XI

>Cook
>
>
>Root
>
>Nevill
>Woakes
>Broad
>Finn
>either Wood or Cummins (tbd)
>Zampa

Need to discuss
>who is the other opener
>who are the other two top/middle order batsmen
>are there ANY other keepers or is Nevill the best there is

Criteria: must have played international cricket within the last 18 months or so

SHUT UP!!!!

>Ellyse marries a coconut
>Holly fucks a paki

you know that eliminates them from being the queen of /cric/

Thanks again, /nrl/

I will LITERALLY end all of you

Kohli at 3

THIRTEENTH unique IP

>>Ellyse marries a coconut
This man is WHITE

14th IP
/cric/ on sustainable community watch

I don't know enough about womyn but let's start on the female one. Can include all from the BBL because most of the international chicks are av as fuck

>
>
>
>Ellyse
>Du Preez (c)
>
>
>
>
>Holly
>Cheatle

Gonna have to put it to vote, I don't really feel Kohli's that attractive tttt

/N R L/
N
R
L
/

I despise every ""person"" in this thread

>>Du Preez (c)

literally fuck off daniel, she looks like a pig

the only other semi-decent looking one I have seen is Schutt

He looks like a normal person from Delhi tbẖ, the XI just needed someone though.

A literal bunch of animals

fuck off Wankush, Kohli is a brown manlet, he isnt even in the discussion. You literally only mentioned him so you can feel better about yourself

my handsome XI is

Cock (c)
Hales
Faf
Compton
Kohli
Buttler (wk)
Afridi
Woakes
Wood (most handsome)
Cummings
Finn

Boipussy XI

Root (c)
De Cuck (wk)
Zampa
Bread
Amir
Rabada
Bhuvneshwar Kumar
?
?
?
?

Let's not do this again man

Hello /cric/!!

: D

>screenshotting every reply you get

fucking pathetic daniel, why don't you make this your cover photo again

>(You)

I think I remember that thread, was it those two spergs posting shit like that for an hour?

That was the third most autistic thing I have seen on Sup Forums, after that guy who stalked the British tripfag and daniels 2022 South Africa write-up, respectively