OH GOD HES COMING INTO YOUR ROOM HURRY

OH GOD HES COMING INTO YOUR ROOM HURRY

...

Directly to my left is a wooden broom handle with a steel ball bearing on the top of it, so unless the burglar has a gun I should be a-ok

>implying I have a house
You really think I am that successful... :^(

Wait, again?

I made this picture a few months ago. Are people using my shit?

Niggers aren't allowed in my neighborhood at all anyway so I'll be fine

Where the fuck do you live? Nazi Germany?

ah pair of some pretty heavy duty pliers

I have a knife directly in front of me

Can opener and toenail clippers
>come at me bro

I keep a fully loaded mini-katana by my bed side at ALL times JUST IN THE CHANCE OF THIS HAPPENING. I have reason to fear because I am surrounded by niggers.

A black man's arm.

>a fully loaded katana
we gun sword now

Throw my laptop at him

if he got a gun, im probably fucked. but if he got anything else, hes done. got a machete, combat knife, throwing knives, and a custom tact sword. also my one handed in skyrim is 100.. just sayin.

Loaded 9mm pistol within reach, feels good man.

I also got a "cane" that opens and is a rifle

my .380 Kurz is right below my monitor on the bottom shelf. I always have it within arms reach
>inb4 murica
>fuck you yooroops

Same here, just picked mine up a few days ago.

I know right? I dont really even like guns, but they serve a purpose though. Come in my house, get fucked up.

you must live in a shithole if you need to keep a gun with you at all times

fucking hell user

I'll keep masturbating to show dominance

I HAVE A TAZER IN REACH AHAHHAHAHAHAH I WIN NIGGERS

...

>this is what future victims actually believe

AMERICA, FUCK YEAH!

Nice gun, Mr. Carl Walther from Germany.
Why don't you post your social security card as well?

>reddit-tier humor
just fuck off

no i just don't live in a shit tier country where I've known anyone thats ever been robbed or burgled

I have doors that can resist a swat battering ram, so I'm fine.

I have a gun rack with six guns (sks, mosin nugget, 870 express, mossie 500, and S&W M&P 15, and a .22) in one closet I have a tokarev handgun, a WASR-10, and a PS90. I have a S&W M&P shield in 40 S&W in the other closet that is loaded. I should be gun unless I fuck it up.

Carl Walther XD

But it was asked what is in your reach, the rest is not of interest

hi sweden. Enjoy cuckland

Pipe wrench, sledgehammer... good to go. Next.

I live a few hundred feet from some klansmen. If a nigger ever came at me, the Klan would come to my aid

I bet her name's on the briefcase... oh there it is, Samsonite, duuh

An NEC SV9100 phone system

completely wrong by a few thousand miles my redneck amigo

Well you got me there, I'm fucked

Once you post something on Sup Forums it's not your shit anymore

1 liter Glass mug
>Tiem to get flabberglassed

>knowing jiu jitsu
>body is a lethal weapon
>comeatmebro.jpg

I have my trusty knife like in front of me

remind me to never fuck with you

My Bokken
I'm good, rip burglar.

>redneck
>mfw your perception is way the fuck off
>yfw I'm god-tier sicilian and my heritage destroys whatever shit-tier country you live in
>no face, because fuck you

Mug of green tea...

>A giant fucking crowbar
feels good to be a mechanic

Bitch Im poor as fuck, you think I can afford more than a 2 room house. Shit. Let him find shit, fuck dude I'll help him

I CHALLENGE YOU TO A POKÉMON BATTLE!

...

I've got a shotgun, a 3 spears, a cold steel sword, two combat hatchets, and two k-bars

Tonight's going to be a terrible night

WHY IS THERE WATER ON IT

I have:
An Ak47
A sword
A machete
Body Armour
A knife
All at my bedside
This guy is fucked. Lol

I didnt know so many badasses visited Sup Forums. Damn.

I'm in the bath
It was the best thing I can find

Ill put on dress and dickstick then ask burglar if hed like to fap to Sup Forums trap threads with me.
Would secretly livestream while i turned burglar into faggot.

I'm good. Pic related.

dull neck knife. but it is pointy so i might be okay.

I've got a disease ridden uncapped syringe that I found in a bad part of town where the junkies congregate.

Dude that's fucking awesome

12 gauge, katana, combat knife, liquor bottles, a small dog

Just go ahead and take me Burglar-Kun, I won't fight

>Scissors
Pls don't let him have a gun.

Depends on what he's got I guess.

Depending what side of the bed I'm on either a Jericho in .40 S&W or two Rem 870s (duck gun and race gun)

Grab my sks

2 foot long schedule 80 metal pipe. He better have a gun cause I'm about to fuck him up.