B

b,
how do you kill someone and get away with it ?

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npr.org/2015/03/30/395069137/open-cases-why-one-third-of-murders-in-america-go-unresolved
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Sauce on the gif

hire a hitman

shoot them middle of nowhere with bullets u never touched

Become a cop

>be a cop in the ghetto
>join any branch of the US military
you'll not only get away with it, you'll get a medal and praise.

Make sure they aren't white

be rich and powerful and get someone else to do it

don't leave evidence

If I told you I would have to KILL YOU

isn't foolproof
Markings on bullet can be compared to gun
You have to transport the victim somehow which most likely leaves evidence in your car
You have to kidnap the victim somehow which will most likely leave some kind of evidence, be it dna on the kidnap location, on the victim, on their clothes or anything else
Can't always make sure you got no witnesses. You'll have to be extremely lucky for no one to see you, your car or the victim
OP most likely wants to kill someone he/she knows which is a connection, however faint it might be. Don't underestimate collective intelligence of the victims friends and family

There's also things like mobile phones to think of.

getting away with murder involves not spilling any blood at all

Give absolutely no fucks about being caught. Just kill as many as you can then smile when they take you down.

...

Join the army or stab somebody in a dark alley with a custom made shiv. Get rid of the shiv, leave no fingerprints.

If I was OP I would try to kill the victim with some kind of poison that can be administered unsuspectingly like spilling a cocktail laced with cyanide like the iceman did.
Or using something like fentanyl which is easily overlooked in autopsies

See

i could tell you, but then id have to kill you.

It's easy.
1) use cash
2) no car
3) do in area with no cameras
4) kill someone random (no connection what so ever)

What you need to do is

1) get yourself an alibi
2) get some disposable clothing and spare clothing
3) if you can make it look like an accident
4) If you cannot, then make sure to pin it on someone else who has a valid excuse for murder
5) Make a set list of said victim's movements. Find an opportune moment for the murder, better when they're alone and away from company, and either pin the murder, maybe leave a knife soaked with the prey's fingerprints. Make sure that at this time you are 'somewhere else' and that someone can verify that to the police later

When carrying out the murder, put on the disposable clothing, you are gonna need to get rid of this later

There are different methods of murder, for accidents you may want to to try Carbon Monoxide.

For pinning the crime a knife works best, you can just take it from the pinned person's kitchen.

Arson is another good way to kill and very easy at that. Just wet their carpet with gasoline and light it. Make sure it isn't snowing so you don't leave any tracks and leave on foot, not by car. Wear a large disposable coat for this one and only bring a lighter and gasoline. No phone, get that when you are making your escape

I hope I have helped with you query, come again buddy

why custom made? Makes no difference
It's still gonna splatter blood which leaves traces even if you try to wash it with bleach. Spray traces with luminol and light it with a UV lamp and bam you're caught.
There's also the chance of leaving trace evidence from yourself like DNA under the victims fingernails if they manage to fight back. Or slipping on the knife, cutting yourself and leaving your blood.
Then there's the possibility of witnesses etc

Someone has been watching too much breaking bad.

OP, if you decide to kill someone. Don't be stupid and use a fucking knife or a gun
Strangling or poison is the least likely methods to leave evidence. Anything involving blood leaving the body you can consider high risk

And I shouldn't need to say this but don't stick your dick inside someone

Pouring gasoline before lighting a fire is a surefire way for investigators to conclude it was arson.

kill someone that no one cares about in a city that has an overburdened police department, bums and sex workers in Detroit for example

Which is why you should pin it on someone else. Use someone elses lighter or a pack of lighters from a bar that the pinned person regularly visits and leave them at the crime scene

OP tell me more about who you want to kill. Do you want to kill to experience what it feels like or is it someone you need to get rid of?

By stealing a lighter from someone you want to pin involves interacting in some way with that person which connects you more to the crime.
The best you can hope for is that they find a fingerprint on the lighter and then somehow connects it to an unrelated person that actually didn't have anything to do with the murder.
Unless you wanna pin the crime on someone close to you that wouldn't be suspicious if you just started hanging around or even noticed that you took the lighter.
It could even be the case that the person notices you taking the lighter, but not saying anything because they're not cheap enough to cause an awkward situation. Once they find the lighter that person is gonna give your name to the police once they're interrogated.
Again, don't underestimated collective intelligence of near and dear to the victim.

The most solid methods works by not involving any connections to anyone.
For example, buying poisons off of tor or using rope for strangulation.
Strangulation involves close interaction with the victim though and could potentially leave evidence like dna under fingernails and such.

>Unless you wanna pin the crime on someone close to you that wouldn't be suspicious if you just started hanging around or even noticed that you took the lighter.
I phrased this wrongly.
Unless you wanna pin the crime on someone close to you like a friend. It would seem suspicious if you started hanging around a specific person in order to steal a lighter or a packet of matches.
And again, you can't pin a whole murder with one box of matches or a lighter.

for sure step 1 is to ask about it on / b /

>wellplayed.jpg

kill whoever, then kill yourself
simple

I agree that Arson is a very beginner move on most parts.

My best method is instead on rope of TOR, buy some Carbon monoxide. It's colourless, tasteless and weightless. They would't notice what hit them.

holly motherfukka

triple doubs

The whole point of the lighter and box of matches is to lead the investigation team off in a different direction. Make sure you pick someone with a motive though. I'm not saying this person has to be a friend, I'm saying stalk this person and steal it off them when you get the chance

Kill yourself

make it look like an accident.

Depends where you live, for example, near me you can either dump corpses out in the bush and pigs will eat them pretty quickly, or you can dump them in a thin but extremely deep creek, the current under the surface runs very quickly and pulverizes anything that falls in it.

Other than that you need to make sure the person you are killing isnt a close tie to you. If they are you will need to wait until they leave town and find a way to follow them without anyone knowing, prefferably with an alibi that makes police think you never left town.

The problem is administration of carbon monoxide.
You can't just buy a tank of it, place it in the same room and open the valve. You would have to buy a huge amount of it to actually kill someone unless you can connect it to a facemask, then attach the facemask to the victim without them waking up
It could be an alternative though if you know the victim is taking really potent sleeping pills and you hang around long enough to remove the facemask and tank before you leave.

IF they even find the person owning the matchbox or lighter, they're gonna interrogate the suspect and really quickly conclude that he or she is not related to the crime.
You might lead the investigation team off for a few days. But you're not avoiding anything, just postponing it.
It's not a smart move since you've left more connections between you and the crime just to get a couple of days extra time before they dismiss the person you pinned it on

be rich, then you're suffering from affluenza

With monoxide all you have to do is play around with the air ventilation. If you turn the fan around, it pumps monoxide into the house rather than vice versa


other one (yea, both this faggot)

which is why you need to pick a mark very carefully. Someone who would gain from the victim's death

Don't kill someone you personally know or have some sort of obvious connection to.

>go out for a walk early morning
>avoid all CCTV
>go somewhere like a park
>have hammer inside plastic bag
>beat a lone jogger round the head with it
>ditch carrier bag
>take hammer home
>fap

Just make sure it's someone totally random that has no connection to you and make sure there's definitely no witnesses. The park was just an example of somewhere you might find a jogger, but in all honesty you could go out at 2am and find some random drunk stumbling back home. Run up behind them, beat them with the hammer in the carrier bag (or bags, wouldn't hurt to wrap it in 2 or 3), and ditch the bag. You could probably get away with just leaving the bag at the crime scene, it's not like they'll be able to learn much from it anyone, and it means less for you to think about having to dispose of. Make sure you wear gloves to avoid prints in case they find the bag. Wash the hammer when you get home. If you do it right, there shouldn't be too much blood splatter on the hammer. Go for an entirely steal hammer, don't use one with a wooden handle, blood will wipe off easier from steal than it will from wood. Wood will stain and potentially retain your victims blood/dna, It's unlikely the cops would be able to trace the urder back to you in the first place, but in case they do, it's good to have your bases covered. Oh and put the gloves in a carrier bag, tie it up and either ditch it in a public bin somewhere, or you could burn them.

It's not a toxic gas, you die from suffocation. You need a high enough concentration of it which means replacing enough air in the house until it's actually lethal. Imagine how many tanks you would have to get in order to just spray it in through the ventilation...

Just "picking someone who would gain from the victims death" is first and foremost not a simple thing to do
The person you pin it on can easily have an alibi as well so it's a dumb chance to take because of what I mentioned earlier.
You're only creating more connections between you and the crime in the hopes that
first of all, you don't leave ANY traces whatsoever yourself.
Second they even find the lighter.
Third they actually manage to connect the lighter and find the owner which is a slim chance even if they have a fingerprint on it.
Fourth the person doesn't have an alibi
Fifth unless they find any other evidence at all against this person, they're gonna dismiss him or her anyway because having found a lighter close to the crimescene is not a strong lead to go on

Don't get caught.
That's how the pros do it

> Shoot them
Retard detected

Well, I guess getting away with murder isn't that easy is it?

Back to the drawing board

Maybe you could try bleach. Think about it, if you put a little bit of bleach in someone's drink every day, eventually they would get poisoned.
Now, how much bleach would still be in the body for that to be considered suspicious?

>pin the crime on someone else
Unless you're the CIA or a movie villain, this is how 100% of all idiots get caught becaise they don't know how a criminal investigation works.

I would say hire someone and somehow make sure they're not gonna rat you out if they get caught.
Or kill using a method leaving as little evidence as possible like strangling

Assuming you know the victim, and you'll be a likely suspect, you would be wise to make it look like an accident or disease. It depends on what is the information you have on the person.

If he drives a lot on highways, you can sabotage the car. Mechanical error would cause an accident.

If you can get a hold of ricin, spiking the food (maybe even an industrialized product like a chocolate bar using a syringe) could be a good option.

You could explore a medical illness by manipulating medicine. Replacing the content of a capsule could be a good solution, or just putting the wrong pill with a similar look among the other ones.

You know, it all depends.

But, you know, don't kill anyone and shit, this is just very hypothetical.

Hand them from their ceiling fan, make sure it's in a bedroom, make sure they're asleep when you do it, set them up like they'are hanging them self, kick the chair. Make sure the noose is kinda loose. If they survive it, force them to write a suicide note and force feed them pills

Out of interest, how do you plan on "forcing" them into going along with all this? Do you think someone will just let you hang them from a ceiling fan? Pretty sure most people will put up a fight, which will show when they have bruises from either hitting you, or you hitting/restraining them. Dumbass/10

You get someone else to do it, someone without relation to you.

Or just live somewhere where you can shoot intruders on your property. Invite them over, shoot them, make up a good reason why you did it. No other witnesses.

What if you are planning a perfect murder? not some CIA or movie villain but simply someone with an ego?

KYS. It's the perfect crime.

No it's not easy, that's the whole point

If you're gonna poison someone, why not use a substance that isn't immediately obvious through an autopsy?
It's already been suggested in the thread. You have 3 good alternatives, which you wouldn't have to administer more than once. They're all extremely potent as well so a small small dose would be enough.

accident or disease are good options. If you're sabotaging a car, make some research on sabotage first and make sure it isn't something that can be found, even by a small chance

If producing ricin, make sure you get everything anonymously, preferably by mail.

If you're planning a perfect murder you wouldn't go with a movie plot.
You would go with something that is actually practical and not risky as fuck in real life

You can only get away with shooting black people.

This. Witnesses would be your biggest risk

Thats why you do it when they're asleep, if they wake up use chloroform to knock them out, then kick the chair, if it looks like suicide it'll be open and shut, if the autopsy shows it was suicide open and shut, wear gloves. Now if you want to make a disappearance, get writing samples of both of them, mimick their writing exactly then right notes say they're leaving together that way everyone knows what your mom did to you and they'll think she left with the bully

tie them tk the roof of your car.

>Mix chlorine bleach and rubbing alcohol to create chloroform
>Use the chloroform to knock out your target
>Follow your target for a few days to learn their basic routine before acting
>Attack them in an area with little surveillance and traffic, preferably at night and with your car parked nearby
>Tie them up and gag them(bring rope or an extension cord or something)
>Drive them to a remote location and kill them however you like
>Buy your supplies in several stores in different towns
>Make sure you have an alibi of some sort. No plan is foolproof

Pretty sure you've killed someone before

lol hire someone to do it
jv8xmv94nvcnxc.onion

Also, to take care of the remains, buy some lye and bleach to dissolve the body tissues, then spread the remains around the area

>how do you get away with it ?
You don't.

I'm pretty sure he hasn't

Pretty sure you've been watching one too many movies there. Maybe a hint of breaking bad in there too, not sure

Chloroform doesn't work user.It does but only after 10-15 mins of holding a fucking rag to their mouth

So Sup Forums is The Bone Collector now

Nope, but I did accidentally make chloroform once. That was an interesting experience

>how do you kill someone and get away with it ?

1- wait for them to die of natural causes or something that has nothing to do with you
2- rub hands with glee and take credit

This is the only way. Revenge seekers, contract killers, thrill-killers with no connection to the victim, get busted all the time. There is no statute of limitations for murder, and it turns out it's very hard to kill someone without leaving behind a trace. If you have a motive, it's impossible for them not to suspect you.

About the only murders with a chance of going unsolved are ghetto murders among people who live in the ghetto. There, witnesses are afraid of people even suspecting them of talking to police. So nobody will say shit about anything they saw, even if they had no connection to victim or killer. And if you were a ghetto guy, you wouldn't even be posting here.

>chloroform won't show in an autopsy
>It's easy to lift a fullsize human onto a chair
>It's easy to balance them while you fumble around trying to get a rope around their neck without dropping or bruising them in the process
>when cops see a hanging body, they say it's suicide, case closed, no further investigation necessary

>retarded 14 year old detected

AIDS

No one on Sup Forums knows. Everyone here is too autisitc and would have to brag to everyone, getting them caught.

suicide

Ok so we've got poisoning down. What else?

Ah yea that's right, what about if you just make someone disappear. The police can't charge you if there is no evidence of death.

Burring a body is gangster shit and not only takes ages, but also ruins your cloths. My own recommendation would be to dump the body in the ocean if you can. If you cannot, then you'll need to chop the victims into many pieces and feed them to an animal like a pig, dog or even a cat. Pigs work best but there is also the issue of finding pig.

Basically OP, just become a gangster or poison them

Careful not to mix ammonia and rubbing alcohol, though. Trust me

Or you could just guilt them everyday of their life until they kill themselves

OP, listen.

If you have to ask, then you are too stupid for this.

Go back to sleep.

You need to make a spear out of ice. Stalk them, and thrust it through their heart when they're somewhere in public but out of eyesight from witnesses, like a parking garage. No witness, no murder weapon, they'll have nothing on you.

Final post
If you want to have some fun, a dead body can't say no. Finally, you can make peracetic acid with hydrogen peroxide and vinegar. Just in case you need something to remove evidence :^)

More than 211,000 homicides committed since 1980 remain unsolved – a body count greater than the population of Des Moines, Iowa. That figure is not readily apparent in the U.S. Department of Justice's annual estimate of killings considered cleared through arrest, but a little digging at Scripps News revealed it.

If you're gonna fuck a dead body, at least wear a condom

...

Unless it is so worth this persons death that you take your own, it is too risky, now-a-days. Forensic technology is very advanced. DNA, camera's everywhere. People who thought they got away with murder 25+ years ago, are being found, and getting that "knock at the door". Yep, "government officials", CIA, FBI, can get away with it. I would like to think that in 2016 OJ would not have got away with it, with technological advancements.

ITT edgelords that think they can kill and get away with it.

Of course. Doing otherwise would just be amateurish.

Take them to the dead sea and push them into it.

>Walking streets with ice spear
>nobody notices
excellent plan user, if you love north of the fucking wall

wrong- that 200,000 figure is from the 1960s onward. Current clearance rates of homicide are about two-thirds.

But the 2/3 rate varies wildly by locality.

npr.org/2015/03/30/395069137/open-cases-why-one-third-of-murders-in-america-go-unresolved

>take care of the remains
>spread the remains around the area
Yeah this guy definitely seems to know what he's talking about.

You mixed rubbing alcohol and bleach. You seem to be quite the underground chemist there buddy, wouldn't wanna mess with you unless I wanna get attacked with household chemicals

Making someone disappear is definitely a valid option. But not an easy task.
Dumping in the ocean is not a good idea since there's a very high risk of it floating back ashore again.
I think you've been watching snatch one too many times when you're suggesting feeding a body to a pig. First of all you need to have access to a pig farm and second the pigs need to be starved if they're even gonna be interested in eating human flesh at all.
Feeding to a dog or a cat would take literal months.

Better alternative of making a body disappear is actually to drain the body of blood (bathtub suggestively) then cutting it into pieces or freezing the body before you cut it into pieces. The point in which case is to not splatter any blood anywhere
When you've got a chopped up body bury each part like 6 feet deep with several miles between each part. Preferably deep a forest or on different farmlands.
Lots of fertilizers used by farmers contain ammonia which first of all confuses a dogs nose and second of all is dangerous for dogs. So they won't search farmland as actively
Some soakaways on farmers land can be alternatives as well as they usually contain lots of ammonia too. Problem is that body parts might float to the surface or otherwise discovered by a farmer.

They would float like a motherfucker though. Wouldn't work, they need to sink

this is an entertaining topic for fanciful discussion but you are going to get caught if you try something like this

Use a peice of rebar or a brick to club person to death, leave body alone don't touch it run away destroy weapon (brick rebar piece of metal).

bomb

It's possible, just not very easy. Which is why it's fun to theorise about different methods

Get an abortion

>2011+5
>not living north of the fucking wall

>1 in 3 chance of getting away with it.
>Most murders committed by stoopids
It wouldn't take much planning to get away with it if you were smart

read the rest of the thread. This is gonna get you caught sooner than you have time to say fuck

Don't ask on Sup Forums on how to get away with it.. FBI is reading this shit like its time for a motherfucking promotion.

>ice spear

Well, the thing you have to consider is that you not only have to worry about the forensic technology in use now, you have to worry about all advances in forensic technology for the rest of your life.

Take DNA, for example. Murderers back in the 70s didn't have to worry about DNA because it wasn't a thing then. A bunch of old cold cases from before DNA have since been solved using DNA evidence.

This means that you can commit what you think is the "perfect crime" now, but a decade or so down the road, there could be a new technology that fucks you. Basically, you have to try to predict and account for all possible advances in technology to really be safe.

Get close, systematically mentally abuse them, depression and worthlessness, suicide

poison, gloves and a gun with a makeshift silencer, find their allergies, higher a hit man,fat hooker

Dam, you are real good at this. Crocodiles would eat anything so there's an option.

To be honest though, I don't think I'm ever going to kill another person. Takes to much effort and I'd end up in hell

For making a body disappear, another option is to, you know, eat them. I could imagine dropping a body in Acid wouldn't be as effective as it was in Breaking Bad, as you have to deal with some suspicious liquid in your drainpipes or garden.

Oh, protip, if you have access to a crematoria, fucking use it

No