How do you hypothetically deep fry a person?

How do you hypothetically deep fry a person?

Other urls found in this thread:

washingtonpost.com/national/man-dies-after-falling-into-yellowstone-spring/2016/06/09/4255c6de-2d1c-11e6-9b37-42985f6a265c_story.html
fmobserver.com/fargo-man-arrested-for-flash-frying-entire-cow/
twitter.com/SFWRedditImages

>Cut into pieces
>put on batter
>fry til crispy
>enjoy

washingtonpost.com/national/man-dies-after-falling-into-yellowstone-spring/2016/06/09/4255c6de-2d1c-11e6-9b37-42985f6a265c_story.html

The principles of deep frying do not change no matter what the object you are frying, all that changes is the scale. Based on the history of cannibalism I would say you treat human flesh like pork, hypothetically speaking of course, and go with a dredge instead of a batter.

>hypothetically

Or

> Buy wood logs
> Buy a heat resistant barrel
> Cut her up a bit so she fits
> Find a way to hang the barrel above the fire
> fill with oil
> Dump her in
> Don't forget some kind of hook to grab her, turn her. Heat resistant gloves, apron an protection from possible oil burns.

they deep friend a cow that was injected with cheese on aqua teen, so I assume the same hypothetical situation would support a human

How much supplies would I need?

Cut her in strips, dip in beaten eggs, dredge in flour with a little salt and pepper and throw in the fryer

That's all you need

I think it's a bit fucking obvious, but go out at night and be sure to bring a gun with you, go deep into the woods with the materials and then do the deed.

Also Make sure to burn the victims belongings and clothes found on the body in the fire, then collect the ashes, cut up the bones and chuck them in a bin (hiding your face) and just pour the ashes out the window while driving.

This is all hypothetical, of course; hopefully you will hypothetically get away with it too ;D

Hypothetically, throwing anything into a bin is a mistake. People expect to find things people want to get rid off into bins. In case something goes wrong, this is where they will look.

Burry it somewhere else is better imo.

Also, phones really fuck you up, don't turn it off but leave it at home.

Hypothetically, any suggestions on what she could be seasoned with?

Look I'm not saying anymore you know the drill

This is what I like to use to season mine:
2 tablespoons paprika
1 tablespoon onion salt
1 teaspoon celery salt
1 teaspoon rubbed sage
1 teaspoon garlic powder
1 teaspoon ground allspice
1 teaspoon ground oregano
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon black pepper
1 teaspoon basil leaves, crushed
1 teaspoon marjoram leaves, crushed finely

Hope this helps :D... hypothetically...

You sure the measurements are correct?

Okay I would maybe times that by 15-17, depending on how much you are hypothetically planning on eating, I usually eat a piece at a time, hypothetically.

Anyone else do this?

I know nothing about hypothetical deep frying. To ACTUALLY deep fry someone depends on if they're live or dead first. You'll need splash guards if they're live; hot oil goes everywhere as they struggle.

Live may be easier. Any further information if the subject is living

Hypothetically sedate her then.

well theyll die either way may as well just do it first

post more redhead

And keep it turned on. Also but bones and teeth in bottled cokes, burry them elsewhere

Would the sedatives carry over to her meat, hypothetically. And it would take a while to cover her in the breading, batter, and seasoning

Dont do it while they are conscious. You shouldnt risk someone hearing their screams. And use a boltcutter to remove fingertips. Theyare hard to eat and easy to identify. The goal isnt only to avoid being identified but also to keep the body unidentifiable, so they cant trace her steps before the grill party

Use strong opioids in small doses, often redosing instead of having to risk to start over the seasoning

Also you should come up with something to get rid of the leftovers

So that's why I would shoot her in the head with a shotgun, hypothetically, and then do this to her corpse; but if you don't have access to a shotgun, just do your best to murder her and then deep fry her, otherwise she could escape, or she could fight back. the sedatives should be fairly dead when you deep fry her hypothetically.

If no shotgun, sedatives and bag on head. Shotun tends to get messy, and eating the opiates especially after fried wont hurt you.

That's why I usually tie them up hypothetically and then take them deep into the forest and hypothetically shoot them in the head.

I never liked leaving shit behind. Also to OP: youll need about 400 kgs of wood tp burn the remains if you are planning on that

*Hypothetically

I really hypothetically want to do this with her sedated just to see what it would be like now

Would you hypotheticallybe willing to share the finished product?

If my methods werent good enough id use "hypothetically" too

Conscious or unconscious?

lol'd

How would I prep her and cook if she's awake? This is an honest question

Simply fucking don't keep her alive, don't stress her either because it will toughen the meat, You need to gut her and burn the guts, make sure there is no shit in there either because that would hypothetically fucking disgusting and if you went to the doctor (which you would have to) they would detect human flesh in your pee.

For gingers just put in sunlight without sunscreen. Crispy

>deep fry a Person
>posts pic of a ginger
Kek

With ebough painkillers to ease the pain but stay conscious

This is such a fucking stupid thread. Cringy ass edge lords

Hence your presence

How do I get them to her?

Go ask ISIS or Hannibal Lecter.

god she looks delicious. jacking off atm. i would rape her before cooking her because the cum would season the meat, internally

pics?

There arent enough painkillers in the world to make a person not feel being fucking deep fried yet stay awake.

Anyone have more hypothetical suggestions?

Nigger what

Literally how you would deep fry an entire cow.

See: fmobserver.com/fargo-man-arrested-for-flash-frying-entire-cow/

Shut up boy

when can we expect the meal op?

Human rotisserie.... love it

Work in fast food

Put it in her food or inject her with it.

Important to secure the meat well with skewers