Be me

>be me
>get in the mood for some pepsi
>drink some pepsi
>tastyasfuck.jpg
>burp

anyone else got some good burp stories, Sup Forums?

>be me
>drink soda
>join isis
>go to suicide bomb
>allah-
>burp
shit

>be me
>burp.png
>starts vomiting
>keyboard covered in vomit
>damnimthirsty.jpg
>drink my own vomit
>mfw I burp up the vomit again

Kek, this thread is off to a good start.

I tried very hard to tell Bernie how to be the man and succeed..................

But he is very weak and he just folded up....

*Brups*
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
FFF
FFF
FFF
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
FFF
FFF
FFF
FFF
FFF

...

>be me
>get in the mood for some pepsi
>drink some pepsi
>tastyasfuck.jpg
>fart
sorry op, i have failed you

Hey, kid. *snaps fingers* Over here, I'm behind you. I can see just by the way you're walking around, all light footed like a cat in a dog pound, that you haven't been here long. Don't even deny it, I've been here longer than you've been able to spell "moot." That said, I know what a terrified newbie looks like. Normally I don't take to the fresh shits like you. Half of you won't make it a week anyways so I don't see a point in acquainting with the rookies. But listen, kid, *leans in close* there's been some talk about you lately. A bit of a buzz. Normally Reddit transfers don't get much respect, but I've heard some of the Sup Forumstards around here, including some old fags, say to keep an eye out for you, they think you've got potential. *Pins against wall with hand* Well listen up, buddy. I'm here to tell you, to warn you, that none of that means shit. Do NOT let it go to your head. You'll be brought shot back down in an instant. You wanna make it here? Work in silence. Don't go running out there like some big shot looking for attention and exposure. Because the very moment you start to slip up, you are exposed, and alone, and they'll pounce on you like *snaps* that. *Unpins* Just keep your head out there. Develop that "potential" they see in you quietly. And, most of all, just watch you back...

It's ok user we have all been there

>Be me
>Eating some prostitute's ass
>Going hard on that anus
>Stomach gurgles
>shitnotnow.jpeg
>Burp into her ass
>She's surprised by this and farts on my face
>Not standard fart either, a really wet fart
>Feel myself on the brink of vomiting
>Chuck her off my face and dash for the bathroom
>Too late
>Vomit on hotel floor

Fuckin' Coca-Cola burp ruined my night

...

>Be me
>On the Sup Forums
>Thirst all of a sudden
>Scream at mom to bring me my Mountain Dew
>Guzzle that shit down while stroking my glorious neckbeard
>Chair collapses under the extra weight of a gallon of Dew
>Ass slams into floor, causing shock waves to reverberate through the house
>Feel fat waves across my gut
>Shakes up the dew
>Urge to burp
>Burps
>Vomit up Cheetos, tendies and Mountain Dew
>All over my MLP plushie and fedora
>Rage and tell mom to clean it up
>Gives me the saddest look and hear her whisper to herself
>FUCK OFF MOM I DONT CARE
>Burp some Doritos into my lap

...

>Be me
>Just now
>Get in the mood for some ice cold Coca-Cola
>Drink some ice cold Coca-Cola
>tastyasfuck.jpg
>Burp!

>be me
>10
>Uncle always nice to me
>always offered to babysit me
>coolman.jpg
>one day he asks if I want to play a game
>sure
>he says that we have to get in our underwear first
> weird, but okay
>he starts tickling me
>i run
>he catches me, tickling and sort of rubbing me onto him
>feel something poke
>he pulls underwear off, tells me to feel
>?okay?
>he starts moaning
>he has me stroke his cock
>cums on my face
>cleans me up and tells me I can't tell anybody

>this shit continues for another year
>eventually move onto blowjobs
>I'm a pretty sheltered kid, never knowing stuff like this was real
>one day mom walks in on us
>he's touching me
>she yeals, beating him anf crying
>cops come
>I'm fucked up
>uncle arrested
Years go by
>current year
>go buy dr. Pepper
>drink in 1 gulp
>burp
The end

I too like Dr. Pepper

Dr . pepper cherry vanilla is best

Dubdubs
Also weird Numbers.. Youtube 88 and 23 together

>be me
>dinner with parents
>window open
>let go a good loud one
>neighbors' dog throws a shit fit
>won't stop barking
>neighbor comes out and screams at dog to shut up
>mom mad at me for getting cute little bichon in trouble

>burp
>hurts like hell
>have stage 3 bronchial cancer
>my last breath could very well be a burp

>brother and I practiced belching the alphabet with our 10 and 11 year old lungs
>fill with air
>regurgitate air
>practiced for hours
>parents disgusted
>working harder and harder every day
>best strategy is to speak it all as if it's one word
>became fluent in acbdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz
>one day finally hit z
>so fucking ecstatic
>go to brother
>I DID IT I FUCKING DID IT
>he knows what I'm talking about
>deep breath in
>begin belch
>instead vomit everywhere