Apocalypse happens like now

Apocalypse happens like now.
>what do you do?

Fap to loli for 3 hours straight and then KMS

jack a car and head to belgium

why Belgium?

fuckall happens there also it's a 3 hour drive for me
also mountain plains w/ forests to hide
also they sell firearms

Make tacos

sell my self to the strongest guy and be his bitch mean while ill ride it out

The apocalypse? Hell yeah man, gotta few of my boys together- make a sanctuary and role with the madness and the wasteland.

Good Idea

just walk away

Now theres a plan.

if i knew i would book it to the mountains with survival gear and a bunch of fleshlights - if i did not know i would try the same thing only i would have to get the fleshlights on the run

eat my mixtape and spew fire on the bad zombie peoples

Scream bomb in the Costco washroom I'm currently shitting in, after everyone is out, lock doors, pull down security gates, and use a forklift to create barricades and chain the emergency exits. Put perishable foods in freezers and insulate them while the power is still on. Create awesome forts and catwalks in the shelving.

grab my ak, throw about a weeks worth of shelf stable food and other gear in a bag and start sta- ...walking north

>tfw live in central minnesota

Go North. The end.

I'd do fuck-all, first. Grab a beer, sit down. Chuckle. Seeing as it's the supposed apocalypse, long-term survival looks like a 0% (unless it's a false alarm and turns out we'll bounce right back somehow). Irregardless of whether we are completely fucked or not, I'd take the wealth of knowledge I even have, some improvised and not-so-improvised gear, and stay away from the initial chaos.

There would be a 30% guarantee that someone would decide to shoot me in the head (or just shoot me), though. Ain't a nice place 'round here for my kind of folk. Barring that, I'd be home free.

I'd probably either slide right into a position of authority/voice of reason/means of production/means of medicine/teacher for some small sanctuary in the middle of Butt-Fuck Nowhere, America's Hat... or I would tell people to fuck right off, grab a , and just go places with no real rhyme or reason than to enjoy what's left.

Or, you know, I could just run around naked before shit hits the fan after shit hits the fan, and kill myself while society is only then beginning to fall apart.

Fucking pulling the pin on 400 grenades, fuck yeah.

bug in. plant larger garden.

make my bathtub full of water.
i think i will survive in my apartment for a few months. if water and food runs out, i will take my machete, and break into the next apartment, kill the people and live there until food runs out...repead
if i see survivors i will scare them away with my airgun, if they come near me, friendly or not, i will hack them to pieces with machete. cant take the risk...

bump

>444

no one noticed...

Good Idea user, just make sure there aren't any other strong sugar daddies to kill yours. Worst scenario is he takes you to be his bitch instead.

last bump

Die a slow death

why not end it with a bang?

>Because wimper

my gun safety routines are too strong

I already own fireamrs and food supplies so i guess i would just wait for things to calm down or maybe remove some kebabs for shit and giggles

back to ifunny

close plan to mine but grabbing a boat for scandinavia once i there

lower average population size means better chance for general survival and less competition for resources

...

hunker down with my supplies and guns trade 39 cent cans of beanie weenie for sexual favors with the least ravaged women in my vicinity

wait, did you say mountains in Belgium? What Belgium has is some tall hills. Barely.

Fuck a girl that has a feminine penis

See if I could get a lot of heroin and hide and shoot it for a while and try to kill myself with it when I'm running low or shoot myself in the head when I run out.

hence why you hop a boat to sweden or norway
better chance there than in central europe

grab sks

go innawoods

dont die

Keep scrolling on Sup Forums
Don't give a shit if world is burning or freezing anyway

-"an' I spare you lives."

eh. id fuck him

what if there is no internet?
how do you shitpost irl?

lol

>have fun in the winter

ride eternal