ITT: Players who would've become criminals or terrorists if they weren't good at playing football

ITT: Players who would've become criminals or terrorists if they weren't good at playing football.

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He would have founded a cult and scammed people for money and power.

Tévez, Banega and Rojo

How is that any different from what he does now?

He would just be a regular portuguese gypsy selling socks and tshirts for 5 euros each and dealing drugs on the side.

Benzema. Well he became a criminal anyway.

Ibrahimovic was born and raised in a Swedish Muslim Ghetto, he admitted that he stealed bikes, he also is arrrogant, I could see him as a future ISIS recruit.

Nah, Portuguese gypsies only mug you on the street or sell drugs

Any south american

90% of the NFL nigs.

Talking about Isis recruits

Almost 90% of the French NT would be Street thugs If wasn't for Football playing skills.

Pepe would be a thug for some low tier mafioso

Obligatory

He looks like a Mulatto or even a sandnigger, are Italians even White?

You clearly don't know pepe...
Hes a good guy

He's catholic tho

Rooney. Either a petty thief or a bald low-waged dockworker

Renato Sanches would be Arnold Schwarzenegger's biggest enemy

t. negrinho

>What are converts?

kek

it's a pretty known fact, mediterraneans aren't white.

He would be a child soldier in Sierra Leone or wherever he's from

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top kek

Convert how?
His father was a "muslim" and his mother catholic.

The funny part is that this is 100% true.

An old family friend called him Jew. I always thought that was appropriate because Ibrahimovic certainly doesn't fit in with Svenson or Johanson.
I never accept that guy as a Swede.

Wtf are you talking about LOL obviously by the end of the summer nobody is white except dungeon nerds come in winter and find me a brown skinned italian if you can

>Earns millions
>Blackmails for thousands
He went full Dr.Evil with that retarded idea.

youtube.com/watch?v=xyyqoHCkw9I

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A lot of people here get their opinions from footymemes

The Syrian Ibrahimovic, Omar Al Soma

Probably would be fighting against Assad's men.

>Probably would be fighting against Assad's men
>believing the amerifat propaganda
lel

I can already see him squatting with his bidlo m8s

>No Tofting

Step it up Sup Forums.

He would have become a Rabbi

>mfw Balo was unironically accused of antisemitism by the english FA for posting a dank meme

>tfw western asian
>still lighter than zaza

i'm lighter than most arabs desu

Why are his fingers so fat?

Rooney would have been in jail for joyriding, he's iq is literally too low to work in a warehouse or bar. if he fucks around with hookers again I could see him becoming gazza but worse

I hate him but judging by his interviews, he isn't that retarded
Kane on the other hand...

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He'd be the guy forcing you to rob a bank while keeping most of the profits because of a favor he did for you back in prison.

Or get caught with 3TB of kiddyporn

>£25k fine for this
>raised in a Jewish family

I came here to post him, he unironically looks like a Bond villain

he would literally be running a cartel in south america right now

Its much easier to be good guy when your rich

SACRIFICE ON RAILWAY TRACKS

Pic related.

Oh wait he actually DID found a Bavarian Mafia organization (what also happens to be a football club) after a career ending injury.
The absolute madman.
>A hund is er scho'

A lifetime of bar brawls with a few stabbings here and there.

SEND TRANSMISSION FROM THE ONE ARMED SCISSOR

bueno taste, papi.

Balo is great

He would have probably ended selling coke and pot in the street if it wasn't for football

I remember the press going apeshit insane about this.

The best was when people relentlessly calling him a nigger got all offended because he was such an antisemite and a racist.

Good times, I miss old Balo.

exoskeleton
charging at the railroad tonight

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Speaking of coke.

He'd have joined ISIS after converting to Islam.

i really don't get what you are trying to say

He would be a drugdealer now

More than half of chilean squad
Hell, Medel's family was full of narco aunties and cousins. Anyway, he is a good lad.

Not on the pitch.

Adriano - mid level drug dealing
Felipe Melo - armed robbery/kidnapping/homicide
Ronaldo, Ronaldinho - pickpocketing

What a monster, how could he be attracted to this poor child.

Well he is really nice outside the pitch. But his family it's shit desu

They could give him a role in Narcos

did they try to hang him or what holy shit

He got burnt with boiling water as a child.

Didn't fix his face because he doesn't give a shit.

he dropped boiling water in his face when he was a kid

When Zlatan grew up in Malmö it wasnt nearly as bad as it is now, Sure it was kinda shit by Swedish standards but not third world tier shit it is today. He wants piety points when hes talking about the "harsh environment"

debt/protection money collector

>Adriano has better trigger discipline than the other guy

He is half-Indonesian lol, could one of the bad guys of the Raid movies.

His sister looks like a tranny

More like your average squatter.

Kek

Better pic here.

I hope he will come back next year, but he need to be more confident and more CALM

that jaw tho

which Brazilian player would have been a transexual?
I remember in my city Palermo in a very poor neighborhood there was a lady who worked in prostitution who was called Ronaldinho because she had big teeth and lips.

Cult leader for sure

which he already is

also half the nba would be in some kind of gang

finally suarez

>repeatedly drives drunk and injures people
>nice guy

I've seen much worse, honestly.

Would be a model

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this guy definitely

my nigga

was doing the quenelle every time i scored for weeks

RIP you absolute madman

this polemic was so damn shit, they used to say the quenelle gesture was nazi tier, in fact it just represents how far in your ass the jew are putting there arms, so you can do a little quenelle from half arm, or deep quenelle from shoulder ;) it's just fun banter from a comic there, but you know, as long as we touch at the jews we're racist xenophob and not humans...

Pretty much everyone south of Sweden and their immigrants too.

Literally do South Americans even have jobs besides football or coke dealing?

thought you can buy drugs online like normal people in Portugal, because of the lax laws

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Drugs aren't legal, thing is its consumption does not constitute in a crime

>Le Bandera is my hero face

TIL, thanks bro

aren't consuming drugs imply you did get them in the first place? How is that not incriminating?

I assume about 70% of the football slavs are criminals anyway.

Remember that Steven Gerrard has family connections to organised crime and had to give evidence against his family once. Without football, he would probably be Phil Collins's bodyguard.