Marlon Brando's appetite drove a bird into extinction

Marlon Brando's appetite drove a bird into extinction

>Marlon Brando was fond of the taste of a certain breed of bird found on his personal island atoll, Tetiaroa. Brando considered the fowl a delicacy and regularly ate them in his time there, and his staff would regularly scour the island for them. He often offered the meal to guests. One of Marlon's friends, who was an amateur ornithologist, took notice of the bird and sent a sketch of it for reference to a university. Upon reference, the bird appeared to be the thought extinct Tahiti Red-billed Rail. Much to his horror, he learned that Brando may have accidently hunted the bird into extinction; by the mid 70's no more Tahiti Rails were found on Tetiaroa. Brando would spend less time on the atoll in the next few years.

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>Robert De Niro was reportedly the victim of several practical jokes pulled by Marlon Brando during filming, including a remote controlled electronic whoopee cushion.

what a selfish prick

Literally me.

Living on his island of Tetioroa, Brando created what he called "real-life Mounds Bars" by cracking open a coconut, melting some chocolate in the sun, then stirring it into the coconut for a tasty treat. By the 1980s there were reports that one of his girlfriends had left him because he failed to keep his promise of losing weight. He seemed to be dieting, but to her astonishment, he never lost weight. She found out that Jack Nicholson had been throwing bags of Burger King Whoppers over the gates of his Mulholland Dr. estate late at night to relieve the hunger pangs of their famished friend.

Brando was expelled from high school, allegedly for riding a motorcycle down the hallway, which forced his father to send him to Shattuck Military Academy in Faribault, Minnesota. Once there, Brando wrote that one night he climbed the bell tower, removed the 150-pound clapper, then carried the clapper 200 yards and buried it. In a stroke of genius, Brando then organized a committee to find out who was responsible. He was never caught, but got himself expelled anyway for other infractions. After that, in the spring of 1943, he moved to New York to live with his sister in Greenwich Village.

look at him he is god. what's a couple of birds?

>She found out that Jack Nicholson had been throwing bags of Burger King Whoppers over the gates of his Mulholland Dr. estate late at night to relieve the hunger pangs of their famished friend.
What a bro.

haha what an absolute madman

>have looks, talent, money and women handed to you on a silver platter
>eat yourself to death anyway

he literally gave no fucks his whole life

what a cool ass dude

he was considered the greatest actor ever yet had nothing but contempt for the profession

Michael Gambon did the exact same thing on the set of one of the Harry Potter movies.

I think he suffered from an eating disorder. His parents were alcoholics, so he got an addictive personality as well, except in food.

Marlon Brando once took a liking to one of his daughter's boyfriends and wanted to hire him to build a new deck for the house. When the young man told Brando that he had absolutely no background in carpentry, Brando simply bought him a bunch of Time Life self help books on home construction. Sure enough, over the summer, he built a new patio deck for Marlon Brando.

also men
fucked alain delon and toyed with his feelings

>I think he suffered from an eating

You don't fucking say?

>It may well be the most outlandish road trip since the wheel was invented: a cross-country dash featuring Elizabeth Taylor, Michael Jackson and Marlon Brando, in the aftermath of the 9/11 terrorist attacks. The trio reportedly took turns driving, with Brando allegedly fueling himself on a diet of junk food.

>Details of the trip emerged in a Vanity Fair interview with Tim Mendelson, Taylor's former personal assistant. It came about after Jackson invited the two Hollywood actors to be his guests at a pair of concerts at New York's Madison Square Garden in early September 2001. Following the attacks on the World Trade Centre and the subsequent grounding of all internal flights, the trio were forced to find alternative transport back to the west coast. Mendelson claims they wound up driving a modest rental car all the way to Ohio – a distance of more than 500 miles.

>The trip was not all plain sailing. "Brando allegedly annoyed his colleagues by stopping at every KFC and Burger King they passed along the highway," writes Vanity Fair reporter Sam Kashner. "One can only imagine the shock their appearance caused at gas stations and rest stops across America."

He made it to 80

He only started letting himself go after he achieved GOAT status and he still got paid exuberant sums of money just to show up in movies

what I wouldn't give to be a fly in that car

fuck make a movie about this or something. Brandos life make a movie, win another oscer leo

Sky has a pilot in production based on this story.

When's the Marlon Brando, Michael Jackson, and Elizabeth Taylor 9/11 road trip movie happening?

imdb.com/title/tt5320014/

Fat bastard.

>Brando so hungry that he has to eat MJ's hat and nose during a photoshoot

he also sucked the BBC

>In 1991 during the filming for 'Point Break' Keanu Reeves (whose role involved playing rookie FBI agent 'Johnny Utah') was surfing with co-stars when a small child was dragged under the waves and began to struggle to stay above surface. As his co-stars rushed to help, Reeves held out an arm in front of them, stopping them and was reported saying by Lori Petty (who played the character Tyler Endicott in the film) "The waves have claimed her, let her fight for her own life". The crew, dumbfounded, proceeded to watch her struggle until her body disappeared beneath the waves, lifeless. He was later spotted outside the child's house, making drowning gestures and thanking the family for their child's sacrifice to the great ocean.

It was actually a white Dingus.

Meh. Would have been better to replace Keanu with The Goose in this one.

tippity top kek

Shut the fuck up.

it was a prank bro

>That casting

Fucking perfect Agamemnon will be amazing as Brando

>girlfriend
I doubt he cared

Was he the one Jack Nicholson would toss Burger King hamburgers over their divider when Marlon's wife tried to make him go on a diet?

You sound like a massive faggot.

>After completing the movie 'Speed', Reeves disappeared from public view for 6 months to complete a project he called his "life's calling". In August of 1995, Reeves gained notoriety for hijacking a school bus in Los Angeles and leading police on a 10 hour chase, ending in tragedy. Reeves, who appeared mentally disturbed and sporting a full beard, reportedly spent 6 months planning the hijacking. Due to the nature of the hijacking, police assumed it filming for a sequel to the Speed movie, and didn't respond until Reeves drove through a crowded marketplace, killing 16 and injuring over 100. Despite their best efforts, police were not able to stop Reeves, who drove the bus full of 44 elementary school children off the Santa Monica Pier. All the children died, and autopsies showed that all 44 had been molested by Reeves during the chase.

>He was later spotted outside the child's house, making drowning gestures and thanking the family for their child's sacrifice to the great ocean.
every fucking time

How new are you?

Circa 2009 famalam. I miss Atatap and Frosted Jack and Glau threads. In fact, there were so many shitty waifu threads this place was like the wild west of television discussion...

The bird story is bullshit though which is just silly because there are dozens of true hilarious stories about Brando.

In October 2001, Keanu Reeves met with the families of 9/11 victims. After a brief interview in which he expressed his condolences and hope for closure, he reportedly burst out laughing and made airplane noises and mimicked two planes crashing. He then picked up the child of a deceased victim and whispered into her ear "Your dad's dead, bitch", and proceeded to put on a pair of sunglasses and unleash a barrage of martial arts attack on the small child. She was rushed to the hospital where she was pronounced dead due to extreme trauma. When asked later about the incident, Reeves became visibly sexually aroused and repeated the same attack on the reporter.

This has been proven false.

the bird?

I die laughing

Every time.

His success coupled with his inability to give a single fuck honestly inspires me.

In 1999, with his star turn hit The Matrix crushing box office records, Keanu Reeves would often walk the streets in his black glasses and trench coat. Assuming character, he would proceed to lure small children away from their front yards to high rooftops. In what he later would call "an attempt to recreate the Morpheous and Neo training scene", Mr. Reeves would send dozens of children plummeting 10-30 stories to the the sidewalk below, injuring bystanders on more than one occasion. We reached out to Mr. Reeves via letter for a comment before publishing this article. He mailed back pictures of him desecrating the gravesites of several victims as well as a sticky note that only read "Mom's gonna freak".

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