ITT we function in an organized fashion

ITT we function in an organized fashion.

When the thread dies so does whatever we've built for ourselves.

First to roll dubs is in charge.

Rolling for leader Sup Forums

Rolling

i vote for no leader, collectivist anarchy all the way

I would like to nominate myself with these dubs

>Time to start an empire.

reroll

what do we do?

yay. first order of business, fuck the system

after fucking the system a little bit time to build a base

What do we gotta do first baws?

Fuck the system yo!

System has been fucked but Ted in accounting says there's a problem with the paychecks for the builders.

>system claims that fucking was rape
>hr report has been filed
>how do you proceed?

Collectivist anarchy doesn't even define such an abstract and intangible concept as "money", silly

Hank from construction here. I'm told the builders will work gratis for a month since we're all in cahoots anyway. They expect a pension when this is all over, though.

we don't, never happened, as this organization doesn't use money

food? we grown our own
weapons? we build our owns
bitches? we breed our own

>System has been fired due to making false claims
>HR is now busy rehiring someone for system position
>Base builders still haven't gotten their paychecks.

again, learn to read and follow posts that actually make sense for an anarchist organization

We waz kings and shiet

Collectivist anarchy be like

Damnit, Hank!

>Reporting Ted to HR for filing wrongful problem-claims

Reports from section management and the agriculture division. We've got plenty of spare lots to take care of food and enough housing for anyone in the organization. Plenty of water barrels and some water towers here and there seem to be doing the job.

...

Nah, Ted is fine. They were late reports since they had to do some agreeing among themselves.
- Hank

Frank from IT wants to know why the server room is still under construction

Yeah about that water...

>Ted got angry over being reported to HR
>Proceeded to piss and vomit in the water supply
>Blaming his divorce on Hank.

You retards are negating the very first rule we established, fuck this thread

Builders? Money? HR bureaucracy? Fucking hiring people? We're not a fucking fortune 500 company, we make shit happen ourselves

Fuck you OP, no wonder nobody wanted your crappy excuse for roleplaying at /qst/

Fucking the system. Check

Hank! Did you mention to the builders to construct an IT room?

>Reporting Hank to HR for fraudulent building plans.
>Replacing Frank from IT due to problems with Hank's wife.
>Rehiring someone else for Ted's position.

Has anyone hear from Bill down at shipping?

We have a dissident. He goes to the gas chamber with the rest of the jews.

This is anarchy, you don't want it, someone else does, and nothing seems to function. Welcome to a corporate fuckup.

>frank an hero'd when he lost his job
>we have no IT. All semblance of technology is kill.

I think Bill got caught with Hank's wife (who hasn't been though?)

Is the system fucked yet Mr. Krabs?

Hey, don't be yelin' at me fellas. No one told me about the server room until de' last quarter. I've been told the technicians are busy busting their nuts in the loli porn containment room we didn't even have demolished. Thought I put a request in for that years ago.
The engineers are fine but we left them alone for too long and they kinda started a tribe in the extra parking lot we inherited.
- hank the project overseer

>everyone fuckin Hanks wife
>nobodies built anything
>competent professional employees not doing anything
>big boss is missing
yeah I think we're doing a damn fine job fella

This is Hank's wife, Tracy. What's this I hear?

Damnit is there even anyone in charge here?

>Filing report to HR for company funeral for Frank
>Rehiring someone for Frank's position as head of the builders
>Firing Bill for causing indirect harm to personnel
>Slut-shaming Hank's wife through corporate e-mail system
>Filling out forms to form a new IT department.

I should've gone to school.

Tits or gtfo, Tracy

Tracy what the hell ya doin? First ya bangin' Ted and then ya bangin' Bill and then I hear ya bangin' Frank? If you ain't home again tonight I'm filing a dang divorce ya flying fruit basket

This is pretty funny. Nice thread op

Hank, please report to HR for being dead on the job. We can't have that here.

>Reporting engineers to HR for unwanted religious activity on corporate grounds.
>Hiring additional personnel for HR
>Still slut-shaming Tracy

Tracy, please leave this office, you know non-essential personnel and family are not allowed here. Don't make me report you to HR too!

Eat our own dicks

Ok boss

This is Richard Rider from security, we need to take care of the engineer tribe that has infested parking deck C.

>security is requesting a large amount of military grade weaponry from hr

Well if you weren't out drinking and gambling all your money away this wouldn't be an issue, cucky.

Sorry, I was just dropping off Hank's lunch. He left it at home. I'll be gone in a jiffy.

TITS OR GTFO, TRACY

Hank here. It's hard doing construction and project overseer-ing, fella.
Reported to HR, told them the situation in my department, jus' like I'm doin' here. I just found out yesterday that we got a talkin' rat infestation in the river district, but the exterminators are on the case. Fortunately I got the engineers wrangled and they finished the server rooms with the techie's help. Technicians aren't distracted any more because the porn had an expiration date for some reason.
Do we get a website or sumthin' now?
Aw, you're full of soup, lady.

What weapons could the engineers have? No weapons for you. Fight with your fists

Then its time to start the base! I'll start!

Yeah, we seem to have a small problem there Richy.

>We stored those weapons in parking deck C
>HR getting overrun by engineering with requests for medical marijuana
>Tracy has been seen banging Phil from maintenance in the copy room
>Frank's corpse is still mumbling something about his wife
>Bill is going around pissing in all the water

Could you maybe, y'know, disarm the engineers?

I'd like to propose that we go make out with the engineers in a huge orgy

>Disarm the engineers

Ok I'm on it

well glad that's taken care of
I for one petition we build a skyscraper for our official corporate headquarters

Why does it smell like feet in here? Who took their shoes off in the office?

>Reported to HR for unlawful allocation of building materials without a three-fold written consent of Hank the construction manager.

Wait, I thought we drained the river district last week?

>Reporting Manny from sewage to HR

Hey, this is James from Maintenance. Someone has been stealing all the urinal cakes. I think they are eating them too, can you do something about this HR?

Wait, I thought they were breathmints...

He's got my consent now, just filed it with IT (that's what I was told to do) and I think big boss can officiate dat sorta thing.
And yeh we dammed up the river last week so we could power the bowling alley, but apparently that released the talkin' rats. All they want is their own territory for sum reason, but the exterminators aren't havin' it. Last time I called they sez they got the population under control.
- Hank the construction / project overseer guy

>Ordering HR to investigate missing urinal cakes
>Reporting James from Maintenance to HR due to lack of oversight into his own department

Okay engineering disarmament went south. Half the security force joined the engineers as soon as they heard that the engineers had free weed

but big boss is kill

!

Ok, well done Hank.

>Commending Hank to HR for a promotion without a pay-raise.

>IT is up and running
>Parking deck C is being cleaned out
>HR seems to be having a string of suicides

Hey eh, James, could you possibly have a look at the copier? There have been reports of semen being stuck on the buttons due to Stacy and Phil, y'know, doing 'it' in there...

Also, you have to run the department on your own for a while, Phil has been fired.

>Filing report to HR to rehire someone for Phil's position.

what da hell happen to big boss

Hank here. I'm retiring because of the recent divorce
Plus I just discovered a swarm o' talkin' rats in my basement so I need more time to deal with that since the exterminators are busy with the other population
Also I need to go check on my bagpipe collection that I have stored in Italy so I wish you fellas a good luck with the startup

>Frank the IT guy's ghost has been spotted
>the tribal engineers have started worshipping him as a god emporer
>they are assembling ultrasmurf legions as we speak

I say let the engineers have their way!

>Filing complaint to HR about Hank leaving
>Taking a gun to the roof to shoot hank in the knees so he can't ever leave.

Well, eh, good luck I guess Hank...

On a completely unrelated side-note... how is your health insurance?

Good we can use those to kill the engineers

This is Richard Rider from security, my health plan is shit. Apparently it doesn't cover being shot by a company engineer

>the engineers have the space marines tho

Oh you silly bugger, there's no such thing as ghosts. Those stoner engineers probably just accidentally enabled to hologram projector with images of Frank's birthday.

>Filing report to IT to fix the projector
>Filing report to HR to correct IT department's screwup
>Reporting James to HR for failing to meet requirements and deadlines of simple tasks

This is your last warning James! Get it done or I'll report you to HR.

Well, did you wear the company issue bodysuits designed to handle company engineers, or did you screw up on the procedures again?

>Reporting Richard to HR for failure to meet security and company health plan standards.

hr promised us those suits months ago, but they were being designed by the engineers, so progress halted when the engineers went feral

I knew those people couldn't be trusted!

>Reporting HR to HR for failure to meet HR standards.

>the entirety of hr has fired itself for failing to meet hr's standards. we no longer have hr.

>the engineers have the space marines

Ok if we just leave the engineers alone will they oet us live?

>space marines
>let us live

Frank's ghost is vengeful. I'm afraid we're all fucked

>Reporting HR to HR for firing HR over report of HR to HR for failure to meet HR standards of HR integrity.

Which reminds me, has anyone checked the copier yet? The buttons are still sticky.

>reporting hr to hr for failing to comply with hr procedure when filing an hr report for firing hr over a report of hr to hr for failure to meed hr standards

>reporting janitorial services to the nonexistant and incompetent hr for failing to clean the semen off the copier

Has anybody seen Monica? I need to report something to HR.

THE GODDAMN COFFEE IS COLD

Monica has been taken by the engineers

The heating unit on the coffee maker has been taken by the engineers