Why don't you have a girlfriend yet Sup Forums?

Why don't you have a girlfriend yet Sup Forums?

because i have a boyfriend

Because i'm an ugly fuck who only goes outside once every few days and spend my time inside on Sup Forums.

Because I have no self esteem, I'm lazy as fuck, and I just don't care about getting laid

Because I reproduce using airborne spores. Chicks don't dig that shit.

Had one, a few days ago...
Years together...
She just stopped loving me.

I just... this is horrible man.

Why should I? I'm homosexual. Plus girls are annoying.

She's fucking someone else.
Dont trust chicks.

Exactly

Because I have a wife.

Save this friend. It's all your's.

kek

I have a fwb I'm taking to prom.

Because I had a boyfriend and want him back.

because love is a lie that we created

I'm in the process of emotionally manipulating this one fat girl into sex.

Because online gfs don't count

So are homos, what's your point?

my wife won't let me have one

ADDY IN IMAGE!!

Now Playing:

THE DARK CRYSTAL

Probably the apex of Jim Henson's puppet and practical effects work. Hella nostalgia and very creative. This movie does as much to take you to a fantasy world as the Neverending Story, but more frightening.

On another planet in the distant past, a Gelfling embarks on a quest to find the missing shard of a magical crystal, and so restore order to his world.

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ADDY IN IMAGE!!!!

>6.5/10, with proper /fit/ness go to 8.5/10
>26 yo drop off college
>no job
>poor
>no car
>starting to drown in depression

See you guys when i be a hero.

You must be terrible at it then, fat chicks easy as fuck

Right in the feels. Happened to me a month ago, just play some video games user. At least you wont have to worry about her anymore either

Why are you telling people what the dark crystal is about?
We've all watched it.
And if we havn't we're 12 year olds

because I've only lost 56 pounds and I have 270 to go

No, I could fuck her tomorrow. I'm just lazy as fuck.

im lazy, decent looking, 5'2"

Excuses, you cunt.
Fat dudes can fuck chicks if they want.

I wouldn't fuck a fat chick. why would a hot chick fuck a fat dude?

relay now if so I and any girl that I like has not got the message

That's not what OP was asking. I've fucked, I don't have a girlfriend. Big difference.

10 points to ravenclaw

fucken gg mate,hope that guys ok

Because I'm a filthy cripple

he was never ok, he was user ULTRA!

I'm very good looking but it gets negated by my severe IBS, which forces me to stay home basically always. I do everything from home, which means I never meet anyone. And even if I did I wouldn't be able to do much about it. The hardest thing is knowing I can get a good looking woman, but at the same time knowing I can't.

even cripples can make porn, the filthier the better

Because I'm a kissless virgin who is not interested in a relatinship

God speed

Jesus, just cut down on red meat and dairy, then spray away!

Because I am man child , small dick, trap lover .

...

I browse Sup Forums

I do. I asked her around 3 o'clock this morning over skype, and she said yes. Feels good man.

I have had 2 but figure im not even gonna bother again until im like 25-30

First gf i had was when i was really young so it wasnt serious at all.
Second gf lasted me through ages 17-19 before we figured we want different things (she was talking about having babies within the next few years and I was like "Naah")

The girl i'd been hanging with and recently flirting with for the past months also started talking about how she wants to be a mother "before it's too late". So I sexed her and dropped it.

I'm 21 years young, wtf is wrong with women and having kids?

I don't want another one.
>nobody else will compare to her
>every relationship was just drama and bullshit
>sex didn't make up for everything else
Most tense and unhappy years of my life was right out of high school when I started dating.
Never again

>yet
The last gf I had was 11 years ago, when I was in the 10th grade. Since then, I've learned a lot about women and relationships through videos, testimonies and watching other men. Let me say this much: I'm in no rush, and perfectly fine being single. Women care only about themselves, and will royally fuck up a man's life with absolutely no remorse. Fuck that. At the very least, I don't have to listen to some woman bitch and whine about her first world problems non-stop after I've had a rough day/week, only for her to tell me to shut the fuck up if I so much as mention ONE THING that's bothering me...not that she'd care anyway.

Plus, I care more about my hobbies than I do any woman. Sure, a woman can give me sex (when she decides it), but other than that, I see nothing good a man can get from a relationship with a woman. Even the sex depreciates in value and quality after a while, and all you're left with is a gutted bank account and an ex-gf who found someone "more interesting" or whatever excuse she made up, than you. No kids, no wife, no gf, and no extra bullshit. Feels great, OP.

>MGTOW

It's one of their most primal instincts, they can't help it. Relax and have a joint bro.

That's exactly why I never even tried it.

women are on a 'biological clock,' and have to have kids before they reach a certain age (around 30), or those children will come out with all sorts of defects. Men don't have to worry about that.

They expect so much of you, and it never crosses their minds that a relationship is a two way thing and that they should have to put in effort. You can't "fix" that either, there's going to be another more desperate guy with a more loving heart, a thicker wallet and a bigger dick, just ready to treat her like the princess she was told she was.
And then she'll cheat on him for the next guy. And so on.
It's not their fault they're like that, but I sure as hec*k don't want to put myself through that. Let the other poor guys get hurt and think that it's okay because she blows him once a week

Im already stoned, nigger.
Its saturday ;)

Exactly. That's why I'm holding out for android wives.

Lucky fuck. It's midday and I have to wait till tonight to get ripped.

Straightfag here
best relationship I had was with this dude. He was cute and we got along but he said he couldn't be with me because I was straight and he needed love.

The lack of a formal job makes me feel unsecure to look for one.
Also, I feel I am just WAY too much amazing to actually try to get one.

Levels of irony and suppressing my feeling always help me Sup Forumsro

Why resort to fucking an inanimate object though? Why not just occasionally fuck a prosty to get your fix?

Because no confidence...

I've fucked over 2 dozen prostitutes since 2011. Sex doesn't even excite me as much as it used to when I was a teen. At the very least, androids can't get STDs (worst is a computer virus or malware), so I'll never have to wrap up.

Just asked her out today actually

Not him, but wearing condoms is for gays.

Cause I ain't goy no dick. Ladies don't like you when you ain't got no dick.

So how the fuck does fucking an object excite you? Genuinely interested.

Because I seriously don't want one... or a boyfriend for that matter.

Cause I ain't got no dick. Ladies don't like you when you ain't got no dick.

I'm ugly.
I'm fat.
I have no job.
I fail my classes.
I have no friends.
I am broke.
I haven't gone out in months.

Your brain isn't really smart enough to know what's traditionally sexual and what isn't. That's why we have misfires like fetishes, where you are sexually attracted and can fap to non-sexual things, like braces or necks or earlobes or whatever. Some people get the fuck off to nostrils, they have nostril toys and different positions they like.
It's even more understandable when the object is made to look like a hot chick

Jesus Christ that first bitch with the blow horn...

Because I'm ugly and I'm only 5'4".

Because it feels good, and I'll have total control. Lube anything up good enough, and it can get your rocks off.
>book-sex

So while you're fucking this doll, you're thinking about fucking a chick? Just cut out the middleman.

Because apparently most girls, my friends, my family and all my therapists I've had since I was 18 seem to think I'm homosexual.

1) diseases
2) the ones i want to fuck won't fuck me
3) all the trouble that goes along like pretending to be interested in her, the foreplay, the awkward after-sex getting dressed and trying to not tell her that i just want her to leave

no. sex should be like masturbation. it starts and ends when you want it so you can get back to doing things on the internet

It's okay seth. You'll find someone

Id be more worried about my sex droid getting malware than me getting syphilis tho.
Just imagine updating ur sex robot and then it stabs u just after u cum

I'm ugly as shit and I refuse to lower my standards.

Bullshit

Because my wife would not appreciate that

I hadn't even considered that...it'd be one hell of a way to go, kek. But, that's why you have to use the extra money you saved from not having a 3D woman and invest in some martial arts lessons. So, if/when your robo-waifu suddenly goes
>HAND-SONIC VERSION 03!!
you'll be ready.

Isnt that what men have been doing since the beginning? Or do you prefer to call them commodities?

>and trying to not tell her that i just want her to leave

Hooker. Fuck a young clean hooker. They exist but are expensive. You pay for quality though, right? You pay them to leave, and you'll probably be sad to watch her get dressed, if you're not then you're a faggot and you should just fuck your waifu pillow.

Trust no one

Ease up on the edge, you might trigger some people.

That looks appetizing, user. How would you afford such meals?

Seems like a lot of effort for a non-issue. Just fuck women bro. I'm sure there's a woman out there for your Android-fetish ass.

No, m8. Women are cold, calculating, and as soul-less as androids, but they have a legal system on their side pitted against men. I don't like that. I also don't like how regular women can't be turned off unless you beat them in the head with a blunt object. If/when my gf/wife is nagging non-stop, I'd like to have the ability to simply flip a switch and put an end to the incessant nagging.

Not to mention, of course, other things android women will do that 'real' ones won't/can't.

Because I had a bad experience with a girlfriend once and have never done that since.

Also talking to grills makes me swear profusely.

Cuz all the women that I interact with are either filthy sluts or taken

Krieger??

and then you're going to tell me "every time you want to get off, pay for that expensive clean ugly bitch"
no
i'll fuck this sexy doll i have all i want with minimal cleanup and no small talk.

Alexia?

He's one of my more favored characters.

what's the point?

I'm gay :)