I'm 29 and havent had sex in 3 years...

I'm 29 and havent had sex in 3 years. Should I hire a prostitute and just get one on the board before I get even weirder? Pic related I guess.

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give up

If you've got the money to spare, go for it. Why aren't you getting laid?

Honestly I dont know. Never had much with the ladies. Spent a lot of my 20's drunk or on drugs and my social skills and confidence are practically zero.

Don't do it user. Go to classy places, meet classy girls, and, if you get that far, fuck them like it means something. Girls love it when you WANT them.

Tried that. No one would touch me with a 30 ft barge poll. Honestly I'm pretty ugly physically, damaged mentally and under-developed emotionally so women stay the fuck away usually.

I also have no money, have moved back in with my parents, and have self harm scares all on my wrists

save up and go with a proper classy escort if you do this.

talk to their handler beforehand and explain you want a girl who knows how to handle an out of practice guy. if you can't have a comfortable conversation about this with them, then they're not for you.

keep it in mind that this is a one time thing to just kick start things. like getting a jumpstart. don't make it a habit.

At the risk of "sounding like a fag"... fix it. Decide to fix it, user. What helped me? Church. I found a non-judgemental, Jesus oriented, "we're all broken so lets just help each other" kind of place. No joke. It took me YEARS to get over myself and build up the courage to walk through the door.

Other than that, work out. Don't get all chad like, just get fit. If your job/career is steady, you are fit'ish, and your mind is at least somewhat church oriented, it'll all fall into place.

Former die hard Athiest who fucked MANY prostitutes in past years talking here, user. I'll never look back.

Start at the bottom at the biggest company you can find and work your way up, then.

Buddy of mine did. Kind of a dumbass in HS, but works at Frito Lay. Got 8 promotions in 15 years because he can follow directions. Save up that cash and buy smart

I have been working out the last 8 months or so so thats something. No job and employment history shaky as fuck due to mental health problems. Not sure about the church thing but glad it helped you user.

I'm not even sure how to go about doing that. Are they all online these days?

Get married and you will soon get accustomed to that.

>Former die hard Athiest who fucked MANY prostitutes in past years talking here, user. I'll never look back.

fucking prozzies turns you christian? explains jesus

hahaha

Basically, yes.

You can also walk into a massage parlor in your neighborhood, those places are everywhere, and about half of them are bordellos.

youtube.com/watch?v=FGwFZj3YPwY

>29
>Implying not married
>implying no kids
might as well off yourself

My buddy started as a packer in the shipping plant. He makes 130K/yr last he told me.
@ 29, it's all ahead of you. Go watch "The Departed" again. "No one gives it to you, you have to take it." "If you decide to be something, you can be it." No one starts at the top, man.

as for the ladies, well... find new groups and people to hand around. Re-invent yourself. Don't carry your past with you when you go there.

Stay away from the hookers, user. They are hollow inside, most of them. fap instead. plus a waste of money.

Thanks for the feedback anons. I probably wont hire a hooker. I am worried when I finally find a girl who'll fuck me I'll be too nervous and fuck it up some how. Gonna try and get a job I dont hate and get as swole as possible and hope for the best I suppose.

I wanted to hear about the missionary hookers.

I dont want to hire a prostitute in the "normal way" (i mean like in your pic OP), but i find it way more enjoyable and "secure" to get in a small bar and drink some beer waiting for the girls to come ...

Of course, you have to chose your bar wisely, if you choose it too 'classy' girls wont come to you unless you are brad pitt, and if it is too trashy, the girls will be ugly and/or junky whores ...

When you find the right spot, just go there and wait while having your beer or whatever else you want ... It shouldn't be long before a wild girl appears in front of you ...

Even if i dont really care about it, it is better for self confidence beacause you can always tell yourself that the girls chose you and not the other guys ... And when you re ok with self confidence, you will become active and search for "real" girls for free sex ^^

He'said not getting laid so must have a fair bit of spare cash kicking around

On medical benefit for my broken brain. Spent a lot of it on workout related stuff though

yeah hire a hooker just due hoes once in awhile and it will be ok OP

Fuck. You don't pick up hookers in a bar. Get on the net. Find a good quality site and find a proper escort. Costs more but much better result

I do pick up my hookers in bars ... i just did it on last tuesday ...

i should have said that i'm not in US maybe ...

OP here. I'm in the UK (just outside London) if that makes a difference to hooker habits

Craigslist my good man.
Just post an ad every day, make yourself sound like a decent guy, fit, attractive, etc. Dont sound desperate, and dont expect to get laid the first day - just keep posting each day until something happens

It makes a TOTAL difference, i'm currently living in central africa for work, and it is not even fun here .. where ever you are, as long as you are white, a girl will come to speak to you and ask for a drink ... every hour in the street and every fucking 2 minutes in a bar ...

What so just post an ad saying 'does anyone want to fuck?' (not those exact words obviosuly)

You just say you're looking for a decent girl to hang out with, I look like xyz, own place, etc.. Don't say you wanna fuck, just 'hang out' or 'have some fun'