Roast me

roast me

you look like Jacob Satorius

i can't, your perfect

>Jacob Satorius
oh god man. come on. I said roast me. Not compare me to some little shit satanic spawn child

*puts you in oven*

thanks dud

How fucking tall are you? Or do you just have midget doors to make you feel better?

...

haha 6"4. I'd consider myself fairly tall. but im sure my family got smaller doors just to fuck with me

youre pretty damn cute OP how bout some dick pics

Looks like you cant even get a solid six pack if you even tried

ikr, my abs are hopeless. doomed to live a life hidden behind a layer of fat. hopefully the gym membership i've had for 6 months and used twice will eventually pay off

thanks guy. not quite the roasting i was expecting

I will take a crack at it.

The picture makes you look like you have a whale for a forehead. Your body looks like you tried going to the gym, but all the bigger guys scared you off. Now you look like puddy.

thats the spirit. read me like a book. my 5head gets commented on a fair amount. and I did go gym a few times, but i seriously couldnt be bothered with all the gym rats at my gym

Also, what is with the watch. You are indoors, holding your phone, and you do not have a shirt on. I guessing you are just trying to look good for some gayass profile pic on some social media.

it is purely aesthetic. but not for a profile, im not that much of a faggot to post a topless pic on social media with a body like a toadstool. was just for some chick

you look like bella thorne m8

picture to compare? i dont see it

She must of been very disappointed. A sad pic of some mayo.

What are retarded? Nothing similar.

she seemed to like it. made her send some back so its a win for me

You're cute and look like your ass is well groomed for 9" bbc.

kek, thanks. never had it and never will. but thanks anyway

I'd roast ya, but honestly I just feel bad for anyone that looks THAT close to Ray William Johnson.

>Ray William Johnson
kek. all i need is that hobo looking stubble and a squeaky voice and im in

If you spent as much time not being a colossal closeted cock gobbler as you do sculpting your "14 year old girl looking on point for instagram" eyebrows, you'd find a great deal more peace in your life.

>"14 year old girl looking on point for instagram" eyebrows
haha actually made me laugh. maybe i should make an instagram and upload my eyebrows. heard chicks dig em

You look like you could be Ryan Phillipi's extra chromosomy brother

kek, this niglet already looks like his own extra chromosomy brother

not a very good roasting ey. thought id get worse

Were your "PINK" by VS panties dirty, or what?

calvins are great

isn't that gay code for spit roasting twinkster?

20% Body Fat, No Muscles. I don't even have to ask if you lift, you don't. Learn to eat properlly, go Lift.

isnt what gay code?

damn, go for insecurities. sneaky. i respect the harsh truth

You're actually pretty cute user. I'd say either bear down and lift, or do something to lose a little bit of body fat. Flat tummy is best tummy (:

damn when did everyone on /b get so polite? thanks bruh, I'm working on it. I look better than i did a year ago so its all good